We
sit down in the booth and I notice that B makes a huge effort to
sit
nowhere near me. What the hell is her problem now? B didn't say
anything to me this morning. I woke up and she wasn't in bed with
me.
I heard the water running in the bathroom so I figured she
was just
getting dressed so I didn't worry. But when Red came in
to tell us
that we were having breakfast at the diner down the
street, B barely
glanced at me and walked out of the room with
Red. Well, you know
what? Fuck her. God, I wish she had let me.
But all the same, fuck
her.
I scoot in next to Xander and
then Andrew comes in on my other side.
Dawn scoots in next to
him. Across from me are Giles, B, Red, and
Kennedy. Why is she
here?
"Why's the newbie here?" I ask, eyeing Kennedy
in that was that I
know makes people uncomfortable. The one where
they can't tell if I'm
checking them out or deciding how I'm
gonna kill them. "If I'd known
that fucking Red gets you an
automatic spot in the Scooby gang, I
woulda tried that my first
time around in Sunnydale." Yeah, I'm in a
bad mood. Don't
fuck with me. I pull my big, black sunglasses that I
stole from
one of the girls down on my face.
Both Red and Kenn open
their mouths to say something, more like bitch
me out, but Dawn
stops them before they can even start.
"So!" she
practically screeches, startling Andrew, who I've now
decided to
call Bitch Boy. "What does everyone want to eat?"
"Well,
I know what Kennedy wants to eat, right Red?" Ooh, I'm on a
roll this morning. I don't even know why I'm focusing so much on
Kennedy. Oh wait, yes I do. She annoys the fuck out of me. And
now,
after B's apparent rejection of me this morning, watching
Kenn and
Red act all couple-y is making me sick.
The
waitress comes over, seems to notice the tension, and hesitantly
asks to take our orders. I order my bad-mood breakfast, a black
coffee, and then sink down into my seat. I hate these people. I
hate
my life.
Giles clears his throat when the waitress is
gone to get everyone's
attention. "Alright, I've been
considering our options and I believe
I may have a plan that
suits everyone's interests. The girls in the
hospital, as well as
the girls with us, all wish to return to their
respective
families. A possibility is that we contact the families of
these
girls and ask them to come here. We leave each girl with a
number
to contact us. Once they've adjusted to their new powers, they
may
decide whether or not they wish to continue slaying with us or
remain living their normal lives."
"That sounds
a little cold, Giles," B says, shaking her head
slightly.
Yeah, she knows all about being cold. "Just dumping them
after
all that they've been through seems a little on the harsh
side."
"Buffy, I think it may be prudent for all
those involved to give
these girls back to their families. Allow
them to return home. These
girls will be cared for much more
sufficiently by their families than
they would be by us. We do
not have the time or the resources to give
proper care to each
individual girl. Or at least, not at this moment."
"What
exactly would the girls be joining later, Giles? What are we
gonna
be doing?" Xander asks. He looks completely worn out and
horrible. I can't imagine how he feels. I mean, I've lost my
share of
people I cared about, but never someone I was in love
with. If B
died, and really stayed dead, I'd probably kill
myself.
"I've decided that with so many girls becoming
slayers, we need to
locate them and help them to understand and
hopefully embrace their
calling. I know none of the details, but
when we get to Angel's hotel
we need to start planning. This
would be extremely difficult if we
are also taking care of all
these girls." Everyone nods in agreement.
"Does
everyone want to be a part of this?" Willow asks, giving me a
look.
"Well," Giles responds. "I would
assume that everyone wants to.
Please tell me, though, if you
don't wish to be a part of this."
Everyone remains silent
and all eyes are resting on me. All except B,
that is. OK, guess
I should say something now. "Sure, I wanna help.
One teeny
problem, though. I've got the cops on my ass. I'm an
escaped
convict. Remember?"
"No need to worry about that,
Faith. Once we access the Council's
funds, we should have enough
money and power to do some good old-
fashioned bribing."
