Tobikunai: Ooohkay, here goes! The splendid, the fabulous, the extraordinary, the game I can't beat no matter how hard I try: FINAL FANTASY SEVEN!

Kansatsu: Here goes nothing. Literally.

Tobikunai: HEY! What's that supposed to mean?

Kansatsu: Duh.

Tobikunai: AUGH! Tellmetellmetellme!

Disclaimer: Sigh... I don't own Kingdom Hearts or FF7. Damn. Wait, that means I don't own Vinn-chan either, doesn't it? NOOOOOO!

Chapter Two:

o-:Midgar: What Do You Call a Creep With a Labcoat? -o

"Oooohkay." said Darkside slowly, "Which door was which again?"

"I don't know!" Riku snapped.

Sabor groaned. Guard Armor sighed. Axel began a rant about how unfair it was that Riku was the leader, when he was obviously so much smarter and more talented. The other members feigned coughing fit to hide their laughter.

"I see Director-sama never did get those signs on the doors." AntiSora observed, looking around at the familiar-yet-confusing studio hallway.

"Almost makes you feel sorry for all those guys who kept getting our set, ne? I mean, remember the mask guy? Imagine having to die, like, 10 times in a row, just because some idiot keeps forgetting his lines." Guard Armor said.

"People-"

"I know!" Parasite Cage jumped in "And there was that dog... thing and the one girl...I feel sorry for them, having to chase after that... what was it?"

"People, I'm talking to you..."

"A demon, I think." Sabor answered, "His name was Sess or somethin'."

"PEOPLE! SHUT UP!"

Everony stared blankly at BHK. Everone except Axel, who was saying something about how all at once he could stand on his head, beat Final Fantasy X-2 and sing 1/2 without stumbling over the words which, apparently, was another reason he was better than Riku. If that was the only advantage he had over Riku (which it was) he was certainly not going to replace him as leader anytime soon, or anytime at all, really, a fact which Darkside wasted no time in pointing out to him.

"Anyway," BKH continued, as though every syllable spoken politely to these idiots was a struggle, "We don't even know where we're going. Why don't we just pick a door at random?"

"Okay." Riku agreed, "Here goes-!"

"Eenie, meenie, miney, mo, catch a tiger by 'is toe! If 'e hollers, let 'im go, eenie, meenie, miney, mo!" Axel recited. Two people, five Heartless, and a leopard all smacked him over the head. Then Riku kicked him. Twice.

"What was that for?" Axel groaned.

"The first one was for the missing shark," Riku said proudly.

"Wha' 'bout the sec'nd one?" Axel moaned as he lost conciousness.

Riku rolled his eyes. "Jeez, I gotta have a reason for everything?"

---

(The FFVII Studio)

"Okay, -Scene Where Hojo Rambles About Nothing-, Take 3, ACTION!"

The lunatic in the white labcoat glared at the director. "I do not ramble about nothing."

"Yes you do." commented a black-haried bishounen from offstage.

"Aw, what do you know, Vincent?" Hojo muttered.

"A hell of a lot more than you." the bishounen retaliated.

The director groaned. "HOJO, SAY YOUR LINES! Vincent... I dunno. Leave the crazy people alone. Hey, there's no reason to get pissed at me! HEY! Remember the rules! No limit break transformations in the building!"

"Hmm. Fine."

"AHEM!" Hojo called as though he had not been the one to interrupt the take in the first place, "Moving along!"

"Yes, fine, whatever." The director said.

"Finally. Ahem. 'Probably 120 years. It's probably impossible to finish in our life time.Or in the lifetime of the specimen too, for that matter. That's why we're thinking of breeding her. Then we could-' Matte, what was that sound?"

And into the room burst -yup, you guessed it- two people, five heartless, and a leopard. The first member of the group was kicking an unconcious, redheaded, black-cloaked guy out of his way.

"Hey, ummm... freak in the lab coat? Are you interested in-"

"No! I don't want any Avon products!" the scientist snapped.

The entire cast of Final Fantasy VII (including every single NPC) and the MCCRL sweatdropped. "I'm afraid you... ermm... misunderstood." Riku said "We were wondering if you wanted to join the MCCRL-"

"What's that?" the phycopathic scientist asked skeptically, "Wait... You're from the asylum, aren't you! Well tell them I'm NEVER going back, NEVER! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"That explains some things." Vincent muttered.

"Hey wait!" a man with spikey blond hair was running towards them. "Is that a man in a black cape?" he asked, pointing to the still-KO 'd Axel.

"Ummm... yeah. Why?" asked Riku, a bit weirded out.

"The man in the black cape?" the spikey-haired guy asked.

"Oh." Riku finally realized what needle-head was geting at. "Yes. Yes, he is." he confirmed with a malicious smile.

"Just as I thought." The-great-pointy-headed-ness said with a smile that would have made Seta Soujiro seem gloomy. "GET HIM!"

Two people (and yes, this time they were both people) jumped out from some unknown location. "DIE, SEPHIROTH!" screamed the first, a brown-haired young girl.

"YEAH! DEATH T' SEPHIROTH!" shouted the second, a man with a gun on his arm.

And the poor director just buried his face in his hands.

Tobikunai: Yokatta! n.n Well? Did you guys like it?

Kansatsu: (slaps forehead) You only have one reader, baka.

Tobikunai: (hmph) Yeah, I guess so... thanks so much, Hiei's Ice Angel! n.n I really appriciate it! I think you said once that you havn't played FF7, but hopefully you enjoyed this anyway. n.n

In the Next Chapter:

Spira! Will the MCCRL have any luck with the recriutment of our least favorite Guado? Will the party ever decide just whose story it is, anyway? And will Axel ever not get beaten up? Well, that's what the fic is for! Read it!