Author's notes: Just so you know, I'm listening to Gerard Butler sing "No One Would Listen" as I'm writing this, so I have plenty of inspiration. :-P It's a wonderful song, be sure to search the net for it, the lyrics are very touching and made me remember the wonderful parts of "Phantom" – Erik's monologues.
Enrinye – I thought so. Well, you know what I think of Le Fop, but I'll try to describe him as well as I can. "Dancing Queen"? (bursts out laughing) Listening to too much ABBA, are we? Or maybe… McEric & Barbara? (laughs again) I hated those two…
lady kathrin – thank you, here you go!
starnat – I think that at her grave, seeing the rose, he finally realized that he stood in the way of true love and accepted the fact they belonged together. That was what I liked about Kay's book, actually – Raoul understood this and accepted it.
Daisy Deertree – I'll get there, don't worry. Read on!
EriksIngenue – Heh, here you go. I think I'm getting the hang of Christine now, don't ya think? P.S. That was a great description of Le Fop!
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Chapter 5 – Beyond the Mirror
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The gala was a triumph in every sense of the word.
Again, I sang only for the Angel, thinking of him the whole time. To me, the Opera House was empty that night, only one pair of eyes watching me, one voice silently guiding me. I was deaf to all other sounds, blind to all other sights… only when it was time to take my bows did I regain my senses.
That night, I hoped more than ever that he would have reason to be proud of me.
I hurried to the chapel straight after the curtain fell – I disliked crowds and I was unused to so many people shouting my name and trying to bring me flowers. I knelt in front of the candles, the glass angel and the picture of my father.
At last, I have fulfilled my promise to you, Papa. I thought, smiling. You have sent me the Angel of Music… and tonight, I sang in front of the world.
Bravi, bravi, bravissimi… the wind whispered to me. My gaze rose, my smile directed at the invisible Angel that was in the room with me.
"Christine, Christine!"
Christine…But as I turned around, sensing another presence, I saw only Meg, now dressed in her ballet practice outfit, rushing to me, beaming. I smiled at her, hiding my disappointment.
"Where in the world have you been hiding?" she demanded, and I had to laugh silently. Dear, sweet, Meg. "Really, you were perfect! I only wish I knew your secret – who is this new tutor?" Her question, simple, was something I was unprepared for.
"Meg..." What was I supposed to say but the truth? "When your mother brought me here to live, whenever I came here to light a candle for my father… a voice… from above…" it was hard to explain this to her – she had surely forgotten my stories of the Angel of Music.
It seemed so, judging by her concerned glance. "Christine…" she swallowed, "Do you really believe? Do you really believe that the spirit of your father is coaching you?"
Did I really? "Who else, Meg? Who else? I have told you the story of the Angel of Music once, Meg… the Angel that would guide children's voices to greatness." I glanced at the glassy Angel to my left. "I believe in my Angel. I cannot see him, but… I simply know he's here, always with me, all around me. Calling me softly, somewhere inside, hiding."
We left the chapel together, Meg still muttering to herself who could this Angel of mine possibly be. My hand brushed against her accidentally, but she grasped it firmly in an instance and gasped.
"Your hands are cold!" I looked down, but she raised my chin with her hand, "Your face, Christine – it's white!"
"It frightens me…" I whispered.
"Don't be frightened…" Meg said soothingly, "Perhaps you should go to your dressing room and change – I'll go undo your bed. You need a good night's sleep, you're probably just exhausted and already dreaming." Before I could object, she ran off to the dorms.
I shook my head, but decided it would be a good idea to change. My costume was decorated with setting suns, my hair covered with star-shaped clips. It was exquisite, but the crinoline was a bit heavy (I was used to simple dresses) and the corset was beginning to irritate me.
I slipped into my dressing room, trying to be as subtle as possible. Unfortunately, the crowds noticed me quickly, since they were all trying to get to me, and it took all of Madame Giry´s strength to lock them out of my dressing room. I could still hear her shouting "No!" at them, even as she managed to get the door closed.
She then came to me, smiling motherly. "You did well, my dear." Seemingly from nowhere, she produced a rose. "He is pleased with you." Only then did I notice the black satin ribbon around it… I turned to ask Madame Giry how she got it, but she was already gone.
I sat down at my vanity table, admiring the rose from every angle. Perfectly flawless, as usual, the ribbon tied around it neatly, there couldn't be any doubt that it was the signature sign of my Angel. I had just begun debating with myself if it was another slight similarity between the Angel and the Phantom, the same messenger – Madame Giry – when I heard a distantly familiar voice.
