A Place in This World
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CHAPTER 22
Lady A'awynn Yancey did not feel like a lady at this particular moment. Her long, wavy, auburn hair was falling wispily around her heart-shaped, dirt covered face, playfully escaping the pull that she had used to put it up. The paisley dress she wore was painfully soiled, which matched the rest of her, all the way down to her dainty bare feet. The colorful array of pansies that she had just finished bedding was joyfully laughing at her as each flower seemed to reach for the sun. A'awynn stood up and placed her filthy hands at the small of her back and bent backwards, removing some of the tension that had settled there from bending over for too long.
A hoard of children, all just as filthy as she, came traipsing up to her. They ranged in age from three-years-old to eleven-years-old. She grinned as they approached her. "Lady Awyn, Lady Aywn!" Four-year-old Carlie Hanson could not yet pronounce the unusual name correctly, but she bounced eagerly up to A'awynn waving a letter in her face. "Thish jus comed fur you," she said with a very evident lisp. "Can we herred what it says? Please, purdy please!"
A'awynn snatched the letter from the little grimy hand and scooped the pint size girl up into her lap as she plopped down on the well-kept lawn. The other children gathered around her as she opened the letter. "It is from my best friend in Scotland, Kaitlyn Balinero; Lady Kaitlyn Balinero. She is writing me to let me know about her family." A'awynn glanced up at the eager faces that waited for her every word. "Oh alright! I'll just read the letter to you!"
The thin paper was unfolded and A'awynn cleared her throat, the words were read with the greatest of dramatic flair, pretending like she was addressing the finest gathering of the highest nobles in all of the United Kingdom.
"Dearest A'awynn,
I hope this letter finds you well. Your work at the orphanage is so important and I am so proud of you for taking on this foreboding but rewarding task. Not enough nobles get involved with their people to the point that you do. I find it very refreshing; and I will join you again some time soon.
The main reason for my letter is to let you know of something wonderful that has happened (No, I have not meant a man). Father has finally located Erik! After all these years, I will have my brother with me again! I am so thankful to God for this answer to our prayers. Mother is beside herself with joy and has spent the last two days in a prayerful vigil; giving God the glory for this wonderful blessing!
Father and Erik should be here by Thursday, May 18; just two days! So I am sure that by the time you receive this letter, they will already have been here for a period.
Please make an effort to come as soon as you can and spend some time with us. I really want you to meet Erik, as he is very special to me. You indicated that your stint with the orphanage was going to be up on the June 1, so I am anticipating your arrival soon thereafter.
It has been a long two years since I have seen you and I am anxious to get caught up on all the events that have happened in your life; beginning, of course, with any eligible men that you have encountered. The last time you wrote, you had been seeing a man named Wesley Gardner, how is that progressing?
I so look forward to seeing you soon. After Fernando died, you were the only one that kept my head above the water. I know that you loved James, but I also know that his loss was not as devastating to you as it would have been if he were not more of a father figure to you than a husband.
But alas, these are subjects destined for late night jaunts in the gardens and afternoon strolls by the lake. I know that I am rattling on and on, so I will end this gibberish. I anticipate your arrival with baited breath.
Always Yours,
Kaitlyn"
A'awynn folded the letter back up and placed it in the right pocket of her worn dress. Yes, her stay was coming to an end at the Wilton Orphanage. She had volunteered for this humbling experience when the priest at St. John's had asked her if she would be willing to represent the modern nobility on behalf of the Parrish. A'awynn had readily accepted and had left the following week to begin her "ministry".
For months, she had been at a loss for ways to escape the ordinary, mundane existence of the noble woman. Her independent spirit and vast wealth, thanks to her late husband, allowed her the means to pursue avenues that other women could only dream of. The orphanage had given her the opportunity to combine her deep love of children with her need to explore the unknown. It had worked famously.
A'awynn had discovered that money could not buy you everything. These children, none of whom had any wealth whatsoever, were the mainstay of her life. She planned her days around them; she planned her nights around them…she planned her life around them. They loved unconditionally, not expecting anything in return. They had won her heart in a matter of moments.
"Are you going to go and meet Erik?"Lance Dermont questioned. He was a sandy-haired pre-adolescent with the biggest crush on A'awynn. He had dancing, baby blue eyes and the cutest pug nose spattered with freckles.
A'awynn replied back, "Yes, Lance. I am. My friend needs me to do this for her and she has been there for me on many occasions. It is the least I can do."
"Are you going to take Lacey with you?" Darma Morrison asked. Darma was going to be a real beauty in time. She had bright, hazel eyes and long, chestnut colored hair. She stood 5'2" already, and she was only 9!
A'awynn thought about her own 5'8" frame, she was considered tall for a woman in any polite society. "Yes Darma, I am. Lacey is my daughter now, and I love her as though I had given birth to her myself." Satisfied with her answers, the children disbanded quietly, leaving a wake of laughter in their stead.
