Disclaimer: If you can't realise what belongs to Rowling and Whedon, and what's part of my imagination, then what are you doing here?

Summary: 'As Percy shook the hand of Penelope's two-meters-tall new beau, he thought the word "awkward" had been given a whole new meaning.' Percy reflects on his love life (or lack of thereof) in past, present, and maybe future tense.

Awkward

Present tense:(1/3)

It happened so fast, that Percy wasn't certain whether he'd dreamed it or not. One moment, they were laughing at the horrendous attempts at singing a sappy song of Celestina Warbeck by an old hag. The next, she leant on and kissed him.

Admittedly, they'd had quite a few beers. Not nearly enough to be drunk, but quite. Leprechaun's Gold had been celebrating: it'd been the first time they played on a real stage. Actually, it was a small wooden platform in a quite unknown pub, but they weren't high-maintenance.

It was only natural that they all had been in a high mood, which still did not explain how come Naoise had ended up kissing him. Not like in that precise moment he felt bothered at all, honestly. Although it came as a bit of a shock to him when she pulled away, smiled and headed towards the bar as if nothing had happened. He didn't see her for the rest of the night.

Percy wondered what was going on. Until that very night, he and Naoise had been nothing but friends. Perhaps he could have held a thought or two about her that couldn't be defined as "strictly friendly", which was excusable as Naoise was quite a stunning woman. Truth to be told, though, he'd never thought he stood a chance in hell. He was painfully aware that pretty, charismatic girls like Naoise Lannigan were way out of her league.

In spite of it all, she'd been the one who had kissed him, not viceversa. It had to mean something. The only problem was that Percy couldn't figure out what it meant.

He couldn't help wondering whether this would change, for better or for worse, the relationship he had with Naoise. Before of the rehearsal the band had the following day, Percy gave the subject a thought. Well, perhaps more than a thought. Let's just say that Percy Weasley had long ago discovered that he had an unfortunate knack for overanalysing things, and this was no exception.

What had the kiss meant, anyway? Naoise had to like him, right? Or had it just been a spur of the moment thing? Perhaps she was drunker than he had thought at first and things would get dreadfully awkward...

And if she did like him, a dozen other questions arose. Of course, first he had to think about whether he did like her or not

Which is, I am sad to say, the most moronic question I had the misfortune to hear in a long time.

and how he was supposed to act around her from now on. Was he supposed to ask her for a date or something? Or just wait for her to make the next move?

God, Perce, what a dork you can be. For some reason, in times like this it was always Faith's voice the one that echoed in his head, or Bill's. On the other hand, when he was about to do something wrong – which happened in very rare occasions – it was his mother the one who seemed to talk inside his skull. It was nothing short of eerie.

When Naoise received him at the warehouse where they rehearsed, he gave her what he was afraid to be a sheepish smile. Well, at least he wasn't blushing. At least, he hoped so.

Merlin, the voices in my head are right. I'm truly lame.

She smiled somewhat distractedly and waved a hand at the instruments.

'Lend me a hand with the Sound Charms. The others haven't come yet.'

Percy was, for a very awkward moment, frozen on his spot at her indifference. He reacted, always the gentleman, and helped her out with the preparation of the instruments. In all the time they were alone, they barely exchanged ten words. Percy was starting to feel rather clueless. Was she upset for what had happened? How could she, if she'd been the one who'd kissed him? Unless...

Merlin, am I such a terrible kisser?

Some higher being must like him, though, as the awkward moment didn't last for long: soon the other members of the band joined them and the rehearsal started. All the time, Naoise just laughed and chatted with everyone, including him, as if nothing had happened. He began to wonder whether he hadn't really imagined the whole episode and to question his sanity.

Percy realised he needed some advice, the only matter was where he would get it from. Andrew and Oliver, his best friends, were sadly out of question. They didn't know Naoise at all and besides, they didn't have much more experience with women than he did. Actually, he suspected that Andrew had even less experience and as far as Oliver was concerned and depite having half of the female population at Slayer's School drooling over him, he could be quite clueless on the subject himself.

Of the members of the band, he wasn't going to ask Laoise, as it would be far too embarassing. The chances were that she would go straight to her sister and spill everything. Black Eye wasn't the talkative or sharing type, so the only option left was Riley.

