"Julie, I cannot believe you've been hiding this hottie from us in the newsroom! On the other hand, maybe I can…"
Phoebe glanced up to find one of the paper's gossip columnists standing before her waving a huge bouquet of wildflowers. She smiled in confusion at her grinning colleague, "All right, Tina, what's going on?"
"I'm talking about that gorgeous hunk of a man from your past who's waiting outside your office. These, by the way," she gave the flowers to Julie, "are from him."
Phoebe peeked through her blinds but, while she appreciated the view of the tall, dark, and handsome guy standing there, she didn't recognize him. "I'm sorry but I've got no idea what's go --"
"Read the card," Tina insisted, "before you go out there and thank him before I thank him for you." She ogled the man again and shook her head, "I swear, Julie, if my ex looked like that I'd have never signed those papers."
Phoebe laughed as she opened the envelope and was about to correct the woman when she read the words written on the small card. She gasped and her hand shook as she read them again.
"Hey, Julie, you okay? Is it one of those dizzy spells you still get? You'd better sit, you look a little pale." Tina grabbed the card and sat her down on the edge of her desk.
"It's not possible," Phoebe whispered as she glanced past her colleague at her closed door.
Tina couldn't help but read the card, "Help me heal the safest place I know for without love how will it ever be safe?" She glanced at Julie and shrugged, "Sweet in a strange sort of way. Details, girl, who is he and why aren't you together and what's he doing here now?"
But Phoebe didn't answer. She didn't even hear the questions as she walked unsteadily to the door and opened it. She began gasping for air when he turned and silently stretched his arms out to her. And it took all of ten seconds for her to launch herself into them. "Oh my God," she whispered into his neck as he lifted her off the ground. She squeezed her eyes shut and didn't care that her colleagues were probably all staring and wondering. She simply held onto him even tighter and requested, "Don't let go."
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She closed the door to her room and turned to him. She couldn't help but smile at seeing his face again, not the stranger's face he'd worn in her office, but his true face, the one she hadn't seen in nearly three years. They hadn't spoken a word to each other from the moment they'd hugged in her office and she was afraid she was hallucinating from the nearly month-old concussion. She reached out tentatively and touched his cheek with her fingertips. "I don't understand," she murmured to herself, "you feel so real. Are hallucinations supposed to feel so real?"
Immediately concerned by her pale countenance, Cole led her to the bed and sat her down. The fact that she did so in a dazed state did nothing to alleviate his worry. "I'm real, Phoebe, for the moment anyway."
"You're here? You're really here?" When he nodded, she couldn't stop herself from exclaiming, "Why?"
"You called for me," he said simply. He'd given into his feelings at the office when he'd held her but he couldn't afford to make any more mistakes. He needed to set things right, not confuse her even more, and he stepped back from her. "I think there are some things you need to tell me before I leave."
"I don't understand," she repeated as she stared at him, "how is it even possible that you're here?"
"You, of all witches, know how hard it is to keep a good demon down," he teased.
"That's not even funny, Cole!"
He nodded apologetically and admitted, "Piper called me."
"Piper? I don't understand. You don't exist." She closed her eyes and felt the tears stinging. "You don't exist," she softly repeated.
Cole felt his control over the situation slipping as Phoebe's shock grew but he didn't step closer as he quickly explained, "I exist in another plane…in limbo. Piper found a spell, or created one, I don't know and I don't care. She wanted me to talk to you."
"Why?" Phoebe opened her eyes and, in a tired voice, repeated herself, "I don't understand. Limbo?" Her eyes suddenly widened and she began gasping as in her office, "Limbo? The limbo where she nearly died?" She jumped from the bed, "Piper!"
"Calm down," he warned as he held her back, "and take some deep breaths." The last thing he wanted was for her to hyperventilate. "Piper's fine. She's not dead and she's not dying. I told you, she used a spell to call me." As he rubbed her back, he could feel the changes in her body as her mind made new connections and he confirmed, "I was there. I convinced her to trust in Leo's love for her."
"You were the old friend," Phoebe whispered. Her legs were trembling but she jerked back from his embrace, "I thought I'd sensed something familiar…Why didn't she tell me? Why didn't you?"
"I only wanted to help you," he confessed. "You were treading a dangerous path and I needed you to remember love and why it was so important. I didn't want you to end up in limbo with me."
