This chapter is dedicated to Hannah! Keep out of the snow girl and rock on! Nothing is mine, its J.K Rowling's!
Narcissa gently brushed her finger over her scars. Narcissa then strolled to her wardrobe to put something on. Something black.
The bed she slept on had two creases. One where Narcissa had slept and one for her husband. It was obvious it was a loveless relationship; the creases were so far apart and confined. There was a note laid out on the dressing table.
You are required to accompany me to the Ministry Annual Ball. Punishment will be severe if you dare tarnish the Malfoy name. Apparition will be strictly at 8pm.
Narcissa grinned. It wasn't for reasons of humour but the fact that she would be parading around showing off her seemingly 'perfect life' with her perfect face, body, clothes, hair and all that jazz but was she in the perfect state of mind?
Like most days, the mansion was lifeless. It contained artefacts that bragged money and aristocracy but really was that something to be proud of? Money equalled power; power was an addiction that consumed her husband. For all this, all she had to show were the scars that decorated her arms.
When the clock struck its hand at 5pm, Narcissa decided it would be a wise idea to get ready. She had no intention what so ever to ruin things for the Malfoy name, it would just cause months of pain and agony. After carefully adorning herself in the finest makeup, she picked up the dress that was left for her on her bed. It was a classic black dress that hugged her figure and hung loosely at her lower back. Her platinum blonde hair was set in a simple knot in the middle of her head and she had used a simple spell to cover up her scars. All was left was the finishing touch. Narcissa walked to her dresser and unlocked a drawer that contained her finest collection of jewellery. She picked up a diamond necklace and placed it around her neck. The piece of jewellery was at least eighteen years old. Narcissa was painfully reminded where she had received this necklace. It was a few months before Lucius had decided where his loyalties laid. It was one of those evenings in spring where the sun settled late and the breeze was warm and gentle. Lucius used to be quite spontaneous and had whisked Narcissa away to a secluded area in their grounds. They laid on a blanket just talking and kissing for hours. Just after Lucius said, "I love you" for about the twelfth time, he pulled the necklace out from behind him and softly placed it around her neck saying, "may these sparkle brightly like my eyes sparkle eveytime I see you".
Narcissa felt the sudden urge to go cut, but it was 7.50pm and nearly time to apparate. A quick glance in the mirror assured her that she looked stunning she then set off to the study to meet her husband.
His eyes quickly checked over making sure that Narcissa approved. She could tell that he had forgotten all about the necklace, not that it bothered her anymore.
Lucius spoke as he seized her wrist, "if you dare stain our name, you will pay. Dare talk about anything to do with the Dark Lord, you will suffer. You are aristocracy, act like it"
Narcissa hadn't been out of the mansion in months. It was like a breath of fresh air to be somewhere that didn't remind her of her past, present or future. Narcissa arrived with a first true smile on her face; but the prospect of it staying all night wasn't promising.
Having to spend the first half of the night right beside Lucius, and enduring comments like "Narcissa darling you look amazing, oh what would life be like to be like you!" and "you two would have to be the best looking couple around!" She took these comments down with a lot of champagne. What if people really knew what went on inside her mind? The demons she constantly had to battle every day and the husband she had to stand by loyally. He wasn't even human anymore. Even at this ball he was going to be negotiating bribes and money. It was all about power yet again wasn't it?
Narcissa stared at a handsome couple for quite some time. She didn't know why. She thought that maybe people used to gaze at her and Lucius like that some eighteen years ago like she was now. The couple were just engrossed with each other, like nothing else mattered. Narcissa felt a twinge in her stomach and hurriedly walked to the ladies room. In the privacy of her own toilet cubicle, she was on her knees, face in the toilet bowl purging the contents of her stomach into it. Narcissa sat on the toilet for what felt like hours. Tears were slowly dripping into her champagne glass. She was silently crying out for help but there was no one to help her. It was times like this where Narcissa had to constantly remind herself that what ever was in the past had and would stay there. Nothing would ever change back.
With that thought in mind, Narcissa unclipped her black purse and pulled out two things, her diary and a silver blade. She knew that cutting would only cause her trouble and awkward questions so she quickly put that back in her purse. She then began to write,
I constantly remind myself that I don't love him. I didn't love him yesterday or the day before but when I am reminded of the past, the past we spent together, I suddenly urge for things to change. Should this still happen? It's been eighteen years of no looking back, pain and torture. Why am I so weak? Am I even allowed to hope? Maybe I should stop being so selfish. Of course my main hope is that my son, my only son Draco never turns out to be like his father is now. To never follow in his footsteps and become a power-hungry monster like him.
Narcissa returned to the ball, ready to swallow more praised comments from various people and to pretend to exist in a life that was perfect.
A/N- this chapter, the writing is a bit different as you can probably tell; it was hard trying to capture situations for Narcissa to be in. I hope that you enjoyed it and reviewing would be greatly appreciated!