The Fragmented Thoughts of a Mage (About to Learn How to be In) Battle
Kitty Ryan, 2003
Note: Forgive the break in pattern, but Neal simply wouldn't shut up.
Well, sir, I don't know what to say
Don't laugh, it's true
I'm lost for words,
Mute even in excuses,
Not blind, but seeing only the way.
'The way of what?' you demand,
Your voice joined by hundreds more.
I try to answer; I laugh the levity off.
But I can't pull off a Player's act.
I need this change,
This way of life
(There, sir, I said it.)
Where our talents lie does not make your life my law.
This choice is mine to make, sir.
You know it is, in the end.
And I know you know, you see,
So don't complain,
(Too much)
At this transition,
This apparently mad decision,
To learn how to create the wounds,
That I've been learning to mend.
Yes, I am mad.
You've known it, and I've known it.
I've been doing perfectly well where I was,
I have a skill, and all that.
I will hate the crudity,
The bluntness,
The lack of debate.
Too old and too opinionated,
Yet I seem to be like a child,
Acting on a whim, 'just because!'
Because I can, because I want to, Because I need.
Well, now you've said your piece, and I've put down my needle.
I'm five years late already.
Say your 'I told you so's, as I whine about the warriors world,
As both you and I know I shall.
But don't hold be back,
And never ask me why.
'Why?'
Because I refuse to justify justice.