Chapter 19
"Rikku? Rikku!!!!" Auron yelled, carrying his jacket draped over his arm and searching frantically for the distraught little Al Bhed.
What the hell have I done?!? I'm not done yet, not now that I've come this far. I've got to tell her.... I've got to figure something out. This can't happen.
"Rikku, I'm sorry, I'm so damn sorry. Please, forget everything I said, just come out here. Please believe me-I'd fight off everything if it meant I could stay with you longer...."
Auron walked alone in the darkness, with the waters of the Moonflow reaching up to his ankles. He shook his fists by his side and stamped into the wet sand.
"DAMN IT!!!!!!" Looking every which way, she was still nowhere in sight. No lights were on inside the Celsius, and he'd already looked for her among the crowd. His eyes ached for a flash of shimmering emerald-jade green and any trace of long, golden hair hanging straight down.... When he felt like both of them were lost in this ridiculous ocean of loud colors and music, he trudged his way toward the end of the banks, fuming at himself.
For awhile he thought maybe things were supposed to end this way. Maybe it was easier, less complicated on everyone's lives, if he and Rikku existed in separation.
That's right, shouldn't you know by now that it wasn't meant to be? Auron asked himself. Not only are you about twice her age, but you're also walking Spira as an unsent. You have no reason to be here.
"Well, then, get me out of here!!!" Auron shouted into the air, as if a force would bring him back to the Farplane. Not like it would work, of course. Not while he still looked twenty-five.
"The Celsius is that way, you know," Rikku's voice reached him from somewhere he couldn't see. He looked all about him.
"No, not that way! THAT way!!"
Auron turned around and looked up, seeing Rikku sitting in the passengers' area aboard a sleeping shoopuf. Moonlight sluiced all around her silhouette and he had to squint to see her.
"What are you doing up there? You had me worried, running off like that! Women, I swear..." Auron ran up to the mint-green, elephant-like creature with very short ears. Its curling proboscis rested in the water, and the shoopuf didn't seem to mind Rikku up on its back.
"Coming down any minute soon?" Auron called up to her.
"I don't know," Rikku told him, standing up and leaning against a pole that supported the canopy hanging over the passengers' area.
"Look, I'm sorry I upset you. I'm willing to take all that back if you come down."
"Why don't you come up here?"
"Fine." Auron walked around the shoopuf's massive body and Rikku threw a rope ladder down at him from its pillar-like hind leg. Auron made his way up and seated himself on a cushioned bench adjacent to Rikku. "Now, why are we up here?"
"I don't know, really. I thought I might enjoy the view from here. It's a great distraction." Rikku's eyes didn't meet his just yet.
"Rikku... will you forgive me for saying that? And if not, are you able to forget?"
"...Okay." She sat back down, across from him, and the moment she did so, he got out of his seat and knelt at her knees. Rikku folded her gloved hands nervously in her lap, until Auron took one of her hands in his, and gazed into her eyes.
"Let me rephrase everything. I've never known a better joy than being with you tonight even while I was still living-"
"...Auron..."
In the mellowed background, which was still hard to drown out, Rikku heard Yuna announce her final song coming on. The melody of a sweet piano and string prelude carried in the caressing breeze.
"Oh, no!" she exclaimed.
"What is it?" Auron looked startled, lightly squeezing her hand.
"Yunie's final song!" Rikku retracted her hand, jumped up, and made her way out from underneath the canopy, carefully walking onto the shoopuf's neck.
"What are you doing, Rikku!! That's not safe!"
Though she couldn't make out the faces, a few heads turned out of the several dozens as if to search for her and Auron dancing together. Not that she cared at this particular moment, but since the evening started, she hadn't danced with anyone. Only faintly could she hear the first few lyrics of a love song she'd never heard before...
It took just one more step to make her feel the cold water slap her face. She slid on one of her high-heeled sandals and tumbled into the river before she knew what was going on. Standing up, throwing her hair back over her shoulders and gaining her breath back again, she waved up at Auron, who was crouching down over her, still atop the shoopuf's neck.
"What did I tell you," Auron shook his head. "Are you alright?"
"Fine, fine," she said. "You should come down here. The water feels
great!" She splashed a wave up at him, and just as he swiped the water off his face, he lost his balance and landed in the water next to her, just as fast.
"Thanks a lot," he said sarcastically.
"Shhhhhh!!!!" Rikku hissed. "This is Yunie's last song, you know!"
