Time Enough For Tears

by Rhiana Rae

Stephanie and Joe finally call it quits. Joe turns to Terry Gilman and Stephanie turns to Tastykakes. And Ranger. Another chapter in the life of the Bombshell Bounty Hunter. Written in the same format as the books.

8. The Hardest Day

Time Enough For Tears Chapter Eight- The Hardest Day

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"The Hardest Day"- by The Corrs

One more day, one last look
Before I leave it all behind
And play the role that's meant for us
That said we'd say goodbye

One more night by your side
Where our dreams collide
And all we have is everything
And there's no pain there's no hurt
There's no wrong it's all right

If I promise to believe will you believe
That there's nowhere that we'd rather be
Nowhere describes where we are
I've no choice, I love you
Leave, love, you wave goodbye

And all I ever wanted was to stay
And nothing in this world's gonna change

Never wanna wake up from this night
Never wanna leave this moment
Waiting for you only, only you
Never gonna forget every single thing you do
When loving you is my finest hour
Leaving you, the hardest day of my life
The hardest day of my life

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Chapter Eight- The Hardest Day

Slowly, my vision swam back into focus. There were voices all around me. Too many people in my apartment. At least, I thought I was in my apartment. I chanced a look around. Dimly I realized I could see out of my right eye now. There was hell behind my eyelids. My body was on fire. Everything hurt, and it was extremely hard to turn my head more than a fraction of an inch any one direction.

I was wrapped in the fluffy quilt from my bed, on my couch. Someone must have put me there, because the last I remembered I was on the floor.

I saw Ranger standing across the room, talking to Eddie Gazarra. Tank was talking to Eddie's partner, Big Dog. I struggled to sit up, and pain exploded through my body. I felt weak all of a sudden, and thought better of it. Maybe laying down was okay after all. I did a semi-conscious check of my body. Nothing felt broken. That would be miraculous after those steel-toed boots. Later I would attribute it to the bone-strengthening calcium of Tastykakes. But for now, I was content to close my eyes and float along.

I got the whirlies and opened my eyes again. Ranger looked over at me and said something to Eddie before crossing the room. I couldn't think of anything to say, so I just looked at him. He reached out and tucked a curl behind my ear, trailing his finger along my chin. "Babe," he said.

He might have said more, but I don't remember. I slid back into unconsciousness once more.

When next I awoke it was to subdued light. I was in some sort of vehicle. An ambulance, because there was a paramedic crouched over me, holding an iv bag. Ranger sat on my left, and on my right was Morelli. He must have gotten a phone call from one of the police officers.

"Hey, Cupcake," Morelli said.

They were both looking at me. Both attempted a smile, but neither was very successful. I must really look bad, I thought, and passed out again.

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Sunlight cast a dappled pattern on my bed. I blinked my eyes a few times and stared at the ceiling. Stark white. Extremely clean. No cobwebs. I was definitely not in my apartment. I thought maybe I could sit up, but I remembered sharp pains from the last time and decided not to. My whole body still ached, but everything was a little fuzzy. I was probably on some kind of pain medication.

A brilliant idea hit me. I was in a hospital. Hospitals have those neat up-down beds. And there was usually a remote… Aha! I found it, and pushed a button without craning my neck around to look at it. The tv came on. Shit. I pushed that button again and the tv went off. I pushed another button, and the bed tilted upwards a few degrees.

I started at the sight of Ranger sitting in a chair beside the bed. He looked like the same old Ranger, but there was a tiredness about him. No big circles under his eyes, but his face was a bit drawn, and his t-shirt was a little rumpled. It didn't look like it was a fresh one. Maybe he hadn't been home yet. He was looking at me like he was mildly surprised that I was awake.

"Yo," I said, my voice croaky. This got me a small smile.

"Yo, yourself," he said, mimicking my usual response to him. I finally got to say 'yo' first. Yay for me.

"How long have I been out?" I stifled a yawn and it hurt my head.

Ranger looked at his watch. "About thirty-seven hours," he said. "They moved you out of ICU about five hours ago." He stood up, grabbed a tray to his right and pushed it close to the bed. "Thirsty?"

