Chapter XVIII
Éowyn and Krane were so happy enjoying each others' company, and I think, or at least, I hope that they enjoyed my presence as well. I did not say nearly as much as I usually do when I talk to either or both of them, but I think I contributed enough so that they would not become distrustful of my meeting with Marris. This time, when they asked me how the introduction went, I had a formulated response that had been going through my head. I had resolved, after being completely taken off my guard by Gríma's announcement, to never deny the inevitable and to prepare for it.
Krane was a little less impatient than Éowyn, so he was the first to ask. "Ardeas, I was wondering, out of curiousity, how did your introduction to Marris go?" Apparently, Éowyn had told him.
My reply came as easily as my tears had come when Marris slammed me against the wall, "Oh, I do not know if we will get along very well. There is no, or hardly any, common ground. He doesn't like reading of any sort, any form of astronomy, art, or music. His only loves are for weapons of all sizes and horseback riding." I tactfully decided not to mention his rumored love for women of all types.
"Ahh," Krane said smiling, "That is too bad. But I am afraid that you will find most men in Edoras a little less cultured than you might in Minas Tirith or Dol Amroth."
Éowyn laughed lightly at the trivialness of my statement. She knew as well as I that marriages should not be built on things about which a couple can speak together. But I would rather have her think me ignorant than to receive false sympathy if I told her that Marris was a conceited prick who made me feel ill and just recently caused me to vomit and cry in the hall. I believe the vomit is still there.
I smiled brightly, hoping that the subject would be dropped. I was in no mood for tearful confessionals now. I just wanted to be left alone, with no prying fingers trying to dig deeper into my world.
My attention turned to Éowyn, "Will he be seated beside me at dinner tonight?"
"I don't think so. I think everyone will be in their usual places. Uncle will probably announce the betrothal some time when everyone is still there, but dinner itself is mostly over."
I relaxed a little too visibly, and she gave me a curious look. I lied easily, "I really don't want to spend my entire dinner trying to find something that interests us both. I am at my wits end on it."
Éowyn grinned, understanding what I meant. I felt really awful lying to her. She was one of the three people I could sort of trust, and I hated lying to her, but I did not see any other options.
They talked for a few more minutes before Éowyn excused herself to change for dinner. It was then that Krane began the interrogation that I had not expected.
"Ardeas, what exactly don't you like about your almost fiancé?
Do you want a list?
"I think its mostly we have no common ground. Marriages are based on communication, and if we have nothing to talk about, it is not going to work so well," I lied as easily as I had to Éowyn. But this time, I felt ashamed to say that I felt no twinge of guilt.
He gave me a curious look. "Are you sure?"
This was going in a bad direction. I decided to change the subject.
"Of course. But Krane?"
"Yes?"
"Have you ever been married?"
His eyes darkened, "Almost. But don't change the subject. I am not finished." He gave me a queer look.
"Apologies."
"Do you want to marry him at all?"
I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. One false move and all my hopes of being unnoticed would be lost. "Not especially. He is handsome and gentlemanly but is not really the kind of man I want to marry."
"Why is that?"
"As I said before," I began, irritated and a little worried, "We have no common ground. He doesn't like history or languages or astronomy or anything in particular that I like. I don't care much for weapons or anything like such that he adores."
Krane raised an eyebrow. "Could you describe his relationship to weaponry?"
Danger zone. Red flags were waving around in my head. He was trying to test me. "Not very well. We've only spent part of the afternoon together and we hardly talked, or at least, hardly had a conversation." Inwardly, I congratulated myself over the save.
Krane steepled his hands and leaned back in the chair, nodding, slouching slightly with his legs stretched out before him. He had probably been the military at some point in time, perhaps at the same time as Marris, and of course, he lived in Meduseld, so it was obvious he knew Marris to the point where he could tell when I was lying about Marris. This was a very worrisome and uncomfortable situation.
"Is there any other reason why you might choose to decline a betrothal with this young man?"
"No."
There was a small pause and he looked at me curiously. Dammit, if Marris acted the same way with other women as he did with me, then Krane might know it. I had a fat feeling that if I told anyone, there would be hell to pay from Marris, something that I knew he was more than capable of doing.
"Are you positive that there is no other reason?"
"Yes," I said, and then with an air of indifference as I brushed imaginary dust off my clothes, "Now Krane, I must change my attire for dinner."
"That would be the first time you have since you have come to Meduseld."
