Yes, boys and girls, there be more. What's that? Phooey! Well, beans to you! You smelly bastards, you'll read it and like it, goshdarnit!

Oh yeah, I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!

Lockdown

12:15pm

"Oh come on!"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Pretty please with a cherry on top?"

A pregnant pause.

"No."

"Don't be such an ass! I just wanna look around! I swear I won't touch anything!"

"No, Jou. I've got a meeting with the board after lunch and I've got to prepare. I don't have the time to give you the grand tour!"

"It's not a tour, I just wanna see the vault!"

"Then I'll get you a picture if it'll shut you up."

"Oh, ha ha. You're always so funny, aren't you? Come on, it won't take more than twenty minutes and you know it. It's also the only way to shut me up! I'll just keep nagging you till you give in sooner or later. Better sooner, right?"

Seto Kaiba scowled. Jou had an irrefutable point.

"Right," he said somewhat grumpily. "You're worse than Mokuba sometimes."

Jou gave a mock bow and smiled smugly.

They were in Seto's gigantic office at the very top of the KaibaCorp building. Katsuya Jounouchi was perched on the edge of Seto's desk, while the CEO was sitting in his large high-backed black leather chair, looking like a king. Or maybe like more like a god, Jou thought, as the light streamed in from the glass wall behind them, illuminating Seto in a decidedly god-like way.

Jou had no problems imagining Seto as such – a vengeful god, omnipotent and angry; and prone to radiating icy mist across the unsuspecting countryside just because he could. He took a good look at Seto again, and decided that right now, he looked more like an annoyed god. He smiled a little. This day was going better than he thought it would have.

"Let's go! It won't take us long, I promise!"

Seto sighed, obviously beaten, and buzzed his secretary.

"Hold all my calls and push my appointments back half an hour. I'll be in the vault."

He spat the last word out like it was venom, but Jou knew he was just acting cranky out of habit. Seto didn't even wait for his secretary (her name was Noriko – Jou liked her a lot) to answer him and he stalked off to his private elevator at the front of the room in a hurricane of trench coat and Jou's favourite cologne. Jou followed at a more sedate pace and smiled sweetly at a glaring Seto as he held the door open for him.

"Going down," Seto said and jabbed at a button marked B5. Jou immediately felt the lurch in his stomach and knew they were hurtling toward the ground at an amazing speed. They stood in silence for a moment, and Jou stealthily glanced in Seto's direction. Seto caught his eye and shook his head.

"If I had known today was bring-your-boyfriend-to-work day, I would have left you tied to the bed this morning."

"You are such a fucking kink," Jou replied. This (along with numerous other disturbing quirks), however, was something Jou had definitely grown to love. He smirked. "I'll tell you what – if you're nice to me today, when we get home I'll make sure to return the favour."

It was Seto's turn to smirk, and Jou let him. This was his day, and he was definitely getting his way.

"Besides, it's not take-your-boyfriend-to-work day. It's my birthday!"

"And you wanted to spend it doing this?" Seto shook his head again. "I'll have you know you could have done anything today. I might even have been persuaded to take the day off."

"Now he tells me." Jou sniffed a little. "I don't know. This place is a really big part of your life. I guess I just wanted to see what the fuss was about." He shrugged a little, and Seto regarded him calmly. But it was a tender calm, and Jou endured it stoically.

"What's on all these other underground floors?" he asked to break the sudden silence. Jou watched the bright display change rapidly – B1, B2, B3.

"This is where we do most of our testing," Seto said. He didn't feel like giving a more in depth explanation, and he was sure Jou wasn't really that interested anyways.

"Okay," Jou said slowly, and the elevator stopped before Jou had time to ask just what the hell kind of game would need underground testing. He soon forgot about that altogether when the door slid open and he looked outside.

They walked into the wide hallway that led to the vault, and stopped at the largest and most formidable pair of steel doors Jou had ever seen in his life. Seto was already punching in his password by the time Jou caught himself.

"Motherfu…what the hell is in there?" he asked, slightly in awe, slightly scared; unable to take his eyes off the doors. He even jumped a little when a creepy voice informed them that access was granted, and then promptly hoped Seto didn't see.

Seto smiled eerily as the thick metal bars hinging the doors together slid backward, and the doors swung forward loudly. Well, the doors themselves moved noiselessly, like metal ghosts, but there was a horrible hissing sound that accompanied it, and a slight rush of air blew past him. The interior of the room was still dark, and Jou suddenly felt as though he were going into dangerous territory. He shivered a little; it was freezing in there.

