By Ramsey Anderson
All characters in this fic are property of Squaresoft and were not created by me.
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Chapter 5
Seifer was snapped at by Xu and Headmaster Cid, being told that he would be disciplined for his irresponsible actions. I had failed in my personal mission to stop Seifer. When I saw Seifer's face after he had been yelled at, I knew what he was thinking. He was thinking that they were wrong, and that he would show them that he was SeeD material. Before, it was almost funny to see someone like him with his head down, being told that he wouldn't make it in life, but this time, it wasn't funny, it was devious.
I waited outside the classroom, patiently waiting for the Garden Faculty to tell me that I was going to be a SeeD. Zell paced back and forth, so nervous, so unnecessarily worried. I would've talked to him, but I still couldn't get my mind off of that Dollet soldier. I should've known that the Spider Robot would be coming down those steps. I should've moved him out of the way when I saved him from the Anacondaur. But I didn't, I failed him and myself...
Selphie approached me, "What's wrong Squall? Nervous about the exam? You shouldn't be, you did great, you're a shoo-in."
"....."
"You're still thinking about that Dollet soldier, aren't you?"
I guess I was easy to read, plus Zell had told her the story on our way back to Garden. I responded after a long pause, "Yeah…"
"Don't be so hard on yourself. Listen, you did everything you could've done. Maybe he was just unlucky, ya know? I mean, he was attacked twice in like, ten minutes, that's saying something, doncha think?"
I thought about it for a second, then said, "Yeah, maybe you're right. Sorry to keep you worried."
"No problem!" Selphie responded cheerfully.
I admired Selphie for her ability to cope with any situation in such a delightful manner. It hurt me to realize how much heartbreak she would go through during our journey. She would work so hard on making the Garden Festival the best it could be, only to have it destroyed when we crash into Fisherman's Horizon. Her birthplace would be obliterated by missiles, many of her friends would die. Yet, she would still remain optimistic. I didn't want to see her suffer. I will prevent the attack, I promise.
Maybe she was right about the Dollet soldier having bad luck or whatever. Fortune doesn't smile on everyone, that's for sure. Take me, for example, or poor Selphie. Hmm, but I don't think it's bad luck that he had, I'd call it…
"Dincht! Zell Dincht!" The Garden Faculty interrupted me in thought.
Zell exclaimed his enthusiasm and pride as he gleefully pranced out of the hallway and into the Headmaster's room. My name was called, Seifer's was not. He would not be a SeeD, just as Xu said.
I listened as Headmaster Cid spoke to the four of us, Selphie, Zell, Nida, and I about what our duties as SeeD members were. He told us that we were mercenaries operated for the Garden, combat specialists in his words. What he did not tell us was that SeeD's purpose was to fight sorceress's, that we were going to be assigned the task of murdering his wife, Edea.
After all words were said, I took the elevator with the other recruits to the second floor, where all the unqualified students clapped for us. It's funny, I had saved the world from time compression but a day ago and received no thanks at all, but for simply becoming a SeeD, I am applauded.
I walked to my dorm to change into my SeeD uniform for the 'first time'. As I dressed, I thought about the inauguration dance I was about to attend. I will finally be able to see Rinoa again. I've so missed her gorgeous face, her remarkable attitude, her lovely voice… God, I've been through so much since I last saw her, but now things will finally pick up. Of course, to her, this will be our first time ever meeting. She won't recall me rescuing her from space, the time I shared my feelings with her aboard the Ragnarok, or the time I saved her from the sorceress memorial. Because none of that has happened yet.. I got dressed and headed to the SeeD Inauguration Dance.
When I arrived, I got butterflies in my stomach, my mouth was dry, and my palms became sweaty. I got a drink and thought, What's wrong with me? Why am I so nervous? Well, it could be that I'm worried about messing up my chances with Rinoa. This is very important, after all. Not too many people get a chance to redo a night that could have been so much better. To calm down, I found Zell and made conversation with him. He seemed to be having a good time, and his attitude had rubbed off on me a bit, putting me at necessary ease. Selphie approached me with an offer to join the Garden Festival Committee, which I considered but declined. I would have joined, but I knew that I wouldn't have time.
Across the room, mine and Rinoa's eyes met. Immediately, my heart sang as she pointed up towards the night sky and smiled. I couldn't help but smiling as well, and I might've even broke down if I hadn't had more control than I did.
When she approached me, she complimented, "You're the best looking guy here. Dance with me? Let me guess... You'll only dance with someone you like. Ok then... Look into my eyes... You're- going-to-like-me... You're-going-to-like-me... Did it work?"
She did not have to hypnotize me to get me to like her, I was already in love. "It worked, shall we?"
