Cathartic Moments
This story is AU (Alternative Universe) from the "Experience is the Teacher". Basically think of it as an alternative ending if Mr. Zwick and Co. had the allotted 22 instead of 19 eps. Stupid ABC. Everything remains intact from "Experience is the Teacher".
Disclaimer: This fic is designed for non-profit use only. I own nafink. NAAAAFINK. It's all Mr. Zwick and Co. and the good people at ABC who used to and abused the show mercilessly. Good work ABC, you fickle sods
And, as usual, the biggest thanks I give is to my hardworking and always jolly(well, usually) beta reader, Karen, who has made this story writing process so much easier. Thank you, Karen.
Chapter Thirteen
"I can't believe you came to a twelve year olds birthday party," Grace teased, walking up to Eli who was lounging on a wall, looking decidedlybored.
Eli turned and smiled slightly at her, rolling his eyes self-deprecatingly. "Yeah," he admittedly sheepishly. "Dad really wanted me to go and I mean; she is actually my step-sister."
"But still. Twelve year olds'; birthday party," Grace smirked.
"Yeah," Eli chuckled. He took a sip of punch. "But this isn't actually the worst party ever. On Jessie's twelfth birthday I had to play with all her prepubescent friends." He shuddered involuntarily.
"Oh ew," Grace commiserated, reclining next to him on the wall. After a moment's pause she continued, "Is senior year really that hard?"
Eli pursed his lips but didn't say anything.
"Oh," Grace sighed.
"Just make sure you actually apply for more than one college," Eli said bashfully. He smiled wistfully. "But I'm sure colleges will be applying for you!"
"Shut up!" Grace joked, flushing.
After a moment's pause they both realized that there were no subjects left for discussion. Both teens stood awkwardly, unsure how to proceed.
Grace sighed and twisted her hands worriedly. "I'm sorry about before," she burst out reproachfully. "You know. That fight we had."
"No, I should be…" Eli let out an uncomfortable sigh. "It's my fault. I was being an ass."
"Well, you said it," Grace smirked.
Eli chuckled ruefully and shoved his hands in his pockets a tad defensively.
"Well, I mean it's no big deal now, but I mean, it's not like I think just because you don't have a college degree that you're this big…"
"Grace, it's ok," Eli interrupted her deftly. He shrugged, "I get it. And it's not like I haven't gotten that attitude from my parents forever."
"Ok," Grace said awkwardly. She shot Eli a curious look. "So what were you upset about?" she pried.
"Grace," Eli muttered.
"Don't worry about it," Grace amended quickly.
"No, it's ok," Eli mumbled, looking exasperated. "I just got another job."
"Oh my god!"
"No it's lame," Eli protested under his breath, holding his hands up defensively. "I'm not telling anyone yet, OK?"
"Ok," Grace agreed looking perplexed but nodding anyway. After a moment of strained silence Grace turned and surveyed the room.
"I'm going to grab some food, so I'll see you soon."
"Ok," he took a sip of his drink but stopped as something caught his eye. "Actually Grace could you do me a favor?"
"What?"
He indicated to Rick, Jessie and Katie who were seated on couches in the corner of the room. "My sister and Katie. They really are…"
"Dating?" Grace supplied.
Eli chuckled uncomfortably, "yeah."
"They are," Grace nodded, noticing the three in the corner for the first time. "I'm still surprised Katie actually turned up." She dragged her gaze away and looked and Eli carefully. "Are you weirded out?"
"Actually, it's kind of weird that it's not that weird." Grace looked confused. "I mean, I thought I'd be freaking out over the whole thing but really, I'm mostly fine with it. Although the gross thing is," Eli swallowed and looked slightly queasy.
"What?" Grace demanded, curiosity piqued. "What's gross?"
"Well, I kinda thought Katie was hot," Eli admitted distastefully. "But now she's dating my sister so…ugh!" Eli shuddered, horrified that he found the girl dating his little sister attractive. He felt as if his hormones had violated him.
"Oh," Grace sniggered, her eyes shining with amusement. She patted Eli's arm sympathetically. "There there."
"Eli!" it was Jessie, who was weaving her way through the throngs of people, looking aghast. She acknowledged Grace with a curt nod. "You guys have to help me," she pleaded. "They're talking about history! They're just sitting there…and talking!"
"What, you'd prefer it if he had a baseball bat?" Grace snorted
"No!" Jessie said dismissively. She turned to her brother and opened her eyes pleadingly. "Eli!" she whined.
