Stand Still - Chapter Four: If you Love Something, Give it Away
Summary: Luke and Lorelai broke up after her parents wedding, then she left Stars Hollow when Mike Armstrong offered her that job. But now shes back in town, 5 years later, to give Luke something, only to find that he is a very changed man and there's something he isn't telling her. What's he hiding and what will she do when she finds out?
Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls or any of it's characters. I only write this for fun and don't make any money off of it or anything like that.
Rating: pg13 just to be safe
A/N:
Franala: I know about the spacing, when I look at the preview before I post the spacing is fine, but then I post it, somehow some of the words go together. I have no idea how, but I'm trying to work on it. You'll find out what happened to the chuppah in a much later chapter, but don't worry, you will find out. I believe you will find out in chapter nine or eight. I've written up to nine but I forget which one it is, lol. Also you'll find out who is living in Lorelai's house in the chapter after this one. I'm glad you liked this, but here's the new chapter so read and review!
JoEySaNgEl1534: Kirk and LuLu are still engaged. Thx for the review! Here's my new update so R&R!
GGFAN6: You'll find out who is living in Lorelai's house in the chapter after next, so keep reading! The first part of the chapter is Luke and Lorelai's conversation about the ring so, enjoy! Glad you liked my Kirk conversation, and you will get a Luke and Lorelai fight in a way way later chapter, and also there are a few conversations between Lorelai and Rebecca were the words aren't so nice...So anyway R&R!
The27thGilmore: You'll find out what has happened with the chuppah in chapter eight or nine, I've written up to chapter ten and I can't remember which chapter everything about the chuppah is revealed, but you'll have to wait a little while before you find out. I'm glad you liked my Kirk conversation. Here's another chapter so R&R!
orangesherbert7: Haha I'm glad my story brightened your day, that's a really great compliment and I appreciate it sooo much. You won't find out about the chuppah until chapter eight or nine, I forget which one I wrote about it in...So it will be a little while before you find out. About the Lorelai Box, well...I can't tell you so you'll just have to wait...You'll find out about Lorelai's house in the chapter after next. The first part of this chapter is Lorelai asking Luke about the ring so enjoy! I hope you like this, read it and tell me what you think!
Annick: wow thats an amazing compliment, thank you soo much! This story will be pretty long...As much as you don't want to stop reading it, I don't want to stop writing it, so I'm trying to make it a pretty long story. I hope you enjoy this chapter, read it and tell me what you think!
jennalynn: Thank you so much! I hope I didn't take too long to update, but please read and review, I'd love to know what you think!
nicole: The first part of this chapter is the conversation between Lorelai and Luke when they talk about his mother's ring soo enjoy! You'll find out what Lorelai's going to do in a later chapter. Read it and tell me what you think, I'd love to know!
snowlight24: Hah I'll try not to make it too mushy? How am I doing so far? Is it too mushy? Of course, drama never hurt anyone, if there wasn't any the world would be boring! Hope you enjoy this new chapter, read and tell me what you think.
Nicole: Hope you didn't have to wait too long, R&R!
screaming truth: thank you! Here's my new chapter soo read it and tell me what you think!
tom: Thank you so much for the wonderful review. You'll find out some of the answers soon, but some you will have to wait awhile for. I'm glad your enjoying this story. The first part of the chapter is about Luke's mother's ring so go ahead and read it! and please, tell me what you think!
Geneva: You'll just have to wait and see...Thanx for the review! R&R!
BluJPlover: Thanks! Hope you didn't have to wait too long, I think I posted two days ago so that's pretty good! I have most of the story written anyway, I just post each chapter when I have the chance, so the chapters should come prettty quickly. Enjoy! Tell me what you think!
Shawnee89: Thank you!
A/N: Also incase anyone cares I started another GG story...Don't worry this will get finished, I'm practically done writing it anyway, I just have to post the rest of the chapters. Anyway,
the story is called Diary, it takes place in Season 4 right after Jason and Lorelai break up. I just posted the first chapter last night so check it out!
On with the story,
Lorelai came downstairsto the diner at about 7:45.
"Hey, I didn't expect you up for another couple of hours." Luke said as he poured her coffee.
