Day Five
A life of nightmares
There would be these times when he would be depressed and continually shout with such fury at me, no one else; just me. I would obviously indicate how upset I was and he would come to my rescue; or so I hoped, and change. He would twist it with all his might, until it could not be twisted any more and make it my problem; not his.
For many years he continually tormented and tortured my soul, he would lock it away and when I was let out he wouldn't let me leave. I had the chance to leave so many times, but I couldn't bring myself to it. I guess in someway or another, I was craving the attention; craving the drama in my life; just so I had an excuse for what I did. And it worked, it always did. I could blame him and not feel anymore hurt from it. I never quite realised how lame it was of me to that all the time, but in the same, I felt better. It's better than doing what I used to.
There would always be the good days when we would be happy and life couldn't be better, but like everything, there would always be a bad day to follow. I always dreaded those. I wanted to run when I knew it was coming but I couldn't; he wouldn't let me. I would never have the chance. And now I do. He would constantly drive up and down our street; it was so peaceful and happy when he wasn't there. I feel as though I brought some disease to this euphoria of a neighbour hood. I want to tell everyone that I didn't mean to, he was really quite the guy when I met him, and mum and dad never want me to leave him. But now he is anything but a guy. He has become something more. Something so terrifying and monstrous that there is no suitable word for it. He is something so unlike what I remember him as when we first met, when we first fell in love. Now it's anything but.
It's like he had turned into this monster, this thing that had no feelings or emotions apart from anger and hatred. He'd hit me whenever I had been out with my friends, or when I wasn't home when he rang. It was horrific, and yet; I couldn't leave. He knew always where to find me, how to get to me. He was the only one that knew my secrets. If he told my family; life would become much more like my nightmares. My family began to love him like he was their own son. How could anyone love such a beast? Of course, he never let them see that side of them, it was only me. Not even my friends knew how these bruises and scars would appear on my delicate flesh. "It was him", I wanted to shout out to them, tell them how I got them, ask for help. But if I did; who knows if he would have brought my end sooner than what I wanted.
Though, I admit; it did feel like my end had come; like my life had finally come to a stop. I guess now, when I look back on the life I had before Petesburg, I'm happy I'm here; I've finally escaped it all.
I stop reflecting the life I said goodbye to and look up into those cold eyes. Though this time, I feel stronger when I look, I feel like I can get the better of him this time, there's nothing that can stop me; not even him, and he knew that. I saw his eyes slowly begin to widen in fear. I was finally going to win, he was going to be gone from my life; forever.