Dream a Little Dream

By: Cece Williams

((Disclaimer: Okay, here's where I stand: If I DID own YYH, I wouldn't be living in a one-horse town here.))

Cece: Well, after a good day off, I figured to keep going until this story's over.

Kurama: Good idea. Then you have to work on some others.

Cece: Yep. Well, anyway, read on. Hope y'all like.

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Kurama had just gotten home from everything that had happened. His mind was swimming as he lay down on his bed and looked at the ceiling. What was Kurama's real reason for saving Andrea earlier that night? Could it just have been instinct, or was it something totally different? Maybe a good night's sleep would clear everything up.

However, just when he was almost asleep, Kurama blinked his emerald green eyes as Youko talked to him telepathically.

"That's it, Shuichi; just go to sleep," Youko said to him softly as he knew his human side's struggle to stay awake.

Kurama shook his head, trying to keep his eyes open. "I cannot. She might awake anytime," he answered.

"What? At 12:30AM, she's still out."

"You never know. She might wake..." Kurama never finished his sentence. And as Youko said his human name, he saw that the redhead was finally asleep.

"Good, he's asleep... now to slip into his mate's mind..." With that, Youko slipped out of his human body and flew to the hospital window where Andrea still lay in her hospital bed. Smiling, he went inside her mind.

(Inside Andrea's Mind)

Andrea started walking down a dark hallway, wearing her long, dark-blue nightshirt, which almost went down to her ankles. Her face, however, didn't look relaxed. "I'm just making Kurama and the others suffer, and I don't want them to," she said as she looked up and saw a bright light. "Maybe that's the way out..." She started back walking down the hallway, unaware that Youko was right behind her. "I can't let him suffer like this... I can't let him worry about me..."

"Andrea, stop."

Andrea froze in mid-step and blinked. The voice sounded familiar, but yet it was different.

"Turn around."

Andrea obeyed the voice but looked down at the floor, not wanting whoever the voice was to see the pain in her eyes. "Why?"

"Do you know me?"

Andrea looked up, and as she saw the silver hair and fox ears, her voice crammed into her throat. She knew exactly who it was. "Youko..." she said before turning back around and trying not to break down.

Youko's fox ears twitched as he heard the girl in front of him struggling to gain her well-guarded composure, but she was failing horribly. "Why are you upset?" he asked her.

Andrea couldn't turn back around. "I'm torturing him!" she answered, making an audible sniffle. "All month, every day..."

"He is worried for you, yes, but torture, no."

"You don't understand." Andrea leaned against the wall of her mind. "I mean emotionally, he'll probably get an ulcer or something for worrying about me for this long. And he doesn't need to."

Youko placed a hand on her shoulder. "Shuichi is worried for you very much, but if you leave forever, you'll hurt him even more."

Andrea turned her head away. "He won't need to worry about me anymore," she answered.

Youko towered over the young girl in front of him. "Yes, that's true. But imagine what would happen if you do walk through that door. What do you believe would happen?" he asked her.

Andrea shrugged her shoulders. "Can't be any worse than what I had to go through," she answered. "My parents are dead, my adopted parents, too... having to witness people dying all around me..."

"What of your friends?"

"Most of them either died or moved away."

Youko raised an eyebrow. "Really? I seem to remember quite a few people worried about you when you were hurt." As he saw Andrea looking at the door, he continued. "There was Yusuke and Keiko..."

"Keiko's the smart one," she answered.

"That she is. And Kuwabara and Yukina..."

"The one couple Hiei prays won't happen." As Andrea looked at the door again, she felt Youko's hand slip off of her shoulder as she started again to the door that would take away everything.

Youko knew he had to stop her, so he kept naming off different people, trying to get her to stop. "What about Hiei? And Koenma and Botan?"

"Hiei can knock them out easily."

Youko knew there was one person left, the one person who could possibly stop Andrea from making a terrible mistake. "What about Shuichi?"

Hearing Kurama's human name, she stopped in mid step again and looked at the floor.

Youko had hit the jackpot; he got her to stop. "How do you think he would feel if you went away?"

"He'll be fine; he's a tough guy. He can handle it," she answered.

Youko's ears twitched at her answer, not one that he expected, but at least she wasn't walking again. "Physically, or emotionally?"

"Both." Then, almost as suddenly as she stopped, she continued walking towards the door again. "I don't want him to suffer by sitting by me every day, knowing I can't wake up."

Youko shook his head. Here he went again. Shuichi was right about one thing with Andrea; she was stubborn. "What if you never wake up?" he asked.

Andrea continued to walk as she spoke. "He would have preferred me to slip away quietly into the night."

"Andrea, stop and think about this for a second!"

She stopped all right, with her fists clenched. She was so close now! In the back of her mind, she was alone. And that was what she was feeling at the moment. "What's to think about?"

Youko grabbed her arms and turned her around, making Andrea face him whether she wanted to or not. "Shuichi, baka!" he answered, shaking her with the first two words of his answer. "Think about Shuichi! And all your other friends in this world. Botan had to put one friend in Reikai already before she was wished back. You think she wants to do that a second time!"

