Chapter Nineteen

When Ron came to, he immediately regretted not staying unconscious. His head was pounding and his skin felt hot and clammy. His vision was hazy at first, and that was why he had mistaken the look on Harry's face for one of genuine concern, instead of extreme fury.

"You fucking idiot," Harry snarled, looming over him.

"Harry, that's enough," Tonks said gently and pushed him back to give Ron some breathing room.

Ron recognized his surroundings as a St. Mungo's hospital room before it hit him. "Hermione? Where is she?"

"We don't know," Lupin answered, fielding the question.

"We were hoping you might know something," Tonks added.

Ron fought to think over the throbbing in his head. "We were heading for the abandoned village near Azkaban," he started slowly. "I don't remember much except telling Hermione I was feeling sick, like my whole body was just shutting down, and then I passed out."

"Are you sure that's all you remember?" Harry pressed.

"Do you think I would leave anything out if I thought it could help us find Hermione?"

"The Aurors have already searched the village and found no sign of her," Tonks interrupted the boys. "There was evidence to suggest that someone had been hiding out there for some time."

"So what happens now?" Ginny asked.

"The Aurors are already expanding their search around the abandoned village. If there were Death Eaters waiting for you they may be taking temporary cover somewhere. Of course, we also have to consider the possibility that they apparated out of there with Hermione," Tonks finished with a sigh.

"How come they left Ron?" Harry asked.

"If Ron lost consciousness before they reached the village and Hermione proceeded on her own, they may have thought she was alone and not gone searching for him," Tonks told him.

Harry had heard enough. No Death Eater would be stupid enough to hang around in what had been an obvious trap from the start and a place that the Aurors could get to quickly. No, they would be long gone by now and there might be only one person who knew where they would take her.

He tore from the room, ignoring the questioning shouts he got from Lupin and Tonks. He had barely gone more than a few angry steps when Tonks and Lupin apparated in front of him.

"Where do you think you're going?" Tonks demanded.

That should have been obvious. "I'm going to find the bastard who knows where she is!"

"After the information you gave us, we informed Mackenzie and she has Jack Anderson under close observation. But other than Draco Malfoy's word we have no evidence connecting him to Death Eater activity," Tonks informed him.

Harry raked his fingers through his hair in a gesture of hopelessness. "Why would she leave Ron like that? What was she thinking?"

"Harry, she wasn't thinking clearly. The charm is affecting her judgment, and if Ron's stopped working then there's a good chance the same has happened with hers," Lupin said.

That meant she could be in as rough shape as Ron, maybe worse. Add to that she was in the hands of Death Eaters and Harry wasn't sure there could be a good outcome from this. Tonks and Remus could talk until they were blue in the face, but he wasn't going to let them stop him from finding her. He would not let Hermione go through the same tortures he had as a Death Eater prisoner.

He pushed his way past the two of them, ignoring their pleas for him to stay and think this through rationally.

While Harry was charging out of St. Mungo's, his choice of destination already in mind, he had no idea that someone had overheard the entire conversation and planned on beating him to the Ministry.

When Harry arrived at the Department of Experimental Charms, he saw the witch at reception, talking off the ear of the security wizard who had come to investigate an unauthorized entry.

"He came in here demanding to see Jack Anderson, and when I told him he wasn't here he went tearing through his office. I don't think he's all there. He looks like he's got some sort of illness," the witch explained.

"I'll take it from here," Harry said, flashing his Auror badge.

"It's about time the Aurors showed up," the witch huffed.

Harry ignored her continued ramblings as the security wizard took her statement.

It wasn't difficult for him figure out which office was Anderson's. It looked like every inch of it had been pulled apart. He found Ron leaning heavily against a metal cabinet.

"He's not here," he said, his voice hoarse.

"Ron, what the hell are you doing here? You don't even look like you should be standing."

"Why didn't you tell me about Anderson?" He demanded.

"I only just found out," Harry told him, knowing if he was going to calm down Ron he was going to have to calm down himself first.

"We have to find her, Harry," he said, his voice hoarse.

"We will," he stated with confidence he didn't quite feel. "Moody has everyone he can spare out looking for her."

"It's not good enough!" Ron shouted. "If the Death Eaters have her, that means she's been in their custody for hours. Do you know what they'll do to her, Harry?" He tried to block the onslaught of mental images filling his head.

"We'll go back to Malfoy – get him to tell us everything he knows."

"I won't trust a word that comes out of that bastard's mouth."

"He told us the truth about Anderson," Harry pointed out. "He knows how important Hermione is to us and if he wants any chance of the Order protecting him he'll tell us what we need to know." He couldn't tell if Ron believed him or not, but Harry had to get him out of there and back to St. Mungo's. "Ron, we need to get out of here." He didn't know if other Aurors were on their way. It would just mean more trouble if he couldn't get Ron out of there before that happened.