Auron stepped forward and faced her, then they both looked Yuna's way and listened to the music. Slowly, like candles being lit one by one, firefly-like lights with soft pastel colors encased themselves inside the moonlilies. The water began to glow like a sea of stars in rainbow-hued, marble-like fluid like a child's blowing-bubble formula. This and Yuna's sweet, euphonic voice made it all perfect.
"...Those days are gone
Now I want you so much
The night is long
And I need your touch
Don't know what to say
Never meant to feel this way
Don't wanna be
Alone tonight
What can I do
To make you mine?
Falling so hard, so fast, this time
What did I say?
What did you do?
How did I fall in love with you?"
The pyreflies, a white-gold and lamplight now, were beginning to nearly blind Auron, but it only meant the more clearly he was able to see Rikku. Her skin glowed more golden-tan than before now, and she looked like an angel. He should have seen it before, the way her hair hung down straight with just a few braids hanging at the side. She transformed into a fairy-tale princess of some sort in one day, just for him.
Damn, she's beautiful, Auron thought as he caught himself moving his arm around Rikku's waist.
Let's hope you know what I mean one day, Auron, Braska had told him. That you will marry and understand the sentiment connected with small things like these.
I doubt that. Lord Braska, you should stay motivated. Everything, all those memories, will double their meanings once you defeat Sin and save them forever, Auron replied.
That's inspiring, Auron, Braska replied, nodding and carrying on across the Calm Lands, letting his Yevon temple robe hang down and trail behind him.
I understand what you're saying, but it's senseless to get worked up over a banquet.
Relax, Auron. They were just giving him a gift, a chance to have a little fun before whacking the crap outta Sin at the end of the pilgrimage, Jecht said, coming up and slapping the more stoic guardian on the shoulder. He certainly looked the type of person who would say that, rugged with a beard, long hair, a bare chest, and bare feet.
And he didn't dance with anyone, just stood in the corner watching, Braska said, only a blend of blue, red, black, and white in the darkness of the very early morning.
They wanted to stop your pilgrimage and make you a maester! Auron exclaimed. I wasn't just going to stand there if they were going to force it upon you!
I wouldn't be surprised if it's because Auron's never danced with a woman, Jecht said, crossing his arms and getting in Auron's way, as Braska progressed a good twenty paces ahead. I should have known all those years as a monk didn't do you any good.
If that's what you want to call it, Auron replied, hanging his head down and his arm out of his coat, pushing Jecht aside to catch up.
Is that what it is, Auron? You shouldn't feel ashamed. Braska turned around and smiled at his guardian amiably, letting the chilling wind whip his two long ponytails around his face.
Can we drop it? Auron demanded impatiently. You know we don't have much farther to go.
I think we can stop just this once for fun, Braska said, a thoughtful look spreading across his young and handsome face. You said yourself that at three in the morning we should be at an inn resting.
Can we sleep under the stars tonight?! A bright and excited look crossed Jecht's face. I wanna do that just this once before the pilgrimage is over! That's fun!
If you want.
Auron stifled an exasperated sigh. I guess if Braska approves I have nothing to say against it.
Braska and Jecht exchanged mischevious smiles. The summoner nodded and the blitzer approached Auron with the same troublesome grin. He lay a hand on Auron's shoulder and took his hand.
What the hell are you doing?!
What does it look like I'm doing? I'm showing you how to dance.
You've got to be joking me.
You've gotta learn sometime, don'tcha?
This is senseless! Auron tried to pry himself out of Jecht's grip, but damn, he couldn't. So there really were practical advantages to being a star athlete.
We're all adults here!
Oh, please, Auron? Braska asked nicely. Just a good laugh before my journey is over. It'll really... cheer me up, you know? I want to see this.
Yeah, Auron, show Braska you've got some human left in you. Have a good time.
This is your idea of me having a good time? Auron said, perplexed, almost whining. Braska... will this really make you happy? I mean, honestly, is this entertaining for you?
It would be really nice if you did this for him, Jecht told him.
Braska only smiled pleadingly.
Fine, but if anyone sees or hears about it, I'm going to kill you, Auron groaned.
Put your arm around the pretty lady's waist, Braska said, guiding him as Jecht smiled tauntingly.
Auron did as instructed with his face burning, though fortunately, no one could really see at three in the morning.
And he wasn't that bad either, he only stepped on my foot about four times, Jecht said when the ordeal was over and they had carried on with the pilgrimage.
When the Final Aeon was obtained in Zanarkand, and his friends were gone, Auron recalled that memory with a foolish smile and never forgot it. Even if it meant dancing with Jecht again, he longed to experience the whimsy of the young, lost yesterdays.
