'What
the bloody hell is this?' yelled Fred(or George, whichever you
prefer), looking confused and appalled.
Everyone looked around,
curiously eyeing each other with interest and fear. Everyone looked
peculiar to each other at first; the Harry Potter's in robes and
caps, Lord of the Rings in capes, with swords and bows and arrows,
and all the things of that sort, and the Pirates dressed as...well,
pirates. But the most peculiar was the Hobbits.
Of course, wizards
and witches don't have a clue what Hobbits are(same with Pirates,
but they aren't included in this part). So then they wouldn't
know that Hobbits are originally supposed to be three feet tall, and
have big hairy feet. So, intentionally, Fred and George had to poke
some fun.
Fred wandered casually over to the nearest, which
lo-and-behold was Frodo, and grinned down at him. Frodo looked up
nervously, looking quickly to Sam, Merry and the Pippin, and back up
to Frodo.
'Well, little midgets have to come to... to... uh,
wherever this place is,' recovered Fred, smirking.
'I am no
middet, I am a Hobbit!' protested Frodo.
'Middet?' George
laughed, appearing behind Fred. 'It's midget, you
doorknob!'
Frodo turned red in the face and backed away. Another
Hobbit, by the name of Sam, jumped in front of Frodo, sword beared to
Fred and George. 'Don't make fun of Mr Frodo!' spat Sam, waving
his sword.
Fred backed up. 'Whoah, little one... settle done
there! We'll leave him alone. Sheesh.'
However, George did not
back up. He had spotted Gimli, sitting on a rock, long beard wrapped
around his neck to keep in warmth.
'Your another Hobbit, too, I
suppose?' asked George.
'Aye, I am no Hobbit. Pure-blooded
Dwarf.' beamed Gimli, proudly. 'Gimli, son of Gloin, I am.'
Draco
Malfoy, the little nasty rat-boy, was hiding in the crowd burst into
laughter. 'Gloin? What kind of bloody name is that? Honestly, you
people are rich!' Draco slapped his knee, laughing maniacally. A
frightened Ron sank further into the crowd.
Legolas jumped from
his spot, arrow already in his bow and ready to fire, and aimed it at
Draco's head. Draco stopped laughing immediately. Who wouldn't?
He has an arrow pointed at his head, for Pete's sake!
Draco was
terrified, but Ron was rather joyous.
'Kill him, miss!'
shouted Ron, punching the air. Legolas rounded on Ron, arrow pulled
back even tighter, and aimed it right in between his eyes. Ron
gulped.
'I am not a woman. I am Legolas.' spat Legolas, fury
dancing across his face.
'Sor-Sorry... I... well, it's just...
your hair...' Ron stammered, tears welling in his eyes. Draco was
grinning.
'Make fun of our names once more, young one, and you
will have a third eye.' Legolas warned, and loosened his arrow,
stepping back.
Aragorn stepped forward. 'I think we should
introduce ourselves, since it seems we aren't getting out of here
anytime soon.'
'How about we find out how we've gotten to
this damn place and see if they've got some rum!' piped up a man
from the last group, which was the pirates. His eyes were outlined in
dark make-up and dreads filled his hair, which hung out of a red
headband, beads and other junk. Of course, it was the
oh-so-famous-for-not-so-good-reasons Captain Jack Sparrow. Everyone
turned towards the outrageous man to look at him. He sort of swayed
on the spot and grinned at the people. He waved and Saruman snorted
in disgust.
'It's a simple thing really-' began
Dumbledore.
'-We have gotten here by-' Gandalf continued.
'-By
time-turning, or transportation into the past or future!' they both
exclaimed at the same time. The both whipped their heads to look at
each other, glaring. Everything was quiet except for Jack's
muttering as he searched the snowy terrain for rum. Dumbledore took
out his wand as Gandalf brought out his staff, both readying to
fight.
Suddenly, a man in his late 30's with a horribly done
comb-over jumped out from behind a nearby tree.
Everyone screamed
in surprise as the man smiled broadly at them. 'Welcome everybody!'
he yelled, arms wide.
'Hi!' replied a man from the pirate
group with a wooden eye. A fat man beside him elbowed him sharply in
the stomach.
'I'm Randell Crane!' said the man happily,
walking past the groups.
Hermione stepped forward. 'Mr Crane?
How'd you get us here?'
'I'm special, that's how! OK,
does everyone know where we are?'
'It seems we are on a mild
part of Cadarahas...' said Legolas wisely.
Randell was quiet for
a long time, along with everyone else except for the Lord of the
Rings group who murmured among themselves. 'Uh, close enough Mr
Pointy Eared Guy!' Legolas looked offended. 'We are actually in
Canada!'
'I've heard of Canada!' yelled Hermione.
'Typical
Mud-blood...' Draco sighed, rolling his eyes.
'Don't you
dare call her that!' roared Ron, pulling out his wand.