"I'm not going back to the hospital," he said to Harry. "I'm not going back there until I know Hermione's safe."

Harry didn't want to have to do this but it was for Ron's own good. He pulled out his wand and aimed it at Ron.

Ron's eyes widened in betrayal. "You fuck – "

The stunning spell hit him hit Ron in the chest and sent him sprawling to the floor. Harry bent over his friend to check his vitals and was glad to hear Ron's steady breathing. Armed with the knowledge that he would be facing an extremely pissed off Ron when he woke up, he went to tell the witch at reception to get a team from St. Mungo's there right away.

Ginny watched as Harry continued to pace back and fourth in the hospital waiting room area. It was beginning to make her dizzy. She needed to find something else to focus on.

"They've been in there forever," he said, annoyed. "What's taking so long?"

"It's only been twenty minutes," she told him.

He glared at her for a moment and then resumed his pacing.

"Harry, stop. You're going to wear a hole in the floor."

She expected another glare thrown her way but the door opened to one of the Healer offices and Tonks, Moody and Lupin filed out.

"What did he tell you?" Harry demanded to know. If Malfoy was leading them on some wild Hippogriff chase he was going to be sorry.

"We got more vague accounts than we did solid leads out of him, but we'll check them all out," Tonks said to him.

"So where do we start?" Harry said, anxious to begin.

"We don't start anywhere," Tonks corrected. "You're going back to Remus's with Ginny. Molly and Arthur will stay with Ron. When we have news we'll come for you."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Harry exploded. He had already been running on edge when they had left him out of interrogating Malfoy.

"This is no joke, Potter," Moody said in a sharp voice. "You're going to be an Auror so get used to following orders. You're too emotionally involved to think clearly."

"Of course I'm emotionally involved! She's my best friend. She's – " He stopped, knowing his protests would be lost on Moody. He didn't understand things like humanity and compassion. His only hope was Lupin.

"I'm sorry, Harry," said Remus, his voice low. "I agree with Alastor."

Harry was livid. This was part of what being an Auror was all about and they were purposely keeping him out of it.

"Harry, this is an order from a senior Auror," Tonks said, her voice the strictest anyone had ever heard it. "As an order, I expect you to follow it. Don't make me write you up for disobeying a superior."

This is bullshit, Harry fumed. How could they expect him to just sit around and do nothing?

"Bill is taking Malfoy to one of the safe houses the Aurors used to use. We'll keep him there until we figure out what to do with him," Tonks explained.

"Let's go. We'll pick up Mundungus and Shacklebolt on the way," Moody said.

While Moody and Lupin were walking away, Tonks pulled Ginny aside and said, "watch out for him. Make sure he doesn't do anything Harry-like."

Then the Auror hurried her footsteps to catch up with Moody and Lupin, leaving the two teens in the empty hallway.

"This is bullshit!" Harry exclaimed, letting Lupin's front door slam shut. "I don't know what the hell they're thinking. There's a shortage of Aurors. Moody should be taking all the help he can get. Instead he's telling me to sit here and wait."

"I don't need a babysitter, Harry," Ginny said sharply, her temper short as well after listening to him rant and rave about being left out of the search.

"That's not what I meant," he said, flopping down onto the couch.

"Moody, Tonks, Remus – they all care about Hermione. Do you really think they would go to any less lengths than you would?" She questioned and he turned to look in the other direction. "Harry, they'll do whatever it takes to find her."

He was still refusing to look at her, or even acknowledge any of the things she said. Frustrated, she decided to change the subject altogether. "Look, it's late. Why don't you spend the night in Ron's old room? Remus turned it into a guest room, so the bed's already made."

"I'm not tired," he said stubbornly.

"No, you exhausted and stressed out with worry."

"I already told you I'm fine. I'm not sleeping until I know Hermione's all right."

Taking matters into her own hands, Ginny pushed him back on the couch until he was flat on his back. "Tonks warned me you'd be like this," she said, hovering over him, to keep him lying down.

"Oh? And what did she say about me?"

"She said you'd be difficult, and I should have told her you're difficult most of the time."

Now Harry wasn't saying anything and she realized the current position they were in, with her straddling Harry's waist and his intense emerald gaze fixed on her.

"I'm hungry," she abruptly announced and started to move off him. "Do you want something –"

Harry cut off her words by pressing his lips to hers and grabbing her waist to hold her in place.

She resisted at first. There was a reason why she had ended whatever it was that had been going on between her and Harry. She knew that he cared for her, but deep down she also knew he would never be able to commit to anything. Just a few short hours ago she had been so angry with Harry that never laying eyes on him again would have been too soon for her. And here she was letting him screw around with her head again. Why did she have to be so weak? But she seemed to forget all those valid reasons as Harry pulled her down on top of him.