"Little Lotte let her mind wander." I glanced up, seeing none other than Raoul at the door, with a large bouquet of flowers. I quickly hid the blood red rose – I didn't want him to see it. "Little Lotte thought, am I fonder of dolls or of goblins or shoes?"
"Raoul…" I said, a smile forming on my face.
"Or of riddles or frocks?"
"Those picnics in the attic…" Memories were returning.
"Or of chocolates?" He finished, crouching next to me, smiling as well.
"No, what I love best, Lotte said," This was my favorite part of the story, the part that made me wish I was Lotte. It was the reason I was nicknamed Lotte. "…is when I'm asleep in my bed. And the Angel of Music sings songs in my head."
Raoul chuckled and we repeated the last line together, singsong voices in perfect harmony. Then, he embraced me lovingly. "You sang like an angel tonight."
I had to correct him. "When my father lay dying, he said: When I'm in Heaven, child, I will send to you the Angel of Music." I paused at the memory, but regained my courage, "Well, my father is dead, Raoul… and I have been visited by the Angel of Music."
Sadness crossed his face at the mention of father's death – he knew well what he meant to me – but at the mention of the Angel, he nodded instantly, "Oh, no doubt of it! And now, we go to supper!"
"No, Raoul." Panic was finding its way into my voice quickly. If the Angel would hear… if the Angel would see… "The Angel of Music is very strict."
But he merely laughed. I knew most people would not believe in the Angel, but this worried me. He thought I was joking! "Well, I shan´t keep you up late! Two minutes – Little Lotte." He said with a charming smile and quickly closed the door behind him.
"Raoul, wait!" It was too late. He was gone and my doom was sealed. The Angel said he would never keep me out of his sight… I didn't dare think what would happen now.
I looked around, as if expecting a blow in the face. But not even a sound disturbed the silence. Sighing, I decided to change into my nightgown. Perhaps silence was the punishment the Angel had prepared for me. But I was getting drowsy – I would have to face my fate tomorrow.
Then a harsh wind blew the candles out. I spun around in an instant, watching the smoke. I should have recognized this as a warning sign. But nothing could have prepared me for the pure venom that reached my ears.
Insolent boy
This slave of fashion
Basking in your glory!
I winced at the mere sound – his voice was skilled in anger and hatred when situation required it, just as it was skilled in softness and enchantment. I feared this sudden change. But it was understandable – I didn't send Raoul away when I should have.
Ignorant fool
This brave young suitor
Sharing in my triumph!
I almost stopped breathing. It was as if he were singing a song, even when he was cursing someone to Hell. The pitch was simply flawless, the subconscious melody entrancing.
Angel, I hear you!
Speak – I listen!
Stay by my side
Guide me
I received no response to my desperate plea, so I knew I had to continue. His silence was torture beyond anything physical.
"Angel, my soul was weak! Please forgive me! Please…" my voice faded into silence, "I ask you, beg you… give me one final chance. Please come to me, Angel. I need you now, more than ever."
He promised me to show himself soon. Unworthy as I was, I knew that if he would disappear forever, without showing himself to me once, I would die of despair and a broken heart. I needed to earn his trust now, by whatever means.
"Flattering child… you shall know me, then." I had never heard his voice sound so uncertain, so… human. But it regained its commanding nature all-too-quickly. "You shall see why in shadow I hide. Look at your face in the mirror, Christine. Look closely."
I did as he asked, strange as it sounded. And as I thought that I saw only the room I was in any my own reflection, a towering dark figure began to take shape, seemingly out of nowhere.
I am there, inside!
There was no mistaking the fact that now, the voice didn't seem as ethereal as before, in the sense that it wasn't coming from above anymore, but it lost none of its divine purity. It was coming from the mirror.
Entranced, spellbound, I walked to the mirror, the many times I had called for him echoing in my mind.
Angel of Music
Guide and guardian
Grant to me your glory!
Angel of Music
Hide no longer!
Come to me, strange Angel!
As I stood there, facing him, I couldn't tear my gaze from the burning flames of his eyes, only vaguely noticing that the right half of his face was covered by an ivory mask. His hair as black as ink, he was dressed in the very same color from head to toe, the magnificent cape creating the illusion of wings. His skin was as pale as the moonlight and his face made me think that it was not an Angel, but God Himself that stood in front of me, with His hand outstretched, beckoning me closer.
I am your Angel…
Come to me, Angel of Music…
I am your Angel of Music…
Come to me, Angel of Music…
Disobedience was out of the question. I took his hand, a firm but not fierce grip tightening on it. He smiled slightly, gently pulling me closer to him, leading me away from the world of daylight.