~Be sure to check out my website, REvolution! (at ) for information about an illustration contest for my stories 'Legolas and the Really Messed-Up Fanfic!' and 'The Fellowship of the Fanfic Writers!' *by the way, that's no typo up there, that's how you spell my site's name * ~

The Fellowship of the Fanfic Writers!

by Odeena Skywalker (alias Anne Shard)

Interlude: Party time! (part one)

[ Fade in... ]

[ Welcome to the Green Dragon! As you may have realized already, I am the narrator of this interlude. My name is William Stuart the Fifth, but you can just call me Will. Or Bill. Or even Billy, if it strikes your fancy. ]

[ The party hasn't started yet, but there is plenty of activity around the Green Dragon. Tents and trailers are set up all around it, and fans, characters and paparazzi are swarming everywhere. Merry, Pippin, Frodo, Sam and ApocalypticPyro - who is the guest of honor of the evening - are sitting around a bonfire and roasting marshmallows, Boromir and Faramir are playing 'Rock, paper, scissors', Arwen is posing for a group of photographers, Eowyn and Elrohir are having a very animated conversation, chuckling on occasion, and the list could go on and on until the dawn of the next age, when... sorry, I got a little carried away there. ]

[ Suddenly, Saruman's face appears in the sky. ]

Saruman: May I have your attention, please? May I have your attention, please?

Boromir: *giggles* Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?

Faramir: *cracks up*

Saruman: ...thank you. I have a few announcements to make.

Pippin: *whispering to Merry* I kinda like Saruman 'classic', but a Saruman that's as big as half the sky is simply an insult to... err... to... well, you get the point, right?

Saruman: Fool of a Took! Don't think I didn't hear that!

Pippin: Whoops...

Gandalf: Hey! That was my line! ...or, the first part, anyway...

Saruman: So? I don't see your name on it!

Gandalf: ...actually, it would be a physical impossibility to 'see' anything on a spoken line, as it is not material. Unless you're talking somewhere really cold, and then you could see vapor coming out of your mouth... although that's not actually 'seeing' the line...

Saruman: What?

Gandalf: What what?

Saruman: I don't get it!

Gandalf: I don't get it, either!

Aragorn: HEY! Saruman, are you going to announce whatever you're supposed to announce this century?

Kekelina: *giggles* You tell them, Elessar.

Aragorn: *surprised smile* You know, I love it when people call me Elessar.

Kekelina: *smiles* Really...?

Boromir: *shouting* Hey, get a room, you two!

Saruman: As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, the party will start a little later than planned, due to some... technical difficulties... Meanwhile, our lovely assistants from Lothlorien will give refreshments around.

Eowyn: But we've been waiting here for hours!

ApocalypticPyro: Days!

Eowyn: ...right! For days!

Saruman: ...whoops, look at the time, got to go! *disappears*

Boromir: *mutters* Technical difficulties, huh? He should've said, 'kitchen difficulties'. Or even better, 'kitchen wars'...

Crystalline: Hi cutie!

Boromir: ...hello? Do I know you?

Crystalline: Well, you do now! Name's Crystalline, by the way.

Boromir: Enchanted. I'm--

Faramir: Boromir! There you w--oh, hi, sorry to interrupt you two, but--

Crystalline: Oh, it's no problem at all! I'm Crystalline.

Faramir: Well, nice to meet you...

Linwe: There you were! My friend and I have been looking all over for you! *giggles* You know, you're even prettier than you look on TV. I'm Linwe.

Filia Regalis: And I'm Filia Regalis. I'm your biggest fan!

Linwe: No, I'm your biggest fan!

Filia Regalis: *glares* No, I'm--

Boromir: Girls, girls! There's plenty of Faramir for everyone! You're both his biggest fans, how about that?

Linwe & Filia Regalis: OK.

Crystalline: Boromir, you were saying something about kitchen wars...?

Boromir: Well, yeah. You see, Legolas is doing the cooking, Odeena is helping him, Haldir has a noble heart and decided to give them a hand, and Gollum somehow got stuck with them.

Crystalline: Wow...

Boromir: But enough about them. Let's talk about things that really matter. So, tell me more about you.

Crystalline: *giggles* OK. Poor Odeena though...