'You're
going to attack him with polished wood?' asked Saruman, rolling his
eyes. 'Uh-huh...'
'It is not polished wood! It's a wand!'
yelled Ron, still infuriated. 'I am a wizard-'
'You're not
a wizard!' cut in Gandalf. 'I'm a wizard!'
'Well, we are
too!' snapped Dumbledore, glaring at Gandalf.
Gandalf stuck his
tongue out at Dumbledore, and turned his back on him. Dumbledore
glared at him, shaking his fist.
'Uh-huh... Why are we here?'
asked Harry, eyeing Dumbledore and Gandalf cautiously.
'For the
Survival Challenge!' Randell cried excitedly.
'Oh, thank God
we all know what that is!' said Will sarcastically, fuming.
'You
don't need to get angry about it!' retorted Legolas.
'Who
ask you, you nancing, prissy elf?' spat Will, tapping his foot
impatiently.
Once again, Legolas had another arrow pointed for
death at someone. Randell burst into hysterias. 'Oh no, no, no! No
weapons! We'll have to take those away! Nadene! Come take the
weapons away!'
Everyone groaned as they let their precious
weapons be taken away by a tall, bulky woman with a moustache who
growled when ever someone hesitated with the weapon. Gimli was crying
as Nadene took his axe away and Jack tried to bargain his way out of
it when she came to get his sword.
'I'll give you rum! Nice,
tasty rum!' Jack pleaded.
'Give it up, Jack! You've got no
rum!' snapped Annamaria angrily, as she set down her sword.
'But
she doesn't know that...' winked Jack, pointing to Nadene.
'For
the love of-' Annamaria sighed, rolling her eyes.
'Alright!
Roll-call!' shouted Randell. 'OK, Lord of the Rings group?'
'Oh,
I guess...that's us...' hesitated Frodo.
'Kay. Frodo
Baggins, Samwise Gamgee, King Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli the Dwarf,
Gandalf the White, Meriadoc Brandybuck, Perigren Took, Saruman of
Isengard, Eowyn of Rohan, and Elrond of Rivendall... are you all
here?' asked Randell, running his finger down the list.
'Yes!'
they all said in unison.
'Perigren? Meriadoc? Elrond? Really
now, be civilized!' Snaped roared with laughter.
'We are from
Middle-earth, my greasy haired friend.' said Elrond
mystically.
'And where is, Middle-earth? There is no such
thing!' shouted Norrington.
'Middle-earth is where it is,'
said Gandalf.
'Uh, yeah... Well, what year was it when you
left?' asked Norrington, sure that it will show that there was no
such thing as "Middle-earth".
'First year of the fourth
age.' stated Aragorn.
'Yeah... OK. Harry Potter people?'
Randell said, ignoring the angry Middle-earthians.
'Oh, of
course we have to Harry Scar-Head Potter people... he is oh-so-great!
Let's all worship baby Potter! The greedy little son of a bi-'
hissed Voldemort.
Randell ignored this and went on. 'Harry
Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Severus Snape, Albus
Dumbledore, Tom Marvalo Riddle-'
'It is not Tom Marvalo
Riddle! A cursed name! A name of my past!' roared Voldemort. 'It
is Lord Voldemort!'
'But it says here, Tom Marvalo
Riddle...'said Randell, checking the list.
'I could kill you
right now if I had my wand.' huffed Voldemort, crossing his arms
across his chest.
'Well you don't now do you?'
Voldemort
was speechless.
'Okay. On with this. Fred and George Weasley,
Draco Malfoy...'
'Draco? Oh, you people are the stupid ones!'
mocked Pippin.
'Why you little...' threatened Draco, stepping
towards him.
Pippin stared up at Draco. 'What are you gonna do
big guy? Huh? Huh?' Pippin kicked him in the shin.
Draco jumped
on Pippin, swearing and cursing. Randell ran forward and tore them
apart. 'We don't fight here! This is a place of love and
warmth!'
'Warmth? We're freezing our arses off over here!'
shouted Fred.
'Fine. I'll get on with the roll-call... ah,
forget it. I don't care if you are here or not. Okay, purpose of
the Survival Challenge. You will have to work together as one team to
make it through the cold weather without clothes, weapons or food.
You must make all of this yourselves. Every two weeks, we will have a
vote to see who gets voted off the team. It will be freezing and many
wild beasts roam these woods that could tear you apart in seconds.
You will likely lose some fingers and toes because you will not have
enough warmth. Fun, no?'
'You're a nut.' said Ron, mouth
wide open.
'No, I'm a cashew.'
Everyone was
quiet.
'Where is the bloody rum!' screamed
Jack.
Kim:
Ohmygawd! I am so sorry about this! It was my turn to write the
chapter and I got really, really behind!
Amy: I would've been
done along time ago...
Kim: Shutup. Anyway, I hope you enjoy. I
swear, it will get funnier!
Amy: Cashews!!!
Kim: smacks Amy,
grinning
Amy: Ow!!!
