Okay, this is the point where things start to heat up, so those of you who had made it this far, congratulations.
I want to restate that some characters (namely Goku, Krillian, Piccolo, Yamcha, Tien, and Choutsu) are going to be out of character here. There will be drinking, drug use, strong sexual content, swearing, and violence. If you cannot handle that, then why are you reading a rated R fanfic? For those of you who don't care, then I'm sure you'll enjoy the story.
Oh, and one more thing. One of my reviewers pleaded with me to not have Master Roshi and Oolong do anything to the ladies. Silly reviewer. Don't you know that ANYTHING that those two try to do involving sex is automatically doomed to failure.
It's time to pity Gohan!
"Chapter 4: The Taste of Beer, and Other Lessons Learned"
Chichi, Bulma, and #18 were all gathered outside of Mr. Satan's house, carry several bags and boxes. The three women also had Trunks, Goten, and Marron with them as well. Bulma rung the door bell. It was soon answered by a butler.
"How may I help you ladies?" asked the butler.
"We're here to have our party with Videl," said Bulma. "Is she still home?"
"Ah, yes," said the butler. "I was already informed that you were coming. Please come in."
The ladies and the children entered the house. They were met by some other servant who gladly took the bag and boxes away from the ladies. Shortly afterward, Mr. Satan walk down the stairs to greet them. "Oh hey ladies! Welcome to my home. Videl already told me about the party and all. It's fine with me as long as it not too hectic."
"Don't worry, Mr. Satan," said Bulma. "I'm sure things won't get too bad."
"That's good," said Mr. Satan. "Videl's getting ready, so she should be down in a sec. By the way, why are your kids here?"
Bulma rolled her eyes. "It's a long story. Let's just say that our husbands didn't want to be bothered with them."
"Oh," said Mr. Satan as he scratched his head. "What do you want me to do with them?"
#18 walk up placed a hand on Mr. Satan's shoulder. "We were hoping that you could take care of them for a while. That won't be an issue, will it?" She then gripped tightly on his shoulder, reminding the "World's Champion" of her considerable strength.
Mr. Satan swallowed nervously. "Nope…not a problem."
Videl appeared from upstairs. "Hi everyone! Glad you could make it!"
"The pleasure's all ours," said Bulma. "I'm just glad it was okay for us to have it here. I wanted it at my place, but you know Vegeta. He probably would've blown up the whole house if I hadn't given in. No matter. He's been sleeping on the couch ever since."
"Don't worry about it," said Videl before noticing the children. "Uh…Hi, kids…"
"Hi, Videl!" said both Trunks and Goten excitedly. Marron waved back as well.
"Is it okay for them to be here?" asked Videl.
"Don't worry," said #18. "You're father's going to watch over them for us."
Trunks pouted to his mother. "Aw, mom. Can't I stay for the party? Please?"
"No Trunks," said Bulma. "Now you be good and stay with Mr. Satan."
Trunks was down about not joining the party. "Fine, mom…"
"Uh…I have a game room you can play in," said Mr. Satan. "And I'm sure Buu and Bee would love to play with ya."
Trunks's face brightened when hearing that, along with Goten and Marron. "Alright!"
"Follow me," said Mr. Satan as he walked off, the children following suit.
With the children gone, Videl showed the ladies to the way to the living room. "Follow me. I already told my servants to take your stuff to the living room.
With that, the girl's party began…
Meanwhile, the bachelor party was also about to start. By now, all the guys, which included Gohan, Goku, Vegeta, Krillian, Piccolo, Yamcha, Tien, and Choutsu, had arrived.
Piccolo walked up to Gohan to greet him. "Hello, Gohan."
"Hey, Piccolo," said Gohan. "Fancy meeting you here. Didn't think you were the partying type."
"I'm not," said Piccolo as he leaned next to Gohan to whisper in her ear. "I'm here to back you up and keep you out of trouble."
"Thanks, Piccolo," said Gohan. "I have a feeling I'm going to need all the help I can get." Gohan's focus then turned to the alcohol. As was mentioned earlier, there was twelve containers of different kinds. It included five crates, one whiskey, one rum, one gin, one vodka, and one tequila. The seven kegs contain different ales, lagers, and beers. It was an astounding about of alcohol. "There's enough alcohol here to get a whole town drunk."
Goku happened to be passing by as Gohan said this. "I guess it will have to do."
Gohan responded by giving a strange look. "Have to do? Just how much are you going to drink anyway?"
Goku thought about the question. "I don't know. Depends I guess."
"Depends on what?" asked Gohan.
Goku continued to think. "…I don't know…"
"What do you mean you don't know!" asked Gohan in astonishment.
Goku scratched the back of his head. "Well to be honest, I don't know how much I can drink. I always black out before I finish."
Gohan responds by slapping his forehead. "I can't believe I'm hearing this."
