Hazard 13: Yo people. What's goin down?
Night Joe: Nobody cares.
Death: "going down"?
Hoboslayer: never mind.
Death: too bad you are not a god, such as I. Then you might not be as stupid as you are.
Hazard 13:Oh, yeah, I'm adding a muse.
Eliwood: Hello everyone!
Death: Be silent, before I rend you into pieces and swallow your soul.
Hoboslayer: Shut up bitch.
Night Joe: I am going to kill your ass if you don't shut up with your happy talk.
Hazard 13: I was kidding. (Takes Eliwood and flings him into the sun).
Hoboslayer: WTF? You just chucked him into the sun.
Death: I wanted to eat his soul!
Hazard 13: Whatever. Anyway, I don't actually own Fire Emblem or the Pacific Ocean…yeah…and it's really annoying when people decide that they will add the characters of Fire Emblem to their muse section of Fire Emblem stories. Know what I mean? …yeah…
Song: My little box, by Gabriel Mann
Disclaimer: Obviously I don't own FE, cuz then I wouldn't be writing Fanfiction.
Chapter 2: The Gate of Souls -Unknown Land
As soon as we stepped into the red pentagram, I realized that the gray land we had been on was gone. As everyone else boarded, everything shimmered and faded, leaving blackness.
-Dread Isle
"Come!" Yelled the enemy leader, Uhai, from on top of his horse.
" Don't you worry. You'll pay for Leila's death!" yelled back Matthew, running towards him. As the angry thief started towards the nomadic trooper, he readied his bow, and shot his arrow. The arrow sped towards the thief, and as it reached its target, it was not noticed, even as it buried itself in his neck. Matthew somehow had the will to walk, and as he reached Uhai, he slashed with his knife, and cut a gaping hole in the horseman's chest, and they both fell to the ground, with bleeding wounds.
"No!" yelled Serra's voice, as she came towards the fallen warrior. Unfortunately for her though, as she reached him, she found him to not be breathing, and he had no pulse. Her cure staff would not work, unless he was still alive. However, he had not been the only one to die. In his last charge, he had mortally wounded Uhai, who had fallen to the ground, dead.
-Dragon's gate
As our bubble reached another gray dot, everyone was shoved through a large opening, one that seemed able to fit even a small building. As we poured out from this ornate gateway, I looked around, and I saw everyone else getting up.
"This is the Gateway of Souls." came Death's voice. " I use this to store some of my excess souls, for storage, before I have them go down to hell."
"Dude, like…this looks like that weird game…" Hoboslayer said.
"Hey, this is Fire something". Said Night Joe
"Fire Emblem." I said, having played lots of strategy games for the Game boy advance.
"Intruders! What are you doing in my master's home?" yelled a strange voice. I turned and saw it was a weird guy in a robe. He looked like a monk from a monastery..
"Dude. You're Ephidel." I said.
"Have my souls…manifested?" came the voice of Death. "You are not a sage, as you are dressed as. You have the combined magical abilities of the dead souls you are made of."
"Intruder! You shall be the first to fall." The morph said, stepping closer to Death. Immediately, Night Joe, Ezel (who had no clue what was going on), Hoboslayer, and I moved to the eastern wall.
"Excalibur!" As the morph, putting his hand out towards Death.
"If you wish to battle me, you may as well jump off a cliff, soul". As the magic blasthit Death, it simply bounced off of him, doing absolutely no damage at all. The morph looked astonished.
"That is incredibly powerful anima magic. How can it just bounce off?"
"No magic can truly harm me."
Death raised his hands, and brought them down to the ground with the force of a sledgehammer. The ground fractured beneath them. He muttered an incantation, and the whole cavern shook violently, and a black fog rose from the ground.
"How is this possible?" the morph asked.
"I am a god." Answered Death, his eyes showing red from beneath his hood. The fog started to show around Death's body, and he lifted up his left hand, and pointed it towards Ephidel. A lance of dark energy flashed out, impaling the morph in the chest, just as another five did the same to his head and limbs. Ephidel started shaking, and he fell to the ground, and fell into dust.
"Someone has contaminated my stored souls. This is not good. I must destroy this thief, before all my souls have been used." Death said.
"You actually are Death?" asked Ezel. "I thought it to be a nickname."
"Dude, he is Death." Said Night Joe. "He comes out of my closet all the time. And Hazard's shower."
"I see. But why a closet, and what's a shower?"
"Do you know what a bath is?" asked Night Joe.
"Yes, of course." He replied.
"Imagine someone dumping buckets of water on you to get you washed."
"Alright."
"Dude." I said. "I had no idea he could do that."
"Yeah, seriously. That was so cool." Responded Hoboslayer.
Death started walking towards the stairs. We edged along, following him.
-Dragon's gate
"My liege…s, there appears to be many more Laus troops inside the ruins. Shall we engage?" Asked Mark, who was the tactician of the three lords.
"Yes. My father is in there, and by Elimine, I shall save him!" yelled the redheaded lord.
The lord started to run straight towards the gate, only to be stopped by Lord Hector.
"Idiot."
"I must save my father!" yelled Eliwood, as his friend lifted him up into the air.
"If I may, I would just like to say that there are scores of enemy troops in front of us. We must take care of them and the enemy leader before anything is to be done." Said the tactician.
"Alright, but remember that every second wasted is another second that my father might die." He said.
-Back inside the Gate
"Dude, like that Nergal guy is in here somewhere." Said Night Joe.
"What's a Nergal?" asked Ezel.
"Never mind."
"Well, I'm ready for him." Said Hoboslayer, cocking his pump shotgun with a faint "cha-chunk" noise. A shell came out.
"You idiot." I said, knowing more about guns than the whole group. "You push the slide forward when you want it ready to discharge. Then you pull it back and push it forward once it's been used."
"But in the movies, they always do that."
"Well, the movies do that for effect, ya know?" interjected Night Joe, from the left of me.
We were all talking as we walked down a large, large, large set of stairs. I looked on either side, and found that the stairs just melted into darkness. I followed Death, as he kept on walking.
"Dude, this is so cool, how we keep popping up in these games, huh?" I asked Night Joe and Hoboslayer. They both nodded in the affirmative.
"Yeah seriously" said Night Joe. "Our lives kinda sucked. Except for Xbox live and World of Warcraft."
"Now this is what I call fun." Said Hoboslayer.
"Well, antilaws had almost been legalized, so it just didn't feel like there was anymore fun back in my world." Ezel said, as he took off his black hat. He took out three boxes that were, obviously, very small.
"Umm…did you keep those in your HAT?" I asked, inquisitive of what the hell he was doing. Not everyone could actually keep boxes in their hats.
"They're a new set of antilaws; I call them blank cards. I sold a few to some corrupt judges so that they could annoy everyone. I felt it was rather fun." Replied Ezel, putting two of the antilaws back in his hat and putting it back on.
He opened up the small box, and held up the card. It was a shiny blank card, about four or five times larger than a playing card. They were very thin, and were encased in glass.
"These, however, allow you to change the laws to whatever you wish. I never got to try them, so naturally, I kept them with me." He was very happy about it.
"There aren't laws here." I said.
" Oh, well, they may come in handy eventually."
We heard a yell. "FATHER! WHERE ARE YOU?"
"Oh, shit."
Hazard 13: that took about a year…cuz school started… RR people.