Author's Note: Hello my lovely readers. Hopefully I haven't lost anyone since the last update and everyone has stuck with me. I know it's been several months but I'm in my Junior year of high school and had lots of tests going on at the same time. Now I'm almost done and updates will be quicker. Thank you all for sticking with me! Enjoy!
Chapter 29: Almost Summer
Hermione woke and a look at the nearest clock told her it was a little after six in the morning. Hermione decided to stand up and go have a look at Ginny to see if she was all right. She slowly pushed herself out of bed and made her way around the corner to where Ginny's bed was. Ginny lay curled in a ball with a hand over her face, her eyes tightly shut. Finally, she looked up.
"Oh, Gin, are you all right?" Ginny moaned.
"I think I'm dying, Hermione. Finish me off now, please."
"Oh, you're not dying, I promise," Hermione said soothingly. "I think you've got the flu."
"But I've never been so sick in my life! And I'm thirsty; I want some water."
"I don't think that's a good idea."
"But my throat is so dry," she cried, tears and sweat mixing together on her cheeks. "And I can't take any potion either because she won't give me any more."
"Because you can't keep it down yet!" Hermione went to the head of the bed and smoothed the wet wisps of hair off Ginny's face.
"My bed is moving, Hermione. It's making me sick."
"Go to sleep, Gin," she shushed her softly. Ginny whimpered pitifully, trying to relax into her damp sheets, but her body trembled. After many minutes of moving uncomfortably, Ginny's breathing slowed and she fell asleep. Hermione stayed with her a little longer in case she woke but went back to her own bed eventually.
Madam Pomfrey came in to give Hermione breakfast at 7:30 as she always did. Ginny was still asleep, longer than she had all night. Hermione had a feeling Ginny's anxiety during the week and stress had also contributed to her feeling so incredibly sick. After eating, Hermione asked Madam Pomfrey if she might go for a small walk around the castle. Feeling she was strong enough to go to Gryffindor Tower and back, Madam Pomfrey let her. She changed into a set of clothing Ginny had brought up a while back and set off, passing a still sleeping Ginny on the way.
Hermione spotted Ron and Harry right away upon entering the common room. They were in the middle of a chess game. Hermione snuck up behind Ron, motioning for Harry to be quiet when he noticed her coming. She put her hands over Ron's eyes and said, "Guess who?" Ron reached up and felt her wrists and hands, then raised his eyebrows under her fingers. He took her hands down and turned around quickly.
"What are you doing up?" he exclaimed excitedly. "Did you sneak out?"
"Of course not! Madam Pomfrey let me take a walk."
"Well that's great! Sit down then. Are you tired? Do you feel ok?" She sat next to him at the table.
"Yes, I'm fine. I feel really good, actually."
"How is Ginny?" Harry asked.
"She was sick constantly all night. She's got the flu but I think her stress made it worse than it would have been. Actually, I think she got the flu from being so stressed and tired. She was asleep when I left her and hadn't been sick for about two hours. I think the worst of it's over." Ron shuddered.
"That was gross listening to her last night," he said.
"Hey, you weren't in there while she was doing it or almost get puked on," Harry said.
"Or listening all night. And think how Ginny feels," Hermione added. Ron nodded sympathetically.
"I think we should go see her," Harry said, standing up.
"I don't know, Harry," Hermione stopped him. "I think you should leave her be. She was hallucinating a little that her bed was moving and she was very embarrassed about the whole thing. Maybe you could come later, when she's a bit better." Harry frowned angrily and folded his arms across his chest.
"Fine."
Hermione stayed with them a couple hours then they walked her back to the hospital wing. Ron just wanted to make sure she arrived but Harry planned to go in and see Ginny. Hermione knew this was his intention so she decided she would go in first to see how Ginny was and then let the boys in.
Harry protested to Hermione making them wait at the door but she was adamant in checking on Ginny first so he conceded. Ron wasn't eager to see any more vomiting so he waited patiently.
When Hermione went in, Ginny was asleep but had changed nightclothes. She must be done, Hermione decided. A half empty potion bottle sat on the bedside table. Ginny snored quietly. Hermione smiled and went back to let Ron and Harry in. Harry immediately sat next to Ginny's bed while Ron took Hermione back to rest in her own bed.
Hermione, however, wasn't intent on sitting long. She didn't lie down in her bed as Ron had expected her too but sat on the edge as if she were about to leave somewhere. Ron looked at her questioningly.
"What are you doing?"
