Chapter 2:
Day 1: October 26th 1999: 7:00 A.M.
Right now, I'm looking at my surveillance camera in Calvin's room.
The alarm is now ringing, but Calvin is not awaking.
"CALVIN, GET DRESSED AND GET YOUR BUTT DOWN HERE"- Calvin's mom.
Calvin seems to be picking up a sledge hammer.
Oh no, the alarm clock is one of my main cameras in his room.
He is now taking a swing at the camera, shoot, now we have lost the main camera in his room.
OK, now I see him walking into the bathroom.
He is brushing his teeth.
I have two main cameras in this room, one in the drain (which I don't think was a very good idea" and one in the overhead light bulb.
Oh great, now he is spitting out his toothpaste, and now it has hit the camera and we have lost connection with that camera.
These cameras are not in very good places (curse those guys who were setting these cameras up, no wonder they only cost 5 bucks).
We have one camera right on the door, which is camouflaged with the color of the door.
He is now walking past the door.
Now he is walking into the dining room, and is eating some Chocolate Frosted Covered Sugar Bombs.
"Hey Calvin, guess what, I found this puppy on the street today, so I decided to take him in" – Calvin's mom.
"ARE YOU CRAZY, THAT THING COULD HAVE RABIES"- Calvin.
That puppy that his mom got is actually one of my surveillance cameras, it's just a robot.
"Calvin, be nice to the puppy"- Calvin's mom.
"BUT WHAT IF IT STARTS GOING INSANE"- Calvin.
"I think you have gone insane"- Calvin's mom.
"Calvin, hurry up and get your shoes on, your gonna miss the bus"- Calvin's mom.
"I'm hurrying"- Calvin.
Now I have already set it up so that Calvin will miss this bus, I bribed his bus driver to come early.
"CALVIN, HERE COMES THE BUS"- Calvin's mom.
"BUT IT'S ONLY 7:05, THE BUS COMES AT 7:10!"- Calvin.
"WELL IT'S HERE NOW, AND NOW IT'S LEAVING"- Calvin's mom.
"Oh darn (sarcastically) I guess I can't go to school"- Calvin.
"No, I'm gonna have to drive you to school, be ready to go in 10 minutes"- Calvin's mom.
Calvin is now walking up to his room.
He is talking to his stuffed tiger, Hobbes.
"Why aren't you on the bus?"- Hobbes.
"I missed the bus, so my mom is driving me to school today"- Calvin.
"But your bus is supposed to come right now, it's 7:10"- Hobbes.
"Yeah, but for some reason, it came early today"- Calvin.
"Hmm, I've been gettin' a really strange feeling this morning, it feels like someone is watching me"- Calvin.
Oh no, he's onto me, OK, DID YOU TELL CALVIN?
Well, I don't think you can tell, since you're the reader of this story, and you can't magically warp into this story, or can you?
Oh well, I doubt you told him anyway, no back to Calvin.
He is now getting in his mom's car.
I have set up some surveillance cameras in his mom and dad's car, in the clock, and in the rear view mirror.
And, since I knew Calvin would be going to school in his mom's car, I messed up with the cars wires.
His mom is putting her foot on the gas peddle, and now the horn is honking (because I messed with the wires).
She has pulled her foot off the peddle.
"WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT"- Calvin's mom and Calvin.
"CALVIN, WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY CAR"- Calvin's mom.
"I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING, I SWEAR"- Calvin.
"YOU KNOW WHAT, YOUR GROUNDED, AND NOW I'M GONNA HAVE TO CALL YOUR DAD AND TELL HIM TO COME PICK YOU UP AND BRING YOU TO SCHOOL"- Calvin's mom.
Yes, everything is going exactly as planed... I mean... oops... you didn't hear anything.
(20 minutes later) Calvin's dad has arrived.
"CALVIN I'M REALLY UPSET WITH YOU, I CAN LOOSE MY JOB, ALL BECAUSE I HAD TO COME PICK YOU UP!"- Calvin's dad.
"SORRY DAD"- Calvin.
I have already popped Calvin's dad's car's tires.
Calvin and his dad are about half way to school when...
"Oh great, my tires are popped, and I think I know how it happened... CALVIN WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY TIRES!"- Calvin's dad.
"I didn't do anything dad, honestly"- Calvin.
"Oh sure, and now I'm gonna grow bunny ears (sarcastically)"- Calvin's dad.
I have poured some potion on Calvin's dads head to make him grow bunny ears.
"Hey dad, your actually growing bunny ears"- Calvin.
"YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GETTIN' REALLY SICK OF YOUR SARCASUM... WAIT I'M ACTUALLY GROWING BUNNY EARS, CCCCAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLVVVVVVVIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNN YOU DID THIS!"- Calvin's dad.
"IT WASN'T ME, HONESTLY"- Calvin.
"THAT'S IT MISTER, YOUR WALKING TO SCHOOL"- Calvin's dad.
HAHAHA, MY PLAN IS WORKIN... I mean... oh too bad, Calvin has to walk.
Calvin has now arrived at school.
I have set up cameras in all the classrooms Calvin will be in today, and I'll take notes on his first class, History, and last class, GYM CLASS!
Calvin has walked into the classroom.
"CALVIN, your half and hour late"- Miss Wormwood.
"OH BE QUIET YOU DINOSAUR"- Calvin.
"Guess what, YOU JUST EARNED YOURSELF A DETENTION"- Miss Wormwood.
"Whoopee (sarcastically)"- Calvin.
"THAT'S IT, TWO DETENTIONS, NOW SIT DOWN"- Miss Wormwood.
Calvin has sat in his seat.
"Now today class we're learning about the Civil War"- Miss Wormwood.
"Or as I like to call it, the Boring War"- Calvin.
"YOU BETTER ZIP IT MISTER"- Miss Wormwood.
Now I have created a machine that launches spitballs, and I sprayed with invisible spray, and now I'm gonna make it look like Calvin is throwing the spitballs.
Fire number 1.
Direct hit!
"WHO DID THAT"- Miss Wormwood.
"OH LET ME GUESS, CALVIN!"- Miss Wormwood.
Calvin was almost asleep.
"What, what did I do?"- Calvin.
"You threw the spitball at me"- Miss Wormwood.
"WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK I DO EVERYTHING THAT IS BAD"- Calvin.
"Because you are bad"- Miss Wormwood.
"Ok class, gym time!"- Miss Wormwood.
Everyone is rushing to the gymnasium, and Calvin is the in the front of the stampede, and I put a twig in the hallway so he will trip and get run over.
Calvin is approaching the twig.
HE HAS TRIPPED, YES!... I mean, oh darn.
"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH, I'M GETTING STEPPED ON"- Calvin.
Calvin is now walking into the gym
"Ok, today class, we will play a nice friendly game of DODGEBALL, AND EVERYONE GANG UP ON CALVIN"- Calvin's gym teacher.
"Why are all these bad things happening to..."- Calvin.
He was interrupted by a barrage of dodge balls.
I had bribed the gym teacher to do that.
Calvin is now going to the front door of his house, and Hobbes is right behind the front door.
Calvin is opening the door.
"TIGER ATTACK!"- Hobbes.
"Oh please no"- Calvin.
Calvin is walking upstairs to his room, and he wants to go to bed early? This is not like Calvin.
"CALVIN, YOU HAVEN'T EVEN EATEN DINNER YET"- Calvin's mom.
But Calvin is already sleeping.
End of Day 1