This chapter contains a mildly graphic sexual encounter between two married, consenting adults. So, this chapter is rated, "Not for Kiddes."
Chapter Ten
Sergeant McKay had helped Matthew search for Ethan, but eventually, the night grew too late, and he had to be moving on. So, he took Matthew to the farm, dropped him off and went about his way. Matthew thanked the kind man and fell asleep in the hay at the back of the barn. It was morning now, and Matthew was wide-awake, sitting outside around the fire he'd made to cook breakfast on.
"Matthew?" Brian climbed out of the hayloft when he saw his brother outside. "Matthew!" Brian took a few steps down the ladder and jumped the rest of the way, landing in a soft pile of fresh hay. Colleen followed suit, and they hurried out to gather next to their brother. Matthew scooped fish out onto flimsy tin plates and handed them around.
"Ya didn't find 'im, did ya?" Colleen asked, her eyes lowering to her food.
"I'm gonna go look again today."
"I'm goin' too," Brian said.
"Me too," Colleen replied.
"No! It's no place for the two of ya."
"So? You ain't much older."
"I'm the man of the house right now, so ya gotta do what I say," Matthew replied. "If we don't find Pa today, he ain't comin' back. If that happens, we're gonna do what we can to get back to Denver and get our sister."
"How we gonna do that?" Brian wondered, chewing on his thumbnail. "We ain't got no money."
"We'll find a way," Matthew promised. At that moment, the beating of horse hooves sounded around the barn, and Matthew stood with his brother and sister. They were shocked to see the uniformed man upon his stallion. "Sergeant McKay? What're you still doin' here?" He looked down at the three with worry and sympathy in his eyes. He slowly opened his mouth to speak.
"I think I might've found your pa."
Julianna woke in her hotel room, her head full of memories of the night before. She frowned as she pulled herself out of bed and wrapped her gown around herself tightly. She looked at the clock and chewed on her bottom lip for a moment. She'd catch the train in three hours, if it was up and running, and she'd head toward Colorado Springs. She hadn't intended to go there, but she had heard how beautiful it was, and she wanted to see it for herself. Perhaps she would sit in a meadow and stare up at the well-known Pike's Peak for inspiration.
Her thoughts drifted to Andrew. He had been talkative and lively throughout their coffee conversation the night before, but he seemed to shut down as the night grew later. He hadn't even offered to walk her back to the hotel, and they had parted ways at the gate of the café. She didn't know what to make of him, but she was still intrigued. He reminded her so much of the man in her book who suffered from a mental disease that separated his mind into multiple personalities. But Andrew couldn't be the man she was writing about, could he? Perhaps it was her own mind that picked apart everything and everybody. She figured that she was thinking too much about it.
She hadn't found out anything about the mysterious stranger except for his name and the fact that he came from California, and on this morning, he was still a stranger to her. She felt cold, distant and confused. At that moment, she heard movement outside of her hotel room door, and she saw an envelope slip under the crack between the floor and the bottom of the door. She held her breath and slowly moved across the room. She bent down slowly and picked it up. Her name was scrawled across the front of the envelope. She opened it up and took out the note. She silently read it to herself.
Julianna,
Meet me at ten for coffee.
He hadn't even signed his name, and that made her smile, because he had known she'd know who it was from. He made her nervous, but he made her heart pound, and that had to be something, right? She was tired of normal, simple gentlemen. She wanted someone different, someone who could continue to surprise her everyday.
She would probably never see him again, so should she go? She figured it would be foolish, but something about the way he looked into her eyes and saw right into her soul made her want to go. She looked up at the clock. She had an hour. She tapped her fingers upon the oak desk and read the note over and over again. She shook her head. It was no use taking a chance on a man who had obvious problems that she may never be able to help with. It was no use going into another relationship with such an uncertain future. She had learned her lesson. Love wasn't part of the plan any longer. She had a novel to finish, but something told her that this man was a part of her novel. He was turning into the man she'd dreamed up long ago. That was supposed to frighten her, but surprisingly, it didn't. It made him even more fascinating.