Boromir: Oh, don't worry. I'm sure she's doing just fine.

[ Or not... ]

Legolas: Odeena, here it says a pince of spicy sauce, not an ounce!

Odeena: *innocently* ...oops.

Legolas: Never mind, we'll just give it to Sam and Pippin. They'll never now.

Odeena: What are we supposed to be cooking again?

Legolas: Chin-tzu-chai-nikki-poo.

Odeena: Right. Can you say that again, this time in English?

Legolas: Snake heard sauce with turtle tail and bat wings.

Odeena: ...what?

Legolas: Just kidding. It's some sort of Chinese salad.

Odeena: OK.

Legolas: Haldir, how are those oysters coming?

Haldir: What oisters?

Legolas: The ones you were supposed to cook?

Haldir: What, those weren't pebbles_

Legolas: Pebbles?!

Haldir: ...oops?

Legolas: *slaps his forehead* This is not happening...

Gollum: We founds it! We founds it! We founds the Precious!

Odeena: Hey! That's my engagement ring, give it back!

Legolas: Engagement ring...?

Haldir: Don't you think that you're too young for that?

Odeena: Actually, it's just some stupid joke me and Paul came up with when we were still together, it's no biggie. Come to think it, Gollum, you can keep it.

Haldir: Ever notice how the tips of Legolas' ears turn red whenever you speak of Paul?

Legolas: That's not true!

Haldir: Come on, Legolas, there's no shame in it! Admit it! You're jealous!

Legolas: Am not!

Haldir: Are too!

Odeena: ...umm, boys? As much as I'd like to see you two fight, save it for my birthday, we've got cooking to do.

Legolas: Right. Sorry.

Haldir: Sorry, too.

Legolas: But I am not jealous!

[ To be continued... ]

___________

Author's Note: First of all, I'd like to apologize again for missing to answer to several reviews for the previous chapter. I've added the other review responses to it now, so I hope nobody's mad at me... are you? *looks around with puppy-dog eyes* ...and now - here it is, people! The Green Dragon Party interlude! Well, the first part, anyway. Originally I was going to write it in just one chapter, but it turned out much longer than expected! Part two is going to be even better than part one! Stay tuned! And thanks for reviewing go to:

ApocalypticPyro: Sorry, sorry, sorry! Please don't cry... man, I feel so bad... *goes to do her little cousin's math homework as punishment for being so ignorant*

Filia Regalis: Well, Faramir just got out of the closet. Apart from a little appearance problem, he's OK - but he's in desperate need of a hair stylist, and soon ^_^

Lobo Diablo Lone Wolf: Wow, I didn't know I have the ability to make people go hysterical... maybe I should consider taking up a career as a politician, how about that? *giggles* j/k. Anyway, for a little spoiler, Pippin's story is going to be about mushrooms, and Merry's about... no, wait, I don't want to give everything away just yet! Stay tuned and you'll find out! ^_^

Crystalline4: You know, your review got me thinking... I like Eowyn because she looks great and she kicks @$$, too. And most importantly because Faramir likes her, and I could never dislike something that Faramir likes.

Kekelina: Thank you, thank you, I feel honored by your praise! ^_^ To be honest, my ideas come in all sorts of different situations... usually in the morning, when I drink my first coffee of the three or four I drink a day, or when I'm walking in the street and I'm lost in thoughts... but I can't tell for sure.

Voldie On Varsity Track: Yep, that scene in RotK (the book, I mean) is one of my faves, too. And Faramir definitely is a sexy beast! ^_^ But I still like Boromir best... Okay, this gives me an idea: in your reviews for your next chapter, also say which one you like best - Faramir or Boromir! I'm really curious... (By the way, why are you afraid of Galadriel? And what on Middle-Earth is a butler doing in your pants of all things...? O_o)

lds_sunshinegrl: Thank you! I never forget to smile! ^_^ (Actually, some people say I smile too much...) By the way, what does TTFN mean? I'm having trouble with this kind of abbreviations... the last one I learned was ROFLMAOKAS (witch means Rolling on the floor laughing my ass off kicking and screaming), and I learned it from... *thinks* Stewardess of Gondor, I think. So what does this one mean...?