Disclaimer: I don't own anything that I don't own, because if I did own what I didn't own I wouldn't have to be sitting here typing that I didn't own anything that I don't own. What I do own is everything that isn't what I don't own.

A/N: So, I updated. But I'm still deciding whether I should do weekly or two-weekly updates. I'm more likely to always update on time if it's two weekly, because I have some of this written, but I still need to write a fair bit more. Opinions welcome. I'm also taking suggestions on whether I should give a small preview at the end of chapters as to what is going to come. Thanks to everyone who reviewed. Replies are at the end of this chapter.

Chapter Three: Really Bad Movies and Unexpected Trips

'Not that you are fine. What happened to you Holly? I want the truth. Please.'

Holly had no more strength to fight against Trouble. Not when he obviously cared about her. She settled down on to her sofa next to him.

'Fine. What do you want to know?'

'Start with the bombs.'

'I walked into my office and there was some holly on my desk. The three beads were bio-bombs. I recognised them and got out of the office, then waited for the three explosions. I went back in to investigate, and then punched Mulch in the nose when he came to see what was happening. Mulch sneezed before I could heal him. I healed him after that, and then Artemis called. I had to explain to him why I was covered in blood in snot.'

'Why didn't you heal your ankle if you had magic to heal his nose?'

'I used the last of my magic on him without realising.'

'Okay. So you got the snot off before it went corrosive right?'

'Yea.'

'So then what about your ankle?'

'When I'd cleaned my office up I came home and decided to go for a run. After a couple of kilometres somebody was following me. But they kept following me. Even after I put on a burst of speed.'

Trouble could understand why this worried her. She was the fastest LEP officer. There weren't many fairies outside the LEP who could keep up with even a slow LEP officer.

'This fairy kept following me, so I turned around, to tell him to quit it, not that I thought he would. I'd already worked out I was being followed. He was wearing classic "I don't want to be seen kit". He shielded, so I ran, that's when I realised I had no magic. I kept running hard out, then I tripped and fell. That's when I did my ankle in. I lost him somehow, then I got home. I think I fell asleep after that. I all remember is being woken up by you.'

Trouble knew she was telling the truth. There were very little things that could cause Holly to do her ankle in.

'Where's your ankle?' he asked.

'What are you going to do to it?'

'Heal it. Do you want to even more damage to it?'

'No. Here.' Holly reluctantly lifted her leg up and her ankle towards Trouble. He was right, no matter how little she wanted to accept that.

Trouble was actually quite surprised that Holly hadn't clobbered him for suggesting that he heal her. Her ankle must really hurt her. He took her ankle gently in his hands, and placed it on his knee. Holly winced. Very gently he drew her sock off of it. She winced again. It was horribly swollen and red. More than twice the size it should be.

'You didn't even put ice on it, did you?'

'Fairies hate the cold Trouble. Besides, I was tired.'

Trouble sighed, typical Holly. He carefully placed his hand on her ankle and muttered 'heal'. His own blue sparks slid down his fingers and into Holly's ankle. He wasn't nearly as good at healing as her, but it was sufficient. The ankle un-swelled and Holly relaxed slightly. She went to take her ankle off of his knee. But he held up his hand to stop her.

'Don't move it for a bit. Let it rest.'

'You're worse than Root was in the Arctic,' joked Holly. She immediately wished she hadn't said it. She felt a pang of sadness. But she didn't move her ankle.

'So,' began Trouble, 'What do you want to do today?'

Trouble resolved to ask Holly about her eating habits at another point in time. He'd just try to make sure she ate something today.

'I don't know. It was your idea.'

The pair resolved to go and see a movie. The movie was called Mr. Greeds, and was about a man from a small town who went around murdering his relatives to get their inheritance.

They walked into the movie theatre. The name was oh so original. HCMT (Haven City Movie Theatre) and went to buy the over priced popcorn. Everyone knows that the popcorn at movie theatres is over-priced, but they buy it anyway, it's part of the experience.

'I might not get popcorn today, it's too expensive,' Holly began. Trouble, with his idea of Holly being anorexic immediately jumped into a plan to get her to eat the popcorn.

'I'll buy it for you if you want,' he said casually.

'No, I just don't want some today.'