"Oh Ron, I don't want to sit in here again. I'm so bored of staring at these plain walls all day, especially on the weekend. Can't we go outside or something?"
"It's pretty chilly out and you've been walking around a lot today-"
"Ron, you know I've gotten a lot stronger this week and so what if it's chilly?"
"Just because you've gotten stronger doesn't mean you should go on a marathon all around the bloody school!"
"Don't swear! And I'm not asking for a marathon just a change of scenery and something else to keep my mind occupied! You try sitting around without any brain stimulation!"
"Hermione, you just had a change of scenery and it isn't a small walk between here and the common room. It's time to rest." She stood up and stalked past him.
"I'm perfectly fine!" He turned and stepped forward to grasp her forearm. "Let me go!"
"No, you're going to overtire yourself!" he said sternly. "If you sit here for a while, maybe you can eat lunch in the Main Hall with us." She narrowed her eyes.
"Don't you tell me what to do and act like I'm a child! I'm going outside!" She ripped her arm from his grip and walked quickly to the second section of the infirmary toward the door. Ron groaned loudly and made to follow her but she stopped. Her back was facing him and she paused as if in thought. All of a sudden she dropped to her knees, taking hold of her calf and gasping. Ron's eyebrows shot up in surprise and he ran to her.
"What is it, Hermione? What is it?" She whimpered as she gasped.
"Ow, oh ow, Ron my leg, it hurts! Oh, Ron! Uh." He stared at her, unsure of what to do. Harry moved forward to look. Ginny opened her eyes in confusion.
"Maybe massage it-" Ron took her calf and tried rubbing it through her jeans. She bit her lip as the pain continued even with Ron's attempt to help it. She sniffed, noticing tears coming down her cheeks. She pulled her leg away.
"It isn't helping. What do I do?" Suddenly the pain stopped. She stared at her calf in shock. Ron eyes were wide.
"What is it? Did it stop?"
"Yeah. It's gone but now I can't feel my calf; it's numb." She looked up at his astonished face.
"You can't feel it at all?" He grabbed her leg again and poked at it. "Nothing?" She shook her head hurriedly.
"It's numb! What's wrong with me!"
"Can you stand on it? Can you walk?" Ron pulled her up by her hands but she almost fell as she tried to put weight on both legs. Ron caught hold of her and held her up.
"I can't walk on it!"
"Well, I'll just have to…carry you to your bed then, I suppose." She was too surprised and worried to object. He bent a bit and put his arm under her knees as she put her arm around his neck. He took her over to her bed carefully, worried about bothering her leg, even though she couldn't feel it. Harry followed behind, not sure what they should do. Ron set her softly onto the sheets. "Can you move your foot?" She wiggled her toes.
"Oh, it's tingling, I feel something." She sighed in relief and Ron's face visibly relaxed.
"What's going on?" Ginny called out. Harry went back to tell her. Ron rubbed Hermione's calf vigorously to help get the feeling back in it quicker. After a few minutes she put a hand on his wrist.
"It's better, thank you."
"Well, what the Bloody Hell was that? Why were you in pain all of a sudden then it's numb?" Ron sat down next to her on the bed, his heart still racing from the scare.
"How should I know?"
"I told you it was time to rest and you go and get your leg all worked up!" He threw his hands up in the air.
"Don't start yelling at me again! I don't think walking a bit would do that to me! I've never heard of anything like it before. It isn't a normal reaction to walking."
"Well what else could have caused it? You're going too fast and trying to do too much!"
"Doing too much?" She stared at him in utter disbelief. "I've hardly done anything in a month! Stop acting like I'll break!"
"Look what just happened!"
"It wasn't from that!"
"Then what!" She looked at him, unable to answer. She just glared and threw herself into a laying position.
"Fine! You want me to lie and do nothing! Here you go!" He opened his mouth but had nothing to say. He crossed his arms.
"Good, thank you!"
"Oh, get out! I don't want you sitting there staring and gloating! Go away!"
"Great, I will!" He was hurt she would send him away like that but he did it. He jumped up and stalked out the door past Harry and Ginny. Hermione groaned loudly and threw her sheets up over her head.
Ginny looked at Harry, a bit shocked at the yelling her brother and Hermione had just been doing but also a bit amused.
"Well, that was…interesting," Ginny whispered, so Hermione couldn't hear.
"Yeah," Harry laughed softly. "So, how are you?" Ginny colored slightly, embarrassed.
"Oh, better now. I'm sorry again."
