In response to a review, I never said you flamed me! I said a review. Uh it means Skoodge and Zim. Yes there actually is at least one Dib and Gaz fic. It was a step brother/step sister bull shit. Totally icky. And don't worry…the harassment will be returned to its rightful place. I've been thinking and you stick with what works. The first chapter, I noticed really distracted the readers well don't worry there wont be any chapters THAT gross again. Now on to the gayness!

Skoodge/ Zim romance…

Shutter

Skoodge screeched in horror as his ship plummeted through the atmosphere. He knew this would hurt really, really bad! It was quite sad, Skoodge's story. He was sent to Blorch home of the slaughtering rat people and half expected to be killed. He managed to survive that and conquer the planet before any other invader destroyed theirs, but when he proudly told the tallest and was to receive an award…poor Skoodge was launched out of a canon at the planet he had worked so hard to destroy. Some how he had made it through that and returned to Irk. The Tallest immediately sent him to Hobo 13 where, yet again his demise was expected. And despite being crushed by a drill sergeant's ass he came back to Irk for more punishment.

With a final attempt to rid themselves of the short Invader, Skoodge Tallest Red (the smart one, TALLEST RED RULES, literally he rules a multitude of planets.) said, "Eh… Zim isn't progressing as he should. You're to assist him in his mission."

"But I thought that was just a big joke to get rid of him…" Skoodge had replied.

"Yes well…get going Invader Skoodge and good luck to you!"

Red has said hastily pushing Skoodge into a Voot Runner. That had been six months ago and it hadn't been a good ship that Red had pushed him into. Skoodge had been grateful to see the planet but now, what with its gravitational pull, was finding it less appealing. He screamed even louder as he watched the metal strip off the sides and ever-growing flames rising from his engines, "AAAIIE!" he screamed strapping himself in. More or less fifteen feet above the ground he stopped screaming closed his eyes, clenched his teeth, and braced himself for the impact.

The impact forced Skoodge from his seat when his slipped out of the seldom used, not that reliable, seat belt. His face smacked the partially broken glass window. He groaned and crawled out of the wreckage through the broken door.

"Must…find…Zim." He muttered and passed out on the grass and burst in to flames, "AIIIEEE!"

Dib tapped his pen on the edge of his notebook. There was one line written on it, Zim is still being evil... despite the fact that he hasn't left all day. EVIL! Then there was a doodle of Zim lying on the ground with Xs for eyes as a Dib-esk character stood over him grinning.

Dib sighed heavily two days and no activity. The large headed paranormal investigator stood up stretching his sore limbs. He began to crawl out of the bush when his ankle became twisted in a low branch. His jaw hit the dirt, his teeth snapped together, hard. Dib just couldn't seem to get a break, physical injury, psychological injury, and physical injury again. Slowly Dib opened his eyes. Through the leaves he could see a short squat child walking up Zim's walkway. Dib shook his head a little as he slowly got off the ground. The fat little boy knocked on the door. It swung open and Zim poked his head outside. At first his expression was angry then surprised then sullen as he let the boy in. Dib's hands slipped out from underneath him, causing him to fell back down.

"What the hell?" (A/N: I know. They don't cuss but I thought it was valid.)

The hell that Dib was questioning could be answered simply if he could hear the dialogue between the two. Since he cannot, he will be left in confusion, but sine I am a merciful author I will clue you in!

A few seconds earlier…

A fat squat little boy straightened his shirt staring in to piece of shinny metal. His disguise as a human looked perfect, really. His skin was a peachy white color behind a pair of glasses he had dark green eyes. He wore a Mudvyane tee shirt and blue jeans with converses. He was so normal looking it was boring to describe him! Skoodge would never stand out in a crowd, not in a hundred years! He raised his peach hand and knocked on Zim's front door. Some where in the bowls of the house loud alarms sounded. Skoodge covered his fake ears to shield them from the sound. He glanced around; surely it wasn't normal on this planet to assault the ears of a visitor.

