1 Chapter 2

Buffy got outside Giles's apartment door and paused, listening. Xander, Riley and Willow were already there. They were talking about her with Giles. As usual. "I'm worried Giles. She's so distant and rarely goes out any more, and she's always slaying." Willow informed the ex-librarian.

"That would be her job correct?" Giles countered. "Well, yeah but,"

"What Will's trying to say is Buffy's all work and no play. It can't be good, in fact I think it's illegal...somewhere." Xander cut in. "Perhaps she's focusing on her slaying to hone her skills."

"Yeah maybe, but that doesn't explain the detachment." Riley pointed out. "She's always finding some excuse to dodge our dates, knowing I take time off from the Initiative. It's like she's trying to avoid me." Giles eyed Riley for a moment, then Xander who just looked away guiltily. "I'm guessing someone has informed you about Angel." Riley nodded.

"Well is it possible she's not, yet, over Angel." "Oh come on, she's totally over dead boy. I mean she's with Riley now" Xander interjected. "She is." Riley agreed.

"Well it's been almost seven months and she doesn't say anything about him anymore, so yeah, she's got to be over him." Willow supplied.

"I know she is, she smiles and laughs and jokes with us again. She just needs to get back in the social crowd, go on more dates." she said looking at Riley for confirmation. "I'm willing but she's just not interested,"

"Of course she is." Willow said vehemently. "Your the exact change she needs from,"

"The bloodsucking-cursed-cradle-robbing-creature-of-the-night-ex?" Xander filled in.

Outside Buffy just rolled her eyes and sighed heavily. Surprise. surprise. What else is new? She thought. I don't understand why you didn't let Angelus kill them. I mean where the hell are these guys getting this crap? 'Over' Angel? How can you be over him wishing you were under him?

Again I ask, who asked you? At least your not denying it, like with Angelus. Buffy slammed a mental door closed before her alter ego could finish that compelling thought.

Just as Giles was about to reply Buffy opened the door and stepped in, closing the door behind her. They all averted their eyes looking guilty as Buffy flopped tiredly into the wooden chair by the fireplace, opposite the old olive colored couch and twin brown leather recliners where Giles, Willow, Riley and Xander were sitting.

The room was done in mainly in browns, neutrals and greens of various shades. In the living room where they were sitting, had only four other pieces of furniture, besides the ones they all were sitting in; which included a maple coffee table with a water ring on one side, another intricately carved mahogany table where some of Giles's books were scattered and ancient phone sat.There was also a rather large book case in the corner closest to her.

"So...what's the what?" Buffy questioned eyeing their reactions. Giles leaned forward in the recliner. "Two reasons actually. The first being that Xander, Willow, Riley and I are concerned about your recent behavior," Giles left the words hang in the air for a few beats before continuing."And the second being the sudden decline in demon activities."

"Well I hunted a small group of vamps, and three incredibly, smelly, mucus demons. If that's an example of 'declined demon activity' then your definition obviously needs some fine tunning, but then again that's just me." Buffy stated getting up. "Now if that's all then can't we talk about this tomorrow?"

"And your behavior?" Giles prompted ignoring her last question. "What about it?" Buffy asked offhandedly, sitting back down."The cold, distant behavior. The anti-socializing?"

Buffy rolled her eyes and got back to her feet. "Is that it? Your depriving me of my sleep for my lack of parting, painting my nails and actually doing what I was born to do?" Buffy asked flatly.

"Buffy you've been so unlike yourself lately. If your not in class your slaying. If your not slaying your training . You hardly ever do anything for fun or even hang out with us, me, any more." Riley complained. Buffy looked at them expectantly. "So...what?"

"That's exactly the attitude we're talking about Buffy. Your so one-track-minded on slaying you don't have time for anything else." Xander whined.

Buffy gave an unladylike snort and her gaze locked on Giles. "You know how shallow that sounds, how idiotic? Your all sitting here, what, lecturing me on taking my responsibilities seriously and neglecting you?"

Having it said that way made it seem very childish. Feeling so made both Willow and Xander turn away ashamed. Giles took out his hanky to clean his glasses.

Riley, believe him in the right, didn't back down. "We're not meaning it like that Buffy," Buffy's eyes pined him cutting him off mid-sentence. "Oh, and just how were you meaning it?" She asked tiredly.

Riley fidgeted under her unblinking stare, not knowing how to answer.

Buffy heaved a sigh, got up shaking her head and walked towards the door. She opened the door and looked back at them. "Look I can't say that I'm sorry for me slaying, it's what I do, I can't help it if my idea of 'fun' places different on my to-do-list then yours." She left the house and closed the door behind her.

As she was leaving she heard Xander say "It's all dead boys fault that she's like this."

Maybe it is his fault for the way I'm now, but they, also, helped. 'Cold, distant behavior'. If they only knew what was really happening eh? The words echoed in her head as shewalked back towards the dorms.

True. It couldn't be helped, she just couldn't find it in her to care. How can I? I don't feel anything. But you could... just give in.

But she couldn't, wouldn't give in even if she had to live, no exist, like this for the rest of her short life.Buffy stopped feeling almost any emotion and seeing color over three and a half months ago.

After the tears and confusion, the anger and pain everything progressively stopped. Until there was nothing left, but murky shades of gray.

So, consequentially she didn't care for or about anyone, also her wardrobeto a drastic turn from bright, flamboyant colors to mostly black and a little white.

Her conscience was a basic no go so, only her shear will kept her from giving into the darkness that was continuously eating away at what little humanity she had left.

Suddenly the breeze picked up a new sent. Buffy stopped walking and inhaled deeply, drawing the scent into her. The Slayer in her stilled, senses flared.

Something powerful was here as it had been all week. Moving closer. Waiting.

Change was in the air. It called to the Slayer. Daring her to fallow. The Slayer roared within Buffy clawing for supremacy, for dominance. Now. Give in. Let go. Can't you feel it?

Buffy did but she fought it down as she had before. The darkness churned like acid in her veins looking for even the smallest of openings in which to escape. It screamed at Buffy to let her loose. Let go.

Just like Angel fighting the demon in him. I fight the Slayer in me. Oh the irony. The Slayer tore at Buffy, fought her, even without her normal emotions Buffy fought her Slayer.

Her darkness. But it was becoming harder, more tempting, with every passing day. Every passing minuet.

It was only a matter of time before Buffy would loose control or gave in to it's seductive call, she had done it twice before, and they both knew it.

It was only a matter of time and patience.

Buffy got into her dark dorm room, changed back into her pajamas and climbed under the thick comforter. Buffy closed her eyes and then it hit her.

she was close to the surface. Very close and I don't care. And she didn't. Buffy drifted to sleep knowing, the scale was tipped in the Slayers' favor. And she wasn't the only one.

Times up love. A seductive whisper fallowed Buffy into sleep.