"I'm sorry Jess," Eli said, squeezing his sister's shoulder affectionately. "Dad is like a homing beacon. If he wants to talk, he'll talk. Better to get it over with."
"There you are Jess," Katie butted in jauntily, joining the fray
"How are you?" Grace asked.
"Fine," Katie grinned. "Your dad is Ok," she said to Jessie and Eli. Eli nudged Jessie's side encouragingly but stopped when Jessie shot him a withering look.
"Let's get something to eat!" Jessie said forcefully to Katie, wanting to smuggle her off to a place where they could be alone. She dragged a beaming Katie away. Both Eli and Grace chuckled, grinning even wider when they overheard Katie enthusiastically saying "Jessie, he even invited me to dinner!"
Jessie pulled Katie away from Eli and Grace's prying eyes and into a relatively quiet spot. She turned and was greeted by Katie's beaming face.
"You look flushed," Katie exclaimed, reaching over and fussing with Jessie's shirt. "You know what I find is the cure to a bad care of the flush? Sugared goods."
"Oh yeah?" Jessie humored; her anxiety easing, content to just watch Katie.
"Yeah," Katie dug deep into her pockets and pulled out an M& M bag. Katie tore it open and tipped half of its contents into Jessie's hand. Jessie, not expecting the onslaught, yelped in surprise, the chocolate slipping through her limp fingers.
"Katie!" she chided, half amused, half exasperated.
"Now look," Katie complained. She bent over and retrieved the M& M's on the floor. "You wasted the precious candy." Her brow furrowed in deep concentration, then, as if a light were switched, her expression changed to glee. "Ten second rule still applies. Think Zoe will want them?"
"Don't you dare."
Laughingly they began to eat in earnest. Jessie almost groaned as the flavor coated her tongue. Like a distracted three year old, Katie continued to ramble, "Chocolate is so satisfying in everyway, you know. Like, you can't go wrong, it's appropriate in every situation." Katie continued, despite already finishing the candy. "Except white chocolate, I mean, that's just strange. And you'll find if you compare white chocolate with its milk equivalent…"
"Katie…"
"The milky goodness is less apparent and it makes you feel…"
"Katie!"
"What?"
"Dance with me."
Katie blanched. "What?"
"I want you to dance with me," Jessie said quietly, jest gone from her expression. "I mean, if that's ok?"
For the longest time Katie just stared. For a horrible moment, Jessie thought she was going to decline, but, trancelike, Katie nodded. Her hand nowsuddenly embarrassingly damp, Jessie lead Katie to the dance floor.
They were awkward at first; heavy arms unsure how to touch, swaying unsteadily to a slow beat. It wasn't until Jessie leant her head against Katie's shoulder that they sighed; bodies pressed together, stilling the frantic beat of their hearts.
And that's how they stayed.
Twenty minutes later Sam approached Rick, who was helping himself to a cupcake. Sam reached past him and filled his empty cup with punch.
"Hey Rick-o," he greeted.
"Sam," Rick turned and smiled at him. "Hey. I didn't know you were here."
"Yeah I've just been around," he indicated to the party with a casual throw of the hand. Rick smiled and continued to hoe into his cup cake.
Sam smirked slightly at Rick. "So," he said conversationally. "Jessie's gay huh? There's a shocker."
Rick stopped chewing and gaped at him, allowing Sam to see the congealed remains of cupcake. "She and her friend were dancing before. Not in a platonic way might I add," Sam continued, watching Rick swallow his food. "Am I correct in my assumption?"
Rick glared at Sam and grunted affirmative.
"Huh," Sam commented nonchalantly. "Well, I gotta give the kid credit. She's got her old man's good taste in women."
"Sam," Rick said warningly. "I have known you for a long time so I am going to forget you just said that."
"Said what?" Sam asked innocently.
Rick rolled his eyes and turned his back, about to go for seconds. Sam laughed and dashed around so he was facing Rick.
"I'm joking, I'm actually here for a reason," Sam said reassuringly. He smiled winningly. "I got a call this afternoon!"
"And?" Rick asked, excitement brewing in his stomach.
"Sammler and Blue Associates are now working with Allen Branch to bring new hotels to the good consumers of Chicago!" Sam finished triumphantly.
"Are you serious?" Rick asked, not daring to believe.
"On my life, man!" Sam crowed loudly. "We're on the joy train to success. Let's show those corporate bastards how it's done!"
"Yeah!" Rick and Sam slapped their hands together in a display of frat boy enthusiasm. They both looked abashed when half the room turned to gawk at them.