She glared at him, "What makes you think I was headed there? And what gives you the right to play with my life like that?"
He wasn't going to let her anger confuse or distract him, "Because I love you and I will do anything within my power to keep you safe."
Once again, he'd completely disarmed her and she sank helplessly onto the mattress, "Why?"
Cole quickly knelt before her and tipped her chin up with his finger, "Because you are light and truth and have saved me from a fate worse than death."
"I don't understand," she sniffled, trying to fight the tears threatening to flow.
He swept some locks of hair behind her ear, "You opened my heart, Phoebe. You taught me about love and there was never any going back. I know I made mistakes, terrible mistakes that can never be forgiven, but I must've done something right or I'd never have ended up in limbo. And now my job is to use the lessons you taught me to help others, like I did for Piper."
"I'm sorry, Cole," she croaked as she grabbed his hand to her heart and squeezed it tight. "I'm so sorry for not being strong enough to sav--"
He interrupted her with an angry kiss, "Don't ever think you weren't strong enough. Don't ever say you didn't save me."
"But you're in limbo," she nearly cried. "You deserve peace."
"I'm neither demon nor angel," he shook his head, "and there is no place for me other than limbo. I accept it, Phoebe, and, in some strange way, I am at peace."
"That's not what I mean," she argued.
"I know," he smiled.
But she stopped him before he could stand, "Cole…exactly how real are you?"
"I held you in my arms in your office. You led me by the hand up to your room." He kissed her again, more tenderly this time, "You can feel me, you know I'm real."
She shook her head, "I mean how real." She caressed his cheek, "Real enough to be with me?" He seemed surprised and hesitant and she whispered, "I need you, Cole. I need to be with you. Even if it's for the last time….Please…"
He gazed into her eyes and knew she was being honest. He saw the desire…and the love. "I need you to say it."
Phoebe knew what he meant, what he wanted to hear, but couldn't give it to him. "I'm sorry, I can't."
"You have to," he urged, "or you'll never be free, truly free, to move on." She cast her eyes down and he reached for her hand and pressed it to his lips, "I can't be with you unless you let me in all the way. Open your heart, Phoebe."
"I can't," she whispered and continued before he could interrupt, "don't you know? Can't you feel it?" She guided his hand back to her heart, "You're already there, Cole. You've always been there."
"Then say it…"
She gazed into his fearful eyes and was no longer afraid. And she found the strength to smile as she confessed, "I love you, Cole. Even in the worst of my anger or my apathy, I loved you. Every love I've felt for other men has been compared to what I've felt for you and while they were always real and true they never came close to what we had, what we have."
He smiled in return even as he corrected her, "Had, Phoebe. You were right the first time."
She shook her head, "I can't let go. I didn't realize it, not until the accident when Darryl told me I called out your name." She gently rubbed his lips with her finger and smiled when he nipped at the tip, "But I can't deny it anymore. I can't let go of us."
"Who says you have to?" he questioned. "Just because I'm gone from your life doesn't mean you have to forget or that you have to stop loving me. I know you've loved others since me. Hell, I want you to find someone new. But that doesn't mean you can't still leave a part of your heart for me too."
"How is that fair?"
He traced the contours of her chin with his hand, "If I'd been a normal mortal and died a normal death, would you not still love me while you tried to move on?" He smiled as she thought over his challenge, "Aren't you the one who told me that love is all encompassing, that you can love many different people without betraying one for another? I know you love me, Phoebe, I've always known it. And it's okay for you to love another."
"I wish…"
"Me too…"
Phoebe squeezed his hand again, "Then love me, Cole. For tonight, I want to feel your love, around me, in me…I want to forget about everyone else in this world and know only you. I want you to love me."
Cole leaned forward, rising and pushing her down on the mattress at the same time. Pressing himself close, he assured her, "I never stopped, Phoebe, and I never will."
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"Sweetie, are you sure there's nothing you want to talk about?" Piper asked as she stood at the stove and stared at her younger sister who sat at the table.
"Not right now," Phoebe said as she stared into her cereal bowl. She'd hoped the nausea would go away if she'd eaten something but it hadn't and she pushed her bowl away.
Piper stared at her sister with worry. She'd been right about Phoebe needing to see Cole but whatever good came from it seemed to have disappeared little more than a week later. Because for three weeks now, Phoebe had been moping around the house, jumpy, tired, and sick to her stomach, and suddenly Piper realized why. "Oh, God, Phoebe, are you pregnant?"