Julianna moved back toward the door, and she opened it up. Nobody was there, and she had figured he wouldn't be. She swallowed hard and went back inside, closing out the world. Her heart skipped and pounded, and she wasn't sure if she was going to make it to her bureau to put on a decent dress. She couldn't risk being late for her train either. No, this was no good. She wouldn't meet him. But what would she tell him if he took the same train as she did?
She wouldn't catch that train. She would take an earlier one. She'd leave first and ride away from him forever, because love wasn't worth the heartbreak, the pain, the broken friendships or the time. She'd wasted so much time trying to be a good wife, but she hadn't been. He'd tried hard to make it work too, and even though they were friends, it hadn't been enough to make a happy home. She wasn't supposed to be loved.
She found herself trembling, and she took in a deep breath. She moved to the desk and opened up her journal again.
I'll take the early train and avoid meeting him again. I want to see him, but I've learned my lesson time and time again. I wasn't born to be a lover, a wife, a mother or anything of the sort. I was born to be a writer, to learn and to teach the world what they don't know about me through my words. How can I let a stranger get to me the way he has? There is something dark in his soul, but I've responded to it. I hate myself for it, because I know it's foolish. He's certainly not the kind of man my mother would have chosen for me to marry. I had that man once, but that didn't work out. I broke his heart, and he broke mine when I had to watch him try to make it work. We didn't know we could do so much damage by not saying anything at all. Mr. Strauss was kind to me, but I don't think that's who he really is. My soul is yearning to learn more about him. Perhaps…perhaps I'll learn about him from a distance.
She closed her journal and quickly packed it away. Her eyes were on the clock as she dressed and fixed her hair. It was a quarter 'til ten by the time she left the hotel with her luggage in tow. She walked right past the café and straight toward the depot.
Albert had gotten an early start that morning. He'd woken at sunrise, and he had slipped out before Lydia could wake. He hadn't slept at all, and he wanted to take his mind off of telling Lydia about his past. But, she had woken not long ago, dressed and gone down to the telegraph office to see if there were any packages for her. Albert was chopping wood for Michaela and Sully. They were still sleeping, as far as he knew, and he wanted them to get the chance to rest as much as possible. He had to tell her, but now wasn't the time. It didn't feel right, but then again, it would probably never feel right.
"Albert!" Lydia said with a grin as she hurried down the street toward the clinic. "Great news!"
"What is it?" Albert asked, moving toward his wife, seeing the piece of paper in her hands.
"My cousin is coming for a visit."
"Your cousin?"
"Yes! He's my cousin from California, and you're going to love him!" Albert laughed a little and kissed her cheek. "Oh, I can't wait for him to meet you, but I must warn you that he's very protective of me. He was like a big brother to me when we were growing up."
"What happened?"
"His family moved away, and I haven't seen him since I was ten or so. I can't wait to see him again. Oh, Albert, I'm so excited!" Albert chuckled at his wife's excitement, and he kissed her lovingly.
"If he's half as wonderful as you, I bet we're going to be good friends. What's his name?" Lydia blushed.
"In all of my excitement, I forgot to tell you! His name is Andrew Strauss."
Katie woke her parents with a loud shriek, and Michaela sat up, her heart pounding and her eyes wide. Sully sat up too, when he realized that Katie was up, and he quickly pulled himself out of bed. He pulled Katie into his arms and immediately handed her to her mother.
"I'll go fix her a bottle," he offered. Michaela nodded gratefully and watched as Sully left the room. Michaela pulled a fresh diaper out of the bedside table and began to change Katie. Katie squirmed and kicked and cried herself to sleep, and by the time she was in a fresh diaper, she was sleeping away. Sully entered with a warm bottle, and Michaela laughed.
"Too late," she grinned, "but I'm sure she'll feel hungry soon." Sully smiled and put the bottle aside. He pulled Michaela close, and they greeted each other with a good morning kiss.
"Mornin'. How ya feelin'?"
"Wonderful, actually. After I went back to sleep, I was so relaxed," she breathed. "Thank you for being there for me last night."