Once he'd finished referring his story, Riley was shaking his head.

'Mate, you've got it all wrong.'

Percy frowned. 'What do you mean?'

Riley shifted on his seat. 'Well... you look like a nice enough bloke and everythin', but birds like Naoise... they don't exactly look for commitment and lasting relationships, do they?'

'So?'

Riley stared at him. He hesitated, as though he was trying to choose the right words.

'Well, no offence mate, but you look like the kind of bloke who starts planning the wedding on the first date, with the church, the bridemaids and everythin'. That sort of thing just panics birds like Naoise.'

'I don't...'

But Percy's voice tailed off as he remembered one of the things Penelope used to mock him about:

'Baby, stop planning our whole future while we're still at Hogwarts... I don't think that sixteen is the right age to start deciding how many children we'll have...'

Penelope, he decided, was not a subject he wanted to dwell in right now, so he hurried to change the topic and at once asked Riley about the new album of a rival band. Certain things were better left in the past...

...if the past let him.

-

It was a grey afternoon in London, and Vi and Percy were heading towards the School after accomplishing an assigment for Wesley, which involved retrieving a couple of ancient scrolls... without the owner's authorization, and thus Vi's presence was explained.

They had come out quite unscathed from the whole ordeal, so they were chattering with more enthusiasm Percy would have hoped when Wesley had first assigned them to the task. Vi was telling him details of her childhood in Oklahoma, before the shadow of The First had come to somber her life, and Percy was listening attentively, hoping she would not ask him about his own childhood. It wasn't a subject he was willing to talk about right now. It wasn't like it had been unhappy at all – actually, it'd been the best time of his life – but that would bring back the memories of his family and that was just too depressing for his mood today.

As he watched her wave her hands as she spoke, Percy thought Vi reminded him of somebody, but he couldn't put his finger on it. There was, though, something oddly familiar in her lively ways and her frankness that made him feel rather comfortable. Perhaps because of this, before he realised what he was doing, Percy found himself telling her about Naoise, and what Riley had said about her. Once he was finished, Vi had a slight frown on her forehead and she looked deep in thought.

'I know this is gonna sound dumb but... haven't you tried asking her?' Vi put a strand of red hair out of her face. 'I mean, perhaps this guy doesn't know her that well... perhaps she acted on impulse and then she expected you to make the first move... She could be too insecure to do so herself.'

Before he could stop himself, Percy chortled. 'Insecure? Vi, I doubt there can be a girl who is less insecure than Naoise Lannigan.'

The girl merely shrugged. 'You never know. She might be trying to hide it under a mask of self-confidence. Many people do that.'

Percy turned to stare at her in awe, wondering when the younger girl had developed such wisdom. Perhaps because he wasn't looking where he was heading, he bumped against something very tall and very solid. Fortunately, Vi's superb reflexes prevented him from falling on his bottom, which he would be particularly thankful for afterwards.

Percy's gaze slowly went up and a his craned his neck upwards he saw a massive, twenty-something-year-old man in front of him.

'Um, I'm really sorry about that, I'm afraid I wasn't paying attention to where I was going...'

The man glowered and towered over him. It took Percy a conscious effort not to shrink. Get a grip, After all, you work against vampires and other equally evil creatures... and you're quite tall yourself. Although, admittedly, not nearly as tall as the hafl-giant in front of him.

The man straightened the sleeves of his blue suit as he gave him a cold glare.

'That's evident.'

His voice was low and grave, as if Percy had committed some kind of felony. Now he came to think of it, Percy would have probably been very annoyed himself if someone had ruined his clothes when he was dressed up so fancily. Not like that was the case for him in that precise moment: he couldn't have looked more worn out after all he and Vi had just gone through to retrieve those thrice-damned scrolls.

'Baby, take it easy. It was just an accident...'

For the first time, Percy noticed the considerably shorter, equally fancily dressed young woman that was standing next to the human mountain. She was erasing the wrinkles on the man's coat, and as her head moved the sun made her brown curls to sparkle.

Percy choked. No way...

Everyone turned to look at him with puzzled expressions on their faces. The woman's brown eyes widened in surprise.

'Percy? Is it you?'

'Er...' Last time I bothered to check, I was '...yeah.'

She blinked, and at once her shock turned into a polite mask.