"Don't worry. You should probably go to sleep again as you didn't really all night." She nodded and scooted down into her sheets, happy to feel comfortable finally. He kissed her cheek and watched her close her eyes.
Ginny stayed sleeping for a long time while Harry sat and thought. End of year exams would be coming soon. He supposed he was ready for them though truth be told he wasn't studying as he knew Hermione was everyday she lay in the hospital wing. Harry finished his work each day though a lot was half-hearted. Charms and Defense he could do though his hair color changing charm had turned his hair purple instead of the red it was supposed to be. He cupped a hand under his chin and sighed. He knew he should be studying and working hard. Messing up spells was not something her should allow to happen. But he lacked the drive to remedy it. Ginny wasn't her normal self lately. Hermione wasn't around as much. Ron was basically the same though he had worries of his own to deal with. His life felt…blah. He would be on summer holiday soon enough but it was in the home of his lost godfather. Every inch of the house would yell out Sirius to him. And Malfoy, that slimy excuse for a human would be around. It would take all his strength just to let Malfoy live through the summer.
As he was thinking, a medium-sized grey owl flew in through the space of the door and dropped a note onto Harry's lap. It landed on his knee and cocking its head to the side, stared up at him with huge eyes. Harry raised an eyebrow and unfolded the parchment.
Harry, please come to my office today, as soon as possible. Though please, don't let me interrupt anything fun. Come at your leisure.
Prof. Dumbledore
Harry nodded to the owl. "I've got it." The owl snatched the slip from his fingers and set off back to the Headmaster, digging his claws into Harry's leg as he left. Harry yelped. He bit his lip in pain and looked at Ginny, making sure he didn't wake her. Well, it certainly wasn't fun thinking about what a failure he was there as she slept so he figured he'd head over and see the Headmaster. He touched Ginny's cheek quickly and looked in Hermione's direction, deciding if he should say something to her. Her back was to him as she lay on her side though he couldn't tell whether she was awake or asleep. He decided not to risk any yelling from her or physical anger she hadn't taken out on Ron. Without a word to her, he set off for Dumbledore's office.
The walk felt longer than ever as his thoughts continued to pester him. What could the Headmaster want? Hadn't they already discussed his crap summer? Hadn't he already been told to be a good boy from now on? Well, as far as not running off to Voldemort again in the last month, he'd achieved this promise. He could be a better student but some things were more important than others. As he walked down the final corridor to Dumbledore's gargoyle, Harry saw the long shadow of the Headmaster from the candles blazing along the hall. Dumbledore stood tall in front of his entrance, hands clasped at his stomach, a small glimmer of a smile on his face. Harry didn't feel like smiling back.
"Good afternoon, Harry."
"Hello, sir."
"I hope I didn't interrupt your day?"
"No, sir." Dumbledore looked over Harry's upset features and the small grin left his lips. He said his password and motioned for Harry to follow him to his office. As they reached it, Dumbledore motioned for Harry to sit and the headmaster went to his seat.
"How is Miss Weasley?"
"You know?"
"Yes."
"She's better. She's sleeping right now." Dumbledore didn't nod but continued to watch Harry.
"And Miss Granger?" Harry wasn't sure whether to mention the leg incident but he figured it was safe to.
"She had a bit of a leg cramp a bit earlier but it's all right now. She took a walk to the common room this morning and back."
"That's very good. Madame Pomfrey says she can return to her lessons Monday. Do you think she is ready?" Harry shrugged.
"Sure, I suppose. I don't know if Ron thinks so."
"Yes, the ones we love never want to let us do what is best for us, even if they know we should." Dumbledore looked almost wistful after this comment. "But we don't need to talk about such philosophical things right now. I asked you here to talk about Occlumency lessons." Harry nodded, remembering now that Dumbledore had planned to begin training him around that time. "Do you feel you are ready and up to it?"
"Do I have a choice?" Harry said, smiling slightly.
"Of course, but this is something I know you should do because it will be best for you. It doesn't mean I want you to but I will let you. If you had no burdens in your life…but that is not the case. It is important you learn to control the forces on your mind. So are you ready?"
"Right now?" Harry asked in confusion. Dumbledore smiled.
"No, no, not right now. I want to begin next week and have you begin exercises this week to prepare."
"You mean the whole clearing my mind thing before I go to bed?"
"Yes, that, and other things. You must be sure to eat well, sleep well, and keep a calm mind as much as possible. Do not let things cloud your judgment or anger you. Several times a day I want you to clear your mind completely as you do at night. Do not clear it at the same time each day. You must learn to clear it at random. Next Tuesday I'd like you to come here and we will work together, all right?" Harry nodded.
