TITLE: Catch Me When I Fall
RATING: PG
SUMMARY: Shannon just wants someone to catch her.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the characters from Lost and am not making a profit. If they were mine, then there would be more Shayid moments. Song lyrics belong to Ashlee Simpson, song is Catch me When I Fall.

Who will be the one to save me from myself
Who will be the one who's there
And not ashamed to see me crawl
Who's gonna catch me when I fall

Is Anybody Out There?

Shannon was alone. It was how it always was and always would be. People always surrounded her, but never saw her, never knew her. Even now on a deserted island. Surrounded by other survivors, she was still all alone. She ached to call to them. Ached to find someone to share her burdens with. But no one would understand, no one would believe her. It was the beautiful girl curse, as she called it. People were there to use her, but when she needed them they vanished. Boone was gone, Sayid, her first friend was gone. She was always alone.

Seems Like People Care

What annoyed Shannon was when people pretended to care. They'd sit down next to her and ask her how she was doing. Was she sleeping, eating? Did the nightmares end? She'd smile and lie. They always believed her. Maybe she'd missed her calling as an actress. Couldn't they see that the smile stopped at her mouth? That it never reached her eyes? The only one who would see was gone. She was tired of fake sympathy. It wasn't what she needed. She just wanted someone to stop the descent into darkness. Someone to catch her before it was too late.

Empty Everywhere

Even worse was the emptiness. She was used to being alone even when surrounded by people. That wasn't new. The fact that everyone thought she was crazy and purposely stayed away from her, that was new. She wasn't crazy. At least she didn't think she was. Did crazy people know they were going crazy? Where was Sayid? He'd help her figure it out. Or would he just lie to her like before? Tell her that everyone would be okay even though it was so far from okay. The guys on the raft were dead. She'd seen Walt. She was empty.

Nowhere to Go

Shannon was going stir crazy. She'd been in the caves too long. But she didn't know where else to go. She wouldn't go further into the jungle and risk seeing Walt again. Wouldn't go to the beach, because that involved walking through the jungle. If Sayid would get back, then maybe she would have a place to go. She was stalled. She couldn't move, couldn't stop the thoughts that ran through her mind. She was stuck on the island and no one believed her when she said rescue wasn't coming. So many areas to explore. She was stuck going nowhere.

It May Seem I have Everything

Shannon was used to life as a living Barbie. Her entire life, everyone had been jealous of her. Now everyone seemed to pity her. It was no longer jealousy and was not something she was used to. She still had all her clothing. Still looked the best on the island, but what else did she have? Her brother was dead. Her boyfriend hadn't returned. She was seeing dead people. Maybe on the off chance that rescue did come, she'd make a Barbie doll like that. "Lost It All Barbie." It would be a big seller, she thought rolling her eyes.

Loneliness is A Part of Me

Before when she was alone, she was able to lie to herself. Make herself believe that her feelings were abnormal. She had friends. Really she did. But now she realized that the loneliness that had settled into her stomach was always there. She'd just forgotten because Sayid had been spending time with her. He erased an ache that she had grown so used to. How sad that her greatest friend had been loneliness. She wanted her new friend to come back. Wanted her boyfriend to return safely. She needed to get away from the caves. These thoughts were too much.

Catch Me When I Fall

Shannon walked quickly away, her heart racing. She was risking another Walt sighting. But she needed to stop the walls from closing in. The whispers around her grew louder and louder. She covered her ears resisting the urge to scream at them to shut up. It had to be the wind. At least that's what Sayid would say. She froze. Did she hear him now? She moved quicker. Called out his name. Stumbled over a fallen branch. Felt strong arms grab her before she fell. She looked up. Her Sayid. She should have known she could always count on him.