'But you have to eat the popcorn.'

'Fine, I'll buy some just to make you happy.'

Holly was beginning to wonder why Trouble was so insistent that she eat the popcorn. She was beginning to wonder if he was going insane.

Trouble was beginning to wonder if Holly was going insane. Who wouldn't want movie popcorn? At least she was eating it, if somewhat reluctantly.

The movie turned out to be the worst movie ever made. Quite sad really, considering it was meant to be one of the best ever made. A lot of people must have wasted money going to that one. There simply wasn't enough blood in it. Being LEP officers and generally gung-ho and the such, both Holly and Trouble loved gory movies. Don't ask why. It's just one of those unexplainable stereotypes that seem to make sense.

Holly was greatly cheered up, even though the movie was hopeless. She decided that she should take a day off work more often. It was amazing how free the feeling of being off work was.

'That sucked,' voiced Trouble, as they left the movie theatre.

'Don't bother telling me. I noticed.'

'Sorry, it was my idea to see that.'

'Not at all what it was promoted as. They shouldn't have the word 'murder' in the trailer if they aren't going to make it bloody.'

'I agree.'

'So what was with you with wanting me to eat popcorn?' Holly knew she should probably just let it go, but she couldn't, it had become her thing since she had become a private investigator. She just couldn't let things go. Another stereotypical trait she was developing. She already had developed some of the cop ones; not all, thankfully.

Trouble was instantly uncomfortable, not many things could make him uncomfortable, but the thought of Holly trying to get back at you could strike fear into the hearts of the bravest Retrieval officers. Besides, Trouble didn't want Holly knowing exactly what he was worried about; not just yet. 'Uh, I was trying to make you day off good?' It was almost a question; asking Holly if she would accept that answer.

Holly didn't believe him. Not for one second; but he didn't seem to have any hidden agenda, so she decided to lay off him for now. He had gotten that look on his face, the one people got when they thought she was going to punch them. She nearly laughed, that look was comical no matter how many times she saw it. And she saw it a lot.

'So, you want to go get some grub? Since the movie was a total washout. I'll pay.'

Holly was beginning to wonder what on earth it was with Trouble offering to buy her food. We all know Holly Short isn't one to keep her opinions to herself.

Trouble couldn't help himself. He knew Holly was cottoning on to what he was doing, trying to make her eat and all that, but he had to try. He was too worried about her not to. He had convinced himself that Holly was going anorexic.

'You have developed a d'arvitting obsession with forcing food down my d'arvitting throat, Martha Kelp.'

'No fair Holly. My name's Trouble now.' Trouble regretted more than anything his fathers moment of drunkenness, registering his name as Martha rather than Arthur. He had insisted on having his name changed to Trouble at his manhood ceremony. Very few people knew his original name, Holly being one of those people. She pulled it out of the bag whenever she got angry at him, it was one of those things that irked him about her. He'd almost learned to live with it. Almost. He still started whining like a five year old whenever she used his original name.

'Stop acting like a baby. I'll eat if I'm hungry.'

'My bad. So do you want to go and eat?' Holly supposed it was the best she was going to get out of him. He rarely apologised with more than the words "my bad", and it was even rarer that he meant them. It was obvious that he didn't mean them in this case, for some odd reason he wanted to force her to eat. Odd really.

'Yea, I suppose. Anywhere but Spud's.'

'Don't even talk about that place. Thinking about it makes me sick.'

'Haha, I don't get how those tourists can eat that stuff.'

'True.'

'So… Where do you want to go then?'

'How about that Chinese shop. You know, the one that was there before that new food court?'

'Yea, their food was always real good.'

'It isn't an eat in place though. You can't force the food down my throat,' joked Holly.

'I'm not trying to force the food down your throat.' Trouble knew this was a lie, but Holly was cottoning on to him.

'Sure you aren't.'

'But you are coming back to my place to eat.'