"Is something troubling you, Harry?" Harry looked into Dumbledore's eyes. There was no specific reason he wasn't happy, he just wasn't. He supposed he could mention going back to Grimmauld Place, since that thought was daunting him.
"You are not looking forward to summer, are you?" Harry lowered his eyes again and shrugged.
"Well, I am but sort of not." A wave of doubt and pain washed over him.
"I understand being in Sirius' home will be difficult. It was when you were there last summer, I am sure." Harry nodded, a small lump in his throat, though he knew it wouldn't bring tears. "But it is the safest place for you I feel. Your aunt's protection is considerably less now that Voldemort has your blood in him. And though he could not find you at your aunt's house, the Death Eaters can. They have no knowledge of Grimmauld Place."
"I know. But Malfoy-"
"I assure you, Mr. Malfoy will not know what it is used for or where we are. He will not be any harm."
"I still don't want him there. It isn't fair. It'll make Ginny really uncomfortable!"
"Ginny does not have to be around him very often. He will have his own room and little interaction need occur. At least no more than she has with him here."
"Well, I'll make sure she's never near him." Dumbledore smiled slightly.
"Really? How will you accomplish this? She will not be under your surveillance the entirety of your stay, will she? She will go where she likes in the house and Mr. Malfoy as well. How can you prevent them from running into each other completely?" Harry stared at him, not knowing what to say.
"Because…I can make sure he doesn't go wandering anywhere she might be."
"So he will never leave his room? You think that you can arrange a maid to take him food?"
"Well…I don't know! I'll just make sure he isn't around much! Why are you telling me they have to be around each other?" Dumbledore's smile was gone.
"I am not trying to say they will be forced to interact. I simply want you to have a realistic outlook on your stay this summer. The whereabouts of everyone will not be under your discretion. And Mr. Malfoy will not be willing to follow any orders you place on him over where he can be. I do not want you to think you will be in charge or that you can save Miss Weasley from uncomfortable circumstances the rest of her life, especially at Grimmauld Place. You have to just let things happen, and let them happen as smoothly as possible." Harry stared defiantly at the floor.
"May I leave now?" Dumbledore sighed and nodded.
"Yes, of course. I will see you next week. Please come here, to my office." Harry stood and began walking toward the door.
"Good afternoon, Harry. I will see you soon." Harry stopped and turned slightly to look at the Headmaster.
"Good bye, sir." Dumbledore bent his head then Harry walked the rest of the way out the door.
He wasn't sure if he wanted to go back to the Hospital Wing. He'd watched Ginny sleep plenty of times, and though he thought she was beautiful, he wasn't up for it. He wandered aimlessly in the direction of the infirmary but changed his mind when he was almost there and headed to Lupin's office instead.
Ginny woke suddenly when she felt Madam Pomfrey's hand on her shoulder.
"Wake up, Miss Weasley. You need some more potion and I want to talk to you." Ginny stared at her sleepily and rubbed an eye with the back of her hand. She yawned and sat up to take the last half of the potion she'd left when she fell asleep. It was sweet but it made her wrinkle her nose. Why couldn't they make potions taste better? They were wizards for goodness sake! "How do you feel?"
"Better," Ginny answered, taking a sip of water after she swallowed the potion. Madam Pomfrey nodded, but looked almost grave.
"Miss Weasley, from the tests I have conducted, I can confirm you did have influenza."
"Yes, I figured. It didn't feel like anything else. I-"
"You did not simply have influenza, I believe." Ginny looked at her uncertainly, licking her lips then pursing them together.
"Then what was it?"
"You did have the flu, but not bad. Not so bad that you should have been that sick. For you to have been sick all night tells me that you are overstressed and holding in some anxiety over something. The flu alone would not have made you act as you did last night. Your case is not that severe. You are feeling well now, correct?"
"Well, not completely better but yes, I feel a lot better."
"Yes, well then, you have stressed yourself to the point of sickness. Whatever problems or feelings you are having that is making you ill, you must calm these feelings. You must sleep more. How much sleep do you get each night?" Ginny shrugged, uncomfortable under the nurse's sharp look. "Well, you must make sure you retire to bed each night so that you will get at least eight hours of sleep a night. Whenever you must wake, you must count back eight hours and plan to go to bed then. Is that clear?" Ginny nodded. "You must keep yourself healthy, all right? Eat well, sleep well, and do not let your anxiety overtake you so that you become physically ill. All right?"
