Chapter 4: Dining Disaster

Many people use the term "time flies when you're having fun." Of course, they don't mean it literally, they merely mean that when you're having fun, time simply seems to slip by at a quicker pace, even though it really doesn't. But, either way, "having a fun time" is a feeling the Baudelaires haven't been familiar with since their parents died in that horrible fire which set off these series of unfortunate events. Although, they did notice that time also flies when you're running out of time to come up with an idea in order to save one of their siblings, so they do know what time flying feels like.

Unfortunately, time wasn't flying as the three orphans stared at the face of a monkey about the same size as Sunny. No one wanted to make the first move, so they just stood there staring at each other; ready to jump at any sudden movements to capture or bite.

I, myself, cannot guess how long it was before the stalemate was ended; but all research points to eternity. In the end it took another variable to stop the stand-off. The catalyst was played by their new caretaker.

When she came across the room all eyes turned to her, she looked at the Baudelaires, then she looked at the monkey: she laughed. "I see you've met William Harrison." She gave a motion to the monkey and he leaped into her welcoming arms and grabbed a fistful of her red hair.

"William Harrison? You named your monkey William Harrison?" Klaus asked, remembering the man who most certainly was not a monkey. Meanwhile, he completely forgot to question the fact that she owned a monkey.

"Don't look at me," she said, "I didn't name him. That's my fellow rangers' fault. I just call him Willis for short."

"I see," Violet said then changed the subject, "You were about to introduce yourself before you left."

"Oh, right. My name is Blaine Allgood," she answered, "you can call me Aunt Blaine though."

"Wrk?" asked Sunny, which probably meant, "What do you do for a living?"; Violet translated for her.

"Well, as you know from my clothes, I'm a ranger, and I also handle some of the less technical environmental things that go around here. You know, run some pollution tests on the water and things like that."

An awkward silence passed as no one knew what to say next and Aunt Blaine looked at her watch, "Well, it's about time to head out for dinner, what do you say?"

The Baudelaires nodded, it was still early but they skipped lunch because they were to busy being frighted out of their wits by Willis. "Misses Allgood?" Klaus asked.

"Please, call me Aunt Blaine."

"Did you happen to get us those clogs while you were gone?"

"Yeah, I left them by the door where your shoes are."

So, with that, they left the house and walked down to town to get some dinner. They eventually agreed to eat at a small place named "The Very Friendly
Diner" which Aunt Blaine said was one of her favorite places to eat.

"How many?" asked a pimpled male host when they got into the building. Aunt Blaine told him and he lead them to a booth.

Overall, the meal passed along uneventfully until they were leaving; they saw two familiar looking powdered faces dining in the booth right next to the door. The Baudelaire children tried to duck out quickly but it was far too late; they had made eye-contact. When the children were on the way back home, despite the fact they were out of eye-distance from the restaurant, they couldn't quite shake the feeling that they were being watched.

Aunt Blaine tried to start conversations several times while on their journey back to the house but eventually gave up; most likely sensing the tension on the orphans who figured it wouldn't have done any good to tell her what they saw. Adults never listened to them.

All night long they felt as if someone were just outside watching, staring, waiting for them to make a mistake. Klaus couldn't conjure up enough will to read the biology books. Violet couldn't quite make herself pay attention to the interesting tests Aunt Blaine was giving to the fox blood and even Sunny couldn't summon up the energy to bite with her normal ferocity.

Eventually, after what felt like hours of mindless wandering, they went to bed with a promise from Aunt Blaine that they'd have a better day tomorrow and "forget their worries." This worried the Baudelaire children. If they forgot their worries and let their guard down they couldn't help but feel that something bad would happen. But they understood what she was trying to say, but her optimism – a word here which means "foolishness" – didn't catch on with the Baudelaires.

Author Notes review and etc. You know the drill. No reviews means poor following chapters and slow writing. Feedback makes the unfortunate events worthwhile to sift through.

Next the orphans deal with enduring
a lady who endears the early morning.