Chapter 13
Am I traumatized by something? Or did I really see what I just saw? Or are these illusions? Am I really only on the Farplane?
Auron sat in the cockpit of the Celsius next to Brother, in the comfortable leather seat that usually served as Rikku's post during flights. He had his hands stiffly held in his lap and his coat collar pulled up as high as it would reach, which right now was up to his bottom eyelids. Every now and then he'd adjust the collar, adjust his glasses, and let some air into his coat collar when it became harder to breathe.
When was the last time he blushed? And especially like this? He pondered it for a good twenty or so minutes, after moving up to the cockpit in haste. It was a feeling that came from both the sight that could have killed him all over again, and the fact that he hadn't felt this way about anyone before. In his youth, he had no luck at all with women-in fact, he never tried. At twenty-five he joined up with Lord Braska on the pilgrimage and died in Zanarkand, then after ten years of struggling to "survive" in Zanarkand he looked after Tidus and then joined up with Yuna. He'd never had time, ever. Even before the first pilgrimage with Braska, he was a monk and he was so caught up in studies. At the time he felt like he may as well have forgotten about marriage, about women... because no such opportunities ever came along. With a history like this, there wasn't much he could do at all except what he actually did, which was burning with a shame he didn't understand, in the same seat and same position for twenty minutes.
Running the scene through his mind made it worse.
He had been walking out of the elevator holding another brandy glass and feeling so refreshed, so good about himself, reacquainting himself with the smaller, fainter pleasures of life, with his head held high again and bearing a powerful stride. Brother and Buddy nodded to him almost in approval of his healthy spirit, and the tall former guardian stood before the blue globe-sphere and enjoyed the exhilarating view from the front.
Feeling the rush of the Celsius in full movement, in a sort of blast, it almost felt like he was still a hologram on the Farplane, and that the slightest sensations could flood straight through his body again. Except on the Farplane, his own mass of pyreflies had been gentle like flower petals, and after awhile, kind of annoying. A few times he shut his eyes to imagine flying, speeding away into the kind of oblivion that welcomed him in dreams when he was younger, to understand that this was another chapter of his life he'd missed out on earlier, and that there were unknown frontiers awaiting him even now. Arriving at their destination, the nose of the Celsius began to tip downward slowly, and maybe, just maybe, he might consider going out onto the deck after all. With Rikku, too. He'd apologize, laugh with her, scoop her up into his arms again and carry her out on deck--
It was easier imagined than even said, much less executed. Auron let his body jerk forward a bit as Brother recklessly made a clumsy attempt at a landing. With much creaking and deep humming that came with large machinery, Brother raised the entrance to the Celsius and the three women, the famous "YRP" which they called themselves, padded up the ramp in bare feet and dripping all over the place.
"Don't worry, Brother, I'll clean it up!" Yuna hollered, her long legs carrying her swiftly, her hair hanging straight and touching the back of her neck, wrapped in a pink towel.
"Be careful not slip and fall, Sir Auron," Paine nodded to the oldest in the group before chasing Yuna's heels and nearly knocking Tidus over when she reached the overlook of the bridge, for he'd tried to stop them so that he could catch a glimpse of Yuna.
"Brother! Fa yna kuehk du Bevelle huf[We're going to Bevelle now]--" Rikku emitted before she gasped at the sight of Auron standing behind her brother's chair. She was dripping wet, wearing only a towel underneath her swimsuit, with her soaking hair thrown back sloppily and supported by a blue headband that would peel down over her eyes in any minute. Her mouth hung wide open in shock.
Auron wanted to say or do something to make her feel more comfortable about being in front of him like that. He attempted a light shrug, but he came out looking rather perplexed. Rikku blushed crimson and darted off, nearly slipping in a puddle of water.
It wasn't like he really wanted to... or maybe he did... but he remembered all of it so clearly now. She looked like a water nymph of some sort, with her beautiful, long, tan legs bared to his sight, and traces of a low-cut yellow bikini bottom flashing beneath the towel when she moved. Only then did she look like the purest maiden, shimmering with more innocence than Yuna had when she was Rikku's age. Her lips were damp and full, and beads of water hung onto her long eyelashes. The more he saw her as innocent and sexy without meaning to be, the more dirty he felt about himself. Seeing how much Yuna's youngest guardian had changed over these past two years was a pleasing torture. And his accidentally showing that he was mind-blown set her off running like an elusive little fawn.