"Yeah, well... I've changed, too." She told him.
He didn't know what to say to that so he waited for her to speak again.
"Shouldn't you be getting ready for your party?" She said a little more sarcastic than she had intended. "This party tonight, it is your engagement party isn't it?" She asked him. She hoped she was wrong, but what else could it be? She saw the flyers, she wanted to ignore them, but they were there. There weren't as many as she thought there would be considering how Taylor usually posts them all over the town, but they were there. She never took a good look at them, but she was almost sure that it said something about Luke and... her on them.
He nodded. "That's Rebecca's thing. Her and Lulu are setting it up."
"She's friends with Lulu? Do you double date with Kirk?" She joked. But she could see he wasn't laughing and changed the subject. "Why aren't Miss Pattie and Taylor doing it? They usually do these type of things."
"Umm...well...they just didn't." He said nervously. He didn't want to mention it. He knew exactly why they weren't throwing them the party. They had confronted him about it many times. But he didn't want to tell her.
She knew he was hiding something again. He was never a good liar.
"Hey, I have a question," she said as she sat at the counter in front of him, like she used to. She looked into his eyes, she had a very serious expression on her face. He knew this couldn't be good.
"Yeah?"
She waited for a few seconds before saying anything, trying to figure out what he was thinking, but of course she couldn't. She sighed, "Is Rebecca wearing your mother's ring?" She had to know.
He froze. He looked a little confused, but also something else, she didn't know what it was, scared maybe?
"W-What?" He trembled, he was nervous and he wasn't looking directly at her. Maybe that was no? Or maybe it was yes?
"Did you give her your mother's ring?" She repeated calmly.
"What makes you think my mother had a ring?" He realized how weird that sounded, "I mean...that she gave me her ring..." He said, still nervous, and still not looking at her.
"A little birdie told me," she said, looking at him so seriously, it made him even more nervous. She just had to know. She wasn't sure what it would mean either way, but she still hoped that she wasn't wearing his mother's ring, the one was supposed to be hers.
"Kirk." He stated it with a little bit of anger, annoyance and maybe a little bit embarrasment. He remembered that night all too well. It was the first snow of the season, it was the day that he hoped to propose to Lorelai. He always knew he would propose to her on the first snow of the season because she loved the snow and he knew it would be special. He had been watching the snow all day, thinking about her. He was sad, and he missed her, and well...Kirk was there...So he spilled his heart out to him. He told him everything. He knew it was a mistake, but he didn't think that Lorelai come back and find out.
"It doesn't matter... is she? Is that ring on her finger your mothers?" She was still so serious, her eyes fixed on him. He was now looking at her, right into her eyes. He wanted to look away, but he couldn't.
He was silent for what seemed like forever.
"No." He said
She nodded,stood up, smiled slighty and then turned and walked out the door. He might have been in shock, but he didn't move for a while. He just stared at the door she had just walken out of. He knew this couldn't be good...
"Hey Pattie," Lorelai said as she passed Miss Pattie later that afternoon. She had been doing a lot of errands, she had a plan...
"Hi sweetie." Pattie smiled. Lorelai sat beside her.
"Are you going to the party tonight?"
"Of course not, you're not, are you?" Pattie said.
"Why wouldn't I?"
"Lorelai, darling, you can't go."
"Why aren't you going?" Lorelai asked. Pattie always went to town functions, always. Why wouldn't she go to this one?
"The only people that are going are a lot of Rebecca's friends, and some people around the town that don't..." She paused as if she was afriad to go on.
"Don't what?" She was curious.
"Well, the ones that don't know...or care." Pattie said.
"What?" She was confused. Everything had been so confusing in the past couple days.
"Lorelai! You and Luke!" Miss Pattie said as if it was so obvious.
"What about us?" Lorelai played dumb, she knew it and Miss Pattie knew it. Lorelai knew what she meant, she knew exactly what she was talking about, but they both played along.
"You belong together. No one likes this Rebecca. Sure, she is the sweetest little thing, and so pretty, nice, too...But she's no Lorelai. She's not for Luke. You're the only one for him."
