You asked for it, and you're gonna get it! It's time for part two of…

The Shinobi's Guide to Voodoo

By Kaori

"So what do you plan to do?" Naruto asked. He'd just finished telling Neji what he and Kiba had just done. Kiba was looking at the blonde like he'd gone insane, while the Hyuuga seemed pensive.

"Let me be sure I've got this right. You," he pointed at Naruto. "bought a home voodoo kit in order to exact your revenge on Uchiha Sasuke for whatever it is he's done to you. You," he pointed at Kiba. "are his accomplice. The two of you decided to test the kit on Shikamaru which would explain why he was spouting nonsense in his underclothes."

"That's about the size of it."

"One question. Why Shikamaru?"

"Why not?" Naruto shrugged, grinning. "So, are you going to turn us in?" A slow, devious smile made its way across Neji's face.

"Actually, there's something I'd like you to do..."

Team Gai was meeting in their usual training area. Well, actually Gai, Lee, and TenTen were waiting for Neji.

"What is taking him so long?" TenTen wondered aloud. "It's not like Neji to be late."

"That's right!" the ever-enthusiastic Lee agreed. "Although his youthful flames don't burn as bright as mine, he is usually a blazing example of timeliness!"

"Fret not my students! I'm sure he will be here any moment now!" Gai boomed. "You see! There he is now!"

Neji was walking towards them at a sedate pace, casually eyeing his surroundings.

"Neji my rival, why are you so late on this most beautiful day!" Lee demanded. TenTen rubbed her temple in annoyance. Neji shrugged.

"The reason for my lateness is none of your concern. It is a Hyuuga matter and that is all I have to say." Lee of course was not satisfied with this answer and decided that if he could not get Neji to tell him more then he would run six thousand laps around Konoha while carrying Team 8 on his back.

Meanwhile, Kiba and Naruto were trying very hard not to be seen as they snuck around in the undergrowth. "I still can't believe we're doing this." Kiba muttered.

"Ssh!" Naruto hissed. "Do you want Neji to kick your ass if you get caught?"

"What do you mean if I get caught?" Kiba had no doubt that Neji would kick his ass but he resented the implication that his shinobi skills were so mediocre that he'd be caught.

"I'm much better at getting away with stuff than you are. Now shut up and hand me that piece of cloth Neji gave us." Naruto said as he took out the voodoo doll.

The doll itself wasn't much to look at just a simple straw doll with no distinguishing features besides being human-shaped. Kiba handed Naruto a piece of green cloth and the blonde boy wrapped it around the doll.

"All right my students," Gai beamed. "now that Neji is here we can begin ." he suddenly stopped speaking.

"Gai-sensei?" Lee ventured. "Are you feeling all right?"

Gai seemed to snap out of whatever it was and smiled placidly. "I feel fine great! We must go and collect today's mission!" He gave them all a thumbs up and took off running for the Hokage Tower, his team right behind. A few seconds later, Naruto and Kiba followed.

Today was like any other day; clients coming in and out of the tower and the staff rushing about carrying scrolls. Gai scanned the room and nodded absently in approval of the sight. Despite the attack by Oto and Suna, Konoha was still getting a lot of clients. He suddenly spotted Kakashi out of the corner of his eye and immediately bounded over to issue his usual challenge.

"Kakashi my eternal riv-AAAGH!" Gai suddenly tripped and landed face first on the floor. Lee was horrified, TenTen was confused, and Neji was outwardly unperturbed (inside he was chortling). Kakashi, who was still preoccupied with thoughts of revenge, missed the scene entirely (a shame really) and continued on his way.

"Gai-sensei! What happened! Are you all right!" cried Lee. Immediately rushing to his sensei's side.

"I am not sure my fiery student but you needn't be concerned for my health." He got up and did the "nice guy" pose. "See, I'm perfectly OK."

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"LeeAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHH!" The love-fest that is Gai and Lee hugging was immediately cut short by Gai suddenly being slammed into a nearby wall. Lee was once again horrified but had TenTen for company in this respect. Neji, was glancing at a row of potted plants and trying very hard not to smirk. If he activated his Byakugan right now he was certain he'd see Naruto, Kiba and Akamaru, and their Voodoo Gai.

"Gai-sensei!" Lee wailed and once again rushed to his sensei's side.

"I'm okay." Gai said dazedly. What just happened? First he'd tripped while trying to greet his rival, then he'd been flung into a wall when he was about to hug his oh so youthful student. He suddenly heard a voice in his head.

"Maito Gai."

"Who said that?" Gai asked out loud.

"I did." The voice, replied.

"Oh. And you are?"

"Just a friend."

"I see."

"Gai-sensei?" Lee asked. "Who are you talking to?"

"Just this voice on my head. It's being very vague at the moment." Replied Gai.

TenTen and Lee looked at each other and Neji struggled to contain himself.

"And just how long have you been hearing this voice, Gai-sensei?" TenTen inquired.

"About three minutes now."

"I see. Lee, grab a leg. It's the rest home for you Gai-sensei."

"But TenTen-san, is that really necessary?" Lee pouted, not wanting to see his beloved teacher carted off to the nut house.

"He's hearing voices Lee." Neji said, inwardly congratulating himself for not snickering. "The rest home will only keep him until he stops hearing them."

"But.but."

While TenTen and Neji tried to convince Lee that having Gai temporarily institutionalised was for his own good, said jounin was discussing taijutsu training and spandex with the voice in his head.

Behind the potted plants, Kiba was holding up the other end of the conversation while Naruto was trying not to laugh too loudly.

".and it's just not right." Kiba spoke to the doll. "You are...ummm.squelching their youth by forcing your views on them. Youth is about freedom! FREEEEDOOOOMMMM!"

"I think...heheheh….that's enough…hmmhmmm….Kiba!" Naruto said putting a hand on his shoulder. "Neji's signalling for us to knock it off."

"Feh, and just when I was really getting into it."

"Shouldn't you be a bit more weirded out that you could hear Gai's thoughts in your head?"

"It's no worse than being weirded out by him in general."

"I see." hummed Naruto. "I'm getting hungry, let's get something to eat."

Who will the Devious Duo voodoo next? Will Kakashi get his revenge? And why am I asking you guys? Stay tuned for more of The Shinobi's Guide to Voodoo!