A'awynn thought long and hard about Kaitlyn's letter. It would be good to go home, but she was going to miss this little corner of Ireland where she had spent the last two years of her life. She was so far away from the hustle and bustle of Dublin and Glasgow. She was far away from the demands of being the widow of an English Lord. James had definitely left her enough money to do as she desired; for he had no living relatives to weasel their way into her life and demand retribution or reward.
She was so deep in thought, that A'awynn almost ran right into little Lacey. "Hi mama, can we go pick daffodils now? You promised we would later…and now it's later!" The jubilant child was jumping up and down; her blond curls bouncing unendingly and her hands folded as if in prayer. She jammed her eyes shut and pleaded with A'awynn. Her lips were moving, but the words were barely audible as she continued her ministrations. "Purdy please! Please, please, please! I'll be good…I'll be the bestest little girl in all the world…the universe…the bestest!"
A'awynn was having a hard time keeping a straight face. What could she possibly do when faced with such child-like beauty? She squatted down and pulled Lacey into a motherly hug, relishing the feel of her tiny body in her arms. "Yes Lacey, we will go pick daffodils…I have something I need to talk to you about…so you have to promise to listen, alright?" Lacey was staring intently at A'awynn as she spoke. Her big grey eyes focused on A'awynn and her little head was bobbing up and down in an affirmative motion.
Mother and daughter walked hand in hand, swinging their interlocked hands back and forth while skipping down the clean, albeit sparsely decorated hallway. They giggled and played catch-me-if-you-can as they ran the few yards to the daffodil field. This was the time that A'awynn loved the most, just her and Lacey being a family. Her heart ached to give this little girl what she lost so tragically and abruptly two years ago.
A'awynn remembered that night as if it were yesterday. She had just arrived in the small town that housed the orphanage and a handful of residents. There was a place of worship and a spattering of tiny shops and sidewalk peddlers, but the town was quaint and darling. It was just the haven that A'awynn was looking for. The priest had said that this was the perfect place for her to find the purpose that she so longed for. Losing her parents and James had left a terrible scar on her heart; and her Uncle Urien was not the guardian she would have wanted him to be. She just needed to get away.
She was no more that a few feet from the train station when she heard the rattling of a carriage that seemed to be in a big rush. Several locals were screaming for volunteers to ride about a mile up the road to the Hartford Family's home. Apparently, it was on fire and the family was trapped inside. A'awynn could not stop her hand from flying into the air and her feet scurrying as quickly as they could toward the carriage. She crawled halfway into the open back and was pulled the rest of the way up by many hands.
The carriage quickly continued its ramble toward the house. In her rush to volunteer, she had left her luggage setting on the street corner. She looked up in a panic and noticed a rather grandmotherly figure wave to her and indicate that her bags would be held for her in the building she pointed to. A'awynn felt certain that things would be just as she thought.
She placed her hand over her eyes to shield the sun and could see the line of smoke coming into view. It was a rolling black cloud as it ascended into the air from the house. She had surmised from the conversation, that there was a husband, wife and two little girls in the house. A'awynn prayed fervently that everyone had gotten out safely. She could see the concern on the faces of those with whom she rode. In a town this small, everyone knew everyone.
The house came into view and the billowing cloud of smoke told the whole story. The heat emanating off the building was overwhelming and the men jumped from the moving carriage before the horses came to a halt. Neighbors had already gathered and started the assembly line from the river to the house; buckets of water passed from person to person. The efforts were grandiose, but the results were minute.
A'awynn felt completely helpless as she stood at the side of the house, staring up at the shambles that was left of what had once been a happy home. She looked away as she was completely overwhelmed with tears. The tragic loss of this family was going to be hard for the small community to cope with. She looked back briefly and thought she saw movement in the upper left window. Chills ran up her spine, for she thought that perhaps it was an apparition. Then, she saw it again…it was very distinctly the figure of a small child desperately hanging half-way out the window as she was surrounded by smoke.
A'awynn ran desperately back to the front of the house, screaming to the others to help her; she had found a survivor! Everyone within hearing distance followed her to the side of the house. A blanket was placed about three feet off the ground as a square of men and women held the edges. They were all pleading for the little girl to jump. A'awynn could see the panic in her eyes and new that nothing said was sinking it. She asked the local ladies what the child's name was. Information in hand, she made her was to as close as she could to the house and looked up at the tiny girl.
"Lacey, honey; you have to jump onto the blanket. Your mommy told me that she wants you to come down from that window, and this is the only down." A'awynn used her most soothing and motherly voice to prod the child into action. She held her arms out, inviting Lacey to come into them by simply jumping. "If you jump really well for A'awynn…" A'awynn patted her chest with her hand, letting Lacey know that she was A'awynn. "…I will give you a special treat." A'awynn noticed that the child desperately gripped a wilted daffodil in her hand, "I will go pick more daffodils with you and we can make a beautiful bouquet of flowers together. Would you like that?"
