She really didn't know where it was exactly that she was running to, but that didn't stop her feet from pumping her body fast in the random direction. Her mind couldn't think of anything else to do but to run. Run from them, from her.. and most of all, from him. He who, tonight, had hurt her so deeply that she felt as if this feeling could never go away. That she would forever live in the memory and heartache of tonight. She could feel her chest grow ever so heavy and tired from the run which had begun at least 10 minutes ago, it felt as if her chest was closing up tightly around her heart, as it desperately tried to beat. Sweet was forming on her brow but was masked but the darkness of the evening. The sun had set way before the evening even began. The high heels that she wore on her feet had long since begun to hurt, due to the fact that she wasn't use to wearing such shoes, and she could feel the ribbon tied around her ankle loosen and began to tickle her skin. But none of that mattered. The only thing the mattered was that she wanted, no Needed, to get away from there. To be free of those blue eyes as they looked into hers as if nothing was wrong with touching his like she was. That that women just saw her as a little girl, to timid and embarrassed to admit that she had a crush on that man. No it was more then a crush, she wasn't a little girl she was once his girlfriend, once. Maybe if she just kept running, then that meeting would eventually fade into a terrible dream. That everything that made her hurt inside would disappear into nothing but a fake reality. But if it was to happen, it sure as hell wasn't working at that moment. She still hurt so badly. Letting out a small cry, she felt her heel slip from her foot and intertwine with her other one, and she fell face first into the pavement below Not gracefully, but with a painful thud, followed by a even worse little slide across the pavement until she came to a stop. Sakura chose to remain motionless on the floor where her body now lay. Not wanting to move, the coldness of the night actually felt nice, even if the obvious scratches that had appeared on her face now stung. The pain felt good. It brang her back to reality, took her mind off the pain in her heart. Even if it was just for a moment, Kakashi had faded from her mind. Unfortunately, almost as quickly as he had faded, the image and thoughts stubbornly drifted back to her head. She couldn't rid herself from him, no matter how fast she ran or how far, he would always he there. She loved him with all of her heart and soul after all. And even though it hurt so badly now, she still did love him.
She grew angry at herself. Why can't she just forget about him as he had forgot about her? How did it could so easily to forget about her when no matter how hard she tried she couldn't do the same? Maybe he never really loved her as much as she loved him? That must be it. She felt too much and she fell to fast. Maybe, somewhere in the back of her mind,she always knew that it would end like this. That she was always the one to get hurt, it was her curse.
"Fuck it!" She screamed in frustration to the empty Konoha streets and pushed herself to sit on the cold pavement below. Grabbing the stray shoe which lay beside her, she tossed it angrily towards the street. As if the realize the pressure built inside of her. Then reaching down, she furiously untied the shoe that still remained tied to her ankle. And with another throw, tossed the shoe against the tall tree that she sat beside. Falling back to her ass after the shoe had been realized from her death grip. Hating the way that the tree could just reflect the blow and remain unfazed by the whole thing. The tree was strong enough the remain proud and tall, and no matter how hard the shoe was thrown, that bark would never be hurt but it. She was losing her mind, being jealous of a tree. The thought mad her chuckle to herself in a sad laugh.
Why should it matter if she loved, after all? Why is it in human nature to believe that they need to be loved. A shinobi should never show emotions no matter what, and Sakura was sure that she was very capable of taking care of herself. But even if she kept telling herself that rule, her heart did long to be loved and love in return. But it was always her doing to loving. Almost everyone that she ever loved turned out to not share the same feeling. Her father, Sasuke. She just wanted so badly for Kakashi to be the different one, maybe a little too much. And for a while there, she actually believed he was. He always told her that he loved her, as well as showing her. He never asked too much of her, never pressured her into something she didn't want to do. Like their sex life for example. She knew very well that Kakashi wanted to make love to her, but she told him that she wasn't ready, and what was strange was that he listened. He didn't push her. But it was a lie. With a little problem as her father, he gave up on her, forgotten her . All for another. Maybe he just wanted a sexual relationship?