My tongue was stuck to the roof of my mouth and I sounded like Kermit the Frog with strep throat. I nodded.

He grabbed a little pink pitcher and poured some water into a glass. A straw was already tucked in it. I struggled to sit up, but I was pretty woozy, so I slunk back down in the warm bed. Ranger shook his head with a smile, and held the straw to my lips.

The first sip was instantly absorbed by my mouth and parched throat. I sucked down three more before he took the straw away. "Easy, babe," he said, setting the glass back down. "You don't want too much on your stomach at once."

"You saved me," I pointed out. My voice was soft. I had a room to myself but I didn't want to take chances. "You killed them, didn't you?"

Ranger was silent. He just looked at me with those dark mysterious eyes.

"Thank you," I said, not knowing what exactly was appropriate to say to someone who bloodied their hands for you. This was the second time Ranger had killed someone to protect me. Right now Eddie Abruzzi seemed years ago.

Ranger nodded, once, almost imperceptibly. Just enough to let me know that it was okay, and that I was okay. It was more than I expected.

Feeling a little better, I watched him. Maybe it was the pain drugs that made me ask stupid questions. That was my best explanation.

"Where's Joe?" I didn't see him anywhere around, but I remembered him being in the ambulance.

"He had to stay at the station for a while. Fill some paperwork out. Work out a few glitches." I knew what those glitches were. Someday I would try to understand the strange working dynamic between Morelli and Ranger. There was definitely rivalry there, but it seemed that they could put all that aside and work as a team. At least, when I was involved. Which was often. Argh.

I took a moment to take stock of myself. I was in one of those little gowns that your butt hangs out of. My arms were solid bruises, icky purple and black ones. My lip was swollen and painful. Likely a cut there. My forehead burned, and I raised my hand to it. Bandaged. Wonderful. Probably got split open when that steel-toed boot made contact with it. I knew a moment of sheer euphoria when I saw there were no casts on me.

"It was mostly internal stuff they were worried about," Ranger said, still watching me. "Internal bleeding, spinal cord damage, concussion. They didn't hit your head more than the one time, so you didn't have a concussion. For a while, they thought you might have gone into a coma." His voice was extremely tight, and I chanced a look at his face.

Stony. Not giving anything away. He stopped speaking after that. I didn't want to guess why.

"I'm sorry," I said.

His head jerked up. "What?"

I cleared my throat a little. "I said, I'm sorry."

Ranger shook his head, smiling. "This time it really wasn't your fault, babe." He rubbed his forehead and his pager beeped. He glanced at the read-out and cleared it. I didn't bother asking.

"How's Tank?"

Ranger grinned. "Pissed off. And embarrassed. Thought I was going to kill him, too, for getting taken by surprise like that." His expression darkened considerably. "And for letting them get to you."

I was speechless. This was an undercurrent of something. I detected serious amounts of what could possibly have been worry and care all wrapped up in one quiet little statement. Damn Morphine, anyway.

"But I'm okay," I said, trying to sound perky. But I really wasn't. I was terrified, even now, in this hospital. Likely, it would pass with the pain from the injuries, but at the moment I didn't want to be alone. I had been violated, and beaten, and I was tired.

Ranger shook his head. "Liar." He gestured to a bag in the corner. "I went back to your apartment last night and got clothes for you, and other stuff I thought you might need. They're going to keep you at least tonight to make sure you're okay."

I didn't want to be in the hospital another night. But then, I really didn't want to go back to my apartment, either.

"A cleaning crew went through your apartment this morning. The place is squeaky. You'll need to go down to the station in the next few days and make your statement. Or I can have them come here," he said.

I sighed. This was the part I hated most. "Have them come here. My mom will have a plotz when she finds out about this."

A corner of his mouth quirked. "She already knows."

I groaned. Please, no.

Ranger went on. "Morelli and I have been keeping them updated. The hospital isn't allowing you visitors."

"Then how did you get in here?" I asked, attempting to narrow my eyes again. Pain sliced through my right eye and I winced. Ranger caught it, too.

He just smiled.