'You live on the other side of Police Plaza from me,' moaned Holly. The city of Haven was basically set out around Police Plaza, because that was the original building that had to be there to stop the mud people discovering the people. The city had kind of spread out from there, and it was basically a given that LEP officers lived somewhere around the Plaza, and not too far away. In actuality the city of Haven wasn't that large, it took little over three hours to travel across (i.e. walk. What do you think the fairies are? Barbarians? What sort of idiots drove when you would just get traffic jams because everyone was sitting on their fat posteriors? It also got rid of possibilities of obesity. Mud people have a lot to answer for, allowing people to become obese and obsessed with their vehicles)., Because fairies had become used to being quite close to everything they detested having to travel further than fifteen minutes to anything, inside the metropolis, naturally, in the chutes, they were used to longer journey's. It was a given when you lived under the earth. Holly did not want to have to undertake the thirty-five minute walk from Trouble's apartment to her own. Of course Holly was forgetting something.

'Holly, I moved about a month ago. Remember?'

Holly kept forgetting that. She just couldn't get used to the idea of Trouble not living on the other side of the Plaza.

'Oh yeah, my bad.'

Trouble was worried about Holly. She just couldn't get it into her head that he had moved. He had decided to move for no apparent reason, and he had found the perfect apartment, down a street he never knew existed. He didn't really have time for apartment shopping, so it was highly likely that any apartment he had seen would have been perfect for him. Going out for a run a couple of days after buying the apartment he ran into Holly. Literally. He had go complete the ritual after using quite a bit of magic on healing the broken nose Holly gave him before she realised who it was. No doubt he would have gotten even more of a beating if she hadn't known him. Needless to say Sool wasn't too happy. It was actually quite strange, he had seemed almost worried about Holly when he had said he had run into her. Or was worried as Sool can be. His exact words were "You didn't hurt Short did you? I don't need her in here causing a fuss". Like I said, as worried as beings without feelings can be. Anyway, it turned out that Holly lived around the corner from where Trouble now lived. Only a five minute walk. Yet Holly seemed surprised every time she saw him. He decided she must just have so much on her plate with her PI business with Mulch. Frond knows that the little reprobate left most of the work to Holly. At least the mud boy appeared to be worried about her and helping her out.

It was at that point something in Holly's pocket started ringing. The communicator, the other one of the pair she had given Artemis. Usually she had it set to vibrate, but she had a feeling it might look slightly odd if her pocket started vibrating, so she had it set to ring.

'Uhh, Trouble, you might not want to hear this.'

'Doesn't matter. I'm off duty, and I'm not going to help Sool if I have a say in the matter,' he grinned, 'If Julius were around I might not ignore it.'

Trouble immediately regretted saying that. It opened the still raw wound in him, and he knew it would be worse for Holly, she had seen him die. But it was true. He would not have disregarded law breaking and not told the Commander, even when he was off duty. Yet the words also had a special significance to Holly.

'If Julius was alive then half the Koboi thing wouldn't have happened the way it did and Artemis either wouldn't have his memories, would be a friend to the people, or I would hate him.'

'Holly, that's not what I meant.'

'Right. Well… I'm taking this call.'

That signalled that their discussion was over. Besides, Holly had left Artemis waiting on the end of a ringing communicator for long enough.

'Hi,' she said as she finally answered the call.

Artemis was relieved; he was beginning to think that Holly was never going to pick up the communicator, before she picked it up, naturally. He wasn't an idiot, after all.

'Hello Holly. My apologies at interrupting your day off, but I was wondering how you were.'

'What, not even any information for me?'

'You said we could talk socially one day.'

'In the middle of one of Haven's busiest streets probably isn't the best place, Mud Boy.'

'So you're still with Trouble?'

'Yes. Why would you want to know?' Artemis sighed, typical Holly, a comeback for almost every occasion, although not as good as some of the comebacks he came up with. He had to admit they were excellent, some of his comebacks. What St. Bartleby's wouldn't do to have him as the rebutter (third speaker) on their debating team; unfortunately for them Artemis Fowl does not get involved in School activities.

'You know this call is illegal, right? And Trouble is a LEP Officer.'

'Still, I should let you go. Have fun on your date.'

'I AM NOT ON A DATE YOU NEANDERTHAL,' screeched Holly. She appears rather sensitive about these things, thought Artemis, struggling to hide a grin. Criminal Masterminds do not grin, and they most certainly do not use the word 'lollipops'.