"How Did I Fall in Love With You", Backstreet Boys
"Rikku? Rikku!!!!" Auron yelled, carrying his jacket draped over his arm and searching frantically for the distraught little Al Bhed.
What the hell have I done?!? I'm not done yet, not now that I've come this far. I've got to tell her.... I've got to figure something out. This can't happen.
"Rikku, I'm sorry, I'm so damn sorry. Please, forget everything I said, just come out here. Please believe me-I'd fight off everything if it meant I could stay with you longer...."
Auron walked alone in the darkness, with the waters of the Moonflow reaching up to his ankles. He shook his fists by his side and stamped into the wet sand.
"DAMN IT!!!!!!" Looking every which way, she was still nowhere in sight. No lights were on inside the Celsius, and he'd already looked for her among the crowd. His eyes ached for a flash of shimmering emerald-jade green and any trace of long, golden hair hanging straight down.... When he felt like both of them were lost in this ridiculous ocean of loud colors and music, he trudged his way toward the end of the banks, fuming at himself.
For awhile he thought maybe things were supposed to end this way. Maybe it was easier, less complicated on everyone's lives, if he and Rikku existed in separation.
That's right, shouldn't you know by now that it wasn't meant to be? Auron asked himself. Not only are you about twice her age, but you're also walking Spira as an unsent. You have no reason to be here.
"Well, then, get me out of here!!!" Auron shouted into the air, as if a force would bring him back to the Farplane. Not like it would work, of course. Not while he still looked twenty-five.
"The Celsius is that way, you know," Rikku's voice reached him from somewhere he couldn't see. He looked all about him.
"No, not that way! THAT way!!"
Auron turned around and looked up, seeing Rikku sitting in the passengers' area aboard a sleeping shoopuf. Moonlight sluiced all around her silhouette and he had to squint to see her.
"What are you doing up there? You had me worried, running off like that! Women, I swear..." Auron ran up to the mint-green, elephant-like creature with very short ears. Its curling proboscis rested in the water, and the shoopuf didn't seem to mind Rikku up on its back.
"Coming down any minute soon?" Auron called up to her.
"I don't know," Rikku told him, standing up and leaning against a pole that supported the canopy hanging over the passengers' area.
"Look, I'm sorry I upset you. I'm willing to take all that back if you come down."
"Why don't you come up here?"
"Fine." Auron walked around the shoopuf's massive body and Rikku threw a rope ladder down at him from its pillar-like hind leg. Auron made his way up and seated himself on a cushioned bench adjacent to Rikku. "Now, why are we up here?"
"I don't know, really. I thought I might enjoy the view from here. It's a great distraction." Rikku's eyes didn't meet his just yet.
"Rikku... will you forgive me for saying that? And if not, are you able to forget?"
"...Okay." She sat back down, across from him, and the moment she did so, he got out of his seat and knelt at her knees. Rikku folded her gloved hands nervously in her lap, until Auron took one of her hands in his, and gazed into her eyes.
"Let me rephrase everything. I've never known a better joy than being with you tonight even while I was still living-"
"...Auron..."
In the mellowed background, which was still hard to drown out, Rikku heard Yuna announce her final song coming on. The melody of a sweet piano and string prelude carried in the caressing breeze.
"Oh, no!" she exclaimed.
"What is it?" Auron looked startled, lightly squeezing her hand.
"Yunie's final song!" Rikku retracted her hand, jumped up, and made her way out from underneath the canopy, carefully walking onto the shoopuf's neck.
"What are you doing, Rikku!! That's not safe!"
Though she couldn't make out the faces, a few heads turned out of the several dozens as if to search for her and Auron dancing together. Not that she cared at this particular moment, but since the evening started, she hadn't danced with anyone. Only faintly could she hear the first few lyrics of a love song she'd never heard before...
It took just one more step to make her feel the cold water slap her face. She slid on one of her high-heeled sandals and tumbled into the river before she knew what was going on. Standing up, throwing her hair back over her shoulders and gaining her breath back again, she waved up at Auron, who was crouching down over her, still atop the shoopuf's neck.
"What did I tell you," Auron shook his head. "Are you alright?"
"Fine, fine," she said. "You should come down here. The water feels
great!" She splashed a wave up at him, and just as he swiped the water off his face, he lost his balance and landed in the water next to her, just as fast.
"Thanks a lot," he said sarcastically.
"Shhhhhh!!!!" Rikku hissed. "This is Yunie's last song, you know!"