"Fine," I huffed. "By mysterious. I'm only in a hospital bed, after all. I mean, I could have died, but no, don't tell me--"

Ranger was out of his chair and over me in an instant. I stiffened instinctively, but he just took my hand, very gently. "Don't ever say that, babe," he said, his eyes extremely dark. We looked at each other for a few minutes, and then I looked down at my hand in his. This man had saved my life twice now.

My eyes filled, and before I could blink them back tears spilled down my cheeks. I was a mess, a whiny mess, and just now I didn't care. I wanted to feel safe, and I wanted to be the one without the problems and the scary life.

Ranger tipped my chin up when I tried to turn my head away. I looked at him through wide, wounded eyes, not caring if I looked like a weak sissy. I think I earned it. "Think of a happy memory," he said suddenly, and I blinked at him.

"Close your eyes, and think of a happy memory," he repeated. Okay, I could do that.

"Got one," I said, focusing on it.

"Now put yourself there. Concentrate on what you feel, and what you see, and what you hear."

I smiled. Shit, now I was getting turned on. My emotions were completely out of whack. But I felt better. "Wow," I said, opening my eyes. "That really works."

Ranger just stood there. I wondered if he wondered what my memory had been. Well, I wasn't telling.

"Do you want me to call Morelli?" he asked.

I shook my head. "I don't want to see him right now."

"He's worried about you."

"Yeah, well, join the club," I said. I couldn't face Morelli now, not like this. And now I needed to go to the bathroom. Indignity upon indignity. But I wasn't hooked up to an IV, so that would make things easier. At least my room had a private bathroom. "Um, do you think you could turn around?" I really didn't relish the idea of mooning him all the way across the room.

"Be careful when you stand up," he said, turning his back. "You've been laying down for a while. Might want to sit up first."

Good point. So I tried to sit up. Little bells clanged in my head and dots danced in front of my eyes. I grabbed onto the rail for support and closed my eyes until the commotion went away. When I opened them again Ranger was standing beside the bed. I raised my eyebrow at him, but that hurt too so I put it back down.

"Nothing I haven't seen before, babe."

"Well, you don't have to look so damn smug about it," I snapped. Okay, so he really didn't look that smug. I hated being vulnerable. Unacceptable.

Ranger dropped the railing on the side of the bed and stepped back.

I put one foot, then another, on the cool floor. I was wearing socks. Someone must have put them on me. Gingerly, I tested the weight on my bones and found that, at least, didn't hurt too bad. However, when I tried to stand all the way up, my vision tunneled and then went black. Ranger caught me on the way down, and lifted me easily.

Next thing I know he deposited me on the toilet seat. "This is so not dignified," I said, frowning. My cheeks were flaming, and my heart was in danger of bouncing out of my chest and running far, far away. My mother was right. I was a trial. I also figured that when Lula and Connie asked about my hospital visit, I would leave this little piece of information out. Permanently. I may even forget about it. Like right now.

Ranger grinned at me and closed the door. I flushed the toilet and looked in the mirror. Yikes. This was not sex-kitten hair, that was for sure. My left eye was black, and my forehead was swollen above my right eye. It had been split open, just as I'd thought. I sighed, and managed to wash my hands before he opened the door again. This time I had my feet under me a little more than before, and with some assistance managed to walk across the room under my own steam. Boy, getting the crap beat out of you really does a number on your energy reserves, I thought.

The door opened and a short round nurse bustled in. I don't know why, but nurses always bustle. They always have brillo pad hair and no ankles, and they bustle. Since I was a kid and had to go to the doctor after I jumped off the roof trying to fly, I've had this theory.

This particular nurse was a lot nicer than that last one, however. She smiled at me up and walking around. "You gave us a fright, young lady. Weren't sure you were going to wake up." She came right up to my face and stuck a thermometer in my mouth. I looked to Ranger for help, but he shrugged and held his hands palm-up in a helpless gesture.

The round woman kept bustling around me, looking at my bruises. She nudged me into a chair and peeled the bandage off my forehead. Her tongue clucked and I winced. Now she was reminding me of my mother. Holy crap. "It's good that you're up and walking around, then," she said, pulling the thermometer out. "Ah, normal. That's a good sign, too, miss." She glanced at Ranger and blushed to the roots of her hair.

