Lord of the Rings: Middle Earth High
Summary: Merry and Pippin troublemakers, Aragorn and Arwen going to the prom, Legolas, Faramir and Éowyn in drama club, Boromir and Éomer football players, and Gandalf a science teacher? It's Middle Earth High, of course!
Disclaimer: Here are some more random facts: Hazelnut cream cheese tastes good. Archery is fun. My cat looks like an Orc. Oh yeah, and I still don't own LOTR.
Chapter 8- Math, Gym, Etcetera…
"Hello, students!" Bilbo said cheerfully. The class groaned. "It's a wonderful day, the sun is shining, and oh! We have six new students, too! Now come to the front, and introduce yourselves!" The new students groaned.
Théodred went first. "Hi, I'm Théodred, son of Théoden, and I live in Edoras, and I, uh, I like to fight orcs, and- stuff."
"Wonderful, wonderful!" Bilbo said. "Next!"
"Hi, I'm Lothíriel, daughter of Imrahil, and I like cheerleading." Lothíriel said.
"Ooooo, cheerleader…" whispered Éomer to Éowyn.
"Shut up…" she replied.
Gimli went next. "I'm Gimli, son of Gloin. DON'T MESS WITH ME, ELF!" Gimli yelled at Legolas.
"Anger management…" Legolas whispered to Aragorn.
"I heard that!" Gimli yelled.
"I'm glad! It's true!" Legolas shouted.
"Oh, speak for yourself!" Gimli replied.
"AHEM!" Goldberry yelled, breaking the argument apart, and leaving both students grumbling in their seats. "Now, I believe it was my turn. I'm Goldberry of the River, and I like archery and sword –play."
"Yeah, girl!" Éowyn shouted and slapped her hand.
Then Tom went. "I'm Tom, son of whoever, and I like fishing and wearing my yellow boots."
"Yellow? Yellow is so last week!" stated Arwen. "But that's alright, it's, like, vintage!"
"Whatever…" Tom said as he took his seat.
"Tell me again; why did you date her, Aragorn?" Faramir whispered.
"I dunno. It's better than dating, Éowyn, for certain!" Aragorn replied.
"Oh, you're just jealous because you couldn't handle a shield maiden, so picked an Elf instead!" Faramir hissed.
"Am not!"
"Am too!"
"Am not!"
"Am-"
"Gentlemen!" Bilbo exclaimed to Aragorn and Faramir, who were unaware that their voices had been growing louder with every "Am !"
And lastly, after Aragorn and Faramir's dispute, there was Haldir. "I'm Haldir, son of- wait! Who are my parents? Do I have parents? I'm an orphan!" Haldir yelled, and with that he returned to his seat sadly.
"Alright, welcome, welcome!" Bilbo said. "Now, today we will be working on algebraic equations. Will anyone volunteer to explain them?" Bilbo asked. No one raised a hand. "Gollum, thank you very much for volunteering!"
"But we didn't volunteer!" Gollum screeched. "WHAT'S ALGEBRAIC EQUATIONS, PRECIOUS? What is it, precious?"
"Well then, everyone just open your books to page 70, read the entire page, then do problems 1-100 on page 72, then the odd numbers of problems 1-76 on page 73, then read page 74, and do ALL 50 problems on page 75." Bilbo intoned as he wrote the assignment on the blackboard.
All the class groaned and muttered things like: "That's not fair!" and "Too many problems!" And Gollum was busy still yelling "WHAT'S ALGEBRAIC EQUATIONS, PRECIOUS? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"Quiet, quiet down, do you want me to make it more?" Bilbo asked. And with that the students went dead quiet and began doing their 188 algebraic equation problems.
&
Then it was time for Gym class with Thranduil. After changing into their gym attire, the students proceeded up to the gym. When they got there, to the horror of Aragorn, Faramir, Éomer, and Boromir, scattered around the gym were tumbling mats, swinging bars, rings, parallel bars, and ropes.
"It's, it's-"
But at that moment, Éomer was interrupted by Thranduil, for he strode into the room said, "Welcome, class, to Gym!" Then, the horrible words were heard: "Today we are starting gymnastics!"
"Yes!" the girls hobbits yelled happily. They were happy for a quieter sport after the last unit of rugby.