"All right." The nurse nodded and lifted a small bag of vials.
"These are sleeping potions. In case you cannot sleep, take one. No more than one each night, yes? I am only giving you two week's worth. Use them sparingly. Save them for the times you really need them."
"Thank you," Ginny said softly as Madam Pomfrey set the bag on her bedside table.
"You may leave when you are ready. Miss Granger will be leaving tomorrow evening and I would like you out by then as well. You may stay tonight if you wish." She patted Ginny gently on the shoulder and left the room with a swish of her white robes.
Ginny stared at the vials beside her. Had she really made herself sick? It wasn't as if she had purposely tried to do that. Could she have really put herself to that point? Apparently. She frowned. Well, she supposed she'd just have to learn to calm down…though she hadn't realized she had ever been that upset. Madam Pomfrey said she could leave when she was ready-and she was certainly ready. Now, unfortunately, this would always be the place where Harry told her about he prophecy. It would no longer be a comforting place where she could go when she was sick or someone else was ill. She didn't want to be there anymore. Her clothes, she imagined, were in the laundry with the house-elves so she didn't need to pack anything up, except to take the vials of sleeping potion. Those would surely come in handy.
Harry held up a fist to knock on Lupin's door but hesitated. Should he talk to him? Or should he write in his journal? Or should he just forget all his silly worries and stop being so childish? But Lupin always said he could tell him anything…Harry finally decided to knock and Lupin answered a moment later.
"Ah, Harry, hello. Come in, come in." Lupin stood aside as he opened the door wider and Harry came in, mumbling a greeting.
"I just thought with it being the weekend, we might have a little visit," Harry explained, feeling as though he needed a reason to be there.
"I'm glad," Lupin answered as he offered Harry one of two navy blue armchairs and a cup of tea. "Biscuit?" Harry shook his head but took the tea and sat down. Lupin sat across from him a moment later and looked at Harry's expression. "What's the matter?" Harry sipped his hot tea a few seconds then licked his lips.
"Well, nothing. Er, well, a few things. There isn't really a problem, well not a fixable one, but I just thought I'd get a few things off my mind."
"Certainly. Please, whenever you are ready." Harry sat pensively then took a biscuit from the table between them. He put it on his saucer then licked his lips again.
"I suppose I just don't want to go to Grimmauld Place this summer. It's one of the only times I've ever wanted to go to the Dursley's. I mean, I really don't want to go to the Dursely's, I just don't want to go to either one really." Lupin wasn't looking at him as Harry finished. Harry took a sip of tea.
"I understand, Harry." Harry almost felt like smiling. He knew Lupin would understand of all people. "I feel that way as well when I have to go there but I know that I must. Going there is healthy for you, for both of us, and it is the safest place for you."
"I know, Dumbledore already told me."
"But that doesn't make going any easier, does it?"
"No. I don't want to look at the house…it just reminds me of Sirius."
"Yes, it is difficult to look around and think of him happily."
"I want to but I miss him. I want him to be at Grimmauld Place, not just in my memory."
"But being there for such a long period of time will help you get over it. It will make thinking of him less painful."
"Did it make it less painful for you?" Lupin smiled.
"Not yet. I hope it will though. That is my plan at least. And having your friends there will take your mind away from the pain."
"Maybe. But Malfoy will be there."
"Yes, I know. The best I can tell you is to keep your cool and accept that he is there, no matter your feelings toward him."
"Yeah, I'll try but no guarantees."
"All anyone asks of you is to try your hardest." Harry nodded solemnly. He felt strangely better now. It wasn't Lupin telling him he had to do anything, except try. It wasn't even that he resented Dumbledore for what he said; it just made it easier with Lupin.
"Thanks. I should go see how Ginny is. She got sick last night."
"Yes, I'm aware. Well, visit me again soon and we can have a happier conversation, hmm?"
"Yeah, soon. Bye." Harry shook Lupin's hand and headed back to the Hospital Wing.
Author's Note: More apologies for the huge space in time from my last update. Junior year has been hard and stressful but I worked on this when I could. I hope it wasn't too boring and worth the wait. Next chapter will be up sooner, I swear. Thanks all!
Oh, also, let me do a bit of self-advertising. I wrote a couple of one-shots (they are BOTH one-shots, so no more chapters will be added to them, in case anyone was confused) that can be found under my penname. One is about Ron and Hermione in the snow…very cute IMO and the other a bit angsty and dramatic but the idea was floating around for a while and I wanted it out. So…please read them! Thanks!