"I'll always be here," he promised. Sully heard something outside, and he moved toward the window. He looked out to see Lydia and Albert talking, and he looked toward his wife. "Looks like we slept in, or somebody got an early start." Michaela laughed and looked toward the clock.
"We slept in," she giggled. She gently cradled the baby in her arms, climbed out of bed, put Katie back down in her little bed and moved to stand behind her husband. She moved her hands up his back, down his shoulders, and she finally brought her arms around his waist and rested her cheek against his back. "I could stay here forever, Sully." Sully turned and pulled her body close to his, cradling her frame against his.
"Me too," he replied, his eyes staring down into hers. They hadn't been intimate since they'd been in Boston, but he was holding back. He was worried about her, because he knew she was probably still tender from the miscarriage. Her olive and hazel eyes stared up into his, inviting him closer, silently asking him to be one with her. Their lips touched, and they breathed each other in, becoming one for just a moment, the rest of the world disappearing into the dusty streets of Colorado Springs. "Michaela?"
"Hmm?" she asked as Sully gently pushed her back. She looked up, her eyes full of confusion and hurt. "Sully? Don't you…"
"'Course I do. But, are ya sure it's time? After everything…" Michaela looked down, pulling her arms around herself. She as a doctor knew that it would be a good idea to wait a little while longer, but as a wife and a woman, her body was telling her it was right. He could see the need and frustration in her eyes, and he smiled.
"But don't you…"
"Don't worry," Sully whispered, bringing her hands into his and kissing each of them softly. "No need to worry 'bout me. I can wait for ya, Michaela." Michaela sighed softly, and she nodded, her eyes full of disappointment, but she fully understood, and she loved him for caring so much.
"It's difficult," she whispered, her cheeks flushing. "I want to make you happy."
"Ya do that every single day," Sully assured her. "I swear it, Michaela." She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck again. They held one another tight for just a little while, and when they pulled away, Sully scooped her up into his arms and carried her back to the bed. She was surprised, but she smiled and relaxed as he sat on the edge of the bed and smiled down at her.
"I thought…" Sully's hands began to unbutton her nightgown, and Michaela sucked in a sharp breath. Sully nodded.
"Ya trust me?"
"I do," she breathed. "Are you…"
"Shh." He leaned down and softly kissed her lips. "Just breathe." Michaela nodded and closed her eyes, feeling his hands pulling her under garments off. She moved a bit so he could slip the nightgown off of her, and she felt the temperature in the room get to her skin and cling to it. Sully's eyes roamed over her body, and she bit her lip, feeling self-conscious. Sully grinned and moved to press his lips to hers. Michaela anxiously looked toward the bed, and Sully placed his hand upon her cheek and turned her head back so he could stare into her eyes. "Don't worry. We just gotta learn how 'ta be quiet like on the train." Michaela giggled nervously as Sully's hands moved up her legs. She closed her eyes for a brief moment, feeling her body trembling with tension, anticipation, need, desire, love and so many other things. She had missed him, and there had been a time when she'd wondered if she'd ever get to feel his touch again.
As his hands caressed the parts of her that had ached for his touch, his kisses hungrily loved her and made her yearn for more. Her eyes squeezed shut tightly as new life poured into her. An intense power flooded through her system as she sucked in another sharp breath. Her toes and fingers curled simultaneously, and her moans were lost as she bit her lip and arched her back. She needed to feel this way, and it brought her back to her wedding night. He'd been so patient, and they'd both been so clumsy, not knowing quite what to do. But it had been so natural. They knew one another so well, and they fit together and moved together like a perfectly orchestrated piece of music.
Every bad thought and event that had happened lately flew out the window as he filled her with love and light and happiness, all with his hands and his kisses. The way he touched her was special. He wasn't rough or selfish, and this proved that he would do anything to please her, and oh, he certainly was pleasing her.
