His Fiona

Summary: Something I had to write because, like Adam, I'm in denial over Fiona's death.
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters…if I did we'd still have Tom, Zoë, Danny and Fiona!

Fiona Carter.

Carter. His name.

His Fi.

Dead.

File closed.

The incredible ride was over.

Farook had taken her. She had been Farook's once and Adam had rescued her. Now Farook had stolen her away from him.

How ironic. How fucking symmetrical.

Why?

He knew why. He knew better than to think about it. It was the service. Their job.

But why now? They'd survived 6 together, why not 5?

Other people were killed, not them.

Not Fiona. Never Fiona.

Not his Fi.

If only he could have got there quicker, reacted faster, shot Farook before he pulled the trigger, releasing that jealous, fateful bullet.

He watched her run towards him and it was the most beautiful sight on earth.

He saw her flinch, stumble, fall, and it was terrible.

Beautifully terrible. Terribly beautiful.

He couldn't comprehend what he was seeing. It was instinct that was sending the bullets from his gun into Farook's chest. To his heart.

Not that he had one.

A cold, hard stone perhaps. A rotten core, decayed away with jealousy and the desire for revenge. He'd killed his wife…ex-wife, because he couldn't have her. Because she no longer loved him, now hated him. And she was running towards the man she did love.

Him. Adam.

Not Farook.

That damn symmetry again. The perfect target between the two men who loved her.

She was running to him. To him. He was meant to save her, cover her, like every other time. But this time he didn't make it. He failed and now she was gone.

Harry said you didn't make 'friends' in the service, only 'colleagues you would die for', so where did he and Fiona fit?

His wife. His love. And he would die for her, a thousand times over. But he hadn't been able to. She'd kept all this from him. Protecting him, trying to save him. And not saving herself. And now she was dead.

In a world where you were never yourself she knew him better than she did. Love and lies coexisted somehow. Every single person Adam Carter ever was loved Fiona Carter. Every cover, every disguise, ever identity, every character, every role he'd assumed, every part he'd played, every man he'd ever been and ever would be loved her. Even when he didn't know who he was, he knew he loved her.

That's how he knew he didn't lie about that.

And every one of those people was hurting, grieving.

They all felt guilty.

They were all in denial.

They missed her.

They loved her.

Inside they were all screaming, crying, lying to themselves.

Every single version of Adam Carter was lost without her.

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I usually only write OC fiction so this was a new venture. I almost wrote when Zoë left because I was so upset about that too lol but I got over it without writing lol! I scribbled this down last night so it's rather rough and it could be a lot longer and deeper but I don't really have time. R.I.P Fiona and please leave a review people!