He hung up the communicator, or rather, pushed the disconnect button. It appeared even the great Artemis Fowl ended up using some of the typical Human clichés. You don't even hang up the phone really, unless it is mounted on a wall higher than you are tall, technically you put it down. Artemis shook his head, it was actually quite amusing looking at how illogical some aspects of the English language were.

Artemis decided to work on some of his computer software. Recently it had become his goal to design software that would make the software of companies such as Windows and Apple by far obsolete, thereby bankrupting the companies. The head honchos of the companies had been far too rich, far too long. The only family with the right to be rich and stay rich, in Artemis Fowl's mind at least, is the Fowl family.

The programming and coding was easy for Artemis, and as he typed in the codes as if it were his second language, which it basically was for him, he was internally laughing at the idiots who needed university degrees to be able to do this and yet still weren't very good at it. Idiots.

After a few minutes of blissful peace and quiet to work on his programme which Artemis knew would not last long (one could rarely go uninterrupted for long in Fowl Manor) Juliet began to rap on his door. "Told you so" the more childish part of his brain began to tell the part which had hoped Artemis was just being a pessimist. Artemis ordered the two parts of his brain to be quiet, with yet another part of his brain. Artemis wondered how many parts he had in his brain. Good question really, considering most people were only bright enough to think with one or two parts of their brain.

'Artemis, your Mother wants to see you outside by the Kowhai trees.'

Artemis's mother had recently developed rather an obsession with planting trees from different countries in their garden, anything but trees from Ireland. Worrying really. Among the trees she had planted were Kowhai and Kauri from New Zealand and Wattle from Australia. Very worrying; but that was Angeline Fowl for you.

'Alright. Thank you Juliet.' Juliet huffed as she walked away down the hall to prepare the lemonade Mrs Fowl had ordered; Artemis was always oh so formal. It wasn't like she was a servant. Juliet sometimes wondered who Artemis was talking to in his room. After all, Artemis and Butler had decided not to give her memories back, so she had no idea that the fairies existed. They had decided that, since she was always off on some wrestling tour or another, she did not need the information in her head as something she had to remember not to tell. Butler also reasoned that, with Sool as commander, the LEP may turn up at any time with big murderous weapons, and try to wipe his and Master Artemis' mind again. Butler didn't want Juliet to have to go through that. He also didn't want her remembering about his slight...aging condition. It wasn't that bad, after all.

Artemis stood up, not before closing his programmes. It wouldn't be good if his father found out that he was still trying to bankrupt companies, especially after he had been grounded for doing exactly that three weeks ago. How on earth (or under it, he reminded himself) did his father find out that Artemis was bankrupting companies for a little light relief? And where on earth (or under it) did he get the idea of grounding Artemis? It wasn't like Artemis was a normal teenager, so why should he get normal teenagers punishment? His father knew he wasn't the most social of creatures, so he hadn't grounded him from going out. He had grounded him from using electronics (i.e. computers, mp3 players, ipods, DVD players, Televisions, Cell phones, Radios, etc.). Not that Artemis really used electronics other than his Computer and His Cell Phone on a regular basis, except security camera's, and he needed his computer to use them, besides, technically his father had banned him from using the Manor's security cameras. Not that it stopped Artemis. The point was that Artemis had been grounded. He suffered severe separation anxiety, he hadn't realised quite how much of a friend his computer was to him; he had been overjoyed to get it back.

Artemis walked out of his room, through the Manor and out of the back door which could be found in the kitchen. Artemis looked at the oven. He knew how it was supposed to work, in theory, however, he had never tried. He had read that ovens could be extremely temperamental, and that you had to learn how to use them. Apparently cooking was one of those skills that could not be entirely mastered from a book. It would be interesting to discover if this was true. One day, he decided, one day I will learn how to cook, just to prove that I can do anything if I want to.

Brooding on things that Criminal Masterminds really wouldn't be caught dead thinking about (maybe Artemis should take a leaf out of Foaly's book and start wearing a tin-foil hat, just to make sure that people couldn't read his mind. After all, it would be embarrassing if some of his …associates… found out that he had decided to learn how to cook) Artemis walked over to where his mother was sitting, or rather, reclining, in one of those ridiculous beach chairs. She even had the brightly coloured drink with the umbrella sticking out of it sitting on the table made of wood painted white next to her. "We aren't in Fiji" thought Artemis. Angeline Fowl had recently decided that, instead of travelling all over the world, the world would come to her. Hence the obsession with trees from around the world.