Giles grins at me and I can't help but feel my
mood lift a little
bit. Damn, gotta fix this.
"So, Bitch Boy's coming too?" I ask, motioning over at Andrew.
"Faith, is that really
necessary?" Giles asks in a tone that pretty
much says he's
sick of my shit. "And to answer your question, yes,
Andrew
has decided to join us. I think he could be a useful member to
the
team, what with his extensive knowledge of languages and demons.
Now, all we need to do is talk to Robin."
We continue
the meal from hell with B not looking at me once and me
not
talking. I need a cigarette, so I climb over Andrew and Dawn
without
so much as a grunted excuse me' and go to the door. Once I
get
outside I dig around for my cigarettes and sit down on sidewalk
with
my back against the wall of the restaurant. I spend the rest of
the
meal outside smoking. I really want to maintain my pissed off
feeling and if I keep hanging in there it won't happen. The gang
distracts me and makes me temporarily forget about being pissed
at B,
directing my mind to thinking about the future and our
plans. The
group finally leaves the diner and after an hour of
getting
everything together, the entire lot of us, including all
the girls
(not that there's many of them here), climbs onto the
bus.
We drive to the hospital and the girls, Giles, and Red
all get off
the bus after parking it in the lot. So now we're
just sitting in the
parking lot. I doze off for a while and wake
up later to the sound of
shrill laughing. B's sitting in the
front with Dawnie, giggling and
acting way to happy for my
liking. God! She's not even slightly upset
that we're not
talking. Not that she should be too upset, considering
it was her
idea, but come on! Ok, I need to move on. She obviously
has. If B
wants to act like nothing happened then I will too. I look
at my
watch and realize that we've been sitting here for about 2
hours.
Man, this is dull.
Finally, about 30 minutes later, I feel
the bus rock, letting me know
that people are getting on. I look
up over the seat and see Giles and
Red helping Robin onto the
bus. What the hell? How is he out already?
He moves away from
them and slowly makes his way to the back of the
bus, where I'm
sitting. When he gets to my seat, he says, "Hey, mind
is a
handsome, not so mortally wounded man sits here?"
I don't
even answer. I just move out of the seat and help him sit
down.
After he gets adjusted I sit down next to him. Before I can ask
him
what the hell is going on, Giles yells to get our
attention.
"Alright, I talked with the girls and they've
all decided that they
want to stay at the hospital and wait for
their parents. People are
flying in from everywhere, so their
families should be here soon. The
hospital has agreed to allow
them to stay there for the time being.
We are now on our way to
Angel's hotel." He sits down and I look back
over at Robin.
"So, last time I checked, you'd been sliced up real
good, they had
you all up in morphine land, and recovery would be
goin on for a
while. Wanna tell me how you're on the bus the next
day? You could
barely even move yesterday."
Robin
lifts up his t-shirt and shows me the wound that is definitely
closed up. He has a wicked nice chest.
"Willow did a
spell. A healing spell or something that speeds up my
recovery.
In the last hour the wound closed and now it just hurts if
I move
it around too much. It'll probably be fully healed by the time
we
get to LA."
"That's awesome Robbie," I say,
deciding I'm gonna nickname him too.
OK, so I've got B, Red,
Dawnie, Kenn, Xanman, Bitch Boy, Robbie, and
G. That's everyone.
Something I've learned in life is that people
remember you if you
give them nicknames.
Robin smiles. "Robbie, I like that.
My mom used to call me that." OK,
I'm just gonna forget he
said that.
We sit in silence for a while, just looking out the
window. After
about half an hour, Robbie looks over at me and
asks, "So Faith, have
you thought about my offer? To give
you a surprise other than me
playing dead? I think we could have
something."
