Dayknightmare… A Parody Of Sorts.
Chapter 8: The quest continues Again….And again…. And again…. And again….And again!!
A/N: Yay new chapter! Gotta love this….. I'm actually aware that this is starting to get a plotline….. oh horror of horrors! But I suppose it isn't that bad… it at least has some form of structure now…. I'm in my English lesson writing this, so please understand the eloquence of my wording…… PSYCHE! As if I'm going to be eloquent. I'm supposed to be doing an essay but meh… got two weeks to do it, rather keep myself entertained before then! It'll only take me a day or two tops to write. Anywho…. Onwards!
We left our chaos bringing authors in a form of turmoil… M.G was feeling kinda down after capturing one of 'The Bloody Enemy' and sending him straight into Authors Hell! But with the capture of one led to the escape of another and the gang still have the greatest of the two rogue authors to face….. not to mention that they only managed to get all of three steps into Level two.
M.G: That last chapter really blowed!!
SPA: AMEN!!!
M.G: I mean I'm glad we got rid of one of them…. But I still feel kind down…. I should be celebrating… GAH!! I'm so confused!
SPA: -Pats M.G on the shoulder- I know, I know it's bad… but you can't dwell on it. It looks like you need a drink….
M.G: Oh NO! I can't….. I have a fic to write…..
SPA: And that's never stopped you before….
M.G: TRUE! But I wasn't expected to make an appearance in those ones…
SPA: Go on… one little drink… it'll help you loosen up.
M.G: NO!!!!! I can't…..
SPA: Go on…… -Gives puppy dog eyes-
M.G: NO! Don't you dare try the puppy dog eyes on me………………
SPA: Just one won't hurt –Puppy dog eyes intensity X 1,000,000-
M.G: Just one….
SPA: Just one… promise…. –Evil grin-
20 minutes later
M.G: I thought... –Hic- I told you to just give me one
SPA: -Giggles drunkenly- I did…. And then I gave you another 'one'
M.G: -Glares drunkenly- And then another one and another one and the a whole load of other 'one's'…… and then one for yourself.
SPA: True…..
M.G: Aren't I supposed to be doing something…..
SPA: Probably…. One of those ficcy things you do…. –Hic-
M.G: Ah… now I remember….. it's that da-day-dayknightmare thingy innit! –Laughs- I like that…. I can be stupid in that…
SPA: -Laughs- You're always stupid. After all you fell for my EVIL plot!!!
M.G: -Affronted- HEY NO FAIR!!!
SPA: -Cackles evilly-
TRE: What the hell was that?
M.G: The hell was what? –Sniggers-
TRE: That evil cackle thing… it was creepy…
SPA: -Hic- Oh that was me listen –Cackles evilly-
TRE: And why exactly where you doing that?
SPA: Coz I managed to rope M.G into my EVIL plot!!!
PIC: And what exactly would that be?
SPA: -Evil grin- Getting her drunk of course…..
TRE: And WHY exactly did you want to do that…….???
SPA: -Sobering up- Well one…. She's much more relaxed when she's had a bit to drink...
M.G: Tis true –Giggles-
SPA: And two… It's her birthday…. And I think she's allowed a little fun don'tcha think….
M.G: HEY YOU REMEMBERED!!!!!
SPA: Of course…. How could I forget….You've been going on about it for the last two weeks…
M.G: -Blushes- Oh yeah……
TRE: So now we not only have an insane author on our hands…. But a DRUNK insane author!
M.G: YUP –Laughs insanely-
PIC: We're SO in for it now aren't we!
TRE: I'm afraid my dear Pickle, that we most certainly are.
M.G: What are you guys in for…. Is it the egg and spoon race?
ALL: -Groan-
M.G: HEY don't you groan at me….. Let's get this –hic- thing moving…. Lose it or move it….
TRE: -Shakes head-
SPA: -Fully sober- You heard what she said… unfreeze that lot!