"Come on, let's make this quick," Seto said, ushering him inside. The doors had only opened up a couple of feet, and Seto pushed Jou through first. With every step they took, the automated lights clicked on, gradually illuminating the entire room. The fluorescent lights were white-bright, and even the floor had a metallic sort of shine to it. The room itself was cavernous, and the walls were lined with solid steel, larger than average safety deposit boxes with keypads on them. They were each numbered, and some had little blue lights above them.

"Wow," Jou said, standing in the centre of the room and spinning slowly. "Does every one of these have something in them?"

"No, only the ones with blue lights," Seto answered, following Jou's eyes around the vault. It was rather impressive, if he did say so himself. He could understand Jou's amazement – this place looked every bit as grand and imposing as he meant it to look. He watched Jou wander up to one of the small safes and touch it, and thought that Jou looked like a kid in a candy store – excited and a little awed, wanting to touch everything but knowing he had to behave. Seto wondered if ten minutes was enough time for Jou to have had enough fun.

"And do they all have different passwords?" Jou asked, turning back to look at Seto.

Seto hesitated a little before answering, "A few of them have special passwords. The rest have a standard password. Of course, only Mokuba and I know them all."

"Of course," Jou said, turning back to the wall of safes in front of him. "This place is like a goddamned prison."

"Well, that's sort of the point, Katsuya. Nothing can get in, and more importantly, nothing gets out without the proper authorisation. It's impenetrable."

"Jeez. Hey, how come they don't go in order?" Jou asked, looking at all the little winking blue lights.

Seto knew what he meant. He had an elaborate system set up for the vault, and he had wondered if Jou would notice. He felt oddly pleased that he had, and so he began to explain the organisational scheme. Safety deposit boxes 1 through 100 were reserved for important documents; boxes 101 through 200 were reserved for prototypes, most of them top secret; boxes 201 through 300 were reserved for various personal effects and so on and so forth. He had divided all one thousand boxes into specialised sections, and he turned around the room as he counted them all off for Jou.

12:30pm

As soon as Seto had turned his back, Jou dropped his fake interested smile and quietly edged away from him. He hated to get Seto started, but he never really knew what would do it. He was glad Mokuba had taught him the smile and run trick, and he let Seto talk to himself for a few minutes as he wandered the rest of the room. He stopped at one of the huge metal doors that they had just come through, noticing that there was a different sort of keypad on it, with a large red button in the middle. It was the kind of button that Jou knew he shouldn't touch, and so he called out to Seto.

"Hey, what does this button do?"

Seto whirled around to see Jou pointing at the red button, and appeared so quickly at Jou's side he thought he'd teleported.

"Don't touch that button, Jou!" Seto said. He nearly breathed a sigh of relief when Jou held up both his hands in mock surrender. He almost shook his head again. He loved Jou more than he ever thought he could, but he really was a clumsy oaf. He attracted disaster to him quicker than a large hole in a small boat in the middle of the widest sea.

"I was just asking what it does," Jou said, looking a little miffed.

"Right. It's an auto-locking mechanism. It locks the vault from the inside," Seto explained.

"Why the hell would you want to lock the vault from inside?" Jou asked, quite intelligently too, Seto thought.

"I always thought it was rather pointless too. Apparently the idea is that a thief might actually lock himself in here."

"Wait a minute, lemme get this straight. Some crook is gonna be smart enough to make it past all your security systems, get into the impenetrable vault, and then be stupid enough lock himself in here? That's the dumbest thing I ever heard. Who's gonna be dumb enough to lock themselves in here?"

As he said this, Jou reached his arm out, and Seto would forever swear that it was on pure instinct that he lunged at Jou's outstretched arm shouting "I said don't touch it!", causing Jou's hand to flail backwards and squarely smack the red button. They barely righted themselves as the doors clanged shut, followed by the sound of the automatic bolts locking into place. The lights flickered and dimmed, and if they strained, they could hear a shrill siren screaming above them. They slowly turned to look at each other.

"What the hell did you do that for!" Jou yelled at Seto, confident for once in his life that this certainly wasn't his fault.

"I thought you were going to press the Auto-Lock!" Seto replied heatedly, equally confident that this was all Jou's fault somehow.

"Well I wasn't! Look, whatever, just get us out of here." Jou resolved to fume in a more comfortable location, but then found the sudden silence that surrounded them odd. He looked up at Seto, who was looking back at him blankly.

"I said get us out of here," Jou repeated, hoping that Seto had just temporarily gone hard of hearing.

Seto ran his hands through his hair and sighed heavily, which Jou recognised as his ultimate stressed out gesture. He quickly switched to panic mode.

"Oh no, don't say we're stuck here!"

"We're stuck."

Stay tuned, bitches! It's a saga, a saga I tell you! Clicky clicky review plzkthxbai!11183