"That's a fine gentleman you've got yourself there, young lady. He never left your side, not once, even while you were in ICU." I gaped at Ranger, but his expression didn't change. Oblivious, the nurse continued. "'Course, we don't usually let visitors into ICU when a patient's in that condition, but he was very insistent."

She stopped and gave me a sympathetic look. "But after what you went through it was a small thing to ask." Her eyes glanced over my arms and lingered on my black eye. Then she tut-tutted again and refilled my water pitcher. "You'll stay here again tonight, just for observation, and if all goes well, we'll release you in the morning," she said, smiled at me again, and bustled out the door.

"They always bustle," I murmured, and heard Ranger chuckle. I was lingering on the vision I had of Ranger, staying by my side for thirty-seven straight hours. That was…I didn't know. It was something, though. Maybe the pain drugs again.

"Maybe you should lay down again," he said. "You're looking a little tired."

I shook my head. "No. The more I stand up the better I feel. My legs are almost working again." It was hard to walk around much, though. I couldn't turn my back on Ranger because of the stupid gown.

"I brought a big t-shirt and a pair of your boxers that I found," Ranger said, retrieving my duffel bag from the floor.

"How do you do that?"

He looked at me, blank-faced. "Read my mind. All the time."

That got me the smile. "I could tell you…"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, but you'd have to kill me," I said, taking the clothes he offered me. I stopped. "I miss Rex," I said. "No one's taking care of Rex. He's all alone in my apartment."

I think I looked like I might bolt, because Ranger put his hand on my shoulder. "It's okay," he said, and when I began to breathe normally he reached around the privacy curtain they used for exams. He pulled out Rex's little aquarium, and I think I might have squealed.

Ranger set the aquarium on the rolling tray and shook his head at me.

Rex rushed out of his soup can, black eyes flicking this way and that. His whiskers twitched a million miles an hour. "Poor Rex," I said.

I looked over to find Ranger giving me that look. The 'oh you sad woman' look. "What?" I demanded. "I'm his mother. He needs me." To which Rex hunkered back down into his soup can and went promptly to sleep.

"Stupid hamster anyway," I grumbled.

Ranger laughed out loud.

The door opened again, and the same nurse came in, carrying a food tray. "Dinner time," she trilled, and despite the fact that it was hospital food my stomach growled. Loudly. Ranger must have heard it, because he raised that damn eyebrow at me again.

The nurse set the tray on the table, took one last look at Ranger, and hurried out. I swear I saw her fanning herself.

"I'm starving," I said, as I took the lid off the tray. "One word and you're a dead man."

"My lips are sealed."

There were mashed potatoes, some hunk of what looked like it could be meat, slathered in what I hoped to God was brown gravy. Also there was a dish of mixed vegetables (ick), and a dinner roll. Okay, so I wasn't that hungry. I wolfed down the potatoes and chowed the roll down in record time, and sat contemplating the consequences of the rest of it.

Ranger flipped open his cell phone and punched a number. "Steph needs food," he said, and flipped it closed.

"What was that all about?" I demanded.

"I called Tank. You'll thank me, babe."

I was all too happy to push the tray away. "Twigs and bark?" I asked innocently.

The corners of his mouth tipped up. "Keep it up," he said, and sat on my bed. He flipped on a baseball game, and I was instantly absorbed. The bed was pretty skinny, so I sat against his chest, one leg on each side of my body. Ranger leaned back, and I went with him. His arm came around me and rested protectively on my belly. It made me realize how close I'd come to never getting the privelege of having children. I was successful at blinking the tears back this time.

Score one for the Unstoppable Stephanie.

I must have dozed off for a while, because when I opened my eyes the tv was off and the lights were out in the room. Ranger was still behind me, the arm firmly in place. It was full dark outside now. The hospital was quiet. I couldn't help thinking that if I'd woken up alone in my apartment now, with everything black and quiet, I might have had a panic attack. But here, with Ranger's smell and warmth surrounding me, I felt safe. Maybe it wouldn't last beyond tonight, but it was all I needed for now.

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