"Sully," she breathed as her head hit the pillow and her hands searched for his. His hands moved up her body, gently cupping her breasts. She placed her hands over his, making their experience more intimate. Tears flooded her eyes, and her lip trembled. She felt herself let go, and she relaxed against the sheets, her breathing still quick, but her tension winding down.
He moved to lay at her side, and she wrapped the sheet around her body. The tears fell, and Sully breathed slowly, studying her face as she came down from her natural high. Michaela smiled and reached over to brush a few damp strands of hair off of his forehead.
"You okay?" he asked. Michaela's cheeks flushed, and Sully watched her close her eyes tiredly.
"Yes," she replied, placing her hand on her chest, feeling her heart still thumping hard. "I never thought it could be like this. My mother never told me about these kinds of things." She felt her face growing redder.
"'Course not," Sully laughed. "But that's part of the fun of bein' married. Ya get to learn things for yourself." Michaela smiled and sat up in bed, feeling ill again. "Michaela?"
"I…" She slowly stood and pulled her gown on, her face growing paler by the minute.
"Michaela?" Sully moved to stand beside her. "Did I do somethin'?"
"No. I don't…" She placed her hand over her mouth and sprinted out of the room. Sully wanted to go after her, but Katie began to cry. He sighed heavily and moved to pick his daughter up.
"C'mere, Kates," he said softly. "Ya hungry?" He sat down on the bed and began to feed Katie her bottle, hoping that Michaela would come back soon. He was worried about her, and he was seriously considering wiring for Dr. Bernard.
When Michaela returned, her face was pale, but she looked like she felt much better.
"I'm worried 'bout ya, Michaela. What's…"
"I'm fine," she said quickly. "I'm going to go clean up." She pulled out some clean clothes for the day, tucked them under her arm and hurried out of the room. Sully quickly finished feeding Katie, and he put her down. He walked down the hall to a room he had had a copper tub put into. Michaela was pouring some exotic-smelling perfumes into the empty tub, and Sully smiled a little as she pulled her hair back and twisted it up so she wouldn't get it wet. He walked in, and she looked up. "Could you bring up some hot water?"
"Sure," Sully said softly. "Michaela…"
"I'm fine," she assured him. "All I need is a hot bath, and I'll feel much better."
"I don't believe ya. Somethin' ain't right." Michaela sighed heavily and shook her head.
"Sully, I assure you I'm fine. I'm probably getting used to…"
"Michaela," he interrupted, "at least let me take ya to Cloud Dancin'. He's the Cheyenne medicine man, and he's very wise. Maybe he'll have somethin' for ya."
"No," Michaela replied.
"Why not?" He sounded a little offended. "'Cause he's Cheyenne?" Michaela shook her head with frustration.
"No, of course not! I don't want you fussing over me, because I'm fine."
"At least talk to Cloud Dancin'. Please?" Michaela sighed and moved to hug Sully.
"If it'll make you feel better, I'll talk to him. I've been wanting to meet him anyway." Sully softly kissed her forehead.
"It will make me feel better," Sully replied softly. He kissed her forehead again, and she smiled up at him. "I'll go get that water for ya now." Michaela nodded and prepared for her bath, as Sully went to boil the water.
"I'm real sorry," Terrance McKay said quietly, as he walked alongside Matthew. They'd built a litter to carry Ethan's body back to the farm. "Do you know of anyone who would have wanted to hurt your father?" Matthew fought the urge to say 'anybody who's ever met him,' and he shook his head.
"No Sir," he said quietly. "Ya don't gotta follow us no longer. Ya should go after your troops."
"They'll understand. If they don't, they'll have to take it up with me." He patted Matthew's back. "You kids got a place to stay?" Matthew looked at Colleen and Brian who walked quietly alongside him.
"Yes Sir. We got a place," he lied. "We got an aunt comin' to stay. She heard 'bout our Ma dyin', and she's comin' to help."
"I'm real sorry for your loss."
"We'll be all right. Thank you, Sir." They descended the hill and moved toward the burial plot.
"Need any help here?
"No Sir. I can take care of it. Thank you." McKay tipped his hat and patted Matthew on the back once again.