PIC: -Produces Pixie wand and waves it-
CHR: I HATE THAT!!!
M.G: So….. –Hic-
CHR: Did she just hiccough?
TRE: Um… do you want the very scary truth or a nice little lie….
CLA: I think the lie would be best…
TRE: Well then, no, no she didn't…. It was just a figment of your imagination… she is not roaring drunk; you're imagining it all…
GAR: SHE'S DRUNK!!!!
M.G: YEAH I AM!! Gonna make something of it? –Shakes fist drunkenly-
SPA: Er…. Not a good idea M.G…. he'd probably cream ya'… either that or you'd pass out before you could get down there….
M.G: Again NOT FAIR…….
SPA: But probably true….
M.G: -Shrugs- Yeah whatever……
TRE: EHEM!!! We have a quest to be getting on with…..
M.G: Oh yeah… -Sniggers- …. I forgot about that….
TRE: J.Lo are you okay….
J.LO: I'm fine…. Just a little woozy still…. That's the last time I ever let anyone take over my body….
M.G: -Laughing madly- Take over your body and you people call me insane…..
TRE: -Looks worried- Um…. That's true... You took over her body… so you could kick one of the rogue authors' backside….
M.G: -Quietens-…. Did I?.... I don't remember it….?
SPA: Ooops… I think I gave her too much….
CLA: You sure did…. Just what were you guys drinking?
SPA: You really don't want to know….
ALL: -Look worried-
CHR: Is she gonna be okay?
SPA: She'll be fine once it wears off…. Although when that is I haven't the foggiest.
TRE: Let's just move on in the mean time…
SPA: I think that's probably for the best….
M.G: I AM THE BOSS AROUNG HERE!!! I TELL YOU WHAT TO DO…. –Breaks into laughter again-
SPA: Ah man…. This is sooooo bad.
J.LO: Okay morons! Where am I going?
GAR: Just walk straight ahead…
-J.Lo does so and walks into a castle doorway. She ends up in a room with a table in. On the table there is some food, a scroll of parchment, a spyglass and a yo-yo-
J.LO: Where am I?
CLA: You're in a room and there is a table with some items on walk forward until we say stop.
-J.Lo walks forward and bangs into table-
J.LO: OOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!
ALL: -Snigger-
M.G: -Mockingly singsong- Ha-ha you banged your foot, you banged your foot!
J.LO: Shut up you drunk little creep!!
M.G: -Sarcastic- I'm hurt…..
SPA: -Nervous- Did I also mention that she gets more sarcastic as well….
TRE: Quit whining and check out the items on the table….
J.LO: FINE!!! Right food, spyglass, scroll, YO-YO! Not the bloody yo-yo again!
M.G: -Giggles-
CHR: Right…. Put the food in your knapsack…. –J.Lo does so- ….
J.LO: Now what….
CLA: I suppose we could read the scroll….
J.LO: -Opens scroll- It doesn't say anything… wait it does…. 'TELEPORT'
CHR: Think its a spell….?
GAR: I would…. Write it down anyway….
J.LO: Okay I'm gonna take a look at the spyglass…
-Goes to Lord Fear's throne room-
LORD F: So he has been captured….
NEILUS: Yes my Lord…. I'm afraid he has…. He underestimated the girls' power….
LORD F: I see…. And he paid for it dearly didn't he. I trust you will not underestimate her?
NEILUS: Not at all my Lord…. I have had more 'experience' with her. I know what makes her tick….
LORD F: -Laughs evilly- Then go forth and rid me of these pests….
NEILUS: Will do my Lord….
LORD F: Hmm…. I feel another presence….
NEILUS: My Lord?
LORD F: We are being monitored….
J.LO: EEEP!! -Throws glass away-
SPA: You know what…. I'm really glad M.G is drunk at the mo…. That conversation would have REALLY pd her off.
