Rating: Yes, I know that I've updated the rating to M, but I've never been quite sure about the rating and I figured that it was better to be wrong than removed off fan-fiction. So, here it is.

Disclaimer: None of the characters mentioned in this story belong to me, but rather to J.K. Rowling, I promise to return them to her once I am done with them. The poem which this story features is taken from the novel, The Smoke Jumper by author Nicholas Evans.

Part Three – Forever

"For just as death is a part of life,

The dead live on forever in the living"

---

December 1975

Remus Lupin sighed and pulled his cloak tighter around himself before looking out at the dark night sky. He had no idea how he had allowed Sirius to convince him to come up to the top of the Astronomy Tower when they were meant to be sleeping. And in the middle of winter, no less!

"You can go inside if you're really cold, Remus." Remus turned his head to look at the boy, nearly a man, who sat beside him, his long black hair shielding his face from view.

"I'm fine." Remus said, even as he attempted to stop his teeth from chattering.

"Liar." Sirius said, shifting closer so that Remus felt his body burn where it touched Sirius. The other boy turned to face Remus and smiled, his white teeth glinting in the light from the moon. Remus shivered, though this time it wasn't due to the cold.

"I've always thought that you look more than a little psychotic when you smile in the middle of the night. Don't do it again or you may force me to jump off the tower." Remus said, causing Sirius to burst out in barking laughter.

"Then I'll just have to hold onto you, won't I?" Sirius said as he looped his arm around Remus' waist, holding tightly onto him. Remus bowed his head to hide the blush forming on his cheeks and silence ensued for a few moments as Sirius studied the stars above him. "I've always been fascinated by the stars." Sirius said quietly, though still causing Remus to jump slightly at the sound of his voice. Remus followed his friend's gaze to look at the stars which glittered in the dark sky.

"I wouldn't have thought it of you, Sirius. You never did do well at Astronomy." Remus said, smiling at his friend. "But I have to agree with you, they are the most beautiful part of the sky."

"And they last forever. That has always been my fascination with them."

"Ah, but they don't. You really didn't pay attention in Astronomy, did you? Half of those stars that we see up there now are already dead. Faded and no more. After all, forever is a very long time. Unaccountably long. Not even the stars or the sun last forever." Remus said, searching as he spoke for that one star he hoped would live forever. The Dog Star. For a few moments after this last statement Sirius was silent, but not long after he spoke again.

"As a child it was always my dream that I would live forever. That one day, my family would all be gone and I would be alone, the last of the Blacks. Free to do whatever I wanted, for however long I wanted to. I always dreamt that eventually, when I grew tired of the world, I would fly up into the night sky, and then Sirius, the Dog Star, would shine the brightest star of all. And all of those children, who lay awake in bed, they would make their wishes on me, the brightest star, and I would see them fulfilled. I like to think that the Dog Star will live on forever."

Remus was shocked to find that tears glistened in his eyes and he turned from Sirius to brush them away. "As do I. That way the wishes of so many would be granted." As if sensing something left unspoken in Remus' voice, Sirius turned to face his friend again.

"And what do you wish for most of all, Remus?" His voice was sincere, and Remus had to look away again for fear that his eyes would tell the truth before his voice was able to tell the lie. He glanced first at the stars, and then his gaze moved towards that thing he dreaded most of all. The thing that had the power to turn him into a monster he hated. The moon.

"I wish… I wish that the moon was never full. For all of its beauty, the moon for me is the most dangerous thing of all. It's not right that something so beautiful should be so dangerous." Remus spoke to the stars, he would not look at Sirius. He had never been very good at lying to his friends, Sirius in particular, and he feared that if he turned to look at his friend now, Sirius would see what it was that Remus truly wished for most of all. Himself.

"Ah, but that is the way of things, my friend. What is most beautiful is always the most dangerous. For what can be beautiful if it does not also represent danger, a challenge?" As he spoke Sirius' arm tightened its hold on Remus' waist. "Take me for example." Sirius said, his tone light. "I am, am I not, the most beautiful man in the entire world? And yet I am also dangerous. Allow me to demonstrate." And with that, Sirius jumped to his feet and moved to the very edge of the Tower.

"Sirius, don't be stupid. You're going to get us hurt." Remus protested as Sirius dragged him along with him.

"And that is exactly my point, my dear Remus." Remus shivered at the images conjured by this simple and casual phrase. "If I took one more step forward, and if I took you with me, I could make both of our wishes come true. For with that one step, we would meet our deaths. In death, the moon, for all of its beauty and power, would be unable to touch you. You would be free from that power, that other side, which you hate more than anything. And I?" Here Sirius paused to take a deep breath, as if to savour this moment in time. "With death, I too would be free, free of my family and my obligations. I would be able to live forever, to join the stars in that world I have always dreamt of. But," and Sirius stepped away from the edge of the tower, "we cannot make such a choice. Just as we cannot decide when those stars up there will die and vanish from our sight, so we cannot decide when it is time for us to die and be free."

Sirius turned away from Remus and the stars and seated himself back against the wall of the tower. Remus smiled as he thought over what Sirius had said; one part of him wished that those silly girls who proclaimed to love Sirius madly could hear him now so that they would be able to truly love him, but the other part wanted these words to be only for him.

"Oh well, I'll go on believing that the stars will live forever, as will I, hopefully." Sirius' voice echoed through the night sky. "That dream kept me going through the first eleven years of my life, and I'm sure it will do the same for the rest of it. You see, Remus, death is not for me. Death is only for other people. Me, I am going to live forever." Sirius looked up at his friend and, seeing perhaps the scepticism hidden there said, "Just you wait and see, Remus. I'm going to make you believe it. I've always believed in it, you're just the first person I've ever told. James doesn't even know."

"You just continue to believe in that Sirius, and I'm sure you'll do fine in life. Except do remember occasionally that you are not completely invincible. I don't want to have to wear a dress robe for your funeral. I look terrible in a dress robe." This last statement earned another bark of laughter from Sirius, and Remus smiled. "Me, the moon will wax and wane for all time, whether I wish it to or not. But I will continue to live until it is my time for the suffering to be over. Until then, there are other's who deserve death, and the peace that comes with it, more than I do."

Remus remained standing for a few moments until he began to shake with the cold again and was forced to sit back down beside Sirius, who smiled and wound his arm around Remus again, keeping him warm.

"Remus?" Sirius said after some time, breaking the silence.

"Hmm?" Remus mumbled, half asleep.

"We're going to be friends right? For as long as forever grants us? We'll be able to trust each other always and know that the other will always be here?" Remus sat up, awake now.

"I hope so. Life would be so different without you, and James and Peter. I don't think that I'd know what to do. I'd feel… empty in a way. You guys are so much a part of me that I wouldn't know what to do anymore." As Remus spoke he knew what he said to be the truth.

"Good. Because I don't plan on leaving any time soon. So you'll just have to put up with me." Remus had always marvelled at the way Sirius was able to change his tone of voice from humorous to serious so often and seemingly so effortlessly.

"I think that I'll be able to cope." Remus said, before leaning back against the wall of the tower.

"Don't get too comfortable." Sirius warned. "We should head back in soon."

"Hmm…" Was Remus' only reply and the last sound made for quite some time. For a while there was peace, just the two of them, sitting there on top of the Astronomy Tower, thinking of the stars and of the moon, of life and death and of friendship. But most of all; thinking of forever.