I look at him for a moment and consider my
options. On the one hand,
I've got B, who I don't actually have
at all. I could tell him no and
then have nobody when it becomes
official that B really doesn't want
me. I'm sick of having
nobody. On the other hand, I could try with
Robin and have an
actual relationship. Then, whatever B decides, I'll
have another
option. As if to further convince me, I hear B's cackle
again and
my mind is made up.
I grab Robin's face and plant a hot, wet
kiss on him. We break away
after a minute, him panting and me
barely out of breath.
"I guess that's a yes?" Robin
asks. I just grin and move so that I'm
leaning against him but
avoiding his injury. He puts his arm around
my stomach, and I
can't help remembering how B felt wrapped around
me. All I can do
right now is try to keep myself from crying. I pull
my big
sunglasses down on my face and pray that they disguise my
tears.
After
a couple of hours, we pull up at the Hyperion and suddenly, I'm
feeling pretty anxious. This is gonna be interesting. All of
these
people are gonna be together again and the intense clashing
that I
see coming probably isn't gonna be pretty. But you know
what? Fuck
everyone, cause I just wanna see Angel. It's amazing
how attached
I've gotten to him. Who would have thought years
ago, when I was
repeatedly trying to kill him, that I'd end up
thinking of him as my
big brother. We haven't gotten a chance
lately to catch up, so I'm
excited to talk to him again. If
anyone heard me think that, I'd die
of embarrassment.
I
help Robin out of his seat and down the steps of the bus. I'm
worried that even after Willow's healing spell, he could rip the
wound open again. Gotta be careful. I lead the group into the
hotel,
and I'm greeted by the sight of everyone's favorite green
demon.
"Faith!" Lorne yells. "I'm so glad
you're back, Gorgeous. The place
just hasn't been the same since
you left. And I really mean that.
Luckily, the spirit of Joan
Crawford has been banished from the
building, so we're safe from
the dangers of mommy dearest and her
under-aged boy-toy. So! This
is the Sunnydale crew. Be a doll, and
introduce us,
Sweetheart."
This guy cracks me up. Before I get a chance
to start the
introductions, Angel, Wes, Gunn, Fred, and the Kid
all come walking
out of the office. I don't think I know these
people enough to give
them names. I'll wait on that one. The only
one of that group that's
not brooding is Fred. She looks up and
sees Willow, immediately
walking over to her. "Willow, it's
so good to see you. Now we'll get
a chance to look at those texts
I was telling you about."
Red smiles at Fred, but then
Kennedy steps up like the little
fucktard she is, and says "Who
the hell is this?" God, I hate that
girl. If I was still
killing people, she'd be on my list. Whatever, I
can't pay
attention to those three. The Sunnydale crew is catching up
with
who they know from the LA crew, and I'm feeling kind of awkward
now.
I turn and try to find B, but I don't see her. Where the hell is
she? I turn my attention to Angel, who's giving me the most
bizarre
look. I have no clue what it means. He seems to snap out
of it though.
"Faith, I thought you were coming in a
couple days. What did I tell
you?" I'd be pissed, but he
says it with a smile, so I think he's
just playin with me.
"Hey, Big guy, how you been?"
"Oh, not
so great, but I don't want to bore you with the details
right
now. Let's introduce everyone. That's Fred over there, babbling
with
Willow. Basically, she's our version of Willow."
The
group looks over at the escalading fight between Kennedy, Fred,
and
Willow, and then we all look back over at Angel. "This is Gunn,
he's a great fighter and he's been with us for about three
years."
Gunn nods at the group, and then everyone turns to
Wesley. "You all
know Wes of course. And this is Connor,"
oh boy, "my son."
We're all quiet for a minute, and
then Buffy, who it seems has been
hiding out in the back, pushes
her way forward. Oh Lord, here we
go. "I'm sorry, your
WHAT?" B yells, in a pretty shrill voice.
Angel seems
lost for words. He's opening his mouth and then closing
it over
and over again. Gunn gets this And you are?' look on his
face
and looks at B, asking, "And who in the hell is this little
girl?"