"Well, somebody's happy about the finger food," Lily said, hurrying over eager to find out what Rick was so excited about.
"We got the job!" Rick said joyously, collecting her in a big hug.
"Really?" Lily squealed, bouncing up and down with joy. They broke apart and she enthusiastically gathered Sam into a hug.
Sam grinned licentiously at Rick over Lily's shoulder. "We should get new jobs more often."
Lily broke away, a little embarrassed at actually touching Sam.
Sam smirked. "I gotta say, happiness becomes you, Lily," he said smoothly.
"Why thank you," Lily beamed, cuddling up to Rick's side.
"Yeah well, it amazes me, the way women look when they're in your position!" Sam continued earnestly, not heeding Rick's warning look to be quiet.
"Really?" Lily asked uncertainly.
"Well, it's true what the old cliché' says, you're just…glowing!" Sam said, raising his cup to her.
Lily shot Rick a look of venom. Her stomach dropped when Eli and Grace appeared behind Sam.
"Mom?" Grace asked, her eyes wide. She looked horrified. "Are you pregnant?"
"Honey shh!" Lily hissed frantically.
"Oh my god!" Grace moaned.
"Don't be so loud!" Lily scuttled over to Grace. "We should go to another room."
"I can't believe this," Grace complained, following her mother wearily.
Eli hung back and raised an eyebrow at Rick. "Whoa!"
Rick sighed and rubbed his son's back affectionately. "Yeah, I know. Let's follow your step-mother."
Rick had dashed off to find Zoe and Jessie, leaving an anxious Lily to face Eli and Grace in the back room. Both teens were reeling, standing a few feet away from an agitated Lily.
"When were you going to tell us this?" Grace demanded.
"We only just found out!" Lily protested defensively. "We were going to…"
"But just-ugh, a baby! How is that even possible?" Grace's voice overlapped Lily's. She paused for a moment, and then proceeded to look squeamish. "Actually don't answer that."
Lily flushed and was immensely relieved when Zoe, Jessie and Rick entered. Zoe caught the look of dismay on everyone's features. "Oh no what's wrong!" she wailed.
"Nothing's wrong."
Grace snorted. Lily shot her a venomous look.
"What's up?" Jessie asked cautiously.
Rick and Lily shared an anxious look. With a look of feigned nonchalance Lily stuttered
"Well, we've gathered you all to say," she took a steadying breath. "I'm pregnant."
"What?" Jessie hissed, stunned.
"Are you serious?" Zoe squealed.
"Yes sweetie," Rick assured.
"Oh my god!" Zoe jumped up and threw her arms around Lily, who winced. "Wow!'
"So you're happy?" Lily asked, leaning away from Zoe to look at her carefully.
"Yes!" Zoe enthused, "as long as I can help take care of it!"
"Oh, of course you can!" Lily gushed, wrapping her arms around Zoe.
"What about the rest of you?" Rick asked scanning the other kids faces.
"There isn't much else to say," Grace sighed. "I mean the damage is done and everything. I'll be out of here before the baby is old enough to be annoying anyway."
"Thanks," Lily said dryly.
"It's ok Dad," Eli reassured Rick.
"Jess?" Rick asked Jessie.
Jessie looked anxious. "Well, uh, well, congratulations," she said, still reeling from the revelation.
"Excellent," Rick said, cuddling Jessie warmly. "Maybe we can talk about this later because…hey, Lily isn't time to cut someone's cake?"
"Cake cutting?" Zoe squealed. She jumped up and beamed at Lily. "Mom you have to have extra."
"Why?"
"The baby needs to eat too!" Zoe instructed, leading her mother out followed by the rest of the gang, all looking incredulously at the birthday girl.
Karen reclined and took a sip of her cola. The house was deathly quiet except the soft hum of the television. She flicked channels aimlessly, settling on a daytime movie about a psychotic younger man falling for a repressed older woman.
She heard a key in the lock, then the door open. Karen sat up to see who it was.
"It's just me," Eli said walking into the living room and peeling off his jacket.
"Hi honey," Karen said tiredly.
Eli greeted Karen then headed straight to the fridge and grabbed a carton of juice. He was about to drink the contents from the container but thought better of it after his mother glared at him.
"I can't stay long." Eli said pouring himself a cup. "I gotta head off for a shower."
"Eli," Karen said warningly, sitting up and eyeing him beadily. "Eli, can you come here please."
