How Far 3/6
Sara Sidle's Apartment
She was so very tired. She struggled with the lock to her door. All Sara Sidle wanted to do was crawl inside her apartment and try and forget today had ever happened. Finally winning her struggle with the lock, she threw her keys on the table and her jacket over a barstool.
She looked around her apartment, what had become part of a sad excuse for a life. She promised herself she would never go back to the way she was when she first came to Vegas. Another broken promise but this time it hurt more cause it was a promise she made to herself.
Old science journals, empty packages and catalogs littered what was supposed to be her living room. Feeling her emotions start to build again, she grabbed her trash can, and with an odd sense of déjà vu, she picked anything and everything that trash can could hold and threw it inside . She sat down on a barstool and surveyed the room making sure she got everything. She felt an odd sense of relief. She turned herself around only to have the tears start to build again when she looked at the refrigerator.
Nothing but menus and phone numbers of restaurants.
She placed her head in her hands and finally gave in to the tears that beckoned to be shed.
Gil Grissom's Apartment
He had no idea how he made it home. He was in a daze ever since he left Catherine in the Lab parking lot. He started driving to Sara's house but he couldn't make the turn. She wouldn't talk to him anyway. Would she? Of course not, he wouldn't be surprised if he walked in tomorrow and her resignation was on his desk.
Wouldn't be the first time. Wouldn't be the first time he was the cause of it either. The image of her standing there, tears down her face pleading to him not to give up still haunted him. But it was all for the best, 'they' could never be. He looked around his apartment and finally realized how very alone he was. The part that killed him the most was he didn't have to be alone. Sara could be there with him. Loving him.
He would never do that to her. He was too old. She was young and beautiful, she would never stay with him. She would tire of him, want someone younger, leave him brokenhearted to die alone. He was her supervisor, jobs would be at stake and he would never let her loose her job over him. She was too good at what she did. And he wasn't worth it.
He walked into the kitchen and grab the bottle of vodka that Catherine and him always shared when they had breakfast together. Grab a glass and poured himself a shot. Looking at his empty apartment he downed it. He felt it burn as it ran down his throat. He poured himself another shot and just as he was about to let it slide his phone rang.
He pulled the phone out of his pocket and looked at the caller ID.
Catherine
"What is it Catherine?" he answered.
"You haven't gone to see her yet have you? If you had, I know for damn sure you wouldn't be picking up your phone."
"Nothing can be done Catherine. With the positions we both are in its against policy. I will not risk her job. Beside I'm to old for her," he stated wallowing in self pity.
"OH FOR THE LOVE OF … look Grissom you are sounding like you got one foot in the grave already. Damn, your not that old! That would make ME old-er and I am not old! Besides, age doesn't matter Griss as long as everything still works."
There was a long pause … a long awkward pause.
"Of course everything works!" Grissom finally said.
"Just checking. Listen to me as long as you two keep the bedroom out of the office no one is ever gonna know. And the people who do know, don't care, in fact the people who already know would prefer you guys finally did something about it."
"If Ecklie found out he would go straight to the director and …" he started.
"Ecklie's not going know. That man is so self involved, you could probably throw Sara down have sex right in front of him and he wouldn't notice. Stop making excuses Gil. Take a chance." and with that she hung up.
Grissom grabbed his keys and headed out the door.
Sara Sidle's Apartment
She stared at the phone and the paper she held in hand. Who was she kidding, she hit the number 3 on her speed dial.
"Hi this is Sara Sidle at 1101 Brayton Street."
"Ah Miss Sidle, how are you tonight?" the young guy asked.
"Doing good James. How are you?" she replied.
"Awesome proposed to Jenny and she said Yes!" he said excitedly.
"Oh … sweet. I'm happy for you. Congratulations."
"Thanks Miss Sidle. So, you going for your usual tonight," he asked.
"Um … yes please James." she sighed into the phone.
"No problem, but it may be a little over 45 min till I can bring it to ya. We are freaking swamped man! Rain brings everyone out. That cool Miss Sidle?"
"Yeah James, no big deal."
"Alright, no sweat. I will be there as soon as I ca,." he answered, urgency in his voice.
"Thanks James."
"You got it Miss Sidle. Later"
She hung up the phone turned on the stereo and headed to her bathroom. She could hear the country music station as she turned the shower on its hottest setting. She stepped inside and let the steam and scalding water help soothe her. It was here where the stress of the day forced more tears to fall.
She tired to cry out the day. She tried to cry out Gil Grissom. If only she had stayed in the lab none of this would have happened. What was she going to say when she saw Grissom? What could she say? Then she remembered this was Grissom. He's going to act just like he has in the past … as if nothing had happened. Every moment they have shared, she often wondered if she just imagined it all.
When there was no strength left in her to cry, skin red and numb from the water she turned off the shower. She threw on her track pants and a tank top and headed into the living room, towel drying her head as she went.
She sat down in her favorite, over stuffed chair and let the cushions and the sound of country music to consume her. If only Greg knew she listened to country music he would never talk to her again. Just as she started to relax there was a knock at the door.
Grabbing her wallet from the purse on the breakfast bar and headed toward the door.
"James I thought you said 45 minutes at least. You're early buddy," she said opening the door, still fumbling with her wallet. "How much is it again?" She looked up and to her surprise she looked into the eyes of a beaten … and wet Gil Grissom.