"That's Buffy," Angel mutters,
looking off to the side. Gunn gets a
look of understanding on his
face.
"Oh, so you're THE Buffy. I thought you'd be taller."
B's too pissed at Angel to take much offense at
that, and just turns
back to him, with an expectant look on her
face.
"Connor's my, um-" Angel begins, but he's cut
off by the Junior
Brooder, himself.
"I'm Connor. I'm
the son of Angel and Darla. My birth was
prophesized. A baby
would be born of two vampires. Angel's greatest
enemy, Daniel
Holtz, who's family Angel slaughtered hundreds of years
ago, had
himself preserved so that he could take vengeance in the
future.
Holtz took me to the dimension Quor-Toth when I was a baby.
Time
moves differently there, so when I returned I was 17 years old."
Connor finishes and looks around at the group with a disgusted
look
on his face. He pushes through the group and leaps onto the
second
floor railing, and then disappears. Fucking show off.
Giles is wicked interested though, so he clears his throat
and
says, "If it would be quite alright, I'd really love to
discuss
Connor's origins with you later. It's quite astonishing,
a baby from
two vampires."
Angel nods his head and
says to the two people who don't know, "Oh,
this is Giles,
he's Buffy's watcher."
Angel finishes introducing
everyone and now we're all kind of
standing around. Wesley then
says, "Sorry to ask you all this, but
we're in the middle of
researching a demon that's come to LA and we
could really use all
the help we can get. Would the group of you mind
too much helping
us out?" Man, even as badass as he's gotten, he's
still such
a watcher.
As the group starts moving over to where all the
research stuff is,
something suddenly occurs to me. "Hey
Angel, where the hell is Queen
C?"
We've
been researching for about an hour now and I'm trying my
damndest
to not fall asleep. I wish I could go up to my room. Angel
let us
settle in before we started researching. I'm also still
having
trouble believing the story Angel told us earlier. After I
asked
him about Cordelia, he told us that she's in a coma. Apparently
she
was evil when I was here. Some devil baby had planted itself in
her
and was making her do shit. When Red and I left, Team Angel found
out and was able to kill the demon. Put Cordy in a coma though.
She's
up in one of the rooms, I think. Oh, grossest part is that
Connor was
the one who knocked her up. We really do live in some
twisted soap
opera.
We're all sitting quietly when I feel
Robin put his arm around me on
the couch we're sitting on. He
leans over and kisses my cheek, and I
feel myself turning a
little red. This is fucking embarrassing.
B clears her throat
and then looks over at Wesley. "So, Wes, this
look is new.
And you seem a lot less uptight. What's been going on
with
you?"
Some people look awkward and Angel says, "Um,
Buffy, maybe that's not
the best topic."
"No,
it's alright Angel," Wes says. "Buffy, I've had many
different
experiences in the last few years. Being tortured,
shot, and fighting
nightly against demons has definitely changed
me. However, I think
the biggest change came from when I
kidnapped Connor as a baby in an
effort to prevent a prophecy and
inadvertently delivered him to
Holtz. My throat was sliced by a
woman named Justine and I was exiled
from Angel Investigations.
After that I kept Justine locked in my
closet for months, began
literally sleeping with the enemy, and
resumed my job as a rogue
demon hunter. Only really, this time. I
guess you could say those
things have shaped me, somewhat."
Ok, that was quite a
story. I knew Wes was fucked up, but I didn't
know he was that
fucked up. Good to know it wasn't me that made him
this way. B
looks kind of shocked and everyone's just staring at Wes.
Well,
actually, the LA crew is just kind of looking off to the side
and
trying not to look at Wes.
Fred breaks the tension when she asks, "So, who wants pizza!"
She gets up to go
over to the phone and we all look back down at out
books. Once
again, I feel Robin touching me, only this time he's
playing with
my hair. I swear to God, it's like he's pissing on me to
let
everyone know I'm his.
