"Buffy!" I called after her, but, damn she's fast. I sighed and got to my feet, the letter from my father still in my hand. I tucked it back into my jacket pocket and went in search of my father's love.
It's strange to think of her as that, even though I know from his letter, that that's what she is to him and always will be. I have come to grips with the fact that my birth father has died, I have another one, who I do love and who does love me. But with Buffy…her and Angel are soulmates, I'm not sure how she's going to handle this.
"Buffy, where are you?" I called as I walked through the large lawns, looking behind trees, shrubs and a few large pot plants. No Buffy.
It seems so strange that this is how I'm meeting the famous Buffy Summers like this. I have to admit that I've always wondered about the girl who sent my father to Hell, but then my memory was altered and some other stuff happened before I forgot everything, stuff I don't really feel like going into right now. Things that I will have to explain to Buffy once I can get her to stay still and listen.
"Buffy!"
I yelled her name again and again, but still nothing. After nearly 20 minutes of looking for the slayer, I decided that I should give up for now. she doesn't need anyone hounding her as she's trying to figure out all the mess that's in her head.
Plus, she'll probably beat me up. I remember that Faith was much stronger than me, and from what I've heard Buffy is even stronger than her. Ouch.
"Yo, boy."
"Huh?"
Dawn suddenly stepped out from behind a large tree. "Are you Connor? Are you Angel's son?"
"Yeah," I said slowly. "And you're Buffy's sister."
"Depends how you look at it."
That I don't understand, "how did you sneak up on me? You're just a human."
She gave a short laugh and looked directly in my eyes, it was then that I realised she had been crying. "I've been doing this demon hunting thing for years now, you have to be a little stealthy."
"Right. Do you know where Buffy is?"
She shook her head, "is he really dead?"
"Yeah, well I think so. You know he would have come back if he could."
"I guess, but he always came back. Always. He was like a brother to me, but Buffy…even I don't know how she's going to handle this."
"That's bad."
"What do you know?" she spat at me, "you never saw them together, or her after he left, after Hell. You know nothing about them-"
"He told me some things, and more in a letter-"
"A letter! Who cares what was in the letter! What, he said that he loved her, then left her to slowly die! You know nothing about them! Nothing, nothing, nothing, nothing!" she then fell to the ground, crying, she sunk into a fetal position and continued to cry.
I felt bad for getting her angry, "Dawn…" I took a few steps towards her.
"Don't."
"Sorry, don't what?"
She lifted her head off the ground and sat up slowly, tears still falling from her eyes. "Don't try and make me feel better. I don't need someone to talk to right now, I don't want to talk to anyone. I love Angel, sure, but I'm not in love with Angel. It's not me you need to make feel better."
"Yeah, but I made you angry."
She laughed, "you really think I wouldn't be angry anyway. Angel's dead, and for real this time. I think I'll be angry, sad and depressed for a while. What you need to do is-"
"Talk to Buffy." I finished. Dawn nodded.
"But I don't think you're going to find her today. She'll come back here when she's ready to talk."
"Then what am I going to do till then?"
"Well, since Buffy's going to need you for a while, you should probably think about sticking 'round."
I blinked hard, "I don't think that's such a good idea."
"Why not? You have somewhere else to be?"
"No not really, but…I-I just…" I took a breath, "this is weird, even for me. I don't know how I can help."
"You're part of him. Did anyone else survive the big fight?"
I shook my head.
"Then she's really going to need you to talk to." Dawn got to her feet, "so does that mean…Spike, is he really gone this time too?"
"Spike, oh, that blonde vamp. Yeah, he's dust now."
New tears filled Dawn's eyes. "Bloody hell." But she managed to smile slightly at me. "You hungry?"
"Yeah, didn't get much breakfast."
"Well, it's nearly lunch time and Buffy can't cook to save the world, not that it matters at the moment since she's gone AWOL. But I could make you a sandwich."
"That'll be good."
Once inside the huge kitchen in the huge house, I asked a question that has been bugging me a bit. "Does anyone else live here?"
"Kinda." Said Dawn pulling things out of the fridge. "Myself and Buffy live here fulltime. Giles, he's Buffy's Watcher, he lives in London to be closer to the HQ of the Watchers Council. Xander, Willow and Kennedy live here when their not on missions. But all are away at the moment, so you won't be meeting anyone new yet. But I do have to say that Giles will be very fascinated with your origins."
"That's something to look forward to, I guess."
After lunch Dawn took me to where I was going to sleep that night, it was a nice room with it's own bathroom and walk-in-robe.
"You sure about this?"
"Yeah, I could use the company anyway. I never get to go on any missions 'cause Buffy has forbidden it and she's always busy with her job at the Council, so I don't really have anyone to talk to about demons and of the like. But I do have to go and make some phone calls…the others they have to know ab-about Angel…"
I gave a slight nod, Dawn also nodded, then left the room.
"What have you gotten yourself into?" I asked myself, out loud I might add. "Angel, did you know this was going to happen? Did you know that Buffy would need me this much, that Dawn would? This is stupid," I mumbled falling backwards onto the bed.
How incredibly screwed up is my life? What am I going to tell my parents? 'Mom, Dad. I know I'm supposed to be in college, but right now I have to help my real dad's ex and her younger sister deal with his death.' Yeah, that'll go down real well.
A quick glance at the clock upon the mantle – wait, there's a fireplace in this room too – told me that it was only 1:14pm. Great, just great. What am I going to do for the rest of the day, and the day after that, and after that? How long will it take to get Buffy to deal with Angel being dead? I know that I'm supposed to want to help her, or maybe I'm just meant to be around so she can ask for help…I don't know, I don't really feel like thinking about it right now, it's making my head hurt.
I realised then that I should ring my parents and tell them where I am. Frankly, it's a conversation I'm not looking forward to. But I know I'm supposed to be here right now. I've always had a purpose, a lot of purposes, this is just another one I guess.
Oh, crap! Dawn's on the phone ringing up Angel's old friends to tell them that he's dead. I cringed, this sucks. My life used to be much less complicated. Ah well, I'll just have to ring my parents later.
TBC... thanks so much for all the wonderful feedback. The next update should be in a few days, Maddy