A/N: Sooooooooooo sorry for the delay! I had to give a 30 minute presentation on the first French fascist party in the 1920s (much-o boring-o) yesterday so was unable to really work on this fic! I was going to work on it last night but was really tired, and then Aussie TV finally showed the episode "Prometheus Unbound" on TV (they' d delayed it because Atlantis hadn't begun airing yet) so I had to watch that! Strange character, that Vala... kind of like that Bond villain "Onatopp" from Goldeneye...

Enough excuses… I hope I've made up for it with essentially a double chapter and even a little reward for you near the end!

Thanks for the reviews as always!
Bookworm, I don't think I can stop second guessing myself but I'll shut up about my concerns (for the moment). You were right though – thanks for the input!
Texaslazyace, thanks for reviewing! It's much appreciated! I hope you keep reading even if you revert to your 'lurking' ways!

Here 'tis…

Chapter IV – Fit for duty

For the second time in the space of a few hours, General Hammond and the rest of SG1 were left staring at an open doorway that Jack had just raced through in a fit of anguished rage. The phone on the desk rang abruptly and General Hammond shot his arm out to answer it.

"I understand. Yes. Thankyou airman." Putting the receiver back in its place, he stated simply: "Colonel O'Neill has left the base."

Teal'c had remained stoic throughout the exchange, but now chose to speak his mind. "General Hammond, I do not believe O'Neill to be unfit for duty." His voice diffused a sense of renewed calm on the room that had so recently been supercharged with emotion. "He in no way endangered this planet with his actions, and would not do so in the future."

Sam remained conspicuously quiet, contemplating the chair in front of her where Jack had been sitting. She couldn't deny that he was uncharacteristically rattled… but then what could they have expected? To be faced with the person who had tortured and killed you repeatedly – no matter how much time you'd had to deal with it – was never going to be easy. The question remained: was he up for a mission to Australia? What if Baal did appear?

Above all these practical concerns, she felt an unquantifiable empathy for the man she had grown not only to like, but to admire above all others over the years. The man she held so dear to her heart she couldn't contemplate living her life without him as part of it. She'd tried so hard to get him back from Baal's clutches. She hadn't been able to do it quickly enough. She felt the annoying prickling sensation of tears forming in her eyes and took a quick intake of breath in an effort to stave them off, to remain strong where even the strongest person she knew couldn't.

As these thoughts flew through her mind, she became aware that there had been no movement in the room since Teal'c's last words. Looking up slowly, she realised that all eyes were on her.

"Major?" General Hammond had waited patiently for Sam's attention. He needed to know what exactly had happened on that planet.

"Sir," Sam again found herself looking at the walls around her for inspiration. "When Baal came through the gate, Colonel O'Neill was shocked and, well… froze… for a short time…" she looked to Teal'c, who remained as impossible to read as ever. "But that didn't last long." She added emphatically.

"Yeah," Jonas contributed for the first time to the discussion. "He didn't seem to be out of it to me… just more on edge than normal… but he listened to us when pressed the importance of looking at the cave wall again before leaving." Jonas was relieved to see that Sam seemed to agree with his reading of the situation. "I mean, if he was really irrational he wouldn't have let us do that."

"Indeed, it is O'Neill's own sense of doubt that fuels his current reaction, General." Teal'c completed what the other two members of SG1 were thinking.

General Hammond looked at the people seated in front of him, before glancing at the doorway Jack had disappeared into. He knew Jack. He knew what the career officer was capable of; he knew how many demons the man had already had to face throughout his life. He knew, above all, however, that if Colonel O'Neill spiralled into despair then he could not be allowed to depart on the mission.

His thoughts brought back to the mission at hand, he turned to Jonas quickly. "How much do we know of this 'Turramulli' and Uluru?"