"Faith, can I talk to you for a
minute?" Angel suddenly asks. He gets
up without waiting for
an answer and walks to his office. I knock
Robin's hand off of me
and follow Angel.
We walk into his office and I flop myself
down in the chair across
from his desk. Angel leans against the
desk, crosses his arms, and
then just stares at me. That brooding
stare that makes me notice how
huge his brow is. Damn, how did I
not see that before?
I'm sitting here, still thinking about
Angel's forehead when he
suddenly says, "So, anything you
wanna tell me, Faith?"
"Uh, no?" Oh God, he
doesn't know, does he? Fuck. Now he's gonna
disown me or some
shit. How the fuck does he know? Can he smell it?
It was fucking
hours ago. And we didn't even have actual sex.
"Are you
sure about that? No new…developments?" He's got this grin on
his face now that reminds me of that fucker Angelus. This is not
good. He just keeps looking at me and I know the jig is
up.
"Fine, you know about me and B, don't you?" I
give up. Whatever, if
he doesn't like it, he can go fuck himself.
It's not like B even
wants to continue this thing with me anyway.
"I kind of figured it out. Your smells are on each other
and Buffy's
been staring at you for the last hour. Can't say I'm
not surprised,
though. I could have been sure Buffy only liked
vamps."
He's grinning, and I suddenly feel relieved. OK,
I admit it. No
matter how indifferent I act, I really do want his
approval. Angel's
the only person who didn't give up on me so I
know I can trust both
him and his judgment. If he's disappointed
in me, I know I really
have fucked up.
"So you're
five by five with this Angel? I mean, not that I think
there's
anything with us anymore, but I really don't want you to not
be
OK with this."
Angel sighs and says, "Faith, I
realized a long time ago that I
wasn't what Buffy needed to make
her happy. I couldn't offer her a
future. I learned to move on.
That doesn't mean that I want her with
other people, though. But
if I have to choose between you, the farm
boy, or, God help me,
Spike, I would choose you a million times." OK,
that's good
enough for me. "But there's one thing I want to tell you,
Faith. Buffy's been hurt too many times, and unfortunately, after
me,
you're the person that has hurt her the most. The only reason
I was
able to hurt her more was because she loved me. So now-"
I
cut him off at that. "Angel, she's not in love with me. Trust
me, I
may love her, but the feeling is definitely not returned.
She said
she doesn't even know how she feels about me."
"Faith,
I knew back in Sunnydale that the relationship between you
two
was special. There was such a connection and such passion that
I'm
embarrassed now that I never saw the potential. You know how they
say there's a thin line between love and hate?" I chuckle.
Man, we
think alike. "I think Buffy's crossed that line and
she doesn't
realize it. Just because she doesn't say what she's
feeling, Faith,
doesn't mean it's not there. What I'm trying to
say is, be careful. I
don't want to see her hurt. I don't want to
see you hurt."
Man, I'm touched. I smile at him and get
up from the chair. He starts
to move to me and I quickly realize
that he wants to hug. "Dude,
don't you remember? We don't
hug. Just nod your head at me and maybe
give a shoulder punch.
That's it. Hugs would be wicked awkward."
Angel smiles and
punches me on the shoulder.
When we walk out of the office
everyone looks up but quickly goes
back to their research. Angel
was right. B's definitely staring at
me. But now, it's looking
more like a glare than a stare.
I start moving back to my
chair next to Robin when B snaps, "Wow,
Faith. You don't
waste any time. You get a new guy the second you go
Sunnydale and
you don't even wait five minutes in LA to start fucking
around
with Angel again. I'm impressed."
I just look at her
for, like, a minute straight without blinking.
What the fuck is
she on? B's kind of looking off to the side now like
she's
uncomfortable. Oh fucking well.
"B, a word please,"
I say, motioning my head to the staircase. She
gets out of her
chair, shoving it back, and then stomps over to the
stairs. I
follow behind her, ignoring the curious looks we're getting
from
the group.