'Wow, it's certainly been a long time. You look,' she bit her lip, dubious, 'well, different.'

You mean, as a train had run over me?

He noted that Penelope Clearwater, because it was her ex-girlfriend whom he'd just had the misfortune to bump into, was casting a questioning look towards Vi. Clearing his throat, Percy proceeded to make the proper introductions. Or whatever he was supposed to do in such a bizarre situation.

'Vi, this is Penelope, surely I told you about her,' only Merlin would know how hard it was for him not to call her "Penny" all over again, 'and Penelope, this is...'

Percy hesitated a moment. How would he explain who Vi was? They weren't supposed to give away the existence of the Slayer's School. Fortunately, Vi was a quick-thinker.

'His cousin. From the States.'

Penelope frowned and turned to Percy, an inquiring look on her face. 'You never mentioned you had a cousin in USA.'

Percy shrugged. 'You know how big my family is...' In a sudden need to change the subject, Percy turned to the lamp-post (well, the incredibly tall and muscular bloke standing next to Penelope, anyway) and said in a rush:

'Haven't we met before? Because you look somewhat familiar to me...'

The man looked down at Percy, studying him.

'I doubt it. I would've remembered a face like yours.'

Percy preferred not to dwell in what he might have meant and instead turned to Penelope, who'd just placed a languid hand on her man's arm.

'Oh, you must've seen him on the Prophet... Darryl's a well-known Quidditch player...'

Percy's eyes widened. Since when was Penelope interested in sports?

Well, at least now he had something to tell Oliver, anyway.

'Really? For which team are you playing now?'

"Darryl" tilted his head to one side, as though he was trying to decide whether Percy was worthy of getting an answer.

'The Puddlemere United. As a Keeper.'

Percy blinked, surprised. 'Wait... That was the position Oliver played...'

The man frowned. 'You mean Wood, right?' He let out a derisive laugh. 'Do you know him? Among us, professional Quidditch players, he is famous for the way he threw all his career away... A shame, he could have become a more or less decent player in time... not for such an important team as the Puddlemere, but perhaps the Cannons...'

Percy incensed at the insult at Oliver. A more or less decent player! Percy might not know much about Quidditch, but everyone had always said that Oliver was a hell of a good player. And the comment about the Chudley Cannons... what was that supposed to mean, anyway?

Perhaps sensing something was off, Penelope hastened to say:

'Oh, I can't believe I've been so tactless! Let me introduce you: Darryl, baby, this is Percy Weasley, one of my classmates at Hogwarts...'

Percy's mouth went dry as his insides boiled. They'd dated for nearly four years, and she introduced him as a mere 'classmate'? What was she playing at?

Darryl raised his eyebrows. 'Oh, yes. Penny's told me about you.'

Percy made a feeble attempt to smile, but it came out more like a grimace than anything else. Penelope acted as if she'd noticed nothing and beamed broadly.

'Percy, this is Darryl Milkovich... my boyfriend.'

He didn't know why he felt so utterly shocked, as though he'd been doused with icy water. After all, hadn't she called him "baby", hadn't she caressed his arm flirtatiously, hadn't she been beaming at that massive, troll-like jerk during their whole conversation?

Vi's elbow on his ribs brought him back to his senses, and at once Percy was in glacial-pompous full mode, just like when he'd worked at the Ministry and had to receive people such as Lucius Malfoy.

'Oh, it's a pleasure to meet you,' he said in a colourless tone.

As Percy shook the hand of Penelope's two-meters-tall new beau, he thought the word "awkward" had been given a whole new meaning. Penelope was the one to break the uneasy silence that had fallen upon them.

'What were you doing around here? We've just come from my parents house – they've been delighted with Darryl, isn't it right, baby?'

Percy remembered that Penelope's parents were Muggles, which explained the couple's clothes and the reason they were walking around a Muggle neighbourhood. Unfortunately, he was too caught up at the irony of Penelope's last words – her parents, for some unfathomable reason, had never liked him much – to make up a plausible excuse to explain why he was in that hood when it was known that Death Eaters would attack any wizard they caught in Muggle clothing.

Once again, he was thankful Vi was right there with him.

'Really? That sounds lovely.' She gave Penelope a bright smile. 'It's too bad we can't stay to chat... the jewellery is going to close any minute now...'