Phoebe froze and stuttered, "How, how…"
Piper rushed to the table and sat next to her sister, "Is it true?"
"I haven't taken a test," Phoebe whispered, "but I think so." But, almost immediately, she shook her head, "I'm sure."
Piper took a deep breath, "Then why are you so unhappy? Shouldn't we be celebrating? This's what you wanted, isn't it?" She smiled and pressed her hand to Phoebe's stomach, "Your little girl." But Phoebe burst into tears and Piper quickly hugged her sister. "Sweetie, what's wrong? Didn't you talk to Dex? He's not happy about the baby?"
"I haven't told him," Phoebe finally whispered.
Surprised, Piper continued rubbing her sister's back. "I know it's been a while since you've seen him, other than in the elevator I mean, but you won't be able to keep this a secret much longer and he has a right to know."
"Not if it's not his…"
Phoebe's voice had barely been more than a whisper and Piper wasn't sure she heard right. "I don't understand, who else could it be if -- Oh, Pheebs, you mean you and Cole?" She felt Phoebe's head nod and asked, "And you and Dex…"
Phoebe slowly pulled back and shrugged, "Not since I broke it off with him which was before Cole's visit but it's possible…"
"Didn't the doctor help you figure out when the baby was conceived?"
Phoebe shook her head, "I haven't gone."
"But why? Honey, you need to see the doctor and be examined," Piper told her, "if only to make sure you're both healthy."
"I'm afraid," Phoebe confessed in a whisper. "I'm afraid to know."
Piper stroked her sister's arm and sympathetically said, "This isn't something that's going to go away and the sooner you start dealing with the truth, the better it will be for you."
"What if it's Dex's baby?"
"Then you'll talk to him and see where you go from here," Piper shrugged. "You hurt him when you asked for space but that doesn't mean he still doesn't want to be with you. You had a premonition about being married to him so maybe this is what's supposed to happen."
"What about Cole?"
"Cole knows about the premonition," Piper gently reminded her, "and he's fully expecting this to happen."
"I mean what if this is Cole's baby?" Phoebe sniffled. "How do I raise this little girl knowing her father is stuck in a limbo because of me? And if he's still watching me, how can he let go, never try to be with her or, worse, let someone else raise her?"
"You'll raise this little girl like you've been planning for the past two years," Piper stated, "with love. No matter who the father is." Her sister looked back at her hopefully and she smiled, "I have no doubt that either man would be proud to have you be his baby's mother. Keep that in mind. And keep in mind that Paige and I won't let you go through this alone. No matter who the father is."
Phoebe didn't need any magical power to know her sister was being completely honest. It wouldn't matter who the father of her daughter was and she would always be able to count on her sisters. She reached for her older sister and hugged Piper, "I love you, Piper. I love you so much. Thank you for everything."
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"What now, Piper?" he questioned with annoyance. "How do you expect us to move on if you keep pulling me back?"
"There are ways of moving on and there are ways of moving on." She caught his confused expression and shook her head, "Never mind. Look, things aren't working out with Dex. She's still avoiding him."
"I told you," he smirked. "He's all wrong for her." But he realized Piper wouldn't have called him if it wasn't serious and he admitted, "I felt her distress. But I can't come back to her every time she has a broken heart." As much as he'd want to.
"There's more to it this time," Piper told him, "more you don't know. Look, I've finally convinced her to see the doctor and --"
"What happened?" he interrupted in concern. "Is she still having after-effects from that concussion?"
"I know you can't stay long and don't want to waste any time." Piper handed him a piece of paper and stated, "That's the address. Just go."
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Cole appeared in the dim room and stared in shock at the scene before him.
"I'm sorry, sir, but you can't be in here."
Phoebe heard a gasp and turned her head. "Cole…"
The technician still held the ultrasound wand in the air and warned, "Sir, I'm afraid you have to leave."
"No," Phoebe whispered as she held out her hand to Cole who's gaze remained glued to her barely noticeable bump.
The young woman suddenly smiled, "Oh, are you the daddy?"
Tears flowed down Phoebe's cheeks and she made no effort to wipe them away. She flexed her fingers to him and, as he hesitantly reached for her hand, she smiled, "Yes, yes he is."
The End