Andrea looked at the floor, forgotten tears welling in her eyes. She couldn't let them fall; she wouldn't. "Shuichi will be fine. He doesn't need a girl who almost got him killed!"

"You think he minds protecting you! You think he despises a person who needs his constant protection at every situation! He doesn't! He's a warrior! It's what he does! He cares enough for you to take care of you when you're hurt. He cares for you!"

As Andrea continued to look at the floor, the tears wanted out of her eyes, but she was trying to hang on to what composure she had left. "Just how much?" she asked quietly.

"Enough to stay up all night, praying that the phone would ring and the doctors saying you're awake and healthy," Youko answered, glad to hear Andrea's meek voice.

But Andrea turned from meek into concerned as she shot straight up like an arrow. "He did what!" she asked him in disbelief.

Youko nodded. She had a right to know what Shuichi had been like for the whole month. "He stays up every night. Waiting for the phone to ring. Waiting for you to wake up."

With everything Youko was saying to her, Andrea's self-control was hanging by a thread. But there was still one question she needed to ask. "Did he say anything?"

"He says, 'I can't go to sleep. She might wake at any time. I have to be there for her when she does.' It's the same every night."

Finally, Andrea cracked like an egg smashing on the kitchen floor. She couldn't stay steady anymore and she suddenly dropped to the floor and buried her face in her hands as Youko held onto her. The tears that had been struggling to fall finally did and slid down her cheeks. "He wants me to come back?" she asked.

Youko nodded, his silver bangs swishing in front of his golden eyes. "Very much. Took him hours before he finally went to sleep tonight."

Andrea felt like a rag doll when she heard his answer and dried her now-wet eyes. "I bet he thinks I'm selfish right now..."

Youko shook his head. "He never thought that lowly of you. And I should know."

Letting out a sniffle, she asked, "What does he think of me?"

"He thinks you're a very brave young lady who just needs a little help to find herself on the right path. And he believes he is that help."

"Even though my life's not a bed of roses?" As Youko nodded, Andrea continued. "And what do you think of me?"

Youko smiled down at her, trying to get the young girl in front of him to do the same. "Same as Shuichi. You are a brave girl, and I would be honored for you to be with Shuichi."

Andrea blinked in confusion. "Be with him?" When Youko nodded, she tilted her head to the side, still horribly confused. "As in?"

"Being his friend, his companion, whatever you wish yourself to be."

Once again, Andrea looked at the floor. "It's been about two years... there were times when I wanted to tell him... but I couldn't."

"You're afraid he won't accept you?"

Andrea's eyes took a low, more of a melancholy look. "I know he's scared to get close to people like that."

Youko noticed that Andrea's attitude changed almost drastically. There was almost like a longing in her voice, a longing for something she thought she could never have. "Andrea, look at me." When Andrea didn't move, he blinked. "Come on. Have I suddenly deformed in the last few minutes? Look at me."

Andrea looked up slowly, waiting to hear what he was going to say.

"Andrea, I may be a demon, but even I know about emotions. You may think that this will help Shuichi feel better, but it won't. He's hurting, a little bit yes, but if you go away forever, then the pain he feels right now will double a thousand times fold. Believe me, I know what it's like to lose someone you care about, and I do not wish that to happen to Shuichi." Youko's golden eyes turned into what Andrea's eyes were already as he thought of his partner, Koronue. /1/

After an uneasy minute of silence, Andrea finally broke it. "I didn't tell Shuichi this, but the night after he killed Karasu..." She took a deep breath, trying to figure out how to play out the words. "Shizuru asked me what if Toguro had pointed at him instead of Kuwabara."

Youko looked back at Andrea. "And how did you answer?"

"I don't think I could take it."

"Andrea, Shuichi would feel the same if it was you who was targeted and not Kuwabara. He wouldn't take it." Other that he's desperately in love with you, but he can't figure that out, he added to himself.

Andrea blinked at him. "He wouldn't take it, and he's worse off than the beginning of the round?"

"Andrea, I'm not making the decision for you, but I just want you to think about what you're doing for a second," Youko said, pointing one of his clawed fingers to the door Andrea was facing. "If you walk through that door, there are no second chances. You can't pass go and you can't collect those two hundred dollars. /2/ It's the point of no return. /3/ You enter there, and you ain't coming back."

Andrea let the realization seep inside her for a moment until it finally hit her. "If I walk through that door, I'll never see him again?" As Youko nodded, Andrea looked at the door again. "And that means I can't tell him that I love him," she said out loud, not really stopping herself.

Youko, however, wasn't surprised by her words. In fact, he had known all along. "Yes. It does," he answered.

Andrea recoiled slightly from what she had just heard. She thought no one heard what she had just said that, but as the last few seconds replayed in her mind, her blue eyes widened. "Oh, my God... that didn't come out, did it?"

Youko pretended not to hear what he heard Andrea say about Shuichi. "Said what?" he asked her innocently.