'Arty, darling, how are you?'

'I'm well, thank you, mother. How are you?

'I'm fine Arty,' and although Angeline Fowl smiled as she said that, the smile was masking a wave of grief that she felt every time Artemis spoke to her so formally.

'Arty darling, why are you so formal? I'm you mum for goodness sake, you don't have to be all formal,' Angeline was almost pleading with her son at this point. She so wanted him to open up his cold exterior and let her in.

'You can't just expect me to change mother. Formality was the way things were run around here for a long time.' Artemis felt for his mother. He wasn't that bad, he didn't enjoy making living creatures suffer, and he really did care about his mother, he just wasn't really a people person. In fact, no matter how hard he tried, he just kept shutting people out; he had never perfected the art of letting people in and putting his trust in them. He decided to make a genuine effort, for his mother's sake, he decided to try and open up to her.

'Mother, um,' Artemis scolded himself, he was meant to always know what to say; um isn't even a word. He decided to try again 'Mother, I, I don't respect people, I don't trust humans, I've been let down too many times.' There, he'd said it, it wasn't that hard, was it? It was worth it. Angeline's face positively lit up, her son was finally sharing something with her.

'Arty, now you mention it, I've been planning a little weekend for you and your father…'

"Uh oh," thought Artemis, "I should have known, Mother always has some hidden agenda, and she can play me like a fiddle." Artemis scolded himself, more clichés, next thing you knew he'd been talking in a pompous old-style top o' the morning English accent and drinking a cup of tea with his pinky finger sticking out. Don't ask how he made that association; this is Artemis Fowl we are talking about.

Artemis senior amazingly decided that moment to walk out the back door. "What an astounding coincidence," thought Artemis glumly. Knowing his mother, whatever she had planned was not technologically orientated, and had something to do with father son bonding. She seemed to have an obsession with family life at the moment. Artemis found this distinctly worrying; he was being treated more and more like a normal teenager every day. And in case you didn't notice, Artemis Fowl is not an ordinary teenager.

'Angeline, did you tell him?'

"Aha," thought Artemis, with grim triumph, "something is going on." It wasn't as if he hadn't been certain of the fact as soon as his mother had mentioned a little weekend.

'I mentioned it, but I haven't told him the details yet.'

'Well we should probably do that; it is in a week, after all.'

A/N: The end of that chapter. I'm going to tell you that we meet up with the stalker in the next chapter, though we don't find out who he is. Sorry that this chapter is mostly irrelevant description, but I felt it necessary to the overall plot.

Review Replies:

refloc: Umm, thanks. Nice long chapters for this story. I have decided. Considering this story is most likely going to end up a lot longer than my other story.

angelmayumi: clues as to the identity of the stalker in the next chapter. Holly and Trouble will probably end up hooking up, but that isn't going to be exactly central to the plot.

wackywildcrazy: Thanks. I'm honoured. Clues as to the identity of the stalker in the next chapter.

CoffeeAndCherryBrandy: Nearly made me hurl too, don't worry. I really don't know what the appeal of Trouble is. I think for me it is that there is so much room to develop his character. He could be almost like an OC, except you know just some things about him. And we all know he is Holly's friend. At least we do if we've read her interview in the Files. If you see him as a boring individual, I suppose that is your interpretation. Really, I see him as quite an exciting individual who is really good at his job. And quite good looking, in a pointy sort of way.

KatesMaster: Opal's still in a cell. But there will be clues as to the identity of the stalker in the next chapter.

Stiggy: Would I tell you if it was Root? Tissue. Dwarf's happen to always have a couple of tissues in their pockets, for that exact reason. Or at least, that's what I decided. Or dwarfs could immune to the effects of their own snot? I might stick with the immunity. Good question though. Forrest Gump, right? I saw that for the first time last weekend. Very proud of myself. Great movie. Feel free to order me to update, most of this just comes out. I only write something more than once or edit it when I have writers block. I try to, but it just stuffs it up. What you get is what came out of my head through my fingers.

Sorry if I missed anyone. Thanks to everyone who reviewed. Please review. Till next time.