Eli glanced at her, her tone bringing a familiar sinking feeling to his stomach. "Ok," he mumbled, leaving his drink and coming to sit next to his mother.
"Rick told me that you're now working part time at Booklovers," Karen said, a frown marring her features. She looked at Eli with concern and trepidation. "Is that true?"
Eli suddenly found his shoes fascinating, "Yeah."
"O-well, I" Karen spluttered, dumbfounded. "Why?" she asked, disappointment brewing.
"Mom," Eli complained with a heavy sigh.
"Don't 'mom' me, I think you should explain!"
"It's my life," Eli snapped at Karen. "You don't have to know everything!"
"Well I think I have to know why you're shortening your hours," Karen retorted peevishly. Eli pouted as his shoulders sagged, looking suitably downtrodden. Karen sighed and continued gently. "Booklovers is a real opportunity for you and you should be careful not to just throw it away."
"But it's not what I want," Eli protested weakly. He felt his eyes prick with tears, so he tore his blurry gaze away from Karen's.
"Oh," Karen breathed. She looked at her son, sitting beside her, so vulnerable and sad. She realized with a horrible jolt it had been a long while since she had seen him happy.
"Well, what do you want?"
Eli shrugged made a non-committal grunt then started to get up. Karen stopped him by placing a hand on his arm. "No, I really want to know!" Karen pleaded, voice wavering. "I promise I won't…just sit down. Please."
Eli paused and considered his options carefully. With a sigh he shuffled over and sat next to Karen.
"What do you want me to say?" he asked morosely, steadfastly ignoring his mother's sad eyes.
Karen rubbed his arm affectionately. "I just realized that I never sat down and asked what you would like to do with your life."
"You have," Eli said, looking confused.
"Well, now you're going to do most of the talking," Karen said wryly, pleased when Eli chuckled slightly.
"Oh," Eli said still avoiding Karen's eyes. When it became apparent that he was not going to speak Karen sighed and looked at him closely.
"So," she mused sadly. "If you could do anything in the world, what would that be?"
"A musician," Eli admitted ruefully. "But I-er." He sighed. "I'm not delusional. I know it's never going to happen, so, so I'm really just trying to move on."
"OK," Karen said evenly, her voice only slightly belying her relief. She continued rubbing her son's arm, noticing how despondent he looked. "So why did you cut down the hours?"
Eli raised his head and looked at Karen. Something flickered in his eyes, something Karen couldn't quite identify. After a pause, Eli said quietly, "I got a new job, Mom."
Karen's features changed to surprised. "Really, oh Eli," she gushed, impulsively hugging him. She felt him stiffen under her and she realized with a sinking feeling he was not telling her everything. She pulled away and looked at Eli suspiciously. "And?" she asked warily.
"It's a job. In a recording studio. I'm an assistant, helping going through all the demo tapes and everything. I work there most nights, it's in the city. I've been there for a week or two." Eli said in a resigned tone, staring motionlessly ahead, looking at everything but Karen.
"Oh," Karen choked, feeling her heart battering against her chest. She shook her head in confusion. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"Mom," Eli hedged, looking to get away.
"Eli!" Karen said desperately, suddenly feelingly acutely afraid. "Why do you feel that you can't tell me things?"
"Because it's music, Mom," Eli snapped, feeling frustration long bottled inside spilling out. He stood and looked at Karen, naked disgust flashing on his face. "Because I know it upsets you whenever I talk about it! So I didn't want to make it into a big deal." He glared at her, agitated, ready to defend himself, expecting Karen's usual display of hurt disappointment.
"Eli!" Karen breathed, standing up also. "Eli you never have to hide anything from me!" Eli rolled his eyes and sullenly glanced away, but Karen grabbed his arms desperately, imploring him to look at her.
"Does it make you happy?" she whispered.
Eli blanched. "What?"
"Does it?"
He stared at his mother for a long moment, as if unable to speak. After a long pause he whispered.
"Yeah."
"Then I won't be the one to stop you," Karen said, her voice wavering. She pulled Eli into a fierce hug. "I've spent too long trying to make other people happy." Karen murmured. "I don't want you making that mistake."
She wrapped her arms around her son and felt the tension seep from his body as his shoulders wavered, and she could tell he was willing himself not to cry. Karen drew away first, chuckling self-deprecatingly at her own tears. She wiped them away and tried to regain her control.
"Are you ok?" Eli asked gently.
"I'm fine," Karen shooed away his concern and tried to return to an emotional equilibrium. "How was the party?"