M.G: What would have peed me off? Just two random guys… -Hic-…. Nothing to do with me…. –Passes out-
SPA: Whoa boy…
TRE: What just happened?
SPA: Um…. She just passed out….
TRE: -Slaps forehead-
PIC: Why would have she got pd at that.
SPA: Do you people not remember anything that I tell you!!!
TRE: Um…. NO!
SPA: GAAAAAHHHH! Well if you DID you would remember me telling you about the guy Lord Fear was with…. It's M.G's mentor…. The one who helped her when she was just starting out. Her and Johno were both mentored by him…. That's why she's finding this so hard!
ALL: -Looks nervous and regretful- Ah… right.
SPA: So we have to finish this before we have to meet up with him…. I really don't want to think what'll happen otherwise….
TRE: Come on then people let's move it!
CHR: J.Lo take two large sidesteps to your left –She does so-, okay take another one –J.Lo does so- Perfect! Now walk forward….
J.LO: I better not trip over anything…. Or else your all gonna feel my wrath…. –Walks forward through doorway-
-Is in long passageway-
SPA: CRAP!!!! OH-NO!!! It's one of those bladed corridor things…. We are in the turd now….
J.LO: BLADED CORRIDORS!!!!!
TRE: Just stay still… don't move at all…. As soon as you do it will start….
SPA: Right guys… you're gonna have to be seriously quick here….
CLA: We can do it!
CHR: J.Lo all you gotta do is listen to us and as SOON as we yell the direction you have to move…. Think you can do that?
J.LO: -Gulps- Yes….
GAR: Okay let's go….
J.LO: -Walks forward, passageway starts moving-
GAR: LEFT!!!!! –J.Lo dodges left-
CHR: DUCK!!! –J.Lo ducks-
CLA: Stay where you are!!
CHR: RIGHT!!! –J.Lo dodges right-
GAR: LEFT!!!! –J.Lo dodges left-
CLA: RIGHT!!! –J.Lo dodges right-
CHR: STAY!!!
J.LO: I'M NOT AN ANIMAL!!!
CLA: DON'T ARGUE!!!! LEFT AND DUCK –J.Lo does random roll thing-
GAR: Hey nice move
J.LO: HELLOOOO!! Concentrate!!!
GAR: OKAY! RIGHT!!! –J.Lo moves right-
-Corridor comes to stop-
ALL: -Starts cheering- We did it, we did it!!!
J.LO: HELL YEAH!!!!
GAR: Now turn to your left and walk forwards….
J.LO: OKAY ALREADY!!! –Turns left and walks forward, stumbles over feet-
ALL: -Stiffle laughter-
J.LO: I CAN HEAR YOU STOP IT!!!!
ALL: -Snigger very quietly-
J.LO: That's better!!
-She walks through the door into a huge cavern-
J.LO: Where am I?
GAR: You're in a huge cavern and there is one door to your left and one to your right.
-Random person jumps out on J.Lo… it's the jester guy Motley-
MOT: Well hello there, you're a bit funny lookin ain't ya! –Bangs on helmet-
J.LO: -Growls-
MOT: Not exactly user friendly are ya?
PIC: -Groans- I hate this stupid bungling clown!
TRE: I know you do Pickle…. But until we figure out what he wants and how we can get rid of him we're stuck.
J.LO: -Miffed- What's your name you impudent little git…
SPA: Wooooo J.Lo used a big word…. She's all grown up –Wipes away imaginary tear-
J.LO: -Glares-
MOT: Now that's no way to speak to someone who can help you…. I was going to show you the right door…. But now I'm not going to bother!
SPA: J.LO!!! Act all humble NOW…. We need to know the right route!!
J.LO: HAH! I can find the right route on my own…. I don't need any help from this FASHION REJECT!!!
???: -Sarcastic- That cut deep –Holds hand over heart- real deep…. Well see you later then guys…
SPA: WAIT!!!!
MOT: Huh! What was that?
