"My Sassy Princess"
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the copyright of Star Wars.
SUMMARY: Han goes home to the apartelle the next day and he and Leia fought again. (Han, you're so mean!)
CHAPTER XV-"I've Fallen For You!"
Luke, Leia and Chewie boarded a taxicab back to the apartelle. During the ride, Leia sat next to Luke and Chewie was in the front seat. For the first time, Leia's feelings of embarrassment over going to a bar and being kissed by a guy she barely knew sank in. She felt regretful, pathetic, and sorry for herself. What would Han think about me? She thought as the tears flowed down from her brown eyes. She caught her reflection in the window and realized that she forgot to wipe away the smeared lipstick stains across her cheeks. She didn't bothered anymore to grab her handkerchief from her handbag; instead, she wiped it off with the tips of her fingers.
Luke turned his head to check if she was all right. "Are you feeling well, Leia?" he asked.
Leia gazed at him with her teary eyes and couldn't control herself no longer. Right at that moment, she burst into pitiful sobs. As always, Luke allowed her to rest on his shoulder, and he stroked her head as she sobbed, while intently listening to her anguish.
"Luke..." she said in between sobs, "I'm...so...stupid... for acting this way. What would Han say to me? I don't want him to think of me as a cheap person..."
"No one wanted this to happen. It's okay." Luke replied soothingly. He felt grateful to be with Leia during her lowest moments, to have a chance to comfort her in her pain, although he was not the type who would take advantage of her. Even though he was intensely crushing on her (which guy won't want to have his crush resting on his shoulder?), he respected her still. Deep inside, Luke felt guilty to be having these feelings for her. He felt it was not right to be crushing on her, and he'd always know that they could never be more than friends. He knows she loves Han, although she would never show it. Leia was the sister he never had. Maybe, he thought, I'm only feeling brotherly love for her.
Not a word was said to each other during the rest of the trip. Leia had stopped crying, and Luke still allowed her to rest on his shoulder. He caught a whiff of her perfume as he gently stroked her curly hair, which was tied back in a high ponytail. I love you too, Princess, he thought. But it's only superficial love. We're only meant to be as friends, and I accept that we can never be more than that. He, too, was having a hard time figuring out his feelings when he first realized this, but now, he had a clear sense of his values. I love you as the sister I never got to have.
The taxicab stopped in front of the apartelle. Chewie went out first, and Luke handed the payment to the driver. He gently nudged Leia, saying, "We're home," but Leia just plopped down on his lap. She passed out because of her drunken state, he thought. Luke went out of the cab first. He knelt down and placed her arms around his neck, then carried her on his back all the way to their pad.
When they arrived at Leia's room, Luke carefully lay her down on her bed. He removed her high-heeled sandals and placed them nearby before tucking her into the covers. He pulled a seat and sat at her side, and watched her sleep. Chewie grunted from behind, giving him dagger looks, and he understood what he meant. "Don't worry, friend," Luke said smilingly. "I won't take away her highness from Han. I know they love each other very much, but they're too afraid to show it, because of their inhibitions."
Chewie nodded his head and understood the fact that Luke had no hidden agenda with the way he showed kindness to Leia. In his language, he asked Luke if he would stay.
"I'll keep watch over her. I hope that's okay with you."
Chewie nodded his head in approval, and left.
Luke tried his best to be awake as he kept vigil over the sleeping princess, until he felt his eyes growing heavy. Soon, he too, had fallen asleep at the side of her bed.
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The next morning, Han was finally freed from his detention. He arrived at the apartelle and the first thing he did was to find Leia. He thought of going to her room, and sure enough, she was peacefully asleep on her bed. That gave him relief. But when he saw Luke asleep at the side of her bed, he felt his jealousy growing stronger once again.
Luke stirred in his seat and woke up. He rubbed his eyes, and caught Han standing by the door, glaring at him. Han motioned for him to come, as if wanting to say something. When he stood up and approached Han, the first thing he said to Luke was, "I want to talk to you."
Both went outside the room and stood by the corridor. Luke knew that Han was jealous with him, and he felt the urge to ask him. But he didn't want to offend Han, who was still in a foul mood from last night's fiasco, so he tried to be polite instead. "I brought her home, because she was drunk, and I hope you didn't mind it," Luke said in a low voice.
"And so, you liked it, huh?" Han shot back, his voice tinged with jealousy. "I know how much you enjoy having her all to yourself, since you get to stay close next to her and have her cry on your shoulder."
"It's not what you've been thinking..."
"But what do you call that?" Han asked Luke angrily, trying to keep his voice toned down, even though he felt like shouting at Luke that very moment and punching him. "I know you like her too."
"Han, I only liked her as a friend, and I can never go far beyond than that," Luke replied. "Why are you so mean to her? You kept on saying that you don't like her, that she's not your type, but why are you so jealous every time we're alone together? How long are you going to continue treating her that way?"
Han was dumbstruck. He now knew that Luke had an idea that he was treating Leia shabbily. She must have told Luke everything. He tried saying something, but he was at a lost for words.
"Why can't you speak there, huh?" Luke asked. "Maybe you realized that she's the most important person for you. You don't like her, but you love her. So much. If I were you, I..."
Han grabbed Luke by his collar, not wanting to hear him speak further. "Would you just shut up!" he asked aloud. He couldn't take anymore the truth, coming from Luke, and saying it right into his face.
Luke broke away from Han's grip. He looked at him piercingly. He was getting annoyed with Han and his hot temper. It was making his blood boil. He turned to leave, and left a parting word for him. "If you're thinking that Leia and I are an item, you're very wrong in doing so. Han, she loves you." Then, he left.