Jonas looked a bit surprised at the change of subject but answered promptly. "Not a lot, General. Sam had already figured it was in Australia, so before this meeting I quickly looked up the references and apparently there is an indigenous Australian legend about a kind of monster called Turramulli, but I haven't had a chance to go far beyond that. Besides," he added, "there aren't that many experts on Aboriginal Dreamtime stories this side of the Pacific Ocean… we'll have to talk to an Australian expert."

Hammond nodded thoughtfully. Jonas' words confirmed what he had thought. He had a lot of phone calls to make.

"I'll alert the President of the situation." He stood up from his chair, but was still resting his palms on the table. "We'll need to involve the Australian government in this – hopefully we'll be able to keep it within the military. We already have training agreements with their armed forces. Jonas," he continued, directing his attention more specifically on SG1's newest member, "I want to you determine whoever it is you need to help with this. I'll arrange for their clearance and then an aeroplane for you all tomorrow morning."

"What of O'Neill, General Hammond?" Teal'c voiced the concern they all shared.

"That's up to him, Teal'c. I'll try to get in touch with him now, but ultimately he has to decide whether he's fit for duty or not."

"But sir-" Sam felt helpless.

"I know Major," General Hammond held a hand up to stop her mid-sentence. "But unless he pulls himself together, then he's right. He could be a liability." Looking around the room at the apprehensive faces looking at him, he gathered the papers in front of him before moving towards the door. "If he's not ready by 0900 tomorrow, I'll have to assign someone else to lead SG1. Dismissed."

Sam slumped back into the chair and looked dejectedly towards Teal'c. Neither of them spoke as Jonas got up from his seat and headed towards Daniel's old lab, where he did most of his work. Instead they both sat, silently, contemplating the adverse turn of events that had befallen them on that planet.

Sam went over Jack's reactions again and again in her mind. The sheer distress that had been so obvious in his gaze when they were hiding in that cave haunted her. If nothing else, he was obviously harbouring a much heavier burden than he had let on. Of course they'd known basically that he'd been tortured, but he'd never really spoken of it – not that Sam expected he would.

"Should one of us go over there?" she asked Teal'c tentatively. "I mean, would he even let us in the door?"

Teal'c seemed prepared for this question, as he answered without thinking. "Indeed I believe you should try to converse with O'Neill."

"But maybe you-"

"You witnessed his true reaction to Baal's arrival, Major Carter," Teal'c said gravely, having evidently contemplated the possible courses of action. "I believe you are best suited for this particular task."

"But-"

"I will attempt to talk to O'Neill should you fail." Teal'c added evenly, before rising effortlessly out of his chair. "But I do not believe that scenario will occur."

Sam was left sitting alone in the debriefing room, apprehensive of what she was about to do. She wanted nothing more than to comfort Jack, to let him know how much she was sorry, how much she respected and believed in him. But… she knew how difficult he could be. Only a couple of months ago when Daniel ascended he had been so callous, so cold; how on Earth was she going to get through to him? How could she talk to him? Besides that, for years now she had been avoiding any situation where they would be too close. She knew her feelings for him were dangerously close to breaching the acceptable relationship allowed between her and her commanding officer… Seeing his distress in the cave had made her want to hug him, kiss him softly and tell him everything was going to be okay. She still wanted to do just that, but knew she couldn't.

Sighing in resignation she realised that in these concerns she was essentially missing the forest for the trees. She forced herself to concentrate on one thing, and one thing only: the Colonel needed help, whether he'd admit it or not. Re-energised with that simple realisation, she stood abruptly and purposefully moved out of the now-empty briefing room.

Jack roared down the road and turned abruptly into his driveway. He was going so fast the brakes on his truck only just managed to stop him from careering through his porch and into the front door of his house. He turned off the engine and sat in the dark; the world around him suddenly silent. The abrupt evaporation of sound around him left Jack alone with his thoughts, and he brusquely remembered why he had left the base so quickly. He angrily punched the steering wheel in front of him, causing the horn to sound.

"It's not the car's fault, Jack." With a start Jack realised that he was no longer alone in the cabin of the truck.