"Good luck." He left hesitantly. He didn't want the children to have to be alone, but he had his duty to the country to attend to. He only hoped that these children's misfortunes were through. They didn't need anything else on their plates at this moment. His heart went out to them all.
Brian waved as McKay rode off, and he looked up at Matthew.
"What're we gonna do now?" Matthew grabbed a shovel, the one they'd used to dig Charlotte's grave. He began to dig away, and Colleen and Brian stood aside, watching their brother with worry.
"Matthew," Colleen said quietly, "Pa's gone."
"That's as plain as day," Matthew snapped. Colleen was taken aback, and she felt Brian hug her around the waist. She soothingly rubbed his back. "You're scarin' Brian."
"Ain't we s'posed to be scared?" Matthew asked. "Our parents are dead, and our little sister is only God knows where!" Colleen burst into tears, and she moved away. Brian followed after her, and Matthew sighed heavily. He threw the shovel down into the dirt after making only a few digs into what would be Ethan's final resting place. "Look, I'm sorry, all right?" He was facing their backs, and Colleen's shoulders were slumped over. "I didn't mean it. I'm just…I'm sorry." He sat down on the dry grass and took big fistfuls of it, trying to release some tension, but it didn't really help. He threw the dirt clods away, and he sighed heavily. "I just ain't sure what we're gonna do, is all. We ain't got no money. He spent it all." He nodded toward Ethan's body. "Our little sister's back in Denver, and we ain't got no way to get to her."
"Can't we find a way?" Brian asked, turning toward him.
"It ain't that easy, Brian."
"We got to Denver without hardly any money before. Can't we do it again?" he wondered, moving to sit next to his brother. Matthew wrapped his arm around his little brother's shoulder.
"We can try, little brother," he replied. "It ain't gonna be easy. You up to it?"
"I am. Ma'd want us all to be together." He wrapped his arms around Matthew's neck and hugged him tightly. He looked up at Colleen. She'd turned toward him but had said nothing. "Colleen?"
"I'm glad he's dead," she whispered, shocking Matthew.
"Ya don't mean that."
"Yes I do!" she yelled. "He did nothin' but make us suffer, Matthew! He made Ma sad. He left Katie all alone! Now he goes and dies and leaves us all alone, and I'm glad! I'm glad he's gone, 'cause he was worthless!"
"Stop it!" Brian screamed. "Stop sayin' that!"
"He's right," Matthew said sternly. "First Ma left, now Pa. We can't argue 'bout this, 'cause we're all we've got." He stood, and Colleen ran to him to hug him.
"I'm sorry for the things I said. I…"
"I know," Matthew whispered. "Don't worry. I'll make sure everything's okay. We're gonna be fine." He couldn't tell them he was scared to death. He couldn't tell them that they were possibly facing more than they could handle. He had to be strong. He was a boy of fifteen, but he was the man of the family now. He couldn't let them down.
She boarded the train at ten after ten, and she relaxed against the stiff, straight-backed seats. She'd paid a little extra for an earlier departure, but she didn't mind. She would be avoiding another man, another relationship; another possible chance at happiness. None of it mattered right now. She wasn't at a place in her life where she could let herself feel something for someone, and she knew that Mr. Strauss was not the kind of man she should be feeling anything for.
A small child nearby began to fuss, and she held her tongue. She didn't want another miserable train ride, but she that was the price she had to pay to get her out of Kansas and away from Mr. Strauss. To avoid the horrible sounds of that child's incessant crying, she opened up her journal and began to write again.
I feel like a foolish lovesick girl who will do anything to get away, but does it in such a way that he'll notice. I'm not in love. I'm merely in awe of the man's presence. He's a mystery, and I like that. But I'm not meant to feel this way. It's merely my foolish imagination running away with me. He's out of my life forever, and I intend to keep it that way. I've decided that wherever I decide to go, I'll be sure to stay in Colorado Springs for just a little while. I want to take in the beauty of the wild West, see the Indians or maybe a few bears in their natural habitat. I want to watch an eagle soar above the mountains, and I want to feel completely free from all of the pressures that I faced back in New York. I almost feel like a runaway teenager, angry with her parents for keeping her confined and pure. I feel like a rebel, breaking free from a life that is too small to contain me. I want to live and to see and to be! Marriage and family aren't for me…yet. I know that now. What I need is adventure and passion and to throw my inhibitions to the wind. It doesn't sound like me, but it's what I want. It's always what I've wanted. Damn those who stand in my way. They don't know me. Nobody knows me! Sometimes I feel like I don't know me.