"I can't believe I just said that."

Youko blinked his gold eyes. "I didn't hear you say anything."

Andrea looked at the door, the tears starting to well in her eyes again. She felt she was lying to herself; why would Kurama waste his time with her instead of doing what he should have been doing? She felt like she was during the Dark Tournament, when she heard it first from the girls…

(Start Flashback)

In the stands, however, Andrea was confused. "What are they talking about down there?" she asked.

Botan looked at the arguing group. "I think they're talking about a certain blue-eyed girl who's got Kurama by the heartstrings," she answered.

Andrea looked at her. "What did you just say?" she asked.

"Come on, admit it," Botan answered her, despite Shizuru trying to shut the blue-haired girl up. "You're in love with Kurama, aren't you?"

"What?" Andrea was stunned, upset, and surprised all at once. "How could you say something so stupid as that?"

(End Flashback)

The answer was almost as plain as day. But there was no way Andrea was going to admit it. Not in front of the girls, the guys, Youko, and especially Shuichi Minamino. Shuichi… the main reason why she had returned to Japan…

(Start Flashback)

Andrea leaned her head onto Kurama's shoulder. "I'm sorry I didn't write back," she said, her voice growing quiet.

He patted her back. "Daijoubu, Andrea-chan," he answered calmly. "Why are you back?"

"I promised you I'd be back, remember?" Andrea answered, smiling.

Kurama smiled as well. "And I know you always keep your promises," he answered.

"I couldn't leave you behind, though. So, that's why I left Florida... for good."

Although Kurama's face looked relieved, his eyes were now full of shock. "Why have you left Florida?"

"Well, Kurama, it was two major reasons: One starts with a C and another starts with a K," Andrea answered him. When he didn't answer, she blinked. "Don't tell me you have no clue with what I'm talking about."

"Other then a good education, I honestly can't think of anything," Kurama answered her. Although it was a puzzle, this one was baffling even him.

Her head still on his shoulder, Andrea looked up at him. "Okay, I'll give you a hint... think of one person I'd want to see again."

This started the guessing game. "Yusuke?" Kurama asked her.

Andrea felt like laughing. "That knucklehead?" she asked him. "No, keep guessing."

"Kuwabara?"

"If you say 'Koenma,' I might have to hit you."

His choices were narrowing. "Hiei?"

Shaking her head, Andrea tapped Kurama on the chin. "Nope."

Kurama shrugged his shoulders. "Then I suppose I've ran out of options."

Andrea sighed. This is gonna take some work, she thought to herself. Aloud, she answered, "It's you, silly."

(End Flashback)

The tears that had started to form in Andrea's eyes now slid down her face. But in order for her to understand it, she had to first let it out. "I just said I loved Shuichi Minamino," she said after a prolonged silence.

Youko felt like celebrating, but the pain in her voice wasn't anything to be happy about. "You said it," he replied. "And I know you mean it."

"But I can't tell him..." Andrea stopped as she lowered her head; letting some more of the tears fall. "I can't hurt him..." She finished in defeat. With everything that had happened, from the Dark Tournament to now, she had put on a simple rose-colored glasses /4/ façade, but unfortunately for her, it just came crashing down.

Youko's fox ears twitched at how silent Andrea was once again. "Do you wish to continue to hurt him?"

"I don't want to, but every time I try to tell him, something happens," she answered, continuing her gaze at the floor. "I mean, during the Dark Tournament, half of the group, and while I was away, the other tournament. Then there was the rematch with Karasu." She sniffled. "So, now, it's Jason and him trying to kill me… again. I can't put Kurama through that much pain again."

"Love without pain is no love at all. But love with too much pain is a heartbreak," Youko replied. As Andrea continued to look at the ground, he stood up. "I am not telling which why to choose. You can go through that door and never come back, or you can come with me and see him again. Which shall you choose? It is your decision alone."

Andrea stood to her feet and looked at the door for a few seconds. Something inside her snapped. She never gave up on anything before, and this was going to be the last time she ever felt that way. "I won't hurt Kurama like that. He'll think I'm giving up," she answered and turned to face Youko.

Youko held out his clawed hand to her. "Will you came back with me now?" he asked and smiled softly when Andrea sniffled, grabbed his hand and nodded.

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Author's Notes:

/1/ Um, I'm not going to explain this until you see "Poltergeist Report."

/2/ "You can't pass go and collect that $200." That's from "Monopoly." Courtesy of Parker Brothers.

/3/ From "Phantom of the Opera." Kudos to Kori for that reference.

/4/ "Rose-Colored Glasses" was a song by a singer named John Conlee. To anyone who doesn't know him, he was a mortician-turned-singer. Spooky. Here's the chorus of the song: "But these rose-colored glasses that I looking through show only the beauty, cause they hide all the truth."

Cece: Even with a cold, I still finished it! Whoo hoo!

Kurama: And with a cold, you're going back to bed, missy.

Cece: Heh heh… well, review here. (snuggles back in bed and waves)