I
walk behind Buffy up the stairs and try not to stare at her amazing
ass. It's harder than it sounds. Really fucking hard. She goes up
to
my room, which I didn't even know she knew how to find. I also
can't
help but feel happy about this. She put the effort into
finding my
room and going there shows that she feels comfortable
in my space. Or
maybe she just doesn't want me in her room.
I
close the door behind me and turn around. B's glaring at me. "Do
you want to tell me what the fuck that was?" I ask.
"I'll
tell you exactly what the fuck that was. That was me being
fucking
upset with you."
"Yeah, I figured that one out all
on my own, B. What I want to know
is why you're pissed. You've
ignored me all fucking day. I'm the one
who should be pissed at
you. In fact, I am pissed at you."
"OK, number one,
the only reason I didn't talk to you today was
because I didn't
want to draw any attention to us and get anyone
suspicious.
Number two, you want to know why I'm pissed? How about
the fact
that you and I are together, and yet you've gone back to
being a
whore and cheating on me with Principal Wood. That enough of
a
reason, Faith?" Buffy spits out my name like it's dirty. Jesus.
Is
she crazy?
"Um, let's get one thing straight, B.
Call me a whore again and we're
gonna have a serious fucking
problem. I don't need that kind of shit,
and especially not from
you. Now, let me remind you, we're not
together. Remember? You
don't want to tell anyone about us. You don't
even know what this
thing between us is. So until you can figure out
what the fuck
you want, I don't owe you a fucking thing. I'll
continue
exploring this thing with us in secret if you want me to. I
love
you B. I'll take you any way I can. If you told me right now
that
you loved me and wanted to be with me, I'd drop Robin before you
could even finish your sentence. But this thing with us isn't for
sure. That's the problem. I don't want to fully devote myself to
you
and then you to decide in a couple weeks that you don't
really like
me that way. Then I'd be left with nobody. Do you see
where I'm
coming from?"
B sighs and sits down on the
bed, dropping her head in her hands.
Though her voice if muffled,
I can make out her saying, "Yeah, you're
right. I'm being
unreasonable. I'm sorry." She looks up at me and
adds,
"Forgive me, Faith. I do want to continue this thing with us. I
like you a lot, and I want to see what's between us. Could you
just
do me a favor though? Don't be too romantic with him around
me?"
I don't start jumping around the room when I realize
how jealous she
really is. See? I have self control. I smile and
move over to the bed
to sit next to B. I put my arm around her
and she leans into me,
resting her head on my shoulder. I stroke
her hair as I
say, "Alright, B, I can do that. I'll try to
be more considerate.
Will you do me a favor, also? Don't ignore
me. It hurts me and I
think that it just calls more attention to
us. Now, don't be upset
anymore, OK?"
B smiles
slightly at me and nods her head. Then she moves forward,
pressing
her lips against mine. I don't think I'll ever get tired of
this.
Of feeling her soft lips stroking mine, B kisses me in a way
that
feels like she's worshipping me. Like she wants to make me feel
good. That's a first. I've always been kissed like the person
wanted
something from me. With B, though, it's like the kissing
is the
treat. Unfortunately, I remember the people waiting
downstairs. If we
don't come down soon, someone will probably
come up looking for us. I
pull back, but B's still sucking on my
bottom lip. I somehow manage
to move my mouth away from hers and
break our amazing makeup kiss.
Buffy whispers in the cutest
voice, "Why are you stopping? I want
more kisses."
"Sorry
B," I say, getting up. "We got people waiting. There's
research to be done. Come on, let's go." I hold my hand out
to B and
she takes it. We leave the room and start walking down
the stairs,
resigning ourselves to hours of dull-as-shit
research. Maybe I'll
just daydream about B. Better yet, I'll
start planning a way to get B
to give up the prissy act and fuck
me. Yeah, that's it. Maybe this
research party won't be so bad.