Goku points his thumb toward one of the kegs. "Hey Gohan. Why don't you have a beer with me before the cake come out?"
'Cake?' thought Gohan when hearing his father. 'Oh man, I really hope that it's just a cake and not one of those really big cake where a woman jumps out. That'd be just what I need.'
"Well, son?" asked Goku.
"Okay, Dad," agreed Gohan reluctantly. He then took a seat on a bar stool while his father went to get the beer. He took a look around the room to get a good idea of what was going on. Piccolo was sitting on the couch minding his own business. Krillian and Yamcha were trying to get the stupid radio to work. Tien and Choutsu were fighting over a bottle whiskey. And Vegeta was downing a bottle of Tequila.
Goku then arrived with three mugs of beer. "Here you go."
As Gohan took one the mugs, he eye curiously at the other two. "Why'd you get three mugs? There are only two of us."
Before Goku answered, he gulped down both mugs as fast as possible. He spoke after exhaling deeply. "That's the stuff. That should get me started."
Gohan sweat-dropped upon seeing his father drink. "Are you becoming an alcoholic?"
"Nah," said Goku. "Alcoholics go to meetings. Are you going to drink yours or what?"
Gohan stared into the glass full of beer. "I guess it doesn't look to horrifying." He then took a big gulp. After letting his taste buds register, his quickly spat it out. "Yuk! This stuff tastes terrible!"
Goku chuckled. "Yeah, it's kinda an acquired taste."
"I'll say," said Gohan as he looked at his beer again. "This stuff tastes like shit!"
Krillian, who saw Gohan spit out the beer, walked up and joined the conversation. "Well, what do you expect? It's only wheat, oats, and barley mixed with alcohol and water. None of those thing are actually very good tasting."
Goku blinked as he stare at Gohan's beer. "So that's what it's made of…"
Krillian slumped his shoulders at Goku's remark. "You amaze me Goku…"
"Thanks, Krillian," said Goku, completely oblivious to his friend's sarcasm.
"I think I'll finish this later…" said Gohan as be placed the beer on the counter.
Goku noticed that Vegeta had just finished drinking the bottle of tequila. "Hey, Vegeta! Bet you can't eat that worm."
Vegeta looked at Goku smugly before taking the worm and popping it in his mouth like popcorn.
Goku was grossed out. "Eww! That's gross!"
"Oh please, Kakarott," said Vegeta in a display of cockiness. "I've eaten much more disgusting things then that."
"Like what?" asked Goku, his face still disgusted.
Vegeta thought about the question. "Like my wife."
It was Krillian's turn to spit out beer this time. He did all he could to prevent himself from laughing. Gohan on the other hand was completely embarrassed, his face turning a deep shade of crimson.
Goku blinked in surprised. "Bulma? No way. Is it really that bad?"
"Well, let's just say that there is at least one part of her body that's showing her age," said Vegeta with a shudder.
Gohan interrupted. "I can't believe I'm hearing this! That's more information then I cared to know!"
Vegeta smirked at Gohan. "What's wrong, Gohan? Is the subject making you…uncomfortable?"
"No!" yelled Gohan. "I just don't want to think about Bulma that way!"
"Well why don't you tell us about your sexual exploits, Gohan?" asked Krillian.
"No way!" said Gohan. "It's none of your business!"
"Why not?" asked Goku.
"I know why," said Vegeta. "Cause he's Mr. Perfect Husband-to-be."
"Yeah, I'm sure he's 'perfect' alright," joked Krillian.
"Yeah, I'm sure Videl is 'very happy' with Gohan, right?" added Goku before noticing his son's silence. His quickly became concerned. "Uh…Gohan? You and Videl are having sex, right?"
Gohan's silence was a dead giveaway about the truth. Krillian was surprised. "You mean that you're still a virgin?"
Gohan remained silent, too embarrassed to say anything. The other guys look at each other and back at Gohan. They started to snicker at first, but it wasn't long before the snickering soon built up into all out laughter. Krillian stood up on the bar stool and yelled out to the remaining guys. "Hey guys! Gohan's a virgin!" Before long, Yamcha, Tien and Choutsu were laughing, too. The only one's not laughing were Gohan and Piccolo.
Gohan obviously didn't enjoy being laughed at, and he was quickly losing his temper. "STOP IT! STOP LAUGHING! IT'S NOT FUNNY!"
Eventually, everyone calmed down and the laughing died out. Krillian pats Gohan on the shoulder. "So you're saving yourself for marriage?"
"Yes I am!" yelled Gohan, who was still upset. "What's wrong with that?"
"Nothing," said Vegeta. "It's just that we highly doubt that Videl is a virgin."
"She is!" yelled Gohan.
"Yeah right," said Goku. "How would you know?"
It was then that Gohan's face became red again as he tried to explain himself. "Y…you know…I've seen it."
"Seen what?" asked Goku.
"Her…cherry…" said Gohan in awkwardness.