Tears of sadness poured from her soul, from her eyes, and ran down her cheeks as she hid her face deep into her hands at that thought. Huddling into a tight, rather pathetic, ball, he body shock with sobs. She was weak, too emotional she told herself.
"I'm so pathetic."She whispered to herself.
"No you're not." She jumped when the deep voice suddenly interrupted her self loathing. Her teary eyes lifted slowly from her hands as up into the mix matched eyes that looked into hers. She saw Kakashi, he was standing just a small distance away. She could tell that he was troubled, as his eyes were saddened deeply. Sakura immediately looked away, maybe if she didn't see him, he really wasn't there. She wouldn't have to hurt again. But he didn't go away, he just remained silent and still, not moving closer or further towards her. She furiously whipped the wetness from her eyes.
"How did you find me?" She whispered finally, as her hands wrapped around her knees drawing them close to her chest, but remaining on the floor.
"I could always find you." He answered. He was right. He did have a strange talent of always knowing where to find her. A pity that this time she didn't want him to.
"Go away." She whispered, her voice cracking as new fresh tears stung her green eyes. But as Kakashi took as step forward, she shifted away, once again recoiling her legs against her chest. So he didn't move. "Please just leave me alone."
"Sakura, we need to talk-" He was cut off when she chuckled. But it was fake. It held no joy, no happiness. It hurt him.
"I'm surprised that you even remember my name." She retorted, anger rising within her. Kakashi swallowed."Since it's so apparent that you have forgotten me." She whispered, but his time her tone was sad once more.
"What are you talking about?" He whispered." I could never forget you I love you-"
"DON'T LIE!" She cried, causing Kakashi to be a little taken aback."Please don't lie to me." Kakashi looked down at the women who sat cuddled into a ball in front of him. Was she afraid of him? No, she couldn't be. She knew that he wouldn't never hurt her, ever! So why was she shaking?
"Sakura, I would never lie to you. And this whole mess is a big understanding." He tried sooth her even though his voice was slightly shaky as well, tried make her see that he would never hurt her on purpose. He longed to hold her, to tell her that everything was going to be alright so, he took a slow step forward.
"I loved you. So much more then you loved me. I figured it out. Why you could so easily forget about me for another women." Sakura began to cry again. That was is, no more of this foolishness.
"Listen to me." Kakashi pleaded and ran towards her, kneeling down in front of her. Seeing how she instinctively shifted away, but refusing to let her run. "There isn't and will never be any other women but you, you hear me?" Still her eyes were elsewhere so Kakashi moved so that he could position himself to look directly into those sad eyes, her beautiful eyeliner was smudged and mixing with her tears was now running down her cheek. Her soft cheek.
"Please, don't-" Sakura was cut off when his lips suddenly clashed deep against hers, silencing her in the process. She panicked, feeling those emotions returning at the slightly touch of him, let alone a kiss. She squeezed her eyes shut, afraid that she was falling again. No, it could be. He had made his decision for another women, then way was he..?
His lips broke from hers but his warm arms remained around her small body and he pulled her into a tight embrace. Sakura's ear was pressed against his broad chest, and she could once again hear his heart as it fluttered rapidly in his chest. He was scared, but.. why?
"Sakura, I talked with Tsunde today. She says that she'll think of erasing the restraining order." Kakashi whispered as his lips rested comfortable on the top her head. Sakura gasped. What? Was it true, did Tsunde -sensei really say that? That maybe they could..."So please don't give up on me now." Sakura swallowed as her arms instinctively came to wrap around his shoulders just as they use to ever time that he would hug her.
"Kakashi.." She whispered softly into his chest." Oh Kakashi!" She cried and pulled even tighter to his body, needing to feel that sensation of what they shared before all of this."I'll never, could ever, give up on you."
"You silly girl." Kakashi whispered." Whatever gave you the idea that I was capable of forgetting you?" Sakura sniffled her sobs and slowly pulled from his embrace, to look deep into his eyes.