"Daniel!" he hissed, embarrassed at being discovered in such a state. "What are you, spying on me!" His eyes portrayed the sense of hurt and betrayal he felt towards his friend. "What the hell are you doing here, anyway? The ascended life too boring for you?" Having recovered from the shock of discovering Daniel sitting next to him, the familiar hint of contemptuous sarcasm had returned to his voice.

"Jack," Daniel began patiently, "You need to calm down. There is nothing wrong with you. I said you would be alright and I stand by that."

"The HELL there isn't!" Jack shouted at the man sitting only inches to his right. "Baal's probably on his way to Earth and it's all MY fault! I didn't trust my own judgement!"

"Jack you don't know that." Daniel seemed unaffected by Jack's rage. "Baal probably would have found the reference to Earth given time… you don't even know if he has now." Jack was about to launch into another angry tirade when Daniel cut him off. "Don't you get it Jack? If Baal hadn't come through the gate, if Jonas hadn't checked the wall for references, you wouldn't even know there was a danger!" Leaning in so that Jack couldn't avoid his gaze, Daniel emphasised his point: "You ultimately made the right choice in a bad situation; and thanks to that, you now know exactly what you're up against!"

"Hmph," Jack seemed to take this fact in briefly, before yet again finding a bone of contention. "But I still fucked up…" his voice wasnearly desperate now, "I was almost catatonic! If Carter hadn't've been there…" He let his voice trail away, remembering the soft, reassuring, feel of her hand on the back of his neck; the welcome warmth of her skin against his… bringing him back to reality, supporting him when he could no longer support himself.

"But she was there." Daniel stated simply. He briefly closed his eyes in concentration before turning to Jack once more. "In fact," he motioned behind him, "She's here now." With those words, he disappeared, leaving Jack speechless and alone in his truck.

As Jack watched Sam's car stop beside his, he heard Daniel's voice once more: "Listen to her Jack. They all need you back at the SGC."

Sam brought her car to a stop and turned the engine off. She sat looking at Jack's house with a certain sense of trepidation. She didn't know how he was going to react to her being there – he probably wouldn't welcome her presence, and it's not like she knew what she was going to say anyway. She had just garnered the courage to open the door and get out of the car when someone on the outside did it for her, letting the cool evening air wash over her.

"Sir?" She blinked up at an apparently annoyed Jack, who was looking at her accusingly.

A/N: how was that alliteration? grin

"You gonna get out of the car Carter?" he seemed more resigned and impatient than angry at her appearance at his house. "Or would you like to talk here in my driveway?"

"Oh, umm… right." Sam cautiously undid her seatbelt and slid out of the car, confused at Jack's composed figure as he chivalrously closed the door behind her and strode off towards the front door.

"Right." She whispered to herself, following his receding figure towards the house. This reaction was not one she had envisaged. She'd been ready for a fight; ready to argue with him at the front door about letting her in. Instead, he'd come to get her. Incidentally, she wondered where he'd been. Apparently his front door was locked so he hadn't been inside yet.

Jack fought his recurring battle with the difficult lock before finally succeeding in opening his front door. Throwing it against the wall in a mix of frustration and resignation, he flicked on the light switch and headed straight for the kitchen.

"Wanna beer?" he threw over his shoulder at Sam, who was hesitating at the front door, looking around.

"Huh?" Sam only half heard him. Jack's house looked like squatters had been living in it. There were empty beer bottles and cans littering almost every surface of the house, barring a couple of "paths" left clear on the floor. Sam noted that these predominantly led from the kitchen to the living room and to the bathroom. She snapped out of her shock to look at Jack, who was waving a couple of beer bottles in the air, his eyebrows raised questioningly.

"Oh, right. Yeah, sure." She managed to get out, moving awkwardly into the house and closing the front door behind her. There was a hole in the wall where the doorknob had smashed against it. She noted that it appeared to be well-worn; apparently Jack often took out his anger on the front door.

