Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel, or the Wizard of Oz.

Chapter Eleven – City Fun, Part Two

Remy handed Scott the kitten. "No femme can deny a man wit a cute animal. Trust Remy."

The kitten held it's claws out in happy anticipation, then began torturing Scott again. Scott knocked on the door again, and Madelyne opened it. She looked as if she were about to scream again, but spotted Ebony and melted. "Awwww…Scott, you're so sweet!" She pulled Scott in by the arm, and let the others in.

An hour later, they were all full and sleeping in the living room where the twin witches lived. Well, everyone except Scott.

Remy woke up from a peaceful nap and sighed. "Remy don' get it. Emma, Jean, Madelyne…what da hell? He ain' no fun…but damn, dat boy can kiss." He groaned and stood up, disgusted by the thought, and tripped over Creed and Logan, who were sprawled out across the floor. "Remy gets Rogue, who only touches him right before somet'in bad happens. Ain' never kissed Remy when he didn't regret it!" He grumbled and walked back toward the kitchen, where he saw Jean. He knew it was Jean, because Scott was occupied with Madelyne, and the girl he was looking at was clearly jealous.

"'ello, Jean." He said, cheerfully. "Why y'lookin' so sad? Anyt'ing Remy can do?" Jean turned on him like an animal and threw herself at him, tearing her dress away as she kissed him. She pushed her back. "Merde…Remy should say no, y'Scott's girl, always have been, always will…" He smirked and kissed her back, lifting her around his hips.

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Six hours later, the four companions met on the steps in front of the house, each pretending nothing of particular importance happened. Except Remy, of course. "Hey Scottie?"

"What?" Scott said.

"Remy fucked y'girl. Merde, that body…" He said, smirking to the point of pain, so filled with a sense of accomplishment. He had sex with Jean, an act that would have otherwise gotten him killed.

Creed clumsily stumbled forward. "Remy, you kissed Scott and had sex with one of his woman. You are a slut."

"OUCH!" Scott screamed.

They looked down to see munchkins Kitty and Jubilee standing at his feet with matches. Logan ran, seeing the fire, Creed apathetically watched, and Remy beat the fire out of his legs. "What is dis?" He said. "Did y'momma ever teach y'not t'play wit matches?"

"The Guild Masters warned you!" Jubilee quickly pulled a knife and stabbed Remy in the back of the calf. Remy yelped and pulled the knife out, then charged it.

"Y'girls are wit da Guild?" Remy laughed at them as they stood fearlessly at his feet. "What do y'do?"

"We're thugs!" Kitty said, in her tiny little voice, holding a handful of lollipops.

"Yeah!" Jubilee said. Remy withdrew the charge from the knife and knelt down, wincing at the pain in his leg.

"And jus' what do y'plan on doin' t'Remy?" Remy said, smiling at them.

Jubilee smiled back and then sweetly replied. "We're going to gut you, burn Scarecrow, feed Lion to wild animals, put Tin Kitty at the bottom of the moat…"

"And then stick these lollipops in your mouths, so they know it was us!" Kitty chimed in, equally cheery.

An Emerald City guard apparently overheard them and stepped in. "You are the Lollipop Murderesses?" He asked, pointing a spear at them and motioning other soldier over. "You are under arrest for the Sugar High Massacre. You have the right to remain silent, you have the right to…" He lead the girls away.

"Merde, let's get t'the Wizard." Remy said. "Jubes and Kitty, career criminals?" He shook his head in disappointment. "'Least Remy got to sleep wit Jean."

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Next Chapter: The Wizard of La is revealed!

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