" It's nothing, that blonde girl doesn't matter, does she?" Sakura asked sheepishly. Kakashi ran his hand up her neck until it rested on her nape.
"Of course not. I told you that you're the only one didn't I?" He smiled. Sakura blushed and smiled slightly."Let's go somewhere." He replied.
"Okay,"She wanted to go somewhere, with him.."Where?"
"Doesn't matter,just away from here."Kakashi replied.
"Your apartment?"She suggested. He nodded in agreement.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kakashi reached for the doorknob of his single bedroom apartment, and with a small turn the door opened. No lock, no nothing.
"You don't lock you're door?" Sakura asked from where she stood behind him. Father had always taught her to lock the apartment up before leaving, so the thought that he wouldn't was slightly odd to her. Maybe it was worry, that someone, anyone could easily walk in at anytime. Foolish to be worried about such an excellent and very-well known Shinobi as he was, but she couldn't help it.
Kakashi turned back to her when he heard her smile question."Well, I use to..."He began, stopping to think of the answer himself." But I've come to realize that I don't want to keep myself locked inside, nor people outside."He replied. Sakura raised an eyebrow. What an odd response, but then again could she really expect anything different from the certainly most oddest man she knew. Although she was confused at first, she soon figured his response out. Maybe that was his way of telling her that he was tried of always being alone in the world. The he was ready to let people into his life, after having so many people be taken away from him. She felt sad and happy at his answer at the same time.
" I understand."She whispered and gave his hand a comforting squeeze as it intertwined with hers. His mask covered it, but she knew that he was smiling. She liked it when he smiled.
Kakashi lead her inside, and carefully shut the door behind her. Sakura took a look around. She hadn't been to his place in a while, but she felt a sense of comforting in seeing that everything in the small apartment hadn't been changed or altered in anyway. The kitchen, still surprisingly small, but cozy at the same time. Having many empty bowls of ramen and assorted noodle cartons spread out over the white counter. The walls in each of the three rooms the same plan white color that soothed her. There was a living room, that could be seen from the front hall through the banister next to the door that created a small wall. There was a single beige couch stationed in the centre of the small living room, and before it stood a beautiful wooden book shelf that was designed to hold his many volumes of Come come paradise and flirt paradise, or whatever they were called. His bedroom was conveniently well hidden behind the far living room wall.
"I've gotta use the bathroom."Kakashi whispered as to not disturb the comfortable silence that the room held.Sakura snapped her head back to him and nodded.
"Make yourself at home." He whispered into her ear, which sent pleasurable shivers down her spin and made goosebumps appear on her skin.His hand left hers as he walked off down the hall towards the bathroom set across from the bedroom. Yet another convenience.
After he had shut the door partly, Sakura moved from the front door towards the living room. The carpet beneath her bare feet was cool but she enjoyed the feeling. She gently touched his medals of honor set onto his mantel. Not surprised in the least to find a spot of dirt left over on her finger. Kakashi didn't care about medals or prizes. He just liked to serve Konoha, he had pledged his life to this country. As she did. But unlike him she secretly longed to be awarded for honors or receive a metal for contributing to this country. Anything to set her apart from just average ninja's.
She left the mantel and moved down the hall, spotting the picture of team seven hug on the wall in the hallway. Smiling to herself she crept past the bathroom and quietly opened the door to his bedroom. It smelt like him. And just like the other rooms was a plain white, and only held a double bed with a beautifully engraved head board. It look like a scene from some accent Chinese city, and she could tell that it was defiantly hand crafted. No longer able to hold back her curiosity, she moved towards the bed, around to the side so that her fingers could slowly run over the definitions. She wondered who had made it, did Kakashi? She doubted it. Maybe it was a family item, handed down to him. Either way, it was beautiful. Sakura knew that she was indeed sitting on his bed, the same place that he slept every night. Smiling to herself, she bent down to softly smell the pillow. Pines and spices.