Lorelai smiled. She liked this. She liked that the town was rooting for her. She liked that they were thinking the same thing she was. Of course, it wouldn't make a difference, not to Luke, anyway. What did he care who the town thought was best for him? But she still liked that the town was boycotting the party, just for her. She felt a little bit guilty about feeling this way, but it was Luke. They did belong together. She knew it. Everyone knew it. Everyone, except for him.
Boy, how things had changed. She used to be the clueless one. Everyone used to tell her how he loved her, how they would be perfect together. She ignored it and denied it. She was so clueless. And now, probably 10 years later, everything had totally changed. It was like the world had been turned upside down. She saw it now, just how much everything changed. The town had changed, her and Luke had changed, life had changed. She didn't want to admit it before, that things were changing... But now, how could she pretend that everything was the same when it was so obviously different?
But she could set it straight, or atleast attempt to. She hada plan, and she had a good feeling that it might just work.
"You OK, honey?" Rebecca said sweetly. She was always so sweet, no one understood how she could be with a guy like Luke, who had only shown his sweet side to Lorelai and Rory.
"Yeah." He jumped when she touched him. He was in deep thought. He couldn't stop thinking about his conversation with Lorelai that morning. He knew what she was going to think. But it wasn't the truth...he didn't think. He looked around for her, but she wasn't anywhere.
He remembered Lorelai's and Max's engagement party and how hard it was for him to see them together. Maybe that's why she didn't come, it was too hard.
Wow. So much had changed in these past 10 years. It used to be him, wanting her but having to sit and watch her be with other people. And now it was her that was sitting back and watching him get married. It was so weird to think about. This is what he had wanted, it's what he never thought would happen. Lorelai wanting to be with him, really wanting to be with him, maybe forever. He didn't believe it would happen, he didn't think he was that lucky...to have her, forever. That was one of the reasons he broke up with her, because he was afraid of getting hurt later on. After he saw Christopher at her parents wedding, and listened to everything he had said to her. He snapped, and he got scared. He wasn't good at allowing himelf to be put in a position to get hurt, that was always something they had in common. So he broke it off, before he got his heart broken. And that didn't work out how he planned, he had spent over a year thinking about her. Probably longer than that, he didn't really ever stop thinking about her.
Luke froze. He had to stop. He was getting married. In less than three weeks, he would be married. He had to get over all of this. He's only thinking all of this because she's back in town, and they had lots of good memories, and a crazy history. That's all there is, it's just memories. He loved the memories, not Lorelai. He was going to marry Rebecca.
She stood, far away, away from the music, the lights, the dancing. She watched them for hours. All day she had been excited about her idea, her "plan," but when she saw the party, she froze. A slight depression came over her as she saw everyone out there having a good time.
She thought about her engagement party that the town had thrown for her when she was getting married to Max. She wondered if this is what Luke did, if this is what he felt when he watched her engagement party.
He looked happy, but he also looked as if he was waiting for something, looking for something, missing something. She wondered if he was looking for her.
But she didn't want to go in there. She wasn't in the mood to party and congradulate two people on an engagement that she didn't want to happen.
She had to stop watching, so she took a walk. A walk around the town. As she did so many memories came back to her. She had missed this place more than she knew.
She went by the Inn. The Inn that she didn't want to stay at. But for some reason, tonight, when she saw it, she saw it as how it used to be.
You're the most confident person I know. Obnoxiously so. You're good at what you do and you know it."
"I'm good at doing what I have to do. When I had to get a job, I got it. When I had to find a house for us and a life for us, I got it. When I had to get Rory into Chilton, I did it. But I don't have to leave the Independence Inn. I don't have to go into business for myself."
She smiled as she remembered how nervous she was about opening her own Inn. And look how things turned out...She didn't have the Inn for long, but she loved it. Well, like they say, if you love something, give it away.
She just wished she hadn't.
She walked up to the porch and peaked through the window. Then, she stood where they had been standing all those years ago, when they first kissed.
She smiled as she remembered how nervous the two of them were.
"I thought we were on track, and now you're standing there looking at me like I'm crazy."
"I'm not looking at you like your crazy!"
"You know the last time I bought flowers for someone? Never! That's when! Very easy stat to remember."
"I loved the flowers!"
"And then when I walked you home after the wedding, there was a moment. I thought there was a moment."