Han became even more dumbstruck. She loves you. Part of him wanted to believe it, but another part of him, his inhibitions, won't want to. It ruled over him. Maybe Luke said that to make me feel better. I guess Leia liked him, after all, and he's trying to deny it. Maybe they're even an item, now, and they're keeping it a secret, he thought with angst.
"Luke, where are you?" Han heard Leia ask. She had awakened from her sleep. Hearing this made his blood reach the highest boiling point. Han turned around and saw Leia, who walked barefoot, and still garbed in that attention-calling tube top and asymmetrical mini-skirt. Her once-neatly pony tailed hair was in a mess, strands hanging down from the side of her face.
"Oh, Han, it's you," Leia said in a low voice. She tried to smile at him, saying, "I hope you're okay. I'm sorry for what had happened last night, and..."
Han cut her off. He looked at her angrily and said, "Take that thing off, won't you?"
"What?" she asked confusingly. She could still feel her head ache from her hangover.
"Why are you wearing those things? It makes you look like a whore! Go dress up in something else!" Han stormed off to the living room, and Leia followed him.
"What did you said?" Leia asked again.
"You nerf-brain, I said that you change in other clothes because you look like a prostitute in those things!" Han said angrily.
Leia felt insulted at what he said. "What do you care if I look like a prostitute? I have the right to dress up any way I want to! And don't I have a right to go out at night? Why, you go out there too, isn't it?"
"What gives you the idea to dress up like that and go out at night?" Han asked, shouting.
"Why is the way I dress up becoming an issue?" Leia shot back.
"You...look...so cheap in those." Han said carefully, as if trying to get into her head what he just said. "People think you're a whore or some call girl, and looked what happened! Some maniac molested you and kissed you!"
"Han, I never expected that would happen, and..."
"And you liked that experience, huh?"
"Why are you saying those things to me!" Leia exclaimed. "Why do you think of me that way? I just want to have fun!"
"And have fun, you will!"
"Stop acting like you're my mother!"
"Your parents probably brought you up shabbily, that's why you're acting as if you don't give a damn to other people around you!"
"Don't you insult my parents that way!" Leia exclaimed angrily as she went up to Han and slapped his cheek. She hated it when somebody insults her deceased parents, more so if from people who never really knew them.
"Ah, you're fighting back now!" Han exclaimed sarcastically. "You don't even try to see that I'm just concerned with you!"
"Concerned? Concerned with me? Hah!" Leia let out a slight, yet very annoyed laugh. "You keep telling me that I'm a nerf-brain, whore, call girl, prostitute, and you call that concerned? Han, I'm so sick of you!" Leia cried out as she stormed away from him. Han followed her and grabbed her by the arm, making her turn to him. He looked at her intently, and by that time, Leia was on the verge of tears. Still, she tried to blink back her sobs.
"Your highness, I'm also very sick of being with you!" Han hissed.
"Let go of me!" Leia cried, as she broke free from Han. She was now full to the brim. She knows that she loves him, but now, her angst and anguish were taking over her. How could you be so insensitive?
She felt her tears fill up her eyes. She had her back faced on Han, and with her trembling shoulders, Han knew that she was offended with the things he said and was crying. Han placed his hand on her shoulder and tried to apologize, but Leia shoved him off.
"Your highness, I'm sorry if..."
"Sorry, sorry, sorry!" Leia exclaimed as she turned to face Han, her tears visibly streaming down her cheeks. "Sorry's just an empty word! Why are you hurting me this way! Don't you know how hard it is to have these feelings for you!"
"I didn't know that what I was doing was hurtful and..." Han mumbled, trying to fill up the void.
"You're so insensitive, don't you know that! I hate you for making me feel this way! For being so mean to me, that is! And I never wanted this to happen, but I just can't help myself! Yes, you're right! I am a nerf-brain! I know you're angry with me, but you know what, I never dreamed of kissing any other guy except you!" Then Leia burst into sad, loud sobs, and covered her face with her hands.
She felt very angry with Han with his mean kind of treatment towards her. Yet, she still loved him despite of that. It made her sick, but she had no choice but to face up to the truth. She removed her hands from her face, and with all the courage she could muster, she told him, despite her tears, "The moment...that I'm afraid of to happen... has finally come true. Han... I've fallen...for you. But you will never catch me." Then Leia turned away and ran, crying.
Han just stood by in silence, not knowing what to do or what to think of. She's right. I'm so mean to her, he thought regretfully. I should have chosen my words carefully. But, even I myself don't know what to do! You're insensitive too, don't you know that? How long are we going to go on hurting each other?
I never dreamed of kissing any other guy except you! Those words were still echoing in his head. Han smiled, albeit a bittersweet one. I've fallen for you, but I'm also afraid you might not catch me. He clenched his fists in angst, uncertain whether he should pursue his love or not. But now that I've heard the truth from you, I know you're serious. Still, a princess and a smuggler like me can never be together. You deserve someone else. I'm so mean to you. You don't deserve me.
Inside the room, Leia was still crying.
You'll never be able to catch me, Han.
Will they end up in each other's arms?
A/N: This is the question Han and Leia were thinking about in this chapter. The next chapter will be events from the movie "Empire Strikes Back" (in Hoth), and with that, the continuation of their up and down love story. Don't worry readers, I assure you that THEY WILL END UP TOGETHER! (Yay!) How will that happen, the next chapters will answer. So give me your reviews please, and stay tuned!