Have you ever been swimming in the lake at Hogwarts?
No?
Well that's okay, most people haven't.
I probably wouldn't have, either, if it weren't for the dare. I suppose it was the scariest dare they could think of (other than the one we gave to Marcy, of course - she had to propose to Professor Snape and french kiss him in front of the whole school! You probably remember that one though. She was stuck in the hospital wing for a month, and she's still finding scales and slime in the oddest of places.) After all, they really, really, really wanted to know who I fancy. They'd been teasing me about it for months, but my lips were sealed. That's why they dared me to go skinny dipping in the lake; they figured I'd give in and choose "Truth" instead.
Why would I be scared to go swimming in the lake?
Boy, you are new here, aren't you. Hasn't anyone told you about the Giant Squid? He lives down at the bottom of the lake. Every couple of years or so he'll grab one of the firsties and drown him or her. Of course, he's not the only danger in that lake. There's all sorts of scary sea creatures. There's even merfolk!
Boy, if you don't think merpeople are scary, you're the stupidest person I know. That or a muggleborn.
Oh, you are? Never mind then. It's not your fault that you don't know anything.
For your information, merfolk can be really terrifying. I suppose they're not that bad if you're really polite and nice to them, but they don't like it when students invade their territory without asking. And before you ask, swimming in the lake counts as invading their territory. Considering the fact that I don't know of a single human who speaks Mermish...Just don't go blaming me if you tick them off.
And if that's not enough for you, there's grindylows and who knows what else swimming around in that water down there.
Well, needless to say, they were expecting me to back down and tell them what they wanted to know. Did I ever show them!
I'll tell you one thing they didn't know, though - I have a bit of selkie in my blood from way back when, so I knew I'd probably be safer in the water than most. Most sea creatures wouldn't want to risk angering my clan and would stay far away. As for the merfolk, well, I can't give you any details, but my clan and theirs has a sort of an understanding, you see? So no worries there.
My biggest fear was the Giant Squid. He's big enough that even the threat of my clan might not stop him from coming after me if he was in the wrong sort of mood. So let me tell you, when I saw those tentacles reaching for me within moments of my diving into the water-!
Well, ah...don't worry, he certainly wasn't in a harmful mood. Did you know that at certain times of the year selkies apparently give off a hormone that is irresistible to certain sea creatures? I certainly didn't.
What does all this have to do with the father of my child? You certainly aren't the brightest one, now are you? What did you expect? I'm carrying a little squidlet.