"Oh…" said the other guys in unison.
"So you have done some naughty things together," said Vegeta.
"Well, we were just exploring each others bodies and…" said Gohan before the situation became too awkward and he freaked out. "LISTEN! I'VE HAD ABOUT ENOUGH OF THIS TOPIC! CAN WE DROP IT!"
"Sure, Gohan," said Krillian. "But if I were you, I'd get as much experience as I could before the night of your honeymoon."
Gohan was puzzled. "What do you mean, Krillian?"
"He means that we've invited a few 'lady friends' to the party," said Vegeta. "They'll arrive in about a half hour.
"Lady Friends?" yelled Gohan.
"Relax," said Goku "They're not all for you."
Gohan stared at his father in disbelief. "Dad? You don mean that your going to…" He then saw his father nod his head. "YOU'RE GONNA CHEAT ON MOM!"
"Come on Gohan," said Goku. "I was dead for seven years, you think I could go without that long. Let me tell ya, there are some fine ladies in other world."
Gohan looked to Krillian hoping he would say something. Krillian's answer also surprised him.
"Gohan, remember when I said that being married was the good life?" asked Krillian. "I said that cause married men are chick magnets. There are some women who love married men, and I would be a liar if I said that I haven't taken advantage of some opportunities."
"But, #18 would kill you if she found out," said Gohan.
"I know," said Krillian. "I can't help it. Besides, what she doesn't know won't hurt her."
"What she does know could hurt you more than it can hurt her," said Gohan.
Krillian laid back in his seat. "Ahh. The risks of the high-life."
Gohan then looked at Vegeta for some hope. Vegeta laughed. "Oh please, Gohan. If these two bubbling morons can't be loyal, what makes you think I could?"
Gohan sunk his head. "I don't know…" Gohan then looks to Piccolo. "Come on Piccolo. Help me out here!"
"Sorry Gohan." said Piccolo. "What do I know? I don't even have sex organs."
Gohan slouched in defeat. 'I can't believe these guys. Vegeta, maybe, but not my dad and Krillian.'
Suddenly, Yamcha came out of the kitchen. "CAKES READY GUYS!" Yamcha then pushes a cart holding a Gigantic cake. It had six layers like a wedding cake.
'Oh no, I knew it. There's a lady in there,' thought Gohan. 'And she's gonna jump out and try to seduce me.'
Everybody started singing "Oh He a Jolly Good Fellow" as the cake rolled up. As it was positioned in front of Gohan, everybody went silent. All of a sudden, the cake burst open on top and a tall, well-built man with long blond hair jumped out wearing nothing but a Speedo.
"Alright ladies, who's the lucky gal!" screamed the man.
Gohan took a good look, and realizes who it is. "Sh…Sharpener?"
Sharpener looked at Gohan and recognized him as well. "G...Gohan?" Both him and Gohan had a look of horror in their eyes. "Wh...Where are the ladies? This is a bachelorette party isn't it?" After Gohan shook his head, Sharpener ran terrified back into the kitchen. Soon, everybody in the room is laughing, except for Gohan and Piccolo.
"That's not funny!" yelled Gohan.
Goku was still laughing. "Yeah, it is."
"You should have seen your face," said Vegeta how could keep his composure. "It was classic."
The laughter eventually died down. Gohan was humiliated. He wished Videl was there right now. 'I really hope that the party ends soon. I don't know how much more I can take of all this.'
Goku looked to the others. "Well, that one deserves a smoke. What do you think?"
"I agree," said Krillian. "Let me get out some papers."
Goku took out a bag that contained an ounce of pot and took out a small amount out of it. He handed it to Krillian, who removed the seeds and placed the pot in a rolling paper and proceeded to roll a joint.
"You can't smoke that in here!" yelled Vegeta. "My wife has a nose for that stuff!"
"It's okay," said Goku. "We'll go outside behind the house so nobody can see us."
Gohan suddenly became aware of what they were doing. "THAT'S…..THAT'S MARIJUANA!"
"Wow, genius-boy. Do you want a medal?" asked Vegeta in a highly sarcastic tone.
"You guys can't smoke that!" yelled Gohan.
"Sure we can," said Krillian "Be right back."
"By the way, son," said Goku. "The cake incident was just a joke."
"Yeah, I know…" said Gohan. As of right now, the cake was the least of Gohan's concerns. His own dad was about to smoke pot. He fell silent. This was turning out to be on of the worst nights of his life. And that was saying a lot. As the others walked out, only Gohan and Piccolo remained.
"What's going on, Piccolo?" asked the demi-saiyan.
"I don't know Gohan," said Piccolo. "I'm a little surprised myself."
Gohan couldn't help but think that the night before his wedding was going to be a nightmare, and it was just getting started.
"End Chapter 4"
Man o man, I loved that chapter. I hope you guys liked it too. Leave some reviews to let me know what you think. Thanks.