"That was nice," Boone said.
"Nice? You told me nice was a word your mother would use," Jack replied.
"Okay, it was dirty and wrong," Boone corrected.
He saw Jack smile. "That's more like it," he said.
Boone loved Jack's smile and Jack didn't smile nearly as much as he should. In fact Jack could be overall too serious for his own good. But then Jack had a pretty responsible job when it came down to it. Boone knew all about pressure, if he screwed up, he tended to take a couple's most special day with him. But then, that hardly compared to Jack. If he put his scalpel a little too far to the left he paralysed someone for the rest of their lives. That was probably worse, Boone reasoned. God, he needed to get a new job. Well, first he had to work out what the hell it was he wanted to do. Actually, first he had to tell Sabrina he was quitting the job he had.
He moved over slightly and put his head on Jack's chest, listening to the little ba-dum, ba-dum, ba-dum. His heartbeat had pretty much calmed down to normal again now.
"What are you doing?" Jack asked.
"I can hear your heartbeat," Boone explained.
"Well, good," Jack said. "That means I'm alive."
"Wow, you're a really good doctor," Boone replied sarcastically.
"Mmm," Jack hummed.
"Hey, Jack?" Boone asked, angling his head upwards to look him in the face.
"Uh-huh?" Jack asked, seeming to drift off someplace.
"What do you think you'd be doing if you weren't a doctor?" Boone queried.
Jack looked amused. He opened his eyes slightly to look at Boone. "I don't know, Boone," he said. "Maybe I'd be a pastry chef or something," he shrugged.
"Pastry chef?" Boone asked, a little confused.
"Boone, I'm sleepy, I can't think about things like that right now," Jack whined. Well, it sounded like a whine to Boone anyway.
"You're sleepy?" Boone asked.
"Yeah. Jack sleepy," Jack replied, closing his eyes.
"I thought you didn't sleep anymore," Boone pointed out.
"Well, I think we found something that puts me to sleep," Jack responded.
"In a good way, right?" Boone asked, a little nervous.
Jack smiled. "Yes, in a good way."
"Well," Boone grinned, "I guess we'll just have to do that every night then."
"Oh, believe me, we're gonna be doing that a whole lot more often," Jack assured him. "I'm sorry about the dry spell and everything being so up in the air lately."
"Jack, stop it, you don't have to tell me you're sorry," Boone said. "You don't owe me anything, okay?"
Jack looked him in the eye. "Boone, I didn't do that because I think I owe you. I did it because you're my boyfriend and you're hot and it happens that I haven't noticed that over the past few weeks for whatever reason."
"You know that you could have the whole world, right?" Boone stated. He felt it was only fair that he pointed that out to Jack as Jack, it seemed, could be a little slow on the uptake.
"Boone, what are you talking about?" Jack asked, clearly not getting it.
"Well, it's like, you're a doctor, and not just a doctor, you're a spinal surgeon, which is even more impressive, and you're this hero guy, you're a leader, and you keep a cool head, well, in most situations, and you know what you want so I wanted you to know that you can have what you want, don't let me stop you," Boone rambled on. "I mean, you're not even gay."
"Neither are you," Jack countered.
"I'm more gay than you are," Boone replied.
"Oh, are we having a gayness competition now?" Jack asked light-heartedly.
Boone just stared at him. He so wasn't in the mood for this. And then he suddenly realised what he was doing. He was ruining a special moment with Jack for no apparent reason. He'd been moaning and worrying about the fact that they hadn't had sex post-island and now here he was, basking in all the after-sex loveliness, and he was picking a fight. God, he was such an idiot.
"What's all this about?" Jack asked.
"I don't know," Boone said, wondering why exactly he felt some subconscious need to wreck everything good that ever happened to him. "I just want to know that you know that you have other options," he explained.
"I know," Jack replied. "You seriously think for a second that I'm with you because I have to be? You think this is the easy option? Do you know how much shit I get at work for dating you? Everyone there knows Sarah and now they see me with you, you think that's easy? Boone, nothing about this is easy," Jack stated.
Good one, Boone, he thought, you just destroyed the best thing that ever happened to you. You're never gonna be happy again for a single day for the rest of your life. You will be a shell of a human being.
"But you know what," Jack said. "I think you're worth fighting for."
Boone looked up at him, gauging his face. He seemed serious enough. There was no smirk, no maliciousness. Then Jack looked down to meet Boone's eyes.
"I can only hope that you feel the same way," Jack said.
Boone smiled. "Why do you even bother?" he asked, glad that he did but a little confused. "I'm impossible. People go on about Shannon being a brat, look at the way I go around acting. I think I might just be certifiably insane."
"You're not insane," Jack assured him. "Trust me, it just feels that way. You have a couple of issues, especially involving trust and self worth, but you know what, I am going to be right here to work through them with you. And when you feel ready to tell me those stories that affected your life, I am gonna be all ears," Jack insisted.
Boone mentally beat himself up one more time for being the biggest loser ever and then settled back down, resting his head once again on Jack's chest.
"So can I have my nap now?" Jack asked.
"You can do whatever you want," Boone replied with a contented smile as he closed his eyes.
Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Ba-dum.