I don't own YYH or any of it's characters. I only own Mikai, Sotto, Yuzu, and Reijii.

0000000000000-shows a flashback and when you see it again, that means that the flashback is over.

Enjoy!

Six months had past, since everything had happened and in that six months, almost just as much happened. Kuwabara and Reijii now lived together in Kuwabara's house, Hiei and Sotto were now together almost full time unless Sotto was up in Spirit World looking through files to see if Mikai's had come up yet, and Yusuke was growing closer and closer to Yuzu but something was holding him back, and in order to fix it, he had to tell everyone how he felt.

"Hey Kuwabara?" Yusuke asked as the two of them basked in the warm sunlight of a mid summer day.

"What is it Urameshi?" Kuwabara asked, not bothering to open his closed eyes to look at him.

"Can I tell you something? Something really important?"

"Sure."

"I…" He looked up towards the sky. "Really…really like Mikai."

"We all do." Kuwabara sighed, finding it odd that he hadn't heard that name in a while after all no one really said anything about her anymore so that they wouldn't upset Kurama.

"I mean more then a friend."

"What!?" Kuwabara yelled as he sat up and looked at the black haired boy. "What'da mean you like Mikai more then a friend?! I thought you liked Yuzu!"

"I do," Yusuke answered, keeping his eyes looking towards the sky. "But in order to move on with Yuzu, I have to let everyone know how I felt about Mikai too."

"But you can't do that to Kurama!" Kuwabara protested as he jumped up. "That poor guy has been waiting six months for her to come back and there hasn't been one sign of her! Why the hell are you doing this Urameshi?"

"Look." Yusuke growled as he sat up. "When Mikai was gone, all anyone could ever think about was Kurama and how he felt. I knew Mikai for years and disappeared in front of me, no one gave a damn about how I felt! You and her are the only two people who have ever given a rat's ass about me and when I watched her fall it tore my heart out! It's my fault that Mikai is gone! Everything's my fault!"

Kuwabara remained quiet as he listened to Yusuke's outburst, and he discovered that he had been wrong to only think of Kurama. Yusuke too had been hurt by everything that had happened, and Kuwabara didn't even consider that Yusuke might feel guilt for not being able to help Mikai when she needed it the most.

"And," Yusuke continued as he looked away. "I'm sorry I can't help the way I feel but after fighting Mikai, I discovered that I liked her and cared for her."

"Urameshi…" Kwuabara sighed. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Yusuke hissed.

"My outburst. I should have thought about everything you were feeling." He put his head down. "Usually I would rely on Mikai to tell me off if I were hurting your feelings but I guess I have to do it on my own now."

"Thanks for the apology," Yusuke said with a small smile.

"But Urameshi can I ask you one more thing?"

"Sure."

"Do you love her?"

Yusuke looked shocked by that question. He looked away as if he were thinking the question over almost. Did he? It was such a simple question but the answer was so hard. He came to a temporary answer, and figured that it was the best one.

"No…that's too cliché," he answered.

"So," Kuwabara said, starting something new figuring that the old question was too much for Yusuke to think about at the time. "Did she like you?"

"You know," Yusuke said as he began to laugh. "You're the only one who didn't notice that."

"What?" Kuwabara yelled feeling embarrassed. "How the hell was I supposed to know that she had a crush on you!"

"Everyone else did!" Yusuke said as he laughed.

"It's not funny!" Kuwabara yelled. "Damn." He looked away with a slight blush on his face.

Yusuke giggled a bit more before he came back to normal. "Anyway…"

"She never told me that she liked you." Kuwabara said as he looked back at Yusuke.

"She asked me out."

"Really?!"

"And I asked her." Yusuke sighed as he looked back out at the sky. "Even though I already knew what her answer was going to be."

"When did you do that?" Kuwabara asked, feeling odd. Him, Yusuke, and Mikai had always been a trio of some sorts and he just found it odd that they both kept something like this a secret from him. He also found it strange how they had never gone out even though it was now apparent that they both liked each other.

"Back in the Makai."

000000

Yusuke and Mikai were sitting down, both out of breath. Both of them had cuts and bruises on their bodies from all of the training they had been doing and because of everything; they figured that they deserved a break.

"Hey Mikai?" Yusuke asked once he had caught some of his breath back.

"What?" She panted.

"Wanna do something crazy?"

"Sure."

"Let's stay here in the Makai," he asked. "Let's not go back to the Ningenkai. We have everything we need here don't we? Let's stay here…and go out."

Mikai fell onto her back and began to laugh. Yusuke, blinked for a few minutes before he began to do the same. He too fell onto his back and looked up at the large purple sky.

"Why don't you go sneeze that idea out of your head?" Mikai teased as the dirt fell back down around her.

