A/N: YAAAAYYY! HOLIDAYS! Which means…. ME FINALLY DOING SOME FANFICTION WORK! W00t! this has been FAR too long in the making. Sad as it is this is actually my largest fic –Looks down right scared- Man that is sooooo creepy.

Dedication: This chappie is dedicated to all my lovely people on the net who haven't yet discovered I'm insane –Insert maniacal laughter-

Chapter 10:

The Quest Continues Again….And again…. And again…. And again….And again…. And again…. And again!

Dun dun dunnnnn finally after a rather LONG break we have returned, admittedly with more than one problem. Treguard is still unconscious due to his rather scary date with Lynette, and well the whole place is just in total chaos. Which I suppose when you think about it is no different than usual –Giggle-. Anywho let's get on with the show….

M.G: I just can't believe how badly that went…..

SPA: What do you mean badly! That was downright awesome!

M.G: I almost killed Treguard!

SPA: Almost being the operative word there.

M.G: Not funny. You know how difficult it is to find hosts!

SPA: True… but you still have to admit it was fun…

M.G: -Sigh- Strictly off the record… It was a hoot. But in my professional standing it was a complete disaster and I don't condone it one bit.

SPA: -Snorts- Professional…. Yeah right.

M.G: Bite me!

SPA: No thanks…. I'd be scared you'd bite back.

M.G: Enough of this…. I got too many problems to sort out.

SPA: Like how you're gonna punish Mikus for screwing up.

M.G: I'll sort that out later; right now my main concern is waking Treguard up.

SPA: Are you sure that's a good idea…. Maybe it would be kinder just to let him sleep.

M.G: KINDER! What about being kinder to me! –Hyperventilates-

SPA: Okay M.G deep breaths, deeeeep breaths.

M.G: -Takes deep breaths-

SPA: Good girl, good girl, that's it.

M.G: Thanks….

SPA: No problem…. However I do think in order to prevent you doing that again I think we should wake Treguard up.

M.G: Heh…. Knew you see things my way.

SPA: I always do…. Just one question though….

M.G: Yup.

SPA: Well two actually…. First, who is going to wake him up…. And second, how are you going to wake him up.

M.G: Hmmm…. You know I hadn't thought about that…. Let's see who should be our victim.

SPA: Pickle...?

M.G: -Nods- Pickle….

SPA: Method?

M.G: Water over the head?

SPA: Too messy…

M.G: Gong?

SPA: Too loud…

M.G: Poke him?

SPA: Too easy…

M.G: Well you think of something then!

SPA: Fine I will!... Ah ha! Screw Pickle I'll do this myself….

PIC: -Somewhere in background- Awwwww!

-Sparrow goes over to Treguard and whispers in his ear-

TRE: -Jumps awake- YAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! –Starts running around room-

M.G: -Looks impressed-

SPA: That'll do nicely.

M.G: So what did you tell him?

SPA: Um….

M.G: Sparrow… what did you tell him!

SPA: I told him that Lynette was in the room…

M.G: Oh is that all…. I thought you told him his pants were on fire or something.

SPA: Hmm didn't think of that one.

M.G: Think I'd better calm him down…. –Snaps fingers-

TRE: -Bucket of water dumped on head- Waaahh?

M.G: Welcome back to reality.

TRE: What happened? The last thing I remember is being in that restaurant and…. YOU BLOODY IDIOTS YOU ALMOST KILLED ME!

SPA: Not technically true…. YOU almost killed you by being a bloody stiff toward Lynette!

TRE: That is downright unfair. You set me up on that stupid date so it's all YOUR FAULT!

M.G: Who cares whose fault it is…

SPA/TRE: WE DO!

TRE: Here's a thought…. Since M.G doesn't appear to care that much about whose fault it is, I say we blame her!

SPA: -Shrugs- Works for me!

M.G: WHAAA…. Hey now wait a minute…

TRE: I thought you didn't care?

M.G: -Grumbles under breath-

SPA: So were settled then…. It's M.G's fault.

M.G: Bloody mutinists!

TRE: Aw… I never knew you cared…

M.G: -Vein popping-

SPA: Um…. Treguard now is not the best time to antagonise her.

TRE: -Huffs- Fine…. Why do you guys always ruin my fun.

SPA: Usually because it's funny…. But right now because I fear for your life. That and like M.G I can't be bothered finding a new host.

TRE: -Sarcastic- Thank you very much, your concern is warming to my heart.

SPA: What concern?

TRE: Never mind….

M.G: OKAY! When you two have finished fraternizing can we please get on with this thing.

SPA: Sure…. Why not I've got nothing better to do.

M.G: -Glare-

SPA: Um…. Yeah let's get on with this.

M.G: Much better. Treguard if you please?

-Treguard starts to break dance again sending Pickle flying with an awesome boot to the stomach-

M.G: Hey not bad, how far do you reckon he went?

SPA: About ten metres…. Maybe eleven.

PIC: -Winces in pain-

TRE: Hmm…. I believe I could have gotten him further.

PIC: -Mumbles something which can not be repeated-

AUTHORS: -Glare-

TRE: Ladies we can sort this little annoyance out later but right now we have to see to our contestants.

CLA: Oh so NOW you remember us…. We've been stuck there frozen while you lot have been out gallivanting, having loads of fun.

SPA: Um…. And your point is?

CLA: It's not fair. You just stick us here and mess with are brains.

M.G: Again your point is?

CLA: Screw you guys, I wanna go home. I want out!

CHR: Yeah me too!

GAR: Me three!

M.G: -Sigh- Not again….

SPA: Agreed…. Hey Treguard do you want to handle this?

M.G: Whaaa?

SPA: M.G trust me!

M.G: I always do…. Treguard proceed!

TRE: Really?

SPA: Really!

TRE: Brilliant! Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

-Treguard goes all glowy and freaky looking (ala Galadriel LOTR style)-

TRE: You impudent children you will do as your told –Fires lightning bolts from fingers-

TRIO: Eeeep! –Wets pants-

M.G: GGGRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOVVVVVYYYYY! Can you teach me to do that?

TRE: -Back to normal- Sorry, can't do it. It is an official Dungeon master, elf thing only.

M.G: Awwwwwwww –Sulks-

J.LO: Um…. Hello has anyone remembered about me?

SPA: Huh…. Where'd that….

J.LO: Har bloody har. Can we please hurry up as this cave is friggin cold.

M.G: Yeah, yeah, whatever.

TRE: Okay guys lets move it along.

GAR: Fine then. J.Lo, carry on walking forward.

-J.Lo walks forward and through the door and comes out in what appears to be a wine cellar-

J.LO: Okay…. Where the hell am I?

CHR: You appear to be in some sort of cellar with lots of barrels and bottles.

J.LO: And that helps a lot, thank you for that wonderful observation.

CHR: Screw you! I was only doing what you asked me to!

J.LO: Sure you were, I mean everyone should just do as I say all the time.

TRE: Um…. What is up with her?

AUTHORS: -Shrug-

M.G: Hmmm I really have no idea, but in order to make me look like I do I'm going to come up with a random theory.

ALL: Works for me.

M.G: -Gets out her Sherlock Holmes pipe and blows some bubbles- I theorize that due to the extended time in suspended animation, J.Lo's ego has taken over her brain due to the inherent inactivity.

PIC: And in English that means.

M.G: She's got a bigger head than ever.

ALL: Great, just great.

J.LO: Huh did someone mention my name?

CLA: No…. Just keep moving.

J.LO: -Sniffs- No one tells me what to do, but in this case as I can't actually see I'll take your advice.

-Walks about three steps and trips over something-

J.LO: Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

CLA: What the hell was that?

-On the floor the thing that J.Lo tripped over shuffles about and starts to snore-

J.LO: -Looks outraged- HOW DARE YOU TRIP ME UP! –Kicks in random directions and eventually connects-

RANDOM PERSON ON THE FLOOR: OOOOOOOOoooooowwwwwwwwwww that hurt, who in the Lords name is kicking a holy man!

SPA: That would be her –Points-

J.LO: I don't care who I'm kicking. You tripped me up!

RPOTF: You infidel! How dare you strike a man of the cloth.

J.LO: Cloth smoth. You need to move outta my way.

RPOTF: I will not move. Unless you pass my test.

J.LO: Not another one!

SPA: Just deal with it!

J.LO: -Sticks out tongue-

RPOTF: So do you accept my challenge?

J.LO: Ah what the hell!

RPOTF: Okay! Mwahahahaha. If you lose you lose for real!

ALL: WHAT!

RPOTF: Yes I am an agent of Lord Fear, and you have accepted my challenge!

M.G: Oh Poopies!

J.LO: I refuse to lose! What is your challenge!

RPOTF: Simple, Give me my name!

ALL: Whaaa?

RPOTF: Are you all retards or something? Simple enough question. What is my name?

J.LO: Your…. Name? Is that all I've gotta do? Guess your name!

RPOTF: For the final time YES!

J.LO: Oh... Well that should be easy.

RPOTF: -Looks outraged- WHAT!

J.LO: And you called me a retard. I said 'That shouldn't be too hard.'

RPOTF: -Laughs maniacally- You are as dumb as you look!

J.LO: -Sighs pathetically- Perhaps your right...

ALL: -Gawp-

J.LO: I mean how would a poor, innocent little child like me, be able to answer such a difficult question without an ickle clue. –Pouts-

M.G: Oh...My... God. –Shakes head-

SPA: I can't believe she is doing that!

TRE: Doing what...?

AUTHORS: -Look at Treguard as though he is stupid-

TRE: WHAT!

SPA: Well in case you didn't notice she is using her womanly charms to try and woo this fat friar into giving her a clue, nay his name even.

M.G: You got all that from one sentence?

SPA: Yup!

M.G: Dang! I gotta start paying you more!

SPA: You don't pay me as it is!

M.G: Oh yeah... Anywho lets continue!

SPA: But...

M.G: CONTINUE!

J.LO: -Big pouty eyes (which you can't see) and lip- Come on... You can't even give me a little clue?

RPOTF: -Flushing- I... er ... uh... I suppose I could give you a little clue. Think literature.

J.LO: -Looks confused- Lit...era...ture?

TRE: Books dummy!

J.LO: Oh right... Um books. As in characters or authors? –Flutters eyelashes even though they can not be seen-

RPOTF: -Melts into proverbial goo- Um... Characters... SHIT I shouldn't have said that!

M.G: I don't know whether to be impressed or nauseated?

SPA: Nauseated, definitely!

M.G: Agreed -Looks green- Anyone got a sick bag on hand?

SPA: Need one here too!

-Sick bags randomly appear out of nowhere-

J.LO: Hm... let's think literary monks and friars! Well... The only one I can think of is Friar Tuck from Robin Hood.

RPOTF: NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooo! You GUESSED! How could you have guessed!

J.LO: It was sodding easy once you gave the game away! You fell for my womanly charms! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

ALL: -Look VERY scared-

TUCK: That was a damn fine evil laugh! Ever considered turning to the dark side?

M.G: -Groans- I hate that bloody line. It's a cheesy Star Wars one-liner and used far too much.

SPA: But you LIKE Star Wars!

M.G: Be quiet you!

J.LO: No I can't honestly say I've given it much thought! Is the pay good?

TUCK: It's the pits, but you do get great job satisfaction! Torturing people is fun.

M.G: Stating now before the men in white coats try and get me Torture VVVVVV BAD.

J.LO: But I get to do that anyway! I think I'll stick to being a superstar singer! The pay is way better!

AUTHORS: -Snort- Yeah right!

J.LO: -Glares-

TUCK: Such a pity! Anyway now that you have defeated me I have a gift for you. It is the spell water.

CLA: -Cracks whip- Write it down now! –Pens scribble furiously-

TUCK: Also you have a choice of items. These are a bottle of wine or an empty crystal vial trimmed with gold.

M.G: Relatively simple and normal this time!

SPA: You always have to include alcohol don't you!

M.G: No…. And who says she'll pick the wine. –Pulls tongue-

J.LO: I'll take the wine!

ALL: -Slap foreheads-

SPA: You were saying?

M.G: And again I quote. Be quiet you!

TUCK: Right my job is done! Farewell dungeoneer! –Walks off screen-

J.LO: Okay so where do I go?

GAR: Walk straight forward.

-J.Lo walks forward through the door-

J.LO: Where am I?

GAR: You're in a room. It looks like a throne room! There is a door either side of the throne and in front of you is some food.

CLA: First things first. Pick up the food.

-J.Lo picks up the food, which is some mouldy fruit-

J.LO: Why does everything on this show have to be mouldy!

M.G: Um, because it has been waiting around for you to get there?

J.LO: Your fanfic authors can't you make so it lasts longer!

SPA: Um, no. We can fix some things. But that is going against the laws of nature!

J.LO: You know you talk utter crap sometimes.

SPA: We know and to be perfectly honest we don't actually care.

M.G: Mmmhmmm –Nods in agreement-

J.LO: Bloody Bitches!

ALL: Amen to that!

AUTHORS: -Sulk-

J.LO: Pathetic. Okay losers where am I going?

CLA: Hey bum for brains less of the loser talk!

GAR/ CHR: YEAH!

J.LO: Yeah okay, where am I going?

GAR: Take two side steps to your right and walk forward.

-J.Lo takes two side steps and walks forward…. Straight into a wall-

J.LO:

M.G: Ow my ears!

TRIO: -Laugh hysterically-

SPA: Guys not funny….. Ah who am I kidding! –Laughs-

J.LO: You guys are all a load of evil –Bell gongs and J.Lo freezes-

M.G: Okay guys and gals time for you to go sleepies!

TRIO: Noooooooooo!

M.G: Treguard if you please!

TRE: Yes mam!

-Treguard does a good old fashioned square dance and they freeze-

M.G: Groovy. That was good timing on behalf of the bell I thought I would have had to bleep another line.

SPA: Yeah, we seem to be doing it far too much!

M.G: Ah who cares…. It's all fun.

SPA: True! Right are we off?

M.G: Yup we're done! Lets go!

TRE: Huh? Where are you going!

M.G: It's Sparrow's Birthday and we're off out!

SPA: Yeah so seeya!

TRE: What about me?

PIC: Well you've got me M'Lord.

TRE: Like that's any consolation!

And so we leave this scene once again not getting very far –Sigh- Hopefully that will be resolved next time because Dun-dun-dunnnnn Sparrow is writing the next chapter whether she likes it or not! And is being given free reign to do whatever the hell she wants! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Be prepared for chaos and much, much more in the next chapter of Dayknightmare!