"You didn't want coffee?" She jumped as the train shuddered and blew its whistle. She looked up into the good eye of David Lewis.
"Mr. Strauss," she blushed. "What are you…"
"I'm going to Denver," he said, sitting down beside her. "You didn't receive my note?"
"I did," she said quietly. "But, I wanted to take the early train. I'm sorry I missed you."
"You don't have to lie," he replied.
"I…"
"I'm not the man you met on the train that day," he said quietly, looking away. "There's a lot about me that you don't know." Julianna shifted in her seat.
"I'm sure there is, Mr. Strauss," she said quietly. "I only…" She sighed heavily. The train lurched forward again, and this time, it began to chug and move down the track. She realized that there was really nothing she could say to him. She didn't know how to speak to him, and making excuses were for children. "I didn't want to meet you for coffee today, Mr. Strauss. I'm sorry if I wasted your time."
"No need for apologies," he replied, "if you'll have coffee with me when we get to Denver."
"I'm sorry, but I can't," she replied. "I'm going straight on to Colorado Springs and then toward the ocean from there." He said nothing else, and he seemed to sink inside of himself. She watched as he moved to an empty seat, his posture growing rigid and distant. He wasn't the same man, and that sent chills up her spine. It excited her, and she despised herself.
"Ready to go?" Sully asked, pulling the wagon up outside of the clinic. Michaela was rocking a sleeping Katie in her arms as she waited on a bench. She smiled when she saw him. She was feeling much better now. She didn't feel ill anymore, but Sully insisted on having her see Cloud Dancing that day anyway.
"Yes," she replied. "I can't wait to see the home you've built for us."
"I hope I don't disappoint ya." Michaela handed the baby to Sully, and she pulled herself up into the wagon. Once she was settled, she leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to his lips.
"You could never disappoint me," she breathed, taking Katie back into her arms. Sully slapped the reins, and the horses trotted off down the least bumpy road they could find. Sully was eager to get back to the homestead and see if he looked the way he remembered it. He couldn't wait to see Michaela smile when she saw it. He hoped she would smile, anyway, because he had built that house with the picture of her sitting on the porch with him, watching the children play in the yard. Yes, he had seen a lot of children in that picture, but he would respect whatever happened in the future and whatever Michaela wanted. It was her body, after all. She was the one who had to carry it for nine months and go through the pain of childbirth. Unfortunately, many men didn't comprehend what a toll pregnancy and childbirth could take on a woman's body.
Katie slept most of the way there, and Michaela watched as Sully's eyes twinkled as they neared their home. She was so happy that he was happy, though a part of her felt guilty than they were enjoying this and the baby they lost would never get to grow up and enjoy the true beauty of the land they called home.
A lovely two-story cabin and a barn came into view soon enough, and Michaela's eyes were full of enchantment. Sully was thrilled, because he knew that a lot of things couldn't compare to what she'd grown up with in Boston.
"This is it," Sully said, pulling the wagon up beside the corral and parking it. Michaela was speechless, but her bright smile spoke more than words could ever say. Sully climbed out of the wagon and took Katie into his arms. He held a hand out, and Michaela took it long enough to get her balance before she got out of the wagon. Once her feet were firmly planted on the ground, Sully took her hand again and led her up to the house. It wasn't long before a furry wolf came out of the barn.
"Oh!" Michaela exclaimed as the animal rushed over to Sully. Sully handed Katie to Michaela and knelt down to pet his companion.