Suddenly then sound of music filled the room. She turned in surprise to notice that Kakashi had re-entered the bedroom, and had set a CD into the player. She felt kind of guilty for going into his room without his permission, but as she listened deeper to the beat, she realized that she knew this song. Untitled by D'angelo. Such a soft song that mad her happy listening to it after such a long day of training. She had always loved the melody, is was so beautiful, not rushed but as if each note had a purpose. She loved the words, obviously whoever he was singing to he was in love with and wants to make love to her. Father would never let her listen to such music in his presence, but she always kept the CD close and hidden.
Girl it's only U,
Have it your way.
And if U want ,U can decide.
"You like this song,right?" Kakashi asked her but failed to turn around from where he was setting the Cd case back into the correct placement. He really didn't have very much CD to his collection, but she could see he liked completely different music then she did. More of the rock, when she preferred the love songs. She had always been so damn romantic. Sakura nodded as if he was able to see it, but realized he couldn't so replied with a yes as she returned back to her feet and letting her hand drop to her waist."I picked it up today in town, thought I'd give it a try."
And if you'll have me,
I can provide ,everything that U desire.
Sakura watched as he finally turned around to face her. His mask was missing, as was his over jacket. But even if this low light she could make out his well defined chest that could be seen due to the thin nature of his white shirt. He looked so damn good that evening, and it had only gotten better without the jacket. She mentally told herself to calm down. Her stomach had butterflies inside.
Said if U get a feeling
Feeling that I am feeling
"So do you like it?" She asked quietly over the music. Upon not hearing a response, she meet her gaze with his and was slightly taken aback. His gaze had changed somehow, he was looking at her strangely. Something in his eyes soothed her and made her heart race at the same time. She blushed as he moved closer towards her, each step slow and drawn out more then it had to be. The over welling desire for him to move quicker to get to her sooner was taking her over. She was in desperate need to finally touch him after these long days without him by her side. But the way he moved, just made her made him more. He was teasing her, she realized. But she liked it.
Won't U come closer 2 me baby,
You've already got me right where U want me baby
I just wanna be your man
Slowly, she reached her arm out in front of her, letting her small hand fall loose as she shut her eyes. Soon feeling his bold chest come into contact with her skin. He was so warm, and if felt so welcoming .His gentle yet rough hand came up and linked with hers, she let his strong fingers playfully run over each of hers as she willingly played along. Soon, he had grown board of this primal touch and moved in closer to her, directing her hand, still held softly in his, out to the side he welcomed her body into his as she closed to distance to him. Letting her body press comfortably into his, she moved her hand to touch his chest. Gently and also teasingly, running her fingers from his chest up to his open collarbones. She felt his hand come to rest on the small of her back, gently grazing her skin beneath the thin silk fabric of her dress which she still wore.
How does it feel
How does it feel
"You're so beautiful tonight."He whispered, letting his hand retreat from her back and reach up to trace the outline of her lips. Sakura felt her heart race quicken once again at his actions, it was if he was barely touching her skin but yet she could still feel his fingertips.
He bent down and placed a chaste kiss to her slightly parted lips. She had never been kissed like that before. It held no rush, no lust. But was innocent desire. Even his tongue, which would have been in her mouth by now, had chosen to be left out of this. But she needed his tongue, she longer for his tongue. So she deepen the kiss by pressing her lips harder into his and with a stubborn movement of some control, her tongue had dove into his mouth when his lips eventually parted to let her in.. He welcomed this action as they played this game as they engaged in a graceful dance. He left his eyes drifted shut completely, enjoying the movement of her tongue with his. She tasted so good.
Said I wanna know how does it feel
How does it feel
How does it feel
Slowly, yet forcefully, his hand slipped from the hold it had on hers, to come to rest on the nape of her neck. Slipping beneath what strands of loose hair had fallen from her up tied hairdo. Sakura felt more shivers run down her neck at the sensation of his touch, loving it. Following his actions of more hands on, she reached up to run her fingers in his hair, hearing his low chuckle as a result. She smiled into their kiss.
