Now three months had passed, since Alexandra was torn from Jonathan´s life. Three months without her, without a message from her, without knowing, where she was, if she was okay – if she was alive at all!
Jonathan
still pursued all news coming from Europe. Many cities in Germany and
France had been destroyed and lots of people had lost their homes,
but it looked like the end of the war was near to come. But to
Jonathan it was hard to believe it and to hope, that it´ll
happen soon. But he neither could nor even wanted to lose hope! Being
full of hope, that Alexandra was still alive and that he would see
her again, was now the only thing remaining to him
- the only
thing giving him enough strength to suffer his current life.
Mrs. Crane and Jonathan didn´t talked to each other almost a week now. She heard him groaning and screaming the night after their dispute, but she neither knocked at the door of his room to ask what happened nor she asked him about it the following days . It wouldn´t be the only night she heard him groaning and screaming when he was in his room. Mrs. Crane noticed that after a night like this, Jonathan always took his used sheets to launder them by himself. On the day after their dispute she found a towel, obviously forgotten by Jonathan, to launder it too. The towel was smeared all over with his semen. Mrs. Crane knew what this meant. Her son wasn´t a child anymore with his 17 years! And although Jonathan never told her, she knew that he has lost his virginity to Alexandra the night they´ve spent together in the cabin. Or had they slept together for a longer time already and Mrs. Crane just didn´t know about it? She now was aware of the fact that at least physically Jonathan wasn´t a little boy anymore - and it was up to her now to treat him accordingly.
Maybe she hadn´t been aware enough of his condition when they had their dispute. On the one hand, he recently had discovered his sexuality, on the other hand, the person, who discovered and shared his sexuality with him, was suddenly torn from his life without any early warning. It was obvious, that these nights where she heard him groaning and screaming were nights where he worked off his rage in a sexual way – maybe his one and only way to work off his sorrow for Alexandra. How could she blame him at all?
I was too hard on him.´, Mrs. Crane thought by herself.
She called him into the living-room this afternoon when Jonathan got home back from school again. Without saying anything he heard her apologizing to him for slapping him that day. Mrs. Crane promised him to listen better to her son, to be there for him and to help him, whenever he would need her help. Jonathan´s dark expression on his face started to bright up. He also apologized to his mother for his comment made on their dispute and both embraced each other. Jonathan was relieved to have resolved with her – he has enough problems already, he even didn´t need anymore, especially not with his mother.
Mrs.
Crane embraced Jonathan. She was happy, that all was cleared up now
– but she could feel, that her son wasn´t the same as
before...