I was surprisingly relaxed as we held hands and began dancing. We danced in perfect rhythm this time, not missing a step or a beat, avoiding running into any other dancing couples, adding a little improvisation as well. It was such a wonderful feeling, letting all your worries, problems, and time inconsistencies disappear as you danced away with the person you loved. Maybe tonight, I can take her to the training center and watch the beautiful night sky as we talk. Even though today has been such a terrible ordeal, it will end well, it will…
After the song ended, we stopped dancing and she spied her friends from across the room. She said goodbye and walked away, leaving me to drown in agony, once again. I slowly staggered over to the balcony and watched the stars, thinking about nothing else except my own misery. It was a terrible thought to imagine someone you love so dearly not remembering your most precious moments together. I thought things could be different this time, something better, but instead, i've come out more miserable than i was before.
Quistis came up behind me, dressed in her usual outfit, as she had not attended the ball. "You're awfully down for someone who just a minute ago looked so happy dancing with someone very pretty. Did she hurt you? If so, I'm sorry, I know how it feels when someone you like doesn't have feelings for you…"
I realized that she was talking about me. I had forgotten about Quistis' feelings for me. Later, she would find out that those feelings were not romantic, but instead friendly feelings for her old childhood friend.
"...Oh, I completely forgot. I wonder what's to become of me? I've come to give you an order. You and I are to go to the 'secret area'. It's where students secretly meet up and talk after curfew. It's inside the training center." Quistis ordered.
I would've preferred to just sit in my room and think about things, I was very tired too, once I thought about it. Something inside me told me, however, to go with Quistis to the training center. "Alright, I'll go get changed and meet you there."
After taking a moment to gaze at the stars, I walked out of the ballroom without looking back. I changed out of my SeeD uniform and into my regualar clothes, grabbing my gun blade on my way out. When I reached the training center, me and Quistis headed to the secret area which was the furthest point from the entrance. We encountered a few monsters, generally easy to defeat, and made it to the secret area. Quistis spoke to me as we viewed the lighted Balamb Garden, informing me of her resignation as an instructor and her decision to be a full time SeeD.
"You're making the right decision. You'll make a great SeeD." I replied.
"They told me that I failed as an instructor. Basically, that I lacked leadership qualities. I was a SeeD by the age of 15, got my instructor license at 17... It's only been a year since I got it... I wonder where I went wrong... I did my best... "
"You're a fine instructor, but I just think that you'll be more happy as a SeeD."
"Thank you Squall, I appreciate that... You've changed, you know. I kinda expected you not to say much at all tonight, but you're being so supportive. What happened to you?"
I paused and realized how much I had changed during my quest. It was because of Rinoa that I opened up, started trusting people, and let go of the past. "I guess I realized that just because one person let you down doesn't mean that you should stop trusting everyone…"
We exited the secret area and started walking towards the entrance when…"Somebody help!" A disembodied voice cried out.
It was Ellone. I couldn't believe that I had forgotten all about this moment. I blamed it on the GF's and how junctioning them can make you forget things. Now is my chance to talk to her. She may know what's going on with my situation.
Quistis and I hurried towards the entrance where we found Ellone being attacked by the flying beast, Granaldo. "Squall!! Squall!! Quisty?" Ellone called to us.
We fought the demon, and with adrenaline rushing through me, Quistis and I fell the creature quickly. I ran over to Ellone, completely speechless, despite the fact that I had so much to say. She was hurt, but not critically. Before I could say anything, a couple of White SeeDs hurried to her aid, pushing me away from her.
"Sir, stay back." The pusher ordered.
"It is not safe here. Please, let's go." The other White SeeD told Ellone.
"Alright." Ellone responded.
"No! Wait, please, I need to talk to you, Ellone!! Wait!" I shouted at her.
"No sir, I cannot permit you to come any closer." The SeeD demanded as he barred my path.
A lesser person would have used force to get to her, but I remained docile, simply trying to get by the White SeeD blocking my way. "NO! I beg of you! Please, let me come with you sis!! Please, GOD DON'T DO THIS!!"
Ellone stopped and turned around to look at me. She stared at me, observing the sincerity in my eyes, the trembling in my hands. "Let him come with us, don't worry, I know him."
A great weight lifted off my shoulders as I knew that some of my questions would soon be answered. Quistis stood where she was, then shouted before I could leave, "Wait, where are you going Squall? Who is that?"
"Don't worry Quistis, I'll be fine. I'm sorry, but I have to follow her." I spoke loudly as I walked away, leaving her alond and in complete confusion.
I followed Ellone and the SeeDs out of Balamb Garden and towards the sea, where the familiar White SeeD ship was docked. Once we were all aboard, the ship sailed immediately into the night. There's nothing left for me back at Balamb Garden, as long as I get to talk to Ellone, I'll be fine. As the bright lights of Garden faded into the distance, I wondered if I would ever see it again.