She felt his hands move around to the front of her jumper and helped him pull it off. His shirt joined it on the floor shortly after. This was already well-explored territory between them, even though she knew she should stop this before it all spiraled out of control – should have stopped it before it had started. The problem was she lost all sense of logic and reason as Harry unclasped her bra and slid the straps off her shoulders.

When Ginny awoke, she was alone on the couch with a blanket covering her. She dressed quietly and headed upstairs.

She didn't expect to find Harry so easily. In fact she had not even been sure he would still be there. But he was sitting in the window seat of the spare bedroom looking outside. She stood in the doorway for a time watching him, until he finally noticed her.

He didn't say anything at first, just stared at her for a bit before turning back to the window. "I'm sorry," he breathed, letting his head hang a bit.

The apology hit Ginny in the chest like a stunning spell. It wasn't what someone who had just lost their virginity wanted to hear. But the logical part of her mind told her she knew this would happen. One shag wouldn't fix things between her and Harry.

"It's okay, Harry," she said her voice soft.

His head snapped up, surprised by her words.

"You were worried about Hermione and so was I," she continued. "I'm not expecting anything from you." In truth, she wasn't. She knew that Harry would never be able to commit to her. It hurt to accept, but it was less painful than setting herself up with false hope. She refused to do that anymore.

Harry shifted in his seat, so for that brief second he wouldn't have to look at her, so it wouldn't make him feel like any more of a bastard than he already did.

Ginny left the room then and headed for the loo to shower. When she emerged back into the hall twenty minutes later, Harry was still where she had left him. She was starting to wonder if there might be something else wrong with him.

Still having some reservations, she joined him on the window seat. It was a somewhat tight fit for two people and her leg brushed up against his but he showed no reaction.

"Harry?"

"Hmm?"

"What's wrong?"

He didn't answer, nor would he even look at her.

Instead of pressing him further, which rarely ever worked with Harry, she reached up and ran a hand through his tousled hair, not realizing what she was doing until it was already happening. She let her hand drop. Harry didn't protest the contact.

"I keep thinking about how mad I was at Ron and Hermione for the very same thing that happened last night," he said to her.

Ginny listened attentively, knowing how rare it was for Harry to be this open.

"After the Auror exam, Hermione met us in the Atrium and we went into the Ministry wizarding city. You already know what happened, but when I was back here and found out they had spent the night together I resented them for it."

She didn't know what to say to his admission, so she stayed silent. Then she felt Harry's hand seek out hers and give it a brief squeeze.

"What is this?" He asked, his eyes searching hers.

"I don't know," she responded, "but it has to stop." She pulled her hand out from under his. "Harry, I can't wait for you forever, and I don't think you want this either."

"Then why does this feel so comfortable?" He knew it wasn't fair to her going down this road again. The best thing he could do for both of them was to leave her alone, but there was something about Ginny that he couldn't get over her enough to really move on.

"You can use the shower now," she said, standing up. She left, not sure what else to do about their situation at the moment.

Harry walked out of the loo, not feeling any better than when he had gone in there. He reached the top of the stairs hearing another voice aside from Ginny's. He hurried downstairs, recognizing the other voice instantly and hoped he had brought good news.

Bill was leaning against the kitchen counter while Ginny sat at the table, her face content but serious. When Harry showed up in the doorway, she smiled at him but it was guarded.

"They found Hermione. She's at St. Mungo's," she told him.

Harry wanted to be relieved, but the serious look on Bill's face wouldn't allow that. "Is she all right?" He asked Ginny's brother.

"That damn charm stopped working so she was basically in the same state as Ron when they brought her in. The Healers ran all the same tests on her but they found a lot of erratic brain patterns."

"What do you mean?"

"They said it's consistent with someone who has overused highly potent levels of magic, including wandless magic, which shouldn't even be possible." Now Harry looked as worried as his sister, so Bill said, "she's in stable condition, so you can both see her. Remus has already spoken with her dad and they're sending someone to bring him in. Gin, why don't you go pack up some of Hermione's things and then we'll go?"

Ginny nodded wordlessly and left the kitchen.

Bill turned a steely look on Harry when she was gone. "Do you want to tell me what the hell happened here last night?"

Harry swallowed. There was no way Ginny would have told him, but he had probably seen the mess in the living room when he walked in. "I don't know what you're talking about," Harry replied, probably a little too slowly.

Bill looked more furious than when Percy had showed up at The Burrow for Christmas last year. "I told Tonks it was a bad idea sending the two of you here alone."

"She's not your baby sister anymore," said Harry, not backing down. He wasn't going to let Bill intimidate him.

"No, she's sixteen and your seventeen and you two are screwing around when you both have no idea what you want. I think my sister would be a lot happier if you could keep your hormones in check and stay the hell away from her."

Bill didn't have to tell him what he already knew. But knowing that didn't make it any easier for Harry to accept.