How would he face her now? It was the next worsest thing to catching near naked--which was a sight that would kill him all over again, and if that happened, he wouldn't dare come back to see anyone. Being dead and on the Farplane wouldn't be enough to erase the scarring of his mind as long as Rikku still knew who he was. Now that he thought of that, if he did happen to see that... he could "die" a happy man....
A man with darker and curlier hair and in goggles swerved around and flashed Auron a bright white smile. He was more tanned than even Rikku. "Hey, Sir Auron," Buddy called him without the Al Bhed accent Auron expected, waving his hand and beckoning for him to come forward. "Good to have you aboard. There's something you might want to see in just a minute." Auron drew up his composure again and walked, though his knees buckled and his legs shook nervously from the Rikku experience, to the smaller leather chair to the left of Brother's. "What's up?" Buddy held up his gloved index finger. "Ou[Yo], Shinra! Tet oui vehecr dra haf tnaccbrana[Did you finish the new dressphere]?" "I think she has it now," came a very young voice that seemed to be coming through an intercom. The chair in front of the control center against the right wall spun to reveal a small individual in a full-body suit and a helmet that looked like a gas mask. "Wanna see?" the individual turned to Auron. "I... don't understand," Auron told the boy, unsure of where to look because he couldn't see his eyes or his face... or any bit of skin on him, for that matter. Shinra was the first Al Bhed child Auron had ever seen, in all his years in Spira. Did they all dress that way, especially in the heat of the Sanubia Desert where they used to live? Looking at Shinra just now, Auron only hoped there was some sort of cooling system inside his suit. Maybe Shinra had a disease of some sort. He didn't want to ask. "You'll see," the boy told him in an intriguing tone. "Go to the cabin. She'll be waiting there." Auron almost forgot to ask, "'She' who?", then remembered to walk casually as if they were talking about Yuna and not Rikku. "Wait!!" Shinra called suddenly. "Um... there is one more thing I can do... before you go in there."
Am I traumatized by something? Or did I really see what I just saw? Or are these illusions? Am I really only on the Farplane?
Auron sat in the cockpit of the Celsius next to Brother, in the comfortable leather seat that usually served as Rikku's post during flights. He had his hands stiffly held in his lap and his coat collar pulled up as high as it would reach, which right now was up to his bottom eyelids. Every now and then he'd adjust the collar, adjust his glasses, and let some air into his coat collar when it became harder to breathe.
When was the last time he blushed? And especially like this? He pondered it for a good twenty or so minutes, after moving up to the cockpit in haste. It was a feeling that came from both the sight that could have killed him all over again, and the fact that he hadn't felt this way about anyone before. In his youth, he had no luck at all with women-in fact, he never tried. At twenty-five he joined up with Lord Braska on the pilgrimage and died in Zanarkand, then after ten years of struggling to "survive" in Zanarkand he looked after Tidus and then joined up with Yuna. He'd never had time, ever. Even before the first pilgrimage with Braska, he was a monk and he was so caught up in studies. At the time he felt like he may as well have forgotten about marriage, about women... because no such opportunities ever came along. With a history like this, there wasn't much he could do at all except what he actually did, which was burning with a shame he didn't understand, in the same seat and same position for twenty minutes.
Running the scene through his mind made it worse.
He had been walking out of the elevator holding another brandy glass and feeling so refreshed, so good about himself, reacquainting himself with the smaller, fainter pleasures of life, with his head held high again and bearing a powerful stride. Brother and Buddy nodded to him almost in approval of his healthy spirit, and the tall former guardian stood before the blue globe-sphere and enjoyed the exhilarating view from the front.
