Chapter 5

Kaoru shook Kenshin's shoulder gently, trying to wake him. "Kenshin. Anata, wake up."

He shifted and yawned, his violet eyes fluttering open. "Kaoru," he murmured. "Ohayou koishii."

She smiled at him. "Come on tora, it's time for breakfast."

Kenshin allowed her to help him sit up, but when she looped his arm over her shoulder she paused. "Help me Kenshin."

He looked at her in shock. "Nani?"

She was dead serious. "Help me."

"Demo koneko, I can't feel my legs." Kenshin stuttered. "How am I to help you?"

She focused determined sapphire eyes on him. "I want you to try. You said you would try nearly 2 weeks ago, and you have been, but it's time to get a little more serious."

Kenshin watched her with shocked eyes, and then set his face determinedly. He looked down, focusing all of his will on moving his legs. "Nothing's happening…" he said sadly after a moment. "Gomen…"

Kaoru sighed as she saw sorrow creep into Kenshin's violet eyes. "Don't be sorry tora; I'm proud of you for trying." She helped him into the chair, which waited beside the futon, giving him a kiss on his scarred cheek.

He smiled at her, but she could tell that it was not his true smile. She pushed him into the kitchen where Yahiko and Sano were sitting at the table.

Yahiko was still too asleep, and he simply yawned, but Sano grinned at his friend. "Ohayou Kenshin."

Kenshin nodded back to him, smiling at Kaoru as she gave him his food. "Arigatou."

Kaoru watched the redhead as she ate. Finally she couldn't take the silence. "Kenshin, daijoubu?"

He glanced at her. "I'm fine Kaoru, why do you ask?"

"You've hardly touched your food," she said worriedly, standing to go to his side. She missed the flash of envy in his eyes as she walked to him.

He looked down at the bowl in his lap as she approached. "I'm not hungry."

She frowned, kneeling by his cheek. "I don't believe you." He looked at her, startled. "Kenshin, what are you doing to yourself? You're losing too much weight anata, and it's worrying me."

Kenshin's crimson bangs fell forwards to hide his violet eyes. "Gomen nasai…"

Kaoru pulled him close, setting her chin on top of his head. "Oh Kenshin… You've got to stop beating yourself up, it's not your fault." She was shocked when his body trembled in her arms. "Kenshin?"

Sano sensed the imminent happenings and grabbed Yahiko, pulling him from the room. 'We'll leave those two alone…' he thought.

Kaoru leaned back from Kenshin and was shocked to see his shoulders shaking and tears streaming down his cheeks. "Kenshin, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

He buried his face in his hands, trying to hide his tears. "I feel so helpless Kaoru! I can't do anything to help you, and nothing is happening! I still can't feel my legs!"

Kaoru instantly drew him close again, letting him cry into her kimono front. "Don't say that Kenshin! I know you can overcome this, and you're still helping me around the dojo!"

He looked up at her with a tear-stained face. "But what if we were attacked? I can't defend you, I couldn't keep you safe, and I could never live with myself if something happened to you!"

Kaoru held him at arms length. "And I love you for that Kenshin, I really do. But I'm a big girl, I can defend myself. And we've got Sano here, he's a big help and you know it."

Kenshin shook his head frantically. "But I'm supposed to protect you, but I can't because I'm so helpless! I can't even stand Kaoru, I'm a worthless person that just sits there and does nothing, a stupi—"

Kaoru sighed, watching as he simply stared at the wall. His head had been snapped to the side by the force of her slap, his right cheek red where she had hit him. His eyes were wide, pain faintly seen in them, and tears were still leaking down his face. Kaoru reached over gently and took his face in between her hands, turning him to look at her. "Kenshin, I don't ever want to hear those words from your mouth again. If I do, I'll hit you harder than that."

Kenshin simple stared at her, eyes wide and shocked. His mouth was open slightly, as though he wanted to say something, but just couldn't. "I…"

She shook her head, a single tear falling down her pale face. "Iie Kenshin, don't. I know very well what you want to say, and I don't want to hear it. You will never be any less then the man that I love, the only person I want here with me, and nothing could ever change that."

Kenshin's eyes flicked down, away from her concerned face. "Kaoru…"

She stopped his words by leaning forward and pressing her lips into his. For an instant his eyes were wide and shocked, and then they closed as he surrendered to the kiss. He allowed her to have control, letting her kiss him thoroughly. She pulled back to rest her forehead against his. "You must understand Kenshin, I will always be here by your side, and I wouldn't have it any other way."

He sighed, and then closed his eyes. "I'm sorry Kaoru; I don't know what came over me."

She shook her head. "It's fine. I don't mind. Everyone has little emotional breakdowns every now and then."

He kissed her gently. "Aishiteru…" His voice was husky, a tone that made Kaoru want to shiver, but she knew very well that nothing would happen. With Kenshin's current condition anyway…

She smiled. "Aishiteru mo my tora." She heard Sano's voice humming outside the room and she shook her head slightly, drying Kenshin's tears with soft fingers. "I'm afraid you still look like you cried Kenshin."

He sighed. His fair skin was stained red, violet eyes red-rimmed and bloodshot. "That would be my complexion fighting back at me." She giggled lightly and he grinned. "Well, I'd rather go back into my room anyway. You tell those two that they can come back in, and we'll go work on my legs."

She blinked as he turned and rolled himself from the room. Kenshin had never asked for her to work with his legs, she had always initiated the exercises. This was improvement, and she smiled. "You two can come back and eat now."

She left them to their meal, going back through the hall to where Kenshin's room was. He smiled lightly at her as she entered, having folded his blanket and set in on his futon. She settled down beside him, and began the now daily ritual of massaging Kenshin's leg muscles.