"Ok. Two beers." Jack flipped the lids of the bottles with his thumb and handed one to her before moving towards the living room and sitting on the couch. He called over his shoulder to her as he moved down the hall. "You coming? Sorry about the mess… my cleaning lady went on strike."

Sam moved slowly down the hall and perched on the edge of the couch in the living room. "Sir, you don't have a cleaning lady." She said quietly.

Jack feigned surprise. "Huh? Well maybe I should get one." He sat back on the couch and took a large gulp of his beer. His eyes were directed straight ahead at the silent TV. He was waiting for her to speak.

Sam shook her head slightly trying to brush of the strangeness of the situation. She brought her mind back to the task at hand and cleared her throat so that Jack was looking at her.

"Um, sir…" she never thought she'd feel so unsure of herself talking to him like this. She desperately wanted to reassure him, to tell him everything was ok. But if she did that, would he just come back with one of his evasive sarcastic comments?

"Out with it Carter, we both know why you're here." Jack's voice didn't sound annoyed, and his expression was calm, but Sam felt there was a certain edge; a challenge in his tone.

"Well, sir, I just…" she faltered again, before taking the bull by the horns, speaking in a tumbling rant. "Sir, no one thinks for a minute that you're not fit for duty. In fact, no one thinks for a minute that we can defend this planet against Baal without you." She saw Jack cringe at the mention of the Goa'uld but ignored it, speaking quickly now so as to avoid any interruption. "You were perfectly justified in wanting to leave that planet as soon as possible, and it's a credit to your leadership that you listened to my feelings on the matter." She saw Jack wasn't even trying to contradict her but, rather than taking this as a good sign, it made Sam slightly concerned. She continued nonetheless, essentially reciting the speech she had been formulating on the drive over. "There are absolutely no doubts about your competency – and General Hammond agrees. The fact that you were willing to discuss our course of action and go against your instincts is a testament to that." She slid down onto the couch proper, sitting next to him. She rested her elbows on her knees and let her hand holding the bottle of beer hover in front of her. Looking at him sideways, she made her final point. "We need you sir." Quietly, she added: "I don't want to do this without you."

Jack had been sitting patiently on the couch listening to Sam's rant. He had known what she was going to say. As predicted, it complimented Daniel's argument. Still, her reference to their 'discussion' on the planet brought the seriousness of his conduct to his attention. Resisting the urge to tell Sam where to go, he remembered Daniel's words and breathed in deeply.

"Carter-" Jack didn't know where to start. He realised now that Baal's discovery of Uluru's true location was inevitable, but that didn't mean he was fit for duty. "Carter," he began again, "The fact that I listened to you in that stupid cave… that's not the point." He glanced at her briefly before returning his gaze to the blank screen on the other side of the room. Taking another great swig of his beer, he forced himself to continue talking. "There shouldn't have to be any discussion. The military was designed for orders to be issued and promptly followed – not discussed. I have to make those orders, and you should feel able to follow them; trusting my judgement even if you don't agree with me." He turned his head slightly to look at her. "If there's any ambiguity then (a) I'm not fit for duty, and (b) I'd only end up getting you killed."

The frankness of his words alarmed Sam. Setting her beer down on the table in front of them, she flattened her palms against her legs before bring her hands up to her head and rubbing her eyes in an attempt to think more clearly.

"Sir, I do trust your judgement." She sank back into the couch. "If you'd repeated your order to leave, I would have." She turned to look at him again. "I made the choice to 'discuss' our options."

Jack clicked his tongue in exasperation. She wasn't getting it. "But don't you see?" He appealed to her, the pitch of his voice getting higher with his desperation. "I was wrong. My judgement was off… you were right to question me. I can't risk that happening again – you're all better off without me."