Lacey shook her head vigorously and crawled up onto the windowsill. In one sweeping motion, she was through the window and bouncing on the blanket. A'awynn grasped the soot-covered child in her arms and clung to her for dear life. Tears washed the soot from A'awynn's face and little Lacey's face as they both allowed the sheer agony of the event to consume them. Lacey trembled in A'awynn's arms; it was at that moment A'awynn made an oath to herself and God that Lacey would never leave her side.
Picking daffodils together became a routine that solidified the relationship and gave mother and daughter quality time together. The orphanage had heard of the tragedy and arranged for A'awynn to become Lacey's mother as officially recognized by the church. Nothing was ever said of the fire that took the lives of her father, mother and older sister. Lacey chose to lock away those horrific memories in her mind. She had only just turned two at the time of the fire, so chances were, that she would never recall them.
A'awynn felt blessed to have been the chosen by God to take care of Lacey. This daughter that He had given her gave more purpose and meaning to her life than all the wealth in the world or any of the acts she could perform as a noblewoman. Her true identity as an aristocrat was under wraps at the orphanage. The sisters knew that she was the widow of the late Lord James Ellison Yancey, a wealthy lord whose money had helped develop and build the orphanage, but they were under strict orders to keep that knowledge to themselves.
Becoming one of the regular, everyday people had been so important to A'awynn. Even Lacey had no idea that she was a Little Lady, literally. A'awynn had told no one in Scotland accept Kaitlyn about Lacey. She wanted them all to be surprised. There were a great many similarities between the two; enough so, that many, who did not know any differently, assumed they were mother and daughter by blood.
It would really cause a stir among the nobles. Everyone knew that James had been dead for over five years and it was obvious that Lacey was barely four. It would certainly cause a bit of a ruckus in the ranks. It would also allow her to find a man worthy of being Lacey's father, a man who was not concerned with propriety, but wanted a family, this family. This man would not see a child born out of wedlock, but a child who was loved unconditionally and without remorse. A'awynn longed for such a man to sweep her off her feet. Wesley had definitely not been him; nor had any of the handfuls of other men A'awynn had courted over the years. Maybe, he did not exist.
"Look mama, I can barely hold them in my hand…there are so many of them!" Lacey's joyous voice lilted over to her and A'awynn was jolted out of her thoughts. The look of pure glee on her daughter's face lit up her world. A'awynn wrapped her arms around Lacey's small waist and merged her fingers together. She swung the small girl around and around until they were both so dizzy, that they softly fell into the bed of daffodils, laughing to their hearts content. This was her family, but how much better it would be to spend it with a special man.
"Lacey, I got a letter today from Kaitlyn in Scotland. Remember, I told you about her and her family?" Lacey nodded that she did remember and A'awynn continued, "She has asked that we return to Scotland and meet her brother Erik. He has been lost to them for almost thirty years."
Lacey crinkled up her nose and looked very concerned, "How can a person be lost for thirty years…did he not know his way home?"
A'awynn cocked her head sideways and smiled at Lacey, "No sweety, he was taken away from them when he was just about your age. A mean man took him and did horrible things to him; things that have left him scarred and hurting all these years."
Lacey bowed her head and seemed shaken from the story that A'awynn had told her. "Does he still hurt?" Lacey's innocent grey eyes were so filled with concern that A'awynn almost cried at the beauty of them.
She choked out her reply, "Yes Lacey, he carries scars on his body that will never go away. He wears a mask over the right side of his face because this mean man burned his face just to make Erik ugly." A'awynn hoped that Lacey understood the gravity of the situation. "We must not stare at him for that would be impolite; instead, let us try and be his friends, alright?"
Lacey smiled and gave A'awynn a priceless hug, "Of course mama, I want to be his friend. I want to be his special friend because I have scars too."
Lacey bounded off, running at top speed through the field of flowers. A'awynn could not help but let the tears fall, the scars on Lacey's back had never disappeared as the doctors had hoped they would. She would carry them for the rest of her life, living reminders to A'awynn of how close she had been to being lost in that fire. Lacey was under the impression that she had been born that way. A'awynn told her no differently.
Lacey had seemed eager to uproot and relocate to Scotland. She was young and resilient, two things that were quickly dissipating from A'awynn. She had seen a lot and lived an interesting life in her twenty-nine years. She was more than ready to take a step back and find the person with whom she could share her life.
June 1 came and A'awynn was once again on the train, this time bound for Scotland with Lacey by her side. The trip would be about 10 hours long with all the stops they had to make, but the time would fly. Lacey chit-chatted for the majority of the time, about this and that and everything. Everyone on the train fell in love with her and could not remember ever seeing a lovelier child. A'awynn glowed with motherly pride and pulled Lacey into her lap. They both took a nap, as the train lulled them on toward what would become the life they both had prayed for but never dreamed would actually become reality.
Chapter 23 preview – Coming Home.