Ok, this is my first try at writing a fan fic. It is written as a missing scene between The Phoenix Lament and The White Tomb. Written to the song "Fix You" by Coldplay. Please read and review.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters, songs ortrademarks included in this piece.
HALF BLOOD PRINCE SPOILERS
Tonks gripped the edge of the sink tightly. She felt as though she might be sick.
When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
She hadn't meant to say all that she had said, but she simply couldn't stand it anymore. She could stand worrying every night, not sleeping because she didn't know if he was alive or dead. She could stand losing him to his condition every month. She could stand knowing that one day his job or hers could take them away from each other. But she couldn't stand knowing that he wouldn't let her love him, or allow himself to love her back.
When the tears come streaming down your face
And you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Tonks looked at herself in the slightly tarnished mirror. A pale, heart-shaped face, the same brown eyes and mousy hair that she had all year stared back at her. She'd been having trouble changing her appearance, and after a while, she simply didn't want to anymore. She hadn't looked like this for a long time, since she was a child and couldn't sustain her changes, reverting back to this appearance as her 'normal.'
And then the tears began to flow. They dripped down her face and fell into the sink, but she didn't care. She cried for Dumbledore, she cried for Sirius, she cried for Harry, and she cried for herself. Exhaustion and depression took over as the stress of the last few hours came crashing down…
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
I will try
To fix you
She heard a knock on the door and a voice from the other side called, "Tonks?"
Not wanting to be disturbed, she ignored the voice on the other side of the door, hoping he would go away. No such luck.
He opened the door quietly, but she turned away from him. She hurried to lock herself in a stall, but ran her toe right into the door.
"Ouch! Oh dammit!"
High up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
If you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth
She settled for leaning against a sink, resting her weight on her other foot and biting her lip, attempting to ignore the throbbing in her right big toe.
He approached her slowly, but she refused to look at him, her eyes instead fixed upon the rather fascinating drain in the floor.
"Tonks…I — I'm sorry."
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
I will try
To fix you
He hesitated while she continued to stare at the floor, her eyes welling with tears that she willed herself not to shed. He paced a little, hands clasped behind him.
"I'm sorry that I pushed you away. I just wanted…I wanted you to have someone who was worthy of you." He stopped pacing, putting a shaky hand against the wall. His voice was breaking, and he struggled to continue. "It's not that I don't love you, I just…You need…You should have someone who is…"
She looked up suddenly, her eyes sharp. "I think I can decide these things for myself, Remus." It came out a little harsher than she wanted.
Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face and I…
Avoiding eye contact, she took a step closer, running her slender fingers along his graying hairline. When she touched the scars on his face, he flinched, but she stepped closer. Slowly, he wrapped one arm around her waist, and she looked up at him, her eyes filled with tears.
Tears streaming down your face
I promise you I will lean from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face and I…
He sighed. "Oh Dora, I'm so sorry."
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
I will try
To fix you
And then, at four in the morning in the middle of a girl's bathroom, he kissed her.