Auron stepped forward and faced her, then they both looked Yuna's way and listened to the music. Slowly, like candles being lit one by one, firefly-like lights with soft pastel colors encased themselves inside the moonlilies. The water began to glow like a sea of stars in rainbow-hued, marble-like fluid like a child's blowing-bubble formula. This and Yuna's sweet, euphonic voice made it all perfect.
"...Those days are gone
Now I want you so much
The night is long
And I need your touch
Don't know what to say
Never meant to feel this way
Don't wanna be
Alone tonight
What can I do
To make you mine?
Falling so hard, so fast, this time
What did I say?
What did you do?
How did I fall in love with you?"
The pyreflies, a white-gold and lamplight now, were beginning to nearly blind Auron, but it only meant the more clearly he was able to see Rikku. Her skin glowed more golden-tan than before now, and she looked like an angel. He should have seen it before, the way her hair hung down straight with just a few braids hanging at the side. She transformed into a fairy-tale princess of some sort in one day, just for him.
Damn, she's beautiful, Auron thought as he caught himself moving his arm around Rikku's waist.
Let's hope you know what I mean one day, Auron, Braska had told him. That you will marry and understand the sentiment connected with small things like these.
I doubt that. Lord Braska, you should stay motivated. Everything, all those memories, will double their meanings once you defeat Sin and save them forever, Auron replied.
That's inspiring, Auron, Braska replied, nodding and carrying on across the Calm Lands, letting his Yevon temple robe hang down and trail behind him.
I understand what you're saying, but it's senseless to get worked up over a banquet.
Relax, Auron. They were just giving him a gift, a chance to have a little fun before whacking the crap outta Sin at the end of the pilgrimage, Jecht said, coming up and slapping the more stoic guardian on the shoulder. He certainly looked the type of person who would say that, rugged with a beard, long hair, a bare chest, and bare feet.
And he didn't dance with anyone, just stood in the corner watching, Braska said, only a blend of blue, red, black, and white in the darkness of the very early morning.
They wanted to stop your pilgrimage and make you a maester! Auron exclaimed. I wasn't just going to stand there if they were going to force it upon you!
I wouldn't be surprised if it's because Auron's never danced with a woman, Jecht said, crossing his arms and getting in Auron's way, as Braska progressed a good twenty paces ahead. I should have known all those years as a monk didn't do you any good.
If that's what you want to call it, Auron replied, hanging his head down and his arm out of his coat, pushing Jecht aside to catch up.
Is that what it is, Auron? You shouldn't feel ashamed. Braska turned around and smiled at his guardian amiably, letting the chilling wind whip his two long ponytails around his face.
Can we drop it? Auron demanded impatiently. You know we don't have much farther to go.
I think we can stop just this once for fun, Braska said, a thoughtful look spreading across his young and handsome face. You said yourself that at three in the morning we should be at an inn resting.
Can we sleep under the stars tonight?! A bright and excited look crossed Jecht's face. I wanna do that just this once before the pilgrimage is over! That's fun!
If you want.
Auron stifled an exasperated sigh. I guess if Braska approves I have nothing to say against it.
Braska and Jecht exchanged mischevious smiles. The summoner nodded and the blitzer approached Auron with the same troublesome grin. He lay a hand on Auron's shoulder and took his hand.
What the hell are you doing?!
What does it look like I'm doing? I'm showing you how to dance.
You've got to be joking me.
You've gotta learn sometime, don'tcha?
This is senseless! Auron tried to pry himself out of Jecht's grip, but damn, he couldn't. So there really were practical advantages to being a star athlete.
We're all adults here!
Oh, please, Auron? Braska asked nicely. Just a good laugh before my journey is over. It'll really... cheer me up, you know? I want to see this.
Yeah, Auron, show Braska you've got some human left in you. Have a good time.
This is your idea of me having a good time? Auron said, perplexed, almost whining. Braska... will this really make you happy? I mean, honestly, is this entertaining for you?
It would be really nice if you did this for him, Jecht told him.
Braska only smiled pleadingly.
Fine, but if anyone sees or hears about it, I'm going to kill you, Auron groaned.
Put your arm around the pretty lady's waist, Braska said, guiding him as Jecht smiled tauntingly.
Auron did as instructed with his face burning, though fortunately, no one could really see at three in the morning.
And he wasn't that bad either, he only stepped on my foot about four times, Jecht said when the ordeal was over and they had carried on with the pilgrimage.
When the Final Aeon was obtained in Zanarkand, and his friends were gone, Auron recalled that memory with a foolish smile and never forgot it. Even if it meant dancing with Jecht again, he longed to experience the whimsy of the young, lost yesterdays.
"How Did I Fall in Love With You", Backstreet Boys