SPA: It was me…. Stop playing the fool, we gotta get serious!! Can you show us the correct route through Level two….?
MOT: I can show you some of it…. But what's in it for me?
SPA: The fact that I don't tell your boss Merlin that you've been stealing his Pipe weed! –Evil grin-
MOT: .. T-that's not possible…. Er I mean true…. That's not true…..
SPA: Come on Motley we really need a hand! PWEASE……. –Puppy dog eyes X infinity-
TRE: OUCH! Man they are effective!
MOT: Don't I know it…. There being aimed at me!! Alright, ALRIGHT!! I'll help…
SPA: Yay!!! Thank you SOOOOOO much!!!
MOT: Hey girly what's your name? You so gotta teach me how to do that…. I'd rule this place in no time
SPA: Yeah, yeah keep dreaming! The names Sparrow…. But you can call me almighty mistress of DOOM!!
ALL: -Give Sparrow 'The Look'-
SPA: WHAT!!! I've always wanted someone to call me that!
ALL: WEIRDO!!!
SPA: Yes we all know I'm a weirdo…. Can we please move it people!!
ALL: FINE!!!!
MOT: Okay the correct door is the right one…. Come on I'll take you –Grabs J.Lo by the hand and guides her through the door-
-They enter the next room which is a tunnel with a meirman patrolling the end-
MOT: AH NUTZ!! I wasn't expecting a guard to be here! Right stick close…. –Walks slowly up Meirman turns and walks other way-
J.LO: What are you doing?
MOT: Trying to sneak past this guy…. They're vicious!!
J.LO: They look like a cheap Hollywood B monster!
MOT: I wouldn't stay stuff like that…. You'll hurt her feelings!
J.LO: It's a girl…???
MOT: Yes can't you tell…. The scales are a slightly pinker colour than the males….
J.LO: No I couldn't tell and excuse me for not being a wiz at 'Dungeon creatures 101'
MOT: SHHHHH! She's coming back get ready to move….
-Meirman walks past-
MOT: -Whispered- NOW!!
J.LO: Gotcha –They move past the Meirman and down the passage to the left-
-They are now in a room with a well in the centre-
MOT: SHEET!!! Dam I thought I'd out run them…. Right you're gonna have to trust me here…. Jump down this well…. It will keep you safe!
J.LO: BUT IT'S ICKY!!!
MOT: And I'm sure you'd prefer your guts smeared over the walls as an alternative?
J.LO: I'll go down the well!
MOT: Right I'll hold them off while you jump in….
J.LO: Gracias! –Jumps in-
MOT: Good Lllllllllluuuuuuucccckkkk –Echo fading effect-
-J.Lo lands on the floor below with a gentle bump-
J.LO: -Looks shocked-
SPA: WHAT???
J.LO: You missed the chance to dump me on my arse……. UNREAL!!!
SPA: Don't look so surprised….
-Bell dongs and J.Lo freezes-
SPA: Well we made some progress…. But that's not saying much…. Wanna freeze the rest of them?
TRE: With pleasure…. –Does rap style groin grab dance and freezes the other three-
PIC: That dance was just wrong My Lord!
TRE: Indeed it was… but it was fun –Smirks-
SPA: All we gotta do now is wait for M.G to wake up and we can get the rest of this show on the road….
R.V: I think that's where you're wrong my dear Sparrow… the road stops here…. And you're little friend is never going to wake up!
SPA: WHAT THE!!!!! –Spins around-
NEILUS: Surprised to see me? Not very hospitable are you…. But I suppose it will do….
SPA: -Panicked whisper-…. Shit…. M.G wake up…. Come on…. Oh shit….
And we shall have to place a curtain of cliffhanger over this situation. The boys downstairs are powerless to help…. So that just leaves one very inexperienced Sparrow and one very unconscious M.G. What will happen? Are the two authors about to lose their realm… find out and see on the next chapter of Dayknightmare…..