"There was! There was a moment."
He looked at her and got closer.
"What are you doing?"
"Would you just stand still?"
They kissed then, she moved away, but then came closer.
"What are you doing?"
"Would you just stand still?"
She couldn't help but smile when she thought about how nervous she was, but how amazing the kiss was. She stood at the Dragonfly for a few more minutes, but then she moved on.
She walked down the street, snow was still on the ground. As she walked down the streets she remembered their first date.
Hey, do you remember the first time we met?
What?
I'm just trying to remember the first time we met. It must have been at Luke's, right?
It was at Luke's, it was at lunch, it was a very busy day, the place was packed, and this person...
Ooh, is it me? Is it me?
This person comes tearing into the place in a caffeine frenzy.
Ooh, it's me.
I was with a customer. She interrupts me, wild-eyed, begging for coffee, so I tell her to wait her turn. Then she starts following me around, talking a mile a minute, saying God knows what. So finally I turn to her, and I tell her she's being annoying - sit down, shut up, I'll get to her when I get to her.
Y'know, I bet she took that very well, 'cause she sounds just delightful.
She asked me what my birthday was. I wouldn't tell her. She wouldn't stop talking. I gave in. I told her my birthday. Then she opened up the newspaper to the horoscope page, wrote something down, tore it out, handed it to me.
God, seriously. You wrote the menu, didn't you?
So I'm looking at this piece of paper in my hand, and under Scorpio, she had written 'You will meet an annoying woman today. Give her coffee and she'll go away.' I gave her coffee.
But she didn't go away.
She told me to hold on to that horoscope, put it in my wallet, and carry it around with me
He opened his wallet and took out a small piece of paper
one day it would bring me luck.
Well, man, I will say anything for a cup of coffee
Then he handed me the paper, and I read it.
Um... I can't believe you kept this. You kept this in your wallet? ...You kept this in your wallet.
Eight years.
Eight years.
She wondered if it was still in his wallet.
She didn't want to think about it, she just wanted to be happy. Even if she was just living in the past.
Then she stopped, realizing where she had found herself. She looked up to see her home, her old home that is. But it would always be her first house. Sure, she grew up at the Independence Inn, in the potting shed, but this was her first real house. The first house that she bought and and took care of all by herself. It looked exactly the same, as if she still lived there. But there was one thing missing, her chuppah. The yard looked empty without it. It had been there the last three years she had lived there. She remembered thinking how weird it looked without the chuppah the day she left Stars Hollow.
She wondered who lived there now, if she would like them, and if they'd like her. She wondered what it looked like inside. She sat down on the lawn and stared at her house. She just stared, not even thinking about anything in perticular, just thinking...and sitting. She glanced over and saw a For Sale sign that stood near the mail box. She hadn't noticed it before. She stared at it for awhile. Her house was going up for sale, maybe it was a sign. Maybe it was a sign that she should stay...and buy her old house back.
After a while, she got up and walked back to Luke's apartment. She watched the party through the window for a few minutes, and then she went to bed.
Atleast she still had her plan. She only hoped it would go the way she imagined.
There are many paths in life. There's the "Hey, you're cute, sure, I'll marry you after graduation and med school" and the "Can you drive Susie to soccer today, 'cause I've got a pediure?" path. And then there's my path, where I found myself 16 and pregnant and I realized "I have to get a job, I have to raise a kid and being me, I have to do it all by myself." Not easy. But the thing with my path was, when I reached the end, I turned around and realized I'd ended up someplace really good.
Do you guys remember that? Lorelai used to say it during the theme song, I think they only did that in the first season, but I had totally forgotton about it until now...Just thought I'd share.
Anyways, what did you guys think about this chapter? I changed it around a lot, I was originally going to have Lorelai reveal her "plan" in this chapter, but I changed my mind. I think it would be way way too soon and I think it would rush the story too much.
So, I guess for now, your just going to have to guess what Lorelai is planning. Small hint in the chapter, anyone catch it?
As always ideas/suggestions/comments wanted. Good or Bad!
Next chapter: Babette and Lorelai's talk leaves Lorelai speechless. Luke looks through his Lorelai Box again and Lorelai has a run in with Rebecca at Doose's.