"Krane, look at it this way. I find it very uncomfortable for you to interrogate myself in such a manner. Do you trust me or not when I say "The reason I am unhappy with my upcoming marriage to Marris is because we cannot communicate"?
"Not especially."
"Oh."
The conversation rather went dead from that point. There really is that much more to say about the situation except that I kept shifting in my chair frequently, as Krane looked like he was trying to read my mind with one of his stares.
---
If everyone of those stupid people took one more bite of their food and talked and laughed and half spit their food out one more time, I was going to poison every one of their drinks tomorrow at breakfast.
Each mouthful of my own food was a task to get down, and finally Théodred asked me if I thought it tasted bad. Of course, it was probably the most wonderful food I had tasted. Théoden, for the celebration, had ordered that dinner be suckling pigs with apples and grapes from Gondor, the traditional whole wheat bread served with the best butter ever churned, roast pheasant served with succulent quail eggs, trout from the Snowbourn, and even some of the best wines and meads were brought out for consumption. And to top it off, there were raspberry tarts, cakes dripping in peach, pear, and apple glaze, a magnificent bottle of port reserved for the upper table, and to top it off, a rare treat of oranges, hollowed out and filled with a creamy, orange-flavored, ice cold almost beverage like dessert that must have taken a good bit of skill to make so quickly so that it did not melt before it reached the table.
I should have enjoyed the feast. I probably would never have one like it again for a very long time, but I couldn't. It wasn't the spectacle of the serving girls bringing out magnificent trays of some exotic foods that I had never even dreamed of existing, and it wasn't even the rude, unrestrained courtiers who seemed to have forgotten manners and scrambled to get whatever they could. It wasn't even the dratted fat old woman, some aging duchess or what-have-you down the table who took over half of all the quail eggs for herself and still gorged on everything else.
It might have been Gríma who kept touching my thigh and I couldn't tell him to stop and that he was making me sick. If I had screamed, I doubt many would have noticed, having imbibed too much of a rich intoxicating cordial or feeling so completely bloated that they didn't give a damn about anything except lying down for a few hours. I would have crawled into Éomer's lap to get away from Wormy, but that would have resulted in heaven knows what. I just wish Wormy would get his dratted hand off my leg and leave me alone. He had already ruined my life damned well with having me tie the knot with some person who probably would beat me or worse.
The announcement of my engagement came and went without much ado, I was pleased to note. Théoden shouldn't have given a perfectly glorious feast if he wanted people to pay attention. The quail egg woman took one egg and stuck it on her tongue and chewed with her mouth open. Marris looked up at me from his part of the table with a look that scared the shit out of me. I pretended to be thoroughly engrossed in my orange.
Éomer gave me a nudge. I was supposed to say something back to Théoden.
"Pardon me, Father, I did not hear what you said."
He smiled fatherly and murmured something about being in love.
"I asked you, how did your meeting with your fiancé go? Do you like him?" He smiled hopefully at me.
Oh dear.
"He was very different from anyone I have known. I have not met one like him."
So I didn't completely lie, but what was I going to say? 'He hurt me and made me vomit and I hate his guts'? Marris would probably kill me, Gríma would behead my corpse, and Théoden would cry his eyes out because I was not safely accounted for when he finally died.
I desperately wanted to shove Wormy's face into the pig he was eating. If I could have done that without serious repercussions, I certainly would have. Then maybe I wouuld run away to some distant village and pretend that the King had not adopted me and that I was not engaged against my will, and maybe I would live forever and ever, completely happy and without some disturbed husband sleeping beside me at night with me wondering if this night with him would be my last before he finally beat me into a pulp.
Oh yes, Father, I liked my fiancé very much.
Author's Note: I think I liked the last chapter a little better than this one. But what can I say? School is coming closer and closer and I don't want to start term quite yet. I've just gotten used to not waking up and being dragged to school at some God-forsaken hour in the morning, and I don't want to start again. Sorry about the updates, but even though I wrote the chapters, I never got around to posting them. Apologies. And another thing, I'm just going to stop giving dates when I expect to finish the story. I have been writing considerably more than I usually do over the summer, but it isn't enough. Uninfinity will probably not be released until, if I'm lucky, Christmas time, which sounds awful to say, but that's probably how it will end out. Thanks to everyone for all the support, praise, constructional criticism and everything, and I hope you enjoyed this chapter. May I also recommend my fictionpress account, where I now have three vignettes that are running low on reviews :). And as always, please review anything of mine.