"Oh for crying out loud," Sam breathed to herself, clenching her fists in frustration at his stubborn attitude. "Sir, you're only human. No one is a military machine…" she held up a hand to stop him from interceding. "It's not like you've never been wrong before – and I can guarantee you, you'll be wrong again at some point in the future…" she hazarded a small smile at this point, hoping he would bite at her teasing jibe. Instead, he seemed to be in deep thought, the uncertainty painted clearly on his face.

Jack was pondering his own weaknesses. Of course he knew it was impractical to believe that he'd always make the right call. The problem was, up until now he'd always more or less trusted his own judgement. He knew the seed of doubt could be their undoing. Besides, he'd be even less use to them if he was going to freeze every time Baal came near him.

"I still can't trust myself not to freeze like I did earlier." He said the words so quietly he wasn't sure if it had been out loud or not. Realising the admission he'd just made, he silently prayed for the latter.

Sam, however, had definitely heard his words. She was amazed he was being so open with her. Reaching over to him and taking his now empty beer out of his hands, she put it on the table next to hers before turning back to look him straight in the eye. She edged closer so that there was no longer a gaping space between them on the couch.

"Sir… Jack…" she registered a small flutter in her stomach at using his first name. Her voice was becoming throaty with empathy for what he must have gone through to have that reaction upon hearing Baal's voice. "No one blames you for that. After what he did to you, it's perfectly understandable…"

"Carter I know that," Jack growled at her, losing patience with the position he found himself in. "But don't you see? I'll be no use to anyone if I'm freakin' catatonic!"

"You won't be." Sam stated simply.

"Huh?" Jack was confused, was she agreeing with him? This didn't make sense. "I won't be any use! Then why are you-"

"I didn't mean that, sir," Sam rectified quickly. "I meant you won't be catatonic."

"How do you know!" Jack's voice squealed at her as he remembered his complete loss of control.

"Sir, there's no way you'd freeze like that if we were in an active situation…" Sam began, still looking him straight in the eye, willing him to believe in her trust in him. "Before, we were hiding in an alcove – it's completely different."

"I repeat: how do you know!" Jack enunciated the word in an exaggerated manner, opening his mouth wide as he said it.

"Because I have faith in you." Sam said quietly, averting her eyes from his quickly to hide her feelings from him.

"Well you're the only one in this room that does." Jack let his head fall into his hands, which were being propped up by his elbows digging uncomfortably into his thighs. "You don't know what it was like…" He said quietly, not even really talking to Sam, but to the room in general.

"I know that." Sam said quietly, waiting for him to take the initiative and speak again.

"This isn't some selfish, 'I want to wallow in my sorrows' thing," he twisted his head to take a peak at her. "I don't want to get anyone else hurt." He paused briefly, "Just me, I can live with. But if anything happened to you guys…"

Sam put her hand gently on his arm and let it slide down over the coarse skin to grasp his hand. Jack allowed her to do this and lifted his head to look at her. He saw the concern in her eyes; he saw how much she wanted to make it all better. He felt her warm skin touching against his and wished for the thousandth time that they could just forget about everything they'd been through and live their lives without having to worry about yet another damned system lord.

"Do you honestly believe you could just sit back while we tried our best to defeat Baal without you?" Sam spoke softly, but there was nothing hesitant about her voice. She'd found a way to convince him – his Achilles heel – and she knew it. "SG1 is more than a unit, sir – we're a team… and we need our leader."

"But-"

"Don't interrupt!" Sam ordered softly, her hand still grasping his. "I can't even begin to imagine what he did to you," her expression darkened again, filling with empathy for him and transmitting the utmost sincerity into her words. "Whatever happens," her voice was faltering now, "We'll… I'll be there with you… this time we'll face him together and we'll get him." She tried to ignore a tear that had escaped from her eye and was tracing its way down her cheek. "I'm so sorry I wasn't able to get you out sooner last time… I'm so sorry I made you take that symbiote… I'm so sorry for what happened…"

Sam lost all her self-control and finally ceded to her desire to wrap her arms around him in a massive hug. The anguish of knowing he was trapped at Baal's hand but being unable to find a solution had torn her up inside and now she felt incredibly responsible for his state of mind.