Seconds later the door swung and an annoyed Zim glared at him, "What do you want human?" Zim spat angrily. Skoodge stared at the other Irken definitely Zim, he looked exactly the same…green skin, that agitated look….that dreamy posture…Skoodge shook his head. He'd have to put his old crush behind him, "Hiya Zim! Its me Skoodge!" Zim's invisible eyebrow raised, "Skoodge." He repeated. There was pause where he seemed to be thinking, his expression drifted to a dreamy look…Skoodge his long lost love. No! Not now, he commanded himself.

"Eh, um hurry before any humans see you. Your disguise is disgusting!" he said as he ushered the other Irken into his domain. It was a repulsive human costume it made Skoodge look so much like them that it left Zim feeling sullen and annoyed.

Skoodge settled on Zim's couch and turned the dial on his old fashion watch, there was a small flash as he fazed back to cute little Irken Skoodge. Zim pulled out his contacts and tossed aside his wig. the two stared at each other in comfortable silence for a long time before Zim spoke.

"It's been a long time Skoodge." His mind returned to the days of them training together on an Irken military planet whose name I am blanking on. He remembered walking past Skoodge in the hall and blushing a deeper shade of green. He would always scurry away because as we all know, Irkens fear commitment.

"Uh…" Skoodge finally said, his face that same blushed green as Zim's was in that creepy flashback, "The tallest have sent me to assist you in your conquest of this unworthy dirt ball." Zim's eyes narrowed. He opened his mouth to say something about needing no one when he tripped and fell on to the couch beside Skoodge. (A/N: Aw man….too grossed out to continue! And yet I do any way.)

They gazed into each other's red eyes. Slowly their faces inched closer as suddenly they heard some one shout, "FUCK! Oh, fuck!" the front door swung opened. There stood a twenty something year old girl with paper white skin and purple pigtails. She was wearing a light purple jacket over a black half tee with a silver square in the center of the chest and red pants that lead in to a pair of knee high boots. She was panting as though she had run the whole way there (well she had but still). She leaned on the doorway catching her breath, "Sorry…I'm…late." She took a few deep breaths, "I was working on this new piece and…anyway that doesn't matter. The author sent me."

"Why?" demanded an enraged Zim, "This is extremely in character behavior, right Skoodge!"

"Right!" chirped the short, ugly invader. Devi shook her head, "Uh fuck no, it is not. You don't hate Skoodge necessarily," the two exchanged a vindicated look before she continued, "But" she said stressing the word, "You think you're way better than him." The purple haired girl said to the thinner of the two invaders, "You think he's a pathetic loser!"

Skoodge looked hurt. Tears appeared at the corners of his eyes. Devi turned her attention on him. She sighed heavily hating being out of the house and not working and having to stop two midget aliens from making the populous puke, "Don't think your so innocent. If you had this gay crush on Zim as some people imply you do then why wouldn't you have called him and said something about the banishing? Do ya get it?" she anxiously shifted her weight from foot to foot. She really just wanted to go home, the canvas needed to be tended to needed to be finished, what if some one only half created a baby. Then you'd have half a baby and what good is a half a baby to anyone?

"I get it. I get it alright!" Skoodge shuttered, "Ew…" he hit his watch, which made him look like a boring little earth kid. He rushed out of the house sickened to go vomit until his squiggly spooch bled. Zim glanced around a little then finally asked, "Erm…how did you get in without setting off my security?"

"Author turned it off."

"How the hell did she do that?" he asked cocking his head to the side, horrified by the powers the author held over his security. If she wanted she could have him exposed (yes I could. Cool power trip!).

"She wrote it off. Now I got to get meself home before Tenna notices that I left. If she finds out she'll drag me to that cool new noodle house." With that she raced out, with surprising speed considering how tall her boots are. Zim looked around awkwardly and went down to his lab to destroy one of the laser weasels that might make him feel better.

THE END OF ANOTHER DISTURBING CHAPTER….

Hey I've noticed your reviews have been consumed by being distracted by the first chapter well don't worry no more incest! I promise on your soul that there will be no more. (hey I'm not gonna swear on my soul, I'm Catholic!) Thanks for all the story ideas I'm sooo gonna use them. Thanks again. Invading Angel 0:-) -that's an angel!