Feeling the rush of the Celsius in full movement, in a sort of blast, it almost felt like he was still a hologram on the Farplane, and that the slightest sensations could flood straight through his body again. Except on the Farplane, his own mass of pyreflies had been gentle like flower petals, and after awhile, kind of annoying. A few times he shut his eyes to imagine flying, speeding away into the kind of oblivion that welcomed him in dreams when he was younger, to understand that this was another chapter of his life he'd missed out on earlier, and that there were unknown frontiers awaiting him even now. Arriving at their destination, the nose of the Celsius began to tip downward slowly, and maybe, just maybe, he might consider going out onto the deck after all. With Rikku, too. He'd apologize, laugh with her, scoop her up into his arms again and carry her out on deck--
It was easier imagined than even said, much less executed. Auron let his body jerk forward a bit as Brother recklessly made a clumsy attempt at a landing. With much creaking and deep humming that came with large machinery, Brother raised the entrance to the Celsius and the three women, the famous "YRP" which they called themselves, padded up the ramp in bare feet and dripping all over the place.
"Don't worry, Brother, I'll clean it up!" Yuna hollered, her long legs carrying her swiftly, her hair hanging straight and touching the back of her neck, wrapped in a pink towel.
"Be careful not slip and fall, Sir Auron," Paine nodded to the oldest in the group before chasing Yuna's heels and nearly knocking Tidus over when she reached the overlook of the bridge, for he'd tried to stop them so that he could catch a glimpse of Yuna.
"Brother! Fa yna kuehk du Bevelle huf[We're going to Bevelle now]--" Rikku emitted before she gasped at the sight of Auron standing behind her brother's chair. She was dripping wet, wearing only a towel underneath her swimsuit, with her soaking hair thrown back sloppily and supported by a blue headband that would peel down over her eyes in any minute. Her mouth hung wide open in shock.
Auron wanted to say or do something to make her feel more comfortable about being in front of him like that. He attempted a light shrug, but he came out looking rather perplexed. Rikku blushed crimson and darted off, nearly slipping in a puddle of water.
It wasn't like he really wanted to... or maybe he did... but he remembered all of it so clearly now. She looked like a water nymph of some sort, with her beautiful, long, tan legs bared to his sight, and traces of a low-cut yellow bikini bottom flashing beneath the towel when she moved. Only then did she look like the purest maiden, shimmering with more innocence than Yuna had when she was Rikku's age. Her lips were damp and full, and beads of water hung onto her long eyelashes. The more he saw her as innocent and sexy without meaning to be, the more dirty he felt about himself. Seeing how much Yuna's youngest guardian had changed over these past two years was a pleasing torture. And his accidentally showing that he was mind-blown set her off running like an elusive little fawn.
How would he face her now? It was the next worsest thing to catching near naked--which was a sight that would kill him all over again, and if that happened, he wouldn't dare come back to see anyone. Being dead and on the Farplane wouldn't be enough to erase the scarring of his mind as long as Rikku still knew who he was. Now that he thought of that, if he did happen to see that... he could "die" a happy man....
A man with darker and curlier hair and in goggles swerved around and flashed Auron a bright white smile. He was more tanned than even Rikku. "Hey, Sir Auron," Buddy called him without the Al Bhed accent Auron expected, waving his hand and beckoning for him to come forward. "Good to have you aboard. There's something you might want to see in just a minute." Auron drew up his composure again and walked, though his knees buckled and his legs shook nervously from the Rikku experience, to the smaller leather chair to the left of Brother's. "What's up?" Buddy held up his gloved index finger. "Ou[Yo], Shinra! Tet oui vehecr dra haf tnaccbrana[Did you finish the new dressphere]?" "I think she has it now," came a very young voice that seemed to be coming through an intercom. The chair in front of the control center against the right wall spun to reveal a small individual in a full-body suit and a helmet that looked like a gas mask. "Wanna see?" the individual turned to Auron. "I... don't understand," Auron told the boy, unsure of where to look because he couldn't see his eyes or his face... or any bit of skin on him, for that matter. Shinra was the first Al Bhed child Auron had ever seen, in all his years in Spira. Did they all dress that way, especially in the heat of the Sanubia Desert where they used to live? Looking at Shinra just now, Auron only hoped there was some sort of cooling system inside his suit. Maybe Shinra had a disease of some sort. He didn't want to ask. "You'll see," the boy told him in an intriguing tone. "Go to the cabin. She'll be waiting there." Auron almost forgot to ask, "'She' who?", then remembered to walk casually as if they were talking about Yuna and not Rikku. "Wait!!" Shinra called suddenly. "Um... there is one more thing I can do... before you go in there."