"Hey, Carter?" Jack whispered, his arms loosely draped around her waist. Suddenly he felt mildly uncomfortable with their closeness, aware of how dangerous it could prove to be. "It's ok. Really. It's not your fault."

Sam pulled away from him slightly, sensing his discomfort with their close proximity. She wiped her eyes, trying to get rid of the slight stinging sensation from the tears mixing with what was left of her mascara. "I still wish it hadn't happened… I'm so sorry it did." Her eyes were red with sadness and for once both she and Jack just looked at each other, neither of them trying to alter their appearance or behaviour. They were simply themselves.

"I know Sam," Jack found himself in the strange position of now comforting the person who had wanted to comfort him. "But I don't need your pity, k? As you said, we'll fight him together."

"You think this is pity!" she didn't even register that fact that Jack had essentially agreed to come on the mission to Australia. "You don't have my pity… you have my support – always." Before she knew what she was doing, Sam closed the distance between them again, this time keeping her face level with his. She felt him take a sharp breath as she drew nearer, opening his mouth slightly in anticipation. Softly, she kissed him on the lips, telling him again that everything was going to be alright, that she was going to be there with him.

Abruptly Sam pulled away, her expression one of horror at what she had just done. "Oh God… I shouldn't have done that… I- I'm sorry." Before Jack could say or do anything – indeed, before he could even come to terms with the fact that her lips were no longer pleasantly locked with his – Sam was on her feet and almost running out of his house.

Finally coming to his senses, Jack shook himself out of his torpor and got to his feet, running after her. He got outside and onto the porch just as she was getting into her car.

"Sam! Wait!" She didn't stop, but instead slammed the door closed and hurriedly started the engine. "Dammit!" Jack shouted to the night as her tyres squealed as the car roared backwards down the driveway away from the house.

He stood, fixed on the spot, in the silent night, looking absently into the driveway as if his mind power alone would cause her car to return. Before he could even think about what had just happened in any rational manner, he heard a shrill ringing noise emanating from his car. Unable to ignore the ear-splitting ring-tone of his new phone, he angrily wrenched the passenger seat open and grabbed the phone to his ear.

"O'Neill!" he barked, warning whoever it was on the other end to tread careful.

"Colonel," General Hammond's concerned voice filtered into his ear. "I was getting concerned, I've been trying to call you for over almost an hour now."

Jack calmed down slightly but had found a new sense of purpose. He was retrieving his keys from where they were, still embedded in the front door, as he spoke to General Hammond. He strode purposefully back towards the car and hoisted himself into the driver's seat, turning on the ignition.

"Sorry General, I'd left my phone in the car." His voice was determined and precise, with no evidence of emotion. "I'm on my way back into the base." He stated matter-of-factly. "Permission to leave for Australia with the rest of my team in the morning?"

General Hammond didn't quite know what to think of Jack's reactions, but wasn't going to second guess his 2IC. Figuring he could ask questions when Jack got there, he merely indicated his approval and hung up.

Jack looked at his watch quickly as he reversed brazenly down his driveway. It was only 8pm, he doubted Carter would be going home in the state she was in – she'd prefer to distract herself with some piece of technology. Also, she'd never imagine he'd voluntarily go back to the base this late into the evening. In this case, she'd be wrong.

TBC

A/N: There you go! An extra long instalment to make up for my late posting! This was a struggle and a half to write how I wanted it, so I hope it came out ok…

I think we'll actually get to the mission in the next chapter – or at least we'll prepare for it. It's funny how I think I can get so much into a chapter and then before I know it I've only written half of what I meant to and it's already like 5 pages! That's why this chapter was so long – I didn't want to break it up at all so I just put it all in together!

PLEASE review! I'm dying to know what you all think of this…