"Hey boy," Sully said with a laugh. "Ya took care of things while I was gone?" Wolf licked his face, and Sully looked up at Michaela. "Michaela, this is Wolf. Wolf, this is Michaela. She's my wife, so ya don't gotta worry." Sully looked up. "He wouldn't hurt a lady anyhow."
"Hello Wolf," Michaela said, grinning and patting the wolf upon the head.
"I left 'im with Cloud Dancin'," Sully said quietly. He scoured the scene quickly, and a moment later, a tall Cheyenne Indian came walking out of the barn. Sully took Michaela's hand, squeezed it and led her over.
"Hello my friend," Cloud Dancing said quickly, a smile spreading across his face. They embraced and exchanged a few words in Cheyenne that Michaela recognized as "How are you" and "Good. And you?" She said a silent thank you that she'd took the time to try to pick up a few words through that book she'd read. It had certainly made a nice surprise for Sully on their wedding night.
"This is my wife, Michaela Quinn," Sully said.
"Quinn-Sully," Michaela said with a grin, winking at her husband. She extended her pale hand to Cloud Dancing, and his much darker one accepted it. She gave him a firm handshake. "It's very nice to meet the man I've heard so much about."
"I could say the same about you. You have made quite an impact on my brother," Cloud Dancing said cheerfully. "My wife is eager to meet you. Snow Bird has counted the moons until she would be able to meet the medicine woman."
"I would love to meet her," Michaela said with a smile. "I wanted to thank you."
"Thank you?"
"For saving my husband's life," she replied. "When he broke his ankle…"
"No thanks are needed. The ho'nehe guided me to him. The Spirits showed us the way." Michaela patted Wolf upon the head again.
"Then I suppose I should thank you too." Wolf proceeded to lick the palm of her hand and sniff at her skirt. Michaela suddenly felt dizzy, and Sully caught her, holding onto her and the baby tightly. Cloud Dancing stepped forward and helped Michaela stand up straight. He looked into Sully's eyes, and he saw the fear.
"She should rest." Sully nodded, and Cloud Dancing took Katie into his arms. A moment later, Michaela fainted away, and Sully scooped her up into his arms.
"Hang on, Michaela. It's gonna be okay." He rushed her into the house and up the stairs, where he placed her on their bed. Cloud Dancing found a cradle in the corner, and he placed Katie down in it and rushed to Michaela's bedside. Sully rushed out to bring in some fresh water, and Cloud Dancing said a prayer in Cheyenne. Michaela's eyes fluttered open for a moment, and she called for Sully.
"He'll be here soon," Cloud Dancing promised. Michaela was unconscious again. When Sully returned, Cloud Dancing looked up at him.
"She okay?" He sponged some water onto her forehead.
"She's strong," Cloud Dancing said quietly. "She has suffered. You both have." Sully nodded.
"Somethin' bad happened to her in Boston…somethin' I wasn't here for. And…we…we lost our baby just a week ago." Cloud Dancing nodded.
"The Spirits told me you have grieved. You were lost once, but you were healed." Sully's head snapped up.
"The sweat lodge? Ya think she'd…"
"She must be ready before she can go through the ritual. She must let her body heal from her loss, and she must understand that she cannot change the past."
"She knows," Sully said quietly. "She's just havin' a hard time is all. Sometimes I think she feels like she's losin' hope." Cloud Dancing shook his head.
"No. Hope is still inside of her. She must rest," he said quietly. Sully eyed him for a moment, confused, but he finally nodded. "I must get back to Snow Bird, but I will return soon."
"Thank you, my friend," Sully said. Cloud Dancing nodded and left quietly. Michaela began to stir, and Sully kissed her forehead. "How ya feelin'?"
"Dizzy," she whispered. "Is Katie all right?"
"She's just fine." Michaela sighed softly.
"I don't know why I still feel this way, Sully," her voice cracked. She was on the verge of tears, and Sully sat upon the bed and pulled her into his arms. "Maybe something is wrong, like you said."
"I don't think so," Sully whispered, "but I want to be safe. I'll wire for Dr. Bernard as soon as we get back to town."