'The jewellery,' Penelope inquired, her curiosity obviously piqued. Percy didn't blame her; he was wondering what on earth Vi was talking about himself. Vi's smile became even brighter, until it got a little scary.

'Oh, Percy's gonna show me the necklace he wants to buy for Naoise...' Vi lowered her voice dramatically as Percy stared at her in disbelief, '...you know, as it's his first anniversary he wants to make it very special... But I've told him that anything he picks will be alright for her... It's not like she'd snobbish or anything, she's so nice, the whole family adores her...'She grabbed Percy's arm. 'But, if we don't start moving, we'll never get there. Nice to meet you two. See you!'

And without further ado, she dragged Percy away as Penelope's jaw fell open. As they turned around the corner, Percy cast one last glance over his shoulder and saw the incredulity and utter shock drawn on Penelope's features, whereas her boyfriend glared at her back.

'What was all that for?'

Vi merely shrugged. 'The whole thing had gotten a lil' too uncomfortable for my taste, mind you.'

They were sitting at the small office he shared with Oliver and Andrew, eating an earned ice-cream after they had given Wesley the scrolls and their reports. Percy frowned, but the girl kept taking spoonfuls of chocolate ice-cream into her mouth.

'I meant the part Naoise and me were in our first anniversary, which is a little surprising as I wasn't aware we were even dating.'

Vi swallowed the ice-cream that filled her mouth and smiled mischievously.

'Well, I couldn't stand the way she was standing there with her arms flung around that dork, rubbing the fact she'd gotten a new boyfriend on your nose. I thought she deserved the same treatment.'

Percy stared at her, astonished, and then burst into laughter.

'I see. It didn't seem to me that she was trying to rub it on my nose, as you put it...'

'Oh, believe me, she was showing off. Honestly, Percy, no offence but... what did you see in her? She's so snobbish!'

He was nothing short of bewildered at her words. Penelope had never come across him as a snob kind of person. Now he thought about it, though, he remembered that some of her female classmates used to mutter behind her back, accusing her of being arrogant... He'd always dismissed those comments, assuming those girls were just jealous at Penelope's brilliance... but, of course, he'd been rather stuck-up back then himself, hadn't he?

'She wouldn't have suited you in the long run,' Vi said wisely. 'I'm sure that Naoise is much better for you than Lil' Miss Snobbish.'

Percy couldn't help laughing again. 'Vi, you don't even know Naoise.'

'I don't need to,' she replied, unabashed. 'Someone who goes around with blue hair must have a lot of personality and probably humour sense. That's much better than having a nose stuck in the clouds, isn't it?'

This time, both of them roared with laughter and Percy nearly choked with ice-cream if such a thing was possible. When they stopped and he'd calmed himself down, he remembered something else.

'How did you come out with the cousin lie so quickly?'

'Well, it's a classic, isn't it?' Suddenly, Vi looked serious. She dropped her spoon on her bowl, apparently lost in thought. 'You know, you kinda remind me of him...'

Percy leant forward, looking at her curiously. 'Of whom, Vi?'

His voice seemed to snap her back to reality.

'Oh, my cousin, Kyle. We were pretty close as we grew up, he always took care of me...' Percy remembered Vi mentioning him once or twice before, always with fondness and the slightest hint of sadness. 'I haven't seen him since I went to Sunnydale...'

They were silent for a moment, Vi seemingly lost in past memories of happier times. Then she straightened in her seat and flung her read hair out of her face, as if she were trying to wipe away the sad thoughts. A little more cheerful, she resumed the devouring of the ice-cream with enthusiasm. Percy, though, kept staring at her. The way she'd flung the hair out of her face... Suddenly, he knew who Vi reminded him of, and why Oliver's and Andrew's jokes about Vi's supposed crush on him had sounded so wrong and irksome at the time.

'You're just like her,' he whispered. Vi looked up.

'Just like whom?'

'My sister, Ginny. That's whom you remind me of. We... we haven't talked in quite a while.'

Vi toyed with her spoon, thoughtfully.

'Then it's good we have each other, isn't it? We're family now.'

Author's Notes: I'm so sorry. I never thought it would take this long to update, but I've just been so caught up with other fics and school and everything... Hope the wait's been worth it?

The second chapter will be up in a week... and this time, it's a promise!