The SGC Weekly.
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Our Top Story
By: Daniel Jackson
This week one of our top stories has been 9 years in the making. General O'Neill, after being promoted to Head of Home world Security, came back to finish his unfinished business. After waiting nine years for the opportunity that wouldn't be against regs, He and Colonel formerly Major Carter announced their wedding. All SGC personnel wishing to attend the wedding are asked to RSVP. Contact SGT. Siler at ext. 259.
Kelowna Renamed
By: Jonas Quinn
The planet formerly known as Kelowna has been renamed by all the nations to something that suits everyone. Langara was chosen as the name because, well I actually don't know, but it sounds pretty!
Research on Ascension
By: Dr. Robert Lee
Recent research on Ascension proves that what most people refer to as "Going Glowy" is actually every cell in your body imploding on itself causing miniature nuclear reactions to be made.
They really are out to get us!
By: Janet Frasier (isn't she dead?)
All research on the ancient's time ship seems to prove most of the personnel's theories. They really are all out to get us. For example, I should be dead, I remember dying, and I remember several other things that I'm not sure actually happened. I remember dying on P3X-666 (number of the beast eh?) and then I woke up the next day at home, in bed. I have also discovered that TPTB (The powers that be) have been out to get General O'Neill and Colonel Carter together for the past 9 years.
Chickens!
By: Jack O'Neill
Through careful research and study I have determined that the Ancients resembled something close to a chicken. Therefore I am descended from a chicken, As is Colonel Sheppard of the Atlantis Expedition. Most of the people in this galaxy are descended from chickens. So next time you see a chicken, give it a little more respect!
A/N hope you like it! I wrote it as an assignment for my Digital Comm. Tools class. It was in a different format but the server couldn't process it! Please R&R
Loethaelis