The two were quiet as Mikai realized what Yusuke was doing. He was doing the same thing she had done when she asked Yusuke out so long ago. She smiled as she rolled over to face Yusuke only to see him looking towards the sky.

"You know when I look at you all I see are a bunch of what if's?" she teased.

"You too."

"You know I'm gonna tell you something that's gonna piss you off," Mikai said as she stood up and stretched her arms over her head. "If you would have asked me to go out with you when I first met Kurama, I would have said yes."

"I'll be dammed," Yusuke said as he sat up. He sighed and figured that he'd better get back to what he was doing in the first place. "Can you help me up?"

"Sure."

Mikai reached her hand out, and grabbed Yusuke's arm, and that was when Yusuke realized that he was never going to hold Mikai's hand romantically. Her hand was always going to be there to help him, never to pull him towards him in a passionate embrace. Their fingers were never going to be laced together; instead they would always be closed, helping one another.

"Let's get training," Mikai said with a smile.

Yusuke hopped up and dusted himself off. He stretched his arms over his head and got ready for the next round of fighting they were going to be going through in a few moments.

0000000

"So…I guess you don't love her," Kuwabara said as he looked back at Yusuke.

"No…I don't think I do either."

"I think you should go and tell Kurama about everything," Kuwabara said, remembering the red head. "But I think it took a lot of guts to tell me how you felt but remember to also tell Yuzu how you feel about her."

"Yuzu?" Yusuke repeated.

"Yeah, she likes you." Kuwabara laughed for he couldn't see why women would like someone like Yusuke. "I just don't want you to repeat the same mistake twice ya know by not telling Yuzu everything. Don't lost Yuzu like you lost Mikai."

A small clap of thunder caught their attention and they looked up towards the dark sky. Both of them sighed once more, and Kuwabara turned away.

"I'm going home now okay?"

"Okay." Yusuke smiled. "Tell Reijii I said hi okay?"

"Anything Urameshi," Kuwabara said as he waved his hand in the air, telling Yusuke good-bye in his own way. Yusuke smiled a bit, and then began to walk towards Kurama's house.

Thanks Kuwabara… Yusuke thought as he walked away.

"Good bye Mother," Kurama said gently.

"Be careful Shuuichi!" Shoiri said as she looked at her only red head.

"I will be." Kurama smiled.

His mother, step-father, and little brother were going off to some family reunion near the mountains and Kurama didn't feel very much like attending so he was staying behind to watch the house.

"Bye!" They waved as the train's doors closed, and took off with Kurama's only family in it.

"Good bye," He whispered as he watched.

Kurama was walking home, no aware of the ominous gray clouds above his head. He picked up his pace a bit more but soon heard someone calling his name over and over again.

"Shuuichi!" a female voice yelled. "Shuuichi wait up!"

He turned around to see one of his female ex-classmates running up to him. She stood next to him and looked at him cutely as she began to catch her breath.

"Hi!" she said.

"Hello Sakura." he said gently.

"I…uh…just wanted to know…" She blushed. "Will you go out with me?"

Kurama looked away. He coughed a bit and thought it over. He was still waiting. He looked back at her with an empty smile.

"I'm sorry Sakura," he answered.

"Why?" she asked. "We're not in school anymore! Unless…" She backed down. "You're waiting for someone…"

"I am," he confessed.

"Oh." She turned her back to him. "She must be very lucky…to have someone like you Shuuichi."

"Thank you." He smiled, still empty.

"I'll…see you later…" She ran away from the red head, off into the distance and Kurama began to walk off once more.

He did feel a bit bad for turning her down, but then again he knew that she would never accept him for everything he was down on the inside like Mikai had. He figured that she would be the only one who ever would, and figured that he would forever be Shuuichi, never Kurama to another woman.

Yusuke was on his way back to Kurama's house when he saw him walking on the streets, just like he had been when he first met him. Yusuke smiled and ran over to him, and grabbed him on the shoulder.

"Hello Yusuke." Kurama said once he had looked at who grabbed him.

"Kurama I need to talk to you," Yusuke said seriously.

"Sure." Kurama blinked, curiously.

Yusuke walked with Kurama and brought him to the back of the pastry shop where he had first met Mikai. He looked around the area as Kurama did too, but then looked at Yusuke.

"What is it?" Kurama asked.

"This is where…I first met Mikai," Yusuke said in a low tone. "This is where we first fought."

"Yusuke what is it?" Kurama didn't really want to talk about Mikai since he had become so sensitive on the subject and it rather got him upset when someone brought up the subject of her.

Yusuke walked over to Kurama and stood in front of him, his eyes looking into his as the seriousness of Yusuke's eyes, fell into Kurama's.