"Oh!" Eli said, smiling crookedly. "It was ok. If I never hear Britney Spears again it'll be too soon."
"Yes!" Karen chuckled. "But was it fun?"
"Ah," Eli shook his head in bemusement. "It was certainly educational."
Karen looked perplexed. "What do you mean?" she asked curiously.
Eli realized his folly and rushed to allay her concerns. "It's nothing!" he babbled. "It was fun!"
"Eli!" Karen chastised gently. "What do you mean educational?"
Eli looked guilty and shuffled his feat. "Mom," he said uncertainly. "Lily's pregnant."
Karen gaped uncertainly, unsure if she had heard right. "Excuse me?" she faltered.
Eli looked at her worriedly. "Yeah," he said gently. "They told us today."
.Karen tried to keep surprise and, perhaps, dismay, from appearing on her face. The words echoed in her head.
'Lily's Pregnant'
They had divorced years ago. Rick had moved on, and so had she, of course, but this was more final than any piece of paper could be.
"Lily's Pregnant'
Perhaps things could have been different in their marriage if only a few small events could have been altered. But it struck Karen now, as she gazed into the eyes of her penitent son, that it wasn't worth even contemplating it.
"Mom, are you ok?" Eli asked anxiously, reaching for her.
Karen smiled pensively as she took Eli's hand and squeezed. "I'm fine," she reassured him. "You don't have to worry about me."
Eli didn't look convinced. "You want me to stay with you for a while? We could watch some TV?"
Karen beamed at him. "I would love to honey but I have something I need to do."
"Ok."
"You can do one thing though," Karen said, a devilish smile playing on her lips. "Could you pass me my keys?"
Karen slowed the car down, pulling into the parking lot. A few meters away she could see a bunch of kids milling around the baseball field, obvious at the end of practice. A tall man accompanied them, smiling widely as he bade the children farewell. The kids all enthusiastically left, leaving Henry alone on the field.
With a determined nod, Karen got out of her car, leaning heavily on her cane. She hobbled over to him as he packed away the equipment.
"Karen?" Henry asked, standing up and he saw her approach. "Karen?"
"Hello!" Karen greeted him breathlessly, feeling her stomach tighten with excited knots.
"Uh-wuh, what are you doing here?" Henry asked, clearly thrown by her appearance.
"I spoke to one of the nurses on the phone," Karen said briskly. "She told me you coach little league at this time. With a small amount of persuasion she told me where you were," Karen smiled nervously at him.
"Oh," Henry said neutrally. He turned and started to pack the equipment away. "Well, is it urgent? Are you having trouble with your leg?"
"Uh no not exactly."
Henry turned and looked at her, his face clouded with confusion.
Karen took an unsteady breath as her heart beat like a manic drum. "I owe you a couple of things."
"Karen you don't owe me anything," Henry said uncomfortably.
"No, no I do," Karen said with great difficulty. She felt a strange sensation stir at the base of her tummy, a giddiness that she had long forgotten. "I have to say that when it came to you…I may have been mistaken."
"Excuse me?" Henry smirked incredulously.
"Well," Karen huffed a little indignantly. "I was going through a…rough time and I took it out on you. And you didn't deserve that. So I'm sorry."
"Karen," Henry sighed gingerly. "You have nothing to be sorry about. It happens. I've already forgotten."
"Yes that's what I'm afraid of," Karen earnestly said, trepidation creeping into her eyes.
Henry's back stiffened as he stopped, frozen. He regarded Karen warily, crossing his arms defensively around his chest.
"I am a little worried," Karen continued nervously, her eyes darting frantically. "That you have forgotten your promise."
"Promise?" Henry asked, amused and perplexed.
"Yes, promise," Karen repeated apprehensively. "You promised me an outing." She smiled shyly at him. "I remember saying yes."
"Ah!" Henry nodded with comprehension. "I do remember." He paused, "What if I told you that I'm not interested in an outing?"
"Well," Karen uneasily. "I would thank you and say goodbye and feel utterly foolish."
Henry eye's lit up and unexpectedly he chuckled, the warm sound washing over the silence. "There's a diner down the street." He grinned playfully. "You free now?"
"Free as a bird," Karen smiled happily. They turned to walk off.
"Do you need your cane?" Henry asked worriedly.
"I'm going to try without it," Karen said firmly, taking a shaky, determined step forward. Henry beamed at her, slinging his bag over his shoulder as they walked together down the street, enjoying the placid, still night.
It felt good to be free.