I wanna stop
Silly little games U and me play
But something strange happen next, something she never wanted to ever happen again. Sakura felt his hand leave her skin on the side of her neck and his body slowly withdraw from their closeness, instantly shivering at the coldness she felt without his body against hers. She looked at him in confusion, as he retreated a couple steps back.
"Why did you-"
"You're cold, do you want a blanket?"Kakashi asked.What was he talking about? Why did he stop? She thought that he wanted this, that he wanted her.
"I want you." She chuckle softly and moved closer to him with a small grin on her face. Her hands once again reached out to touch him like they had before, only to have his hands stop hers before she could touch his chest again. She looked up at him with slight hurt in her eyes."What is it?"She whispered.
"Sakura, you know that I want this more then anything in the world... but I'll wait for you... Until you're ready, I'll wait."He whispered. Sakura could feel tears fill her eyes, as she looked into the mix matched eyes above her that filled with such sincerity. He was really willing to wait for her? Even if he wanted this so much he would wait for her. The thought filled her with such happiness. He didn't love her for her body, he really truly... loved her. Exhaling the breathe that he she had been holding in, she slowly she leaned forward, pushing his arms wide so that her body could once again come into the desired contact with his body. Kakashi allowed this, this act of innocence was allowed. He let his body loosen into hers and remained there for a moment.
"Thank you, but..." Sakura took this time to step back from him, letting her arms her side, realizing his in the process. He watched her in mild surprise as she reached behind her and unhooked her hair, letting the pink locks fall over her face and dropping the clip to the floor as her feet."I'm ready now."She whispered. Kakashi felt a lump form in his throat as his eyes widen somewhat.
"Are- are you sure?" He asked. Was this really happening? Was it all just a dream, these where only a few thoughts that scrambled in his mind. But they all immediately disappeared when Sakura unhooked the back of her long gown, and without hesitation, let the thin material fall from her neck and down to her waist. He instantly felt his heart race quicken as he looked Upon her heavenly body. Her breasts were small yes, but they suit her body. Her skin looked so milky soft in the darkened light.
"Beautiful." He whispered. Sakura smiled and let the rest of her dress fall to her feet, letting his eyes roam over her body, studying each part.
And I am feeling right on
If U feel the same-way baby
Kakashi grabbed the end of his shirt and pulled it above his head revealing his well defined body, he tossed the clothing carelessly to the side.. Then unzipped his pants and slowly let them fall to his feet, along with his underwear.
Sakura's heart beat began to race as well as she studied his body. Blushing in slight embarrassment, as her eyes roamed his body as well. He was so fit, each muscle so perfect. He wore nothing, and yet in front of her, he looked so comfortable.
"Beautiful." She smiled. Kakashi moved over to her wrapping his arms around her body and with little effort, lifted her small body in his arms. She let her head fall onto his shoulder, as he set her gently on the bed. Pulling the thin bed sheet up from underneath her she watched as Kakashi climbed into the bed beside her. She reached out and ran her hands through his hair.
"Kakashi, please make me be the only one to touch you like this."She whispered.
"I promise."He replied and shifted as close to her as possible, slipping himself overtop of her small body. Bending down so that his lips could kiss the side of her neck. She tilted her head to allow his actions to continue, wrapping her arms gently around his back, drawing him closer to her. Her legs were smooth as they grazed his in a small dance of limbs. Feeling how his chest pressed against hers, until she rolled him over placing herself on top on him. Her eyes caught his as she captured him in a passionate kiss,
Let me know right away
I'd love to make you wet
In between your thighs cause
I love when it comes inside U
"Marry me." He mumbled in their kiss.
"What?" She pulled back.His hand cupped her face.
"Marry me."He whispered.Sakura's eyes teared up as she leapt into his arms.
"Yes, I will."She cried.
----------------------------------------
Oh getting kind of hot in thurr huh? Please review!
Thanx to D'angelo for making smooth love songs but big thanx to Zezura my awesome Beta Reader!