"I want you to hit me as hard as you can," Yusuke ordered.

"Why?" Kurama asked with confusion.

"Because…" Yusuke looked away but quickly looked back at the red head. "I like Mikai…more then a friend…and I feel like I'm betraying you."

Kurama looked away. "I can't hit you Yusuke."

"Why not!?" Yusuke yelled. "I want you to hit me hard enough to knock this idea out of my head!"

Kurama couldn't hit Yusuke, it wasn't right. Why should he punish Yusuke for telling him how he felt about something? Even though a part of Kurama did want to hit Yusuke for telling him that he liked the woman he loved, he couldn't do that to someone he had known for so long.

Thunder clapped above the two once more, but it failed to grab their attention.

"I'm sorry Yusuke," Kurama said as he backed away from the black haired boy. "I can't hit you."

Kurama walked away from the other boy as he called his name over and over again. Yusuke hissed as he watched Kurama walk away, and slammed his fist into the brick wall next to him.

"Dammit," he cursed.

Kurama arrived home an hour later, wet. The rain had caught him on his way in so he ran the rest of the way. He walked into his living room and looked at a nearby clock.

3:30

I still have time.

He walked back into his room, and over his desk. Sitting there were the college papers, which he had to have in my five so he could go to his new home, America.

He grabbed the letter and before he left, he looked back at the pure rose and saw that a petal had fallen off of it. He looked away from it and walked out of the room.

I'm sorry. He thought. But I can't wait anymore. I have to do something…for me now. It's the only thing I have left.

He quickly walked out of his room, and over to the front door. He grabbed the handle and shivered a bit. Was he really going to send this letter in and travel to America, leaving everything behind? The few things he had left where in Japan, and by going to America, he would be so far away from them.

His phone rang and he stood there, wondering if he should pick up or not but before he could reach for it, the machining machine got it.

"You've reached the Minamino residence. Please leave a message," his stepfather's voice said followed by a beep.

"Yeah Kurama I mean Shuuichi or whatever…screw it," Yusuke's voice said through the speaker. "I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for what I said back near the pastry shop. I'm sorry for everything man…" He sighed. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect Mikai and I'm sorry I couldn't bring her back to your door like a real man should have. I just want you to know…I wanna see you one more time…before you leave for America…or the Makai."

The message ended and Kurama now had something new to think about. The Makai. There was nothing here holding him back from going. He could go back to being Youko and never worry about anyone else ever again. Before he had stayed Shuuichi for his mother but she didn't need him anymore, no one needed him to stay Shuuichi, the lie he had been living for the past seventeen years.

The Makai…or America? Kurama thought. Damn.

He opened the door and walked out, grabbing a small umbrella on the way out. He opened it and stepped out into the rain and towards the post office.

Kurama was walking straight even though everything seemed so upside down to him. To go to the Makai, or America? In America he would be Shuuichi and in the Makai he would become his true self, Youko. He could pick up where he left off and become stronger but could Kurama truly abandon everything he had been working with for so long in one simple choice?

"Never abandon anything…Never."

He didn't want too. He wanted to go to America and try to find something there, and besides if Mikai ever did come back, she would know where to find him easily but it would be almost impossible in the Makai.

America then… Kurama thought. I'm going to college in America…in order to make my Mother happy.

He was forgetting about himself once more since Mikai wasn't there to remind him once more of how important his feelings were. He thought over that, and discovered that he had to think something out for himself. This was his future, no one else's.

I can go between college and the Makai. Kurama figured. I can do that…to please both sides of me.

Again he was trying to please both sides of him but this time, he was worried about whether Mikai would be able to find him or not so he had to prepare for everything and maybe he would be preparing for nothing.

Mikai…There's a part of me…that wishes I could have fallen down into that hole with you.

Kurama's thoughts grew quiet as he listened to the rain around him. It was calming and peaceful, and took his mind off everything, which was happening to him. He sighed, and then his hearing picked up on someone walking. It was coming from in front of him but he didn't bother to look for there were people around him but then the footsteps stopped. Fearing that he would bump into the person, he looked upwards.

There soaked with the pure rain, which fell around them both stood Mikai. Her hair was stuck to her head and her clothes were dripping with water. Over her shoulder was a black bag. She looked at Kurama and smiled.

He dropped everything, the umbrella, and his letter, which fell into the puddle underneath him, smearing all of his writings. He ran towards her and wrapped his arms around her, wanting to know if everything he was seeing was real. Everything was proven to him when she wrapped her arms around him, and held him tightly to her body.

"I thought that you would never come back," Kurama whispered.

Mikai smiled. "I'll always come back for you. Always my love."

R&R please!