"Whatever…" the Elves Legolas, Haldir, Elladan and Elrohir said, not really caring one way or another. They had survived rugby just fine, just dodging out of the way with the girls, while letting Aragorn, Faramir, Éomer, and Boromir do most of the work.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Aragorn, Faramir, Éomer, and Boromir, of the race of Men, yelled as they realized their fate.
"What is it? What's wrong?" Théodred asked.
"Gymnastics," said Aragorn, shuddering as he said it.
"It is the fool of the curriculum," Boromir said.
"You wonder who came up with it," Faramir added.
"But none who venture into that unit, that part of gym class, ever return," Éomer said in a scary voice.
"Has that really ever happened?" asked Théodred.
"IT COULD!" Éomer yelled.
"Éomer, stop threatening your classmates. Gymnastics is harmless," Thranduil said. "Now, I know some of you may not like gymnastics," he said, while furtively glancing at the boys, "and you may find this unit difficult..."
"Or boring," Faramir whispered.
"Or annoying," Aragorn continued.
"Or embarrassing," Éomer added.
"Or-"
"That is enough! Aragorn, Faramir, Éomer, Boromir, if you make one more peep, then I will send you to Gandalf!"
And the four boys shut up really fast.
"Now. I'd like a volunteer for the backflip. Gollum, how about you?" Thranduil asked.
"WE DIDN'T VOLUNTEER! Why is they always picking on us, precious? WHY? WHY?! It isn't fair to us! Not at all! AHHHHHHHHHH!" And then he, once again, ran out of the room screaming.
"That's the 3rd time this week," Thranduil said. "And it's only Tuesday! Elrohir, go press the red button on the wall," he said as Elrohir went to follow said command.
When the voice of Gríma came on the speakers, Thranduil said, "Yes, Gríma, it's Gollum, he-" Thranduil was cut off, because the announcement was quite familiar, and Gríma knew precisely what to do.
"Alright then, now that our first 'volunteer' is rampaging throughout the school, who'll go next?" Thranduil asked. "How about you, Aragorn, since you are so avidly involved in gymnastics?"
Aragorn looked around nervously. He couldn't even do a handstand, let alone a backflip! "Uh, we didn't volunteer?" he said nervously.
"Nice try! Now get on that mat and try to demonstrate a backflip, or you'll fail this class!"
"Ok…" said Aragorn uneasily as he walked onto the mat. He placed his hands on the mat, kicked up his legs, started to flip… and landed flat on his back, with the entire class as witness. Aragorn got up to face the degrading laughter of his classmates, and sadly walked back to his place in line.
"Anyone else want to try?" Thranduil asked. "How about a Hobbit? How about Frodo?" he asked.
"Me?" Frodo asked, surprised.
"I don't see any other Frodo around here," Thanduil answered. "Come try a backflip!"
"Go on, Frodo!" encouraged Merry.
"Well, alright," Frodo said nervously. He walked up to the mat, and quick as a flash, sprung down the mat, flipping five times before landing on just the edge of the mat and sticking it. After performing this feat, he was praised with much applause from all the students.
"Never in over 1,000 years have I seen a Halfling perform such a feat! Wonderful job, Frodo! You undoubtedly get an A!" Thranduil exclaimed. "Now, would anone else like to try the backflip of doom?"
A/N: I had to give Arwen a preppy moment there: "'That is so last week! But that's alright, it's vintage!'" He he he!
As some of you may have noticed, the girl Lothíriel is in this chapter. "How did she get here?" you ask? Well, due to reviewer requests, and the new "export text" thingy the fanfiction people have added, I added in a section about Lothíriel in the last chapter. "Who is she?" you wonder? She was daughter of Prince Imrahil (who is not really really important, and will not be discussed for fear of a very very long explanation), and she married Éomer at the end of ROTK. Another girl! Yay! Please go read Chapter 7 again in its entirety, to get another good laugh and understand Lothíriel's appearance.
Oh yeah, I'd like to credit GoldenFaielf (once again!) for the idea of Frodo doing his backflip in gym! LUV YA!!!
By the way, I GOT THE ROTK EXTENDED EDITION!!! Go me! ROTK is now over 3 hours long, but I watched it all! Buahahahahaha! I love it! But anyways, here's my gift to you. New chapter! Please review! Shoutouts will be next